I hope you all enjoy. I'm back on track with the updating everyday thing ^^ I'm feeding my obessessions so I'm not having withdrawal symptoms. Anyone who says obessessing over animes and anime characters is unhealthy might be right, but I love anime so GRR! Anyway, please enjoy and review so I can have the motivation to continue! Back to the story!
Warnings: sadness, possible OOC, sweetness, multiple POVs (sorry if you hate it jumping around so much but I like showing other people's perspectives, tell me in the comments what you think about that if you can)
After that hellish day, I had to get back to work the next day. I really wanted to spend more time with my sons, but Tom needs me and I can't let him down. Izaya is busy at work too so I'm taking the kids to Shinra's so they can have fun there (and probably make a mess of Shinra's place, which is always a bonus, sarcastically speaking). I'm kind of hesitant of leaving my kids with Shinra, not because I think he'd do anything shady (Celty would never allow him to even touch my kids), but because I feel like Shinra and Celty are becoming more of Shiro and Kuro's parents each time I send them over, which is usually during the week.
Izaya is really paranoid about it too. He tells me every now and again about the fear and then reminds me of some show he watched where a mother had that happen to her. I really do understand the fear, but I don't think our kids would do that because they're really attached to us. They always dread going to Shinra's place even if they do love Shinra and Celty.
"Daddy, can we go with you to work instead?" Kuro asks as he walks beside me while Shiro walks on the other side.
"I'm sorry boys, you're gonna have to stay at Uncle Shinra's place for the time being. Celty is gonna be really happy. She told me yesterday that she loves you two visiting." I explain to Kuro happily. Sure Celty loves the two kids, probably because Shinra and her don't have children of their own.
"I don't want to go to Uncle Shinra's place…I want to be with you or Mommy…" Kuro says sadly.
"I know…but Mommy and I have to go to work and nobody is gonna be at the house." I explain sternly. If I had a more appropriate job where I didn't lose my temper every five minutes, then I'd gladly take my kids along, but being a bodyguard isn't exactly an ideal job. I mean it pays decently, but I really don't want to take my kids to places where Tom's clients only complain and lie and then have myself lose my temper in front of my children.
When we get to Shinra's apartment, I have Kuro knock on the door. Celty opens the door and I can tell, even though she doesn't have a head, she's really happy to see us. She pats Shiro and Kuro's heads and types down on her PDA to sit down. I tell her I have to get to work. This is sort of our routine; they're our babysitters (well usually Celty is since Shinra works, but sometimes he helps), so we don't even have to keep asking them if they can watch the kids. Celty's always home since Shinra's the only who works now. Izaya and I pay Celty to babysit since she's usually the one who's around to do so.
The boys already know that Celty doesn't have a head, but she keeps her helmet on whenever they're around anyway, probably because she feels embarrassed. The whole discovery came about on accident when Kuro, Shiro and I were visiting. Kuro was playing with his ball and had thrown it against the wall a bit too hard and had knocked Celty's helmet off. The boys' reactions weren't too extreme. I suppose that they thought it was cool. I was just glad they didn't freak out and make Celty feel bad.
When I asked them what they thought about Celty now, they just told me that they still love Aunt Celty. It really warmed my heart and her heart when I told her. I bet if she had her head, she'd be crying that day.
"You two behave now." I say as I head out. I never know what goes on with them when I leave and I'm hoping it's nothing too disastrous, but Celty usually tells me that everything goes pretty well and that there's never anything to worry over. I just don't want to get stuck with a big bill like I always do whenever I take my kids out somewhere. Apart they're really not that bad, but together it's like they can take any home and they can turn it into a madhouse.
Celty's POV
I'm really glad the Heiwajima kids are here. It gets kind of lonely here at home whenever Shinra leaves for work. What's more is that they really are good kids, though they can be a handful. Shinra doesn't usually interact with them so much when they come here to be babysat. When he is here, he likes to joke around about him giving them checkups and taking blood samples. I hit him in the gut whenever he says that.
"Aunt Celty…can we play that game you always play with us?" Kuro, the younger of the two asks me as he clings onto me. Kuro might be sweet a lot of the time, but he's one hell of a mischievous boy. One time we had gone out into town to pick up some groceries. Yeah, that wasn't my best idea. Kuro and Shiro ran off and then started making a mess of the aisles. I had to pay for the damages, but then Shizuo paid me back. Such a disaster didn't make me love the kids any less though. They're still very kind.
[Alright who wants to go first?] I write down on my PDA and show it to them. It's actually nice; my PDA serves two purposes when they're around. It helps me communicate and it helps them learn to read. It's nice to look on the brighter sides of things.
