A continuation of the drama from the last chapter. Apparently Siria has some kind of inferiority complex...
There are a little more military-esque terms than usual (both official and slang), so Google a phrase up if you don't know what it means!
Thanks to Gala and grammaguy for reviewing!
Chapter 13: Solace
The Latias stalked out of the dorm, slow walk quickly turning into a frenzied dash as she straightened her wings. "Damn it. Damn it all!" she choked, leaping and using her psychic energy to sustain her flight. She didn't even feel the blunt impact of the cool air as she accelerated far too fast for safety, completely senseless from the argument with her brother. The wind that passed her ruffled and tossed her down, ruining the nearly-perfect sheen she had paid so much attention to. Siria couldn't care less about how she looked, though. The only thing that filled her mind was a choleric mixture of anger, pain, and sorrow. Looking behind her, she could see the forward base slowly fade in the distance. She shot it a contemptuous look, wishing that flying away from it could make everything she hated disappear from her life. But nothing's that simple, is it?
As she continued to fly, she felt the dull warmth of the setting sun on her body, much of it absorbed by her navy blue T-shirt. I hate it. I don't know why, but I absolutely hate it. She glared at the giant star as if she could incinerate it through psychic power. After failing at this, she looked downwards, trying to get a good estimate of her location. Under normal circumstances she would know exactly where she was, but these weren't normal circumstances, were they?
She suddenly gasped for air, a result of her not keeping track of how far she was above the ground. The cloudless sky offered no gauge for her position, thinning atmosphere the only indicator as to how much higher Siria needed to transcend the death zone, an airspace where it would be impossible for any flying 'mon to breathe in enough oxygen to sustain flight or life, for that matter. As she began to consider how much farther she would need to go to kill herself, something she saw below her distracted her from her suicidal thoughts. She could pick out a grassy knoll far below her, a single tree dotting its top. It was the hill that she and her brother would always go to pick Pamtre Berries to bring back to base, though Sirius was more partial to the spicier Spelon Berries all the way back at home. The mere thought of the Latios brought fresh tears to her eyes as she tried to purge her mind of the memories. Arceus-dammit, why do I have to be reminded of him?
Not even thinking twice, she dived straight downwards at the hill, calling upon her innate ability to accelerate up to the cruising speed of a fighter jet but going a little slower only because breaking the sound barrier would undoubtedly liquefy all of her internal organs. Not that she would mind dying; the Latias simply didn't want to experience too much pain or discomfort when she did so. Her track pants whistled at her movement, threatening to either shred or simply rip off her body as the wind tore by them. However, though what could be considered nothing less than a miracle, the rapid five-second descent left her completely clothed as she decelerated to a halt, floating only a meter above the ground. Releasing her psychic control over her body, she fell to the ground in a crumpled heap, whimpering lightly at the pain she felt. Not a moment later, she began to beat at it, punching and tearing savagely at the grass.
"Arceus-dammit!" Siria unsheathed her oft-hidden claws as she tried but absolutely failed in renting the ground with a Dragon Claw. A clod of dirt flew upwards as her attack left a pathetically small gash in the grass. The scent of fresh soil began to fill the air as she flailed unsuccessfully at the ground again, achieving nothing but marring her clothing with grass and dirt stains. "Why did I have to kill them? Why couldn't I be strong and finish that damn Glaceon when I had the chance? Why couldn't I save him before he died?" she cried, still attacking the ground uncontrollably. "Why can't I keep my emotions in? Why do I have to be so weak?" Tears rolled down her cheeks and meshed with the damp soil her gouges had exposed. "Why can't I be like Sirius?" She suddenly halted and widened her eyes at the last outburst, taking a minute for her mind to fully register what she had just said. Did I just… no….
"Oh, Arceus…" she breathed. Flipping over, she scooted backwards, resting against the rough bark of the tree. The confused Latias folded her legs into her chest and wrapped her arms around them, lowering her head and sobbing softly in the glow of the setting sun.
Shadrach, looking for an opportunity to slip by and get off base, watched the convoy of tented cargo trucks and infantry fighting vehicles lining up at the gate. The logistic units came to bring everything imaginable to the forward operations base, from rifle cartridges and tank shells for military operations to shoes and television sets for the local PX, where soldiers could buy consumer goods they normally wouldn't be able to purchase. After spending the day unloading, the fleet would return back to society to pick up the same supplies to ferry to other bases scattered throughout the country. The Umbreon couldn't help but observe the transport crew with interest as they marshaled the fleet into a straight line, several 'mon weaving between the large trucks and waving their arms. Luckily for those who lived on the rather large base, the roads to the north were recently de-mined of Tamsus explosives, so logistics' visits were weekly rather than monthly.