"Shiro, you can go first." Kuro says to his brother as he waits for the game to start. I nod and with my black aura I make a figure and have Shiro guess what it is. It's a game that serves two purposes; it teaches and it keeps the two boys occupied for an hour or so. Whoever has more wins from guessing correctly is the winner; that's how this game is played. Kuro usually wins since he's very deceptive, which reminds me of his mother.
"A donkey?" I shake my head. Kuro writes down on a whiteboard his and his brother's names so he can count the points.
"A telephone?" Kuro asks as he looks at it carefully. I shake my head again. This can take quite a long time before anyone guesses the right answer, which is fine by me as long as they don't destroy anything, I'm happy.
"A gorilla?" I shake my head again. I can't really explain this feeling within me as I'm here playing this silly game with these kids. Shinra says that it's all a part about being human which makes me happy. I really love these kids and I hope that I stay in touch with them for a long time (or as long as Izaya allows me to). These days I really do feel Izaya is worrying a lot. I can sense that he's worrying over the fact that he's spending less and less time with his children. And I don't blame him over worrying over something like that. He watches a lot of drama series though. I'm sure he's overreacting and I can just imagine the ordeal Shizuo has to go with. I see Izaya now and again, but Shizuo has to deal with him every day; maybe not every second of everyday, but either way it's still a lot.
I never really understood why they got together in the first place. It was like one of the great mysteries of the world…Kuro says it's like the mystery of how chips sometimes resemble famous people. I just think it's strange, but then again if it wasn't for them getting together I would never had the opportunity to meet these two boys sitting before me. They resemble their parent's a lot; Kuro being the more mischievous of the two and Shiro being the more stern and robust one. Shiro has his dad's stubbornness and Kuro has his mother's calm, curious nature. They're like little mini copies.
I contemplate this for a while as the boys continue guessing the various figures I make with my black aura. After a while, Kuro finally wins again. Shiro isn't a sore loser though and so he brushes the game off completely and asks if they could watch TV. I say yes and allow them to fiddle with the remote. They don't argue over what to watch though, which is supposed to be normal for siblings, right? Hmm, everything I read in books seems to be inaccurate, for these kids at least. I need to buy new books.
"Last time on Alien Hunt!" The TV announces loudly. Kuro smiles and claps as he sets down the remote. He tugs at my suit and smiles at me with his cat-like grin.
"It's our favorite show!"
[You don't think those kinds of things really exist, do you kids?] I ask them nervously. Of course I probably am not going to be reassured by what these kids tells me, but I just want to be comforted I suppose.
"Yeah we do, even if Daddy says it's…it's…what was the word that Daddy said, Shiro?" Shiro's about to answer when I wave my arms frantically. I rather not allow the kids to remember such language let alone think it's alright to mimic it. "Well anyway…if aliens did suddenly appear Daddy would probably knock them out."
[You're right…It's just…it freaks me out a bit…]
"Don't worry Aunt Celty; we won't let some dumb aliens get you. Besides Daddy would never let them hurt you or anybody." Kuro reassures me as he smiles. "We can watch something else if you want."
[No, it's alright.] I type on my PDA.
To tell you the truth, talking with Shiro and Kuro makes me feel better. They're still young so I don't talk to them about a lot of adult issues I have, just small things. It's nice to talk to them because they're quite smart so they'll sometimes give me advice on things. Ah, no wonder Izaya is so attached to them. They are his children after all. He's really different than he was before, but it's expected since he's a mother now. I really like teasing him about that since it's not a nature type you would expect coming from the Great Izaya Orihara—I mean—the Great Izaya Heiwajima. Shizuo is one lucky guy.
Izaya's POV
Paperwork…more paperwork…bills…that big scorch mark on the carpet. I have to tidy everything up. Yesterday I didn't get any work done with Kuro around, but I'm not mad about it. It's not like I had any clients to meet with anyway.
I have a photo on my desk which has a family picture in it. It really makes me happy, along with the name plate beside it which reads "Izaya Heiwajima." Ah, Shizu-chan must be at work right now and the kids are with "Uncle Shinra" and "Aunt Celty." I really miss being there for my children. I wish I could be a stay-at-home mom, but I do enjoy having this job, despite getting some shady characters. But, it's nothing I can't handle.
Now that I think about it…it's almost me and Shizu-chan's anniversary. I already got him a gift a while back. I'm always prepared. Shizu-chan always buys me something wonderful, which surprises me sometimes that he knows me so well. It's just discouraging that our family is ripping at the seams. Last night Shizu-chan and I discussed the ever-growing problem with Shiro's attachment towards me. He was none-too pleased with the news he had received from Shiro yesterday afternoon about the whole bath time routine, but I do the same with Kuro so I don't see what the problem is.