With a faint shout in the distance, the front vehicle, a brutish-looking APC with a menacing autocannon affixed to the turret, roared to life, belching black smoke from its rear exhaust. The five or six trucks behind it also did the same as several 'mon ran towards them, pushing a cart with several wooden boxes on top. After the rest of the goods were packed, the line moved slowly as the first armored vehicle took some time to accelerate, but within thirty seconds the entire convoy was moving, two extra IFVs bringing up the rear so that no Tamsus insurgent could attempt an attack and escape unscathed. As the last armored vehicle left the base, a Pidgeot and a Lucario pushed shut a pair of gate doors that were easily taller than them, chaining them together with a heavy steel lock. A large, obnoxious sign hanged near the top of one chain-link fence said "STOP" in commanding letters; below it was a block of significantly smaller text that said in no unkind terms that anyone leaving without signed consent from a higher up would be court martialed. A loopy scrawl below the warning, obviously added by the gate guards, added that the aforementioned criminal would receive a good ass-whooping before being turned over to military police. As Shadrach got close enough to the gate to read everything, he involuntarily felt a slight chill go up his back, praying to Arceus that this James that Levina had mentioned would be as lax as she hinted he would be.
The Umbreon walked up behind the pair of retreating 'mon, who were about to climb up an observation post. "Excuse me, do you know if there's a James on duty tonight?"
Both the Pidgeot and the Lucario turned around, the former eyeing him suspiciously. "He may. Why?" the flying-type asked in a gruff voice, tossing his plumage.
Shadrach, not knowing how to hint that he needed to get out without explicitly stating it, replied ambiguously, "I need to talk to him about something."
He snorted. "Well, James isn't in a talking mood. Sorry."
As the Pidgeot began to turn around, the Lucario caught his shoulder. Taking off his helmet, he began, "I'm James. What do you need? And sorry for Donnie's behavior." He waved a paw at his partner. "He's not the kindest of 'mon, as you can tell." The flying-type scowled at the Lucario as he gave his introduction.
"Yes, well, I was told by Levina that if I needed to get off base, I should just talk to you and mention her name."
James put his paw to his mouth, pondering the Umbreon's request. "Levina… Levina… Akyra? The Ampharos?" he responded, seeming to recognize her name. As Shadrach nodded his head, he continued, "What's the reason? Even though I may seem laid back to you, I need to know for sure that you won't do anything that'll cost jobs or, more importantly, lives." His friendly demeanor turned a bit colder as he looked at the dark-type with sterner eyes. The spikes on the back of his paws gleamed threateningly as they caught the light tower's beams.
Shadrach opened his mouth and then closed it, weighing the two choices he had. On one hand, if he didn't divulge the reason, what chance did he have of getting out? But on the other, could he really disclose that he had to convince a particularly angry and unstable Latias to return to base? After a deliberate silence, he chose to walk the line between the two, replying, "I can tell you if I must, but it's rather personal and important to me."
The Lucario frowned at his response, mulling it over. Then, his eyes glowed red for a second. Shadrach tensed up, not knowing what the fighting-type was doing. "I'm going to be perfectly honest here," James said after a deliberate silence. "Your reason sucks because it tells me nothing and just makes me more suspicious of you. But," he continued, noting the Umbreon's dismay. "Your Aura looks honest, so I do believe you in that regard, not to mention Levina trusts you enough to tell you about me." Shadrach relaxed at his announcement.
"Ok, here's what you gotta do. You know the barriers that surround the whole base? There's a particular one in front of our post, which is here." He pointed to a wooden frame of a guard tower, fit almost perfectly against a concrete shield. "In front of it, there's a plank of wood. Lift it up, and there's a tunnel. There's a brown blanket covering the other side, so be sure to replace it snugly so it meshes in with the rest of the dirt. Then, you're home free. Use the same way to come back, except do a special knock on the wood." He rapped a particular pattern on his paw. "Since I'll on duty all night, I'll tell the other guards not to shoot at you if I see you coming back. Oh, and do you plan to bring someone back with you?" The Umbreon nodded tightly. "Yeah, if you promise if it's not a Tamsus 'mon (which it probably won't be; you're trustful) I'll tell them not to shoot anyone with you either."
"Thank you, James," Shadrach replied in turn, impressed with the lengthy but very informative explanation. Feeling a little bit guilty that he had nothing else of value to add, he turned and began to walk towards the spot that the Lucario had mentioned.