"You're babying him too much…" Shizu-chan says as he runs his fingers through his hair. "I know it might hurt him, but you have to stop taking baths with him or letting him sleep here with us. You have to draw a line otherwise he's gonna have trouble at school. Heck, he might not even want to go…"
I know in my heart such things are true. I do baby him a bit too much. If I wasn't so emotional nowadays, I'd probably be able to stand my ground and discipline Shiro more, but such a task is beyond me now that I've become…soft…Gah, I hate admitting it, but it's true. I'm not like that so much with Shizu-chan, though from time to time my emotions seem to override my manly bravado.
For my birthday Shizu-chan took me out to a nice restaurant and then we went to a hotel to spend the night and to do…other things…Shiro and Kuro stayed with Shinra and Celty for that night. It was tough on me to leave my children, but I really missed spending time with Shizu-chan. I feel the same way right now. He and I don't get to spend too much time together. I'm hoping that for our anniversary, Shizu-chan will take me out and give me the much needed attention I deserve (and the much needed attention my body deserves).
Shizuo's POV
I don't remember feeling this sore in my life. Even after I had been hit by that truck a long time ago, the soreness wasn't this bad…The cost of having children: indefinable soreness of the body. Eh, it's not that bad of a cost, but it still hurts. Kuro and Shiro like hanging out with Celty and Shinra, but they prefer being with Izaya and me. I'm hoping they're doing alright.
"You okay, Shizuo?" Tom asks me as he waves his hand in front of my face.
"Huh? Oh…oh yeah, I'm fine…"
"How are the kids?" Tom asks with a smile.
"Still as troublesome as ever." I tell him with a smile. "But I wouldn't want it any other way."
"That's what I like to hear." Tom says with a nod. "Your anniversary is coming up, right? Did you get your princess a gift?"
"If Izaya heard you call him a princess he'd throw a damn knife at your head." I add in with a laugh. "I got him something already. I always dodge a bullet every anniversary."
"Hmm?"
"I'm always thinking that he's not going to like the gift, but it always turns out that he loves everything I've given him. Can you believe that?"
"You must be doing something right." Tom says with a laugh. "Oh right, I met up with Kasuka yesterday and he said if I could give you a letter…so…here." He hands me a small envelope with a letter inside so I open it and read it.
Think back when you were a kid and hated how you had that strength. Then think of how Shiro must feel not knowing what to do. Comfort him and teach him how to control it and how to feel proud about it. Don't leave him in the dark and dismiss his feelings.
Love Kasuka
P.S. Izaya told me about how you failed to mention how Kuro doesn't quite like me. I hope that you can visit sometime so I can change that.
Why does he always sound so intelligent?
"Mind telling me what it said? I've been curious about it." Tom asks as he puts his hands in his pockets.
"He told me to stop being so blind and stupid." I say as I smile as I look up at the sky.
Celty's POV
After playing cards, eating lunch and then going to the park to play with a frisbee Kuro finally went to sleep when we got back. His brother, however, is always another story; if it's not one, it's the other. But, I was kind of hoping to talk with Shiro alone since I really want to ask him about what issues he has with his father. I've been quite worried since Shizuo is a good friend and I know that he's been stressing out about his son not liking him.
I sit on the couch after putting Kuro to bed. He's napping right now and like his father, he's a heavy sleeper. Shiro is a light sleeper like his mother that's why I'm told by Izaya that he has grown accustomed to sleeping with him so he doesn't have nightmares thus separating Shizuo and him from being closer in bed. Their love life, I assume, is therefore faulting.
Shiro is sitting comfortable on the couch, flipping the channels on the TV. I sit beside him and tap his shoulder to get his attention. He turns to me and asks me what it is I want, but not in a rude way.
[Are you in love with your mother?] I know it's a crazy question to ask so abruptly—to ask at all really, but it's still possible. Shiro puts his hands in his lap and blushes as he looks at the floor.
"N-no I don't. Why would you ask that?" Shiro asks nervously.
[Well, you seem to really not like your father, especially when he's around your mother.] I write simply.
"It's not that…" Shiro says as he clenches his pants in his lap. "My dad…"
[Your dad what?] I'm really terrified that maybe something happened between his mother and his father that he witnessed, even though I know fairly well that Shizuo wouldn't dare hurt Izaya despite him occasionally fighting with him.
"Dad is a monster right?" He asks me all of a sudden.