"Oh, also," the Umbreon heard James call out. "Good luck with that girl." At the mention of Siria, blood began to rush to Shadrach's tall ears as he wondered just how much the fighting-type had picked up from looking at his Aura.
After he got over his mild embarrassment, Shadrach casually walked behind one of the beams of the guard tower and looked around, trying to see if anyone was watching him. Seeing no one in particular focusing on him, he dimmed the rings on his body to minimize his profile so that he would attract little attention later on. As he strained his eyes a bit, he could see the dirt-brown piece of wood the Lucario had told him about. With one more glance around him, he hit the dirt, crawling to the plank. With little effort, he was able to slide it to the left, revealing a decently large tunnel. No Dialga or Palkia stood a chance of worming their way inside, but for a medium-sized 'mon like him, getting into it was easy.
After lifting the plank up with his paws and putting it back above him the best he could, Shadrach turned around and began to crawl, not even needing more than fifteen seconds to notice a similarly-sized hole at the end. Smelling the cool night air blowing in, he slid his paw under one side of the fabric, folding it over to the other side. The twinkling of stars greeted him as he pressed down his ears and poked his head out, looking for any MPs or guards on patrol. After his short assessment assured him that no one was present, he lifted his body out of the hole, stealing towards the trees that laid to the west after readjusting the camouflage blanket. He constantly kept vigilance, paranoid that a random 'mon would catch him because the base's lighting illuminated his body. His alertness was not necessary, though; with minimal effort he reached the edge of the trees, slipping into the darkness of the small grove. The small touchscreen PDA he held in front of him showed a small blue dot linked to a red dot with a long yellow line, indicating that he had a ways to go before reaching Siria. Undeterred by this prospect, the Umbreon began the walk, still watching for guards or worse, hiding Tamsus insurgents.
"I really wish I hadn't joined the military." Siria sighed as she sat up on the grass. "Worst choice of my life. Even worse than downing four X Speed pills for that all-nighter years ago." She gazed out at the night sky, picking out the bright lights of the stars. Just a day before, everything had been going perfectly. She performed most of her missions without fail, advised senior officers on military topics that were beyond incomprehensible to her peers, and even found out that she was to be promoted to Staff Sergeant by the end of the month. She had actually been content with her life!
The Latias fell on her back, putting her hands behind her head. Exhausted both mentally and physically, she had no energy left to scream or throw another tantrum. All she could do is lie there, watch the stars above her, and wonder how the hell one night could have changed her life so much. She had gone from mostly cool and collected to a blubbering mess in the space of a few hours. At this rate I'll be discharged from Special Forces… hell, I might be discharged from the military just for being out here. There was no incentive for going back to base; nothing good awaited her there. She could only imagine what would happen if she tried to return….
A group of uniformed Arcanine at the gate, harsh lights above fully revealing their disgruntled faces. One in front barking menacingly, brandishing a pair of metal handcuffs at her. Levina looking down in disappointment, comical expression turned solemn by her transgression. Shadrach, face overrun by sadness and angst by her arrest. Her brother, looking at her with a face of awful pain and regret, just like when she had hit him back in their room…. We were supposed to stick together! she would hear him practically shout in his head. We were supposed to ride this out 'till the end! She promised! WE promised! She would avert her gaze, trying to block every sense of overwhelming remorse and betrayal that came from the three of them. And then….
She froze as a sighing sound came from behind her. Scared out of her wits, she jumped in the air and hovered, prepared to deal with whatever threat had suddenly come up behind her. Detecting nothing in her vision, Siria slowly floated over and peeked behind the tree. The last thing she expected to see was an Umbreon leaning against the trunk, looking out at the night sky. He turned slowly towards her, slight smile on his face. "How are you doing tonight, Siria?" he asked.
"Shadrach!" the Latias yelped, feet touching the ground as she looked at him in surprise. "What are you doing here? And how did you sneak up so easily?"
"I'm an Umbreon. That's what we're supposed to do. And you looked really deep in thought, so I didn't want to interrupt you. As for the first question, I was hungry," he replied humorously, reaching up to a low-lying branch and pulling down a berry. "Though, I think a better question is, what are you doing here?"
"I wanted to relax and get some fresh air." Her voice wavered as the fib passed through her lips.
"Really? I thought you usually read after training."
"Well, today's different," she said a little defensively, not willing to budge and tell him the truth.
He looked at the Latias, tossing the Pamtre Berry up and down lightly. "Different how? Enough to break regulations? Because-" Here he lowered his voice as if an eavesdropping MP were to suddenly jump up from behind and arrest him. "The courts don't take too well to AWOLs."
"I know that Shadrach."
"Then what are you doing here?"
"I told you, I wanted to relax! Arceus, do you never stop asking questions?" she yelled, giving him the impression that she was anything but relaxed. Realizing the absurdity of her lie, she couldn't help but choke, barely holding her tears back. Siria turned away from him, knowing that even glancing at the Umbreon would cause her to break down into absolute tears. She walked over to the opposite side of the tree and slumped against the coarse bark. It didn't take long for her to start sobbing softly, sad noise carried away by the cool wind flowing past her.
As she held her face in her hands, she hardly noticed another body, dark hide contrasting against her redness, sit down next to her. Shadrach opened his mouth to give her some words of reassurance, namely, "What's wrong?", but he then wisely remembered what had happened back in the dorm and reappraised not only his marginal list of comforting things to say but also his ability to calm women in general. I've dealt with shell-shocked guys before, but a girl? Of course, he was startled at the sudden cry the Latias besides him gave.
"Shadrach, I'm an idiot! I'm worthless! I've done so many stupid things that I can't even count them on my fingers!" The Umbreon remained silent at her ranting. "I killed three 'mon! Then I almost got raped! And after, I couldn't save the life of another because I was too weak and useless to know how to! Now I just showed my own brother that I'm the biggest jerk in the whole world!" Anguish renewed, she let out even more tears, rubbing her eyes as she laid out her penances for him to see.
He struggled with his inner voice that told him to mention that she had only listed four things and thus could count them with her fingers, but suppressed it with some effort. "What do you mean?" Shadrach asked with much discomfort, very conscious of how similar his question was to the one that Sirius had used. Fortunately, the Latias didn't rise up in anger, instead continuing to cry.
"I'm a murderer! I killed three Tamsus 'mon right there, in cold blood! They were defenseless, too! Just sitting there, eating and talking!"
This particular claim perked his interest. "Killed? Haven't you…." Shadrach paused, searching for a better euphemism. "Taken other targets down before?"
"I know I've killed them before, but this is different! The other ones I didn't even have to listen or talk to, and they all look the same too!"
"Different? How?"
She looked up at him, unashamed about how distraught she looked. "They're just like us," she whispered, mortified by the concept. "They were talking like friends, just like how we would on a regular night. They ate soup out of a bowl, as if they were sitting at a dinner table. They seemed so… civilized. Nothing like the barbarians we thought they were! The only difference between them and us is who we fight for! It doesn't matter which side dies; we're just killing ourselves by this!" Siria put her face in her hands again.
The Umbreon sighed and smiled, an action that seemed completely incongruent to the mood she had set. "So you finally see what I see, huh?" he said softly. The Latias looked up at him, surprised that he wasn't repulsed or disgusted by her analysis. "It's been a while since I've heard those words come out of my own mouth. Just tells you how disconnected I am from others." He let out a chortle, shaking his head. "Would you mind if I told you a story?" She nodded in reply.
"A few years ago, I was fresh out of boot camp, an honored Special Forces member, one of the four in the camp who were selected from the hundreds who applied. On our first mission, I was that guy, the fucking new guy in a group of five, so even with all of the training I got, the veterans didn't expect me to pull my weight. So anyways," he continued, a hint of nostalgia making its way into his voice. "Our mission was to take out several reinforced pillboxes on a ridge so that an infantry regiment taking the road below could pass without coming under fire." Siria gave him a confused look. "This was when Tamsus controlled more than a quarter of the country," he asserted, referencing the few years before when the militia was actually a powerful force. "Now they only hold a small part of the south, but I digress."
"So, our method of infiltration was air drop, like yesterday. Right off the bat, one of us gets himself caught in a tree, breaks an arm, and loses his pack on a branch. Not exactly the best morale booster, as you would imagine," he said, recognizing the somber look she gave him. "So now, even before operation, we have a casualty. That was fine, though; the mission was pretty simple. So we have five targets, listed out as Alpha, Bravo, Charlie, Delta, and Echo. Imaginative, huh? The process was really easy and really redundant: disable any guards guarding the entrance, toss two grenades in, and go in and clear the rest out."