[Your dad isn't a monster. Everyone has their flaws, but your father has learned to live with them and accept them. So has your mother. He loves your father no matter what. And you know that, don't you.] It wasn't really meant to be a question, more like a noted fact.
"I know…but Mom deserves better…" He states vehemently. "This is not like some story book…a monster shouldn't be with Mom…I know everything that happened between them…I know about what Dad is…Mom needs someone better who won't hurt him one day. I know that one day Dad will go crazy and try and hurt Mom and I don't want that to happen. Mom needs someone who will really love him and won't ever hurt him. And besides it's his fault I'm like he is. I'm a monster but…I would never hurt Mom…"
[So you're saying that you're scared your mother will be hurt one day by your father? And that you want your mother to find someone else who will love him enough to be in control of themselves? Maybe you're trying to be that someone for your mother?] I must have hit the nail on the head because he sort of flinched and clenched at his pants more tightly and then tears started to stream down from his eyes. I make a handkerchief from my black aura, but he refuses to take it.
"I'll be there for Mom no matter what and I'll never hurt him…Even if I'm a monster like Dad…I'd never hurt Mom, but I'm just trying to keep Mom away from Dad so he doesn't get hurt…" Shiro explains. It's obvious to me now that he's not doing this because he's in love with his mother. He's scared of his father and he wants to do everything in his power to protect him. And he wants to replace his father's "faulting" love with his own, not the type of love one gets from a lover, but something equivalent. "You won't tell anyone will you, Auntie?"
[No, your secret is safe with me.] I say as I pat his head. [But you should tell your mother and father.]
"What will that do?"
[It will help them understand you better. They're terribly confused and worried about you. You do know that you're mother really wants you to love your father too, right?]
"I've always known that…I just can't do it though. Even if Dad saved me yesterday…it just proves to me that he's really strong and if he does get mad at Mom, I won't be able to stop him. So, I'm trying to keep it from happening." Shiro says sadly. "You don't hate me, do you Auntie?"
[No, of course not.] I type down honestly. [Let me tell you a story though. Will you just listen to me?]
"Okay…" Shiro says nervously.
So…I told him the story of how is father and mother first met (the story that Shinra had told me so I would better understand their relationship). I told him about every single moment they had with each other and even told him all bad stuff they had gone through together. And though I know I was supposed to…I told him the story about the most crucial days Shiro had spent in the hospital because he was very sick after he was born.
"Why…why was I sick?" Shiro asks sadly.
[Shinra and the other doctors that he works with weren't sure, but they thought that you weren't going to make it. You're mother was also not feeling well so he couldn't visit you while you were in a separate room, but he knew what was going on. Your father…your father was really depressed about it...everyday he'd visit you and hold your hand and pray that you would be alright. He cried for you. He prayed. He even got so angry that one day when Shinra and I were there, he picked Shinra up by his collar and said "Don't you dare let my son die! I don't care what it takes; just make sure my son lives through this."] I pause and feel something pull at my heartstring as I remember his face when he had threatened Shinra. He was crying, but still able to get mad like that. [After that, Shinra looked far and wide for a doctor that could so something for you. This is why your father had to get a second job to pay for all the expenses. He didn't mind it though because he was just happy if you got help, which you finally did. And now you're the healthy boy you are today.]
There was something in Shiro's eyes that wasn't there before. I could tell he wanted to cry, that he wanted his father right here to apologize to, but he couldn't do that just yet. He seemed like he felt that accepting his father would mean he'd betray his mother and more importantly he doubted that this meant that his father was incapable of hurting his mother, but I still felt something changed in him.
After a couple more hours, Shizuo finally came to pick them up before dinner. I was pleased with how Shiro greeted his father when he had entered. He had embraced him so passionately; one would have thought he had fallen in love with him. Such a thing is ridiculous though. There are still some bumps in the road for that family, but I doubt they'll give up.
Before they left I sent Shizuo a text message. I really hope he understands.
Shizuo's POV
Something's different about my son. As I'm walking with Shiro and Kuro now, I sense something different in Shiro that wasn't there before. He had hugged me when I went to go pick him and his brother up from Shinra's place.
My phone suddenly rings, indicating I've received a message, so I fish it out of my pocket and read it.
Life is full of perspectives, good and bad. Even when you're not trying to, you make an image of yourself through your words and actions. Help people understand and accept you, including your family.
A/N: That tugged at my heartstrings while I was writing it. Shizuo is such a good father and husband! TT~TT Please review and tell what you thought about it ^^ Also, if anyway wants to give me some ideas of what to write about in the next chapter or whatever or what you really want to read, please send me a PM. Anyway thank you to all my readers, reviews, favoriters I LOVE YOU ALL!