"What we didn't know, though," he said, holding his paw up. "Each one of us only carried two frag grenades, and since one of our men lost his pack and our lead didn't really account for the ammo loss (even though he's a SF operative), we were at a loss as to what to do with the last pillbox. We couldn't just go in and attack Echo, since the 'mon inside had probably heard the explosions coming from the other four targets we destroyed. None of us had any attacks that would simply clean out a bunker, either. The only thing we had left was an incendiary grenade, just one so that we could destroy an artillery gun or another important asset if we found one. Of course, as the FNG, they made me hump the extra weight. So I suggested that we use the grenade, and the officer told me to throw it in. I regretted the idea as soon as I said it, but I didn't dare question his order, so I snuck to the side entrance, waiting for the go sign from one of the others." Siria simply sat, entranced by his story.
"So I crouch there waiting, and can't help but pick up what they're saying inside. They were talking about whether to surrender or fight their way out, wondering if it was worth their lives to fight against Special Forces troops. Then, as that Venusaur gave the go, I pulled the pin, and just as I'm about to toss, I hear some 'mon say, 'I really hope we make it to see the next day.'" The Latias gulped, knowing exactly what would happen next. Shadrach looked downwards, sighing as he said, "It was the worst thing I could hear before letting it go. And of course, there was the shout as they heard the clink, and then-" He shivered a bit, a quite uncustomary reaction of the normally calm 'mon. "The screams coming out of the pillbox sounded worse than the Banettes howling on Mount Pyre. I stood horrified as I watched flaming body after body run outside, only to get mowed down by a Nidoking standing in front with a rifle."
"Arceus," she breathed, completely forgetting about her own worries.
"It gets worse," he said in response. "After, we had to clear the room. We found one 'mon in the room, a Mightyena burnt to a crisp. He was holding a nearly toasted photo of his wife and kid. Even though I don't have a memory like yours, I can still see it as if I looked at it three seconds ago. He was standing proudly and tall, his mate was hugging him, and the kid stood up in front of both of them, waving at the camera. The realization of what I had just destroyed in itself was more than enough to mortify me, but then," Shadrach said, mask of utter disgust covering his face. "The Venusaur pissed on the corpse and proclaimed victory. It took me everything to not walk up to him and kill him right there. In fact, the Nidoking from before caught me by the scruff of my neck and told me to 'let go of it,' if you can believe that."
Siria had a revolted look on her face. "What a bastard. It must have been terrible…."
Shadrach nodded. "I spent several lengthy days with the chaplain after. I basically told him after screaming for an hour straight that the Halcyon Defense was bastardized in such a way that Giratina itself couldn't make it worse and that the military could shove it. Luckily, he stuck to the nondisclosure policy, so higher-ups have never known about the outburst, both to my pleasure and disappointment. The feeling wore off after the next few missions, though I don't know if that's a good or bad thing. Anyways, I guess my point is that you're not the only one with those feelings, so don't brood too much over it," he concluded.
"But how can you still go out there on missions and do what you do without regret or remorse? You know that we're just killing our own!" she exclaimed, obviously not convinced. We're murderers! All of us!"
Shadrach adjusted himself to face her better. "Siria, I hope you don't think I lack those feelings. Before I go to sleep after a mission, I always wonder about what I did wrong and what I could have done right, if there was a way to do it but with less casualties. It's unavoidable, though. This is war. 'mon are going to die on both sides, no matter what you do or what others do. And as Special Forces, we have to be the most up front about the business and see the worst of it all. But at the end, I find solace in the fact that I'm working to put an end to this conflict so that no more can die needlessly, so that there's no more killing or bloodshed. I just put faith in our higher ups-" He let out a derisive snort. "And hope that their orders are so that we can end the Tamsus insurgency and bring peace back again."
"So you're basically fighting for peace… isn't that like having sex for virginity?" She opted to substitute a more politically correct term for the usual curse.
He looked at the Latias' skepticism-ridden face. "How else are you going to do it? Should our ancestors have just dropped our arms for the country of Mirunas when they invaded centuries ago? How about when we had to intervene when Kanto declared independence from the other three states and started a war against them? It would be nice if we could solve everything through talking, but that only happens in a perfect world."
She sighed and looked out at the blackness of the night. "I guess if you put it that way…." Something still bugged her about his explanation, but she couldn't put her finger on it. Was it their being forced into fighting? The necessity of it all?
The Umbreon interrupted her thoughts. "Sorry if that didn't answer all of your questions. It certainly doesn't answer mine, but I doubt any explanation will. Anyways, Siria… would you care to tell me what happened last night?" She looked at him. "Of course, I'm perfectly fine if you don't want to," he quickly added, not wanting to spark her ire again.
"No, it's best if I get it out now," she replied, almost calm demeanor receding as the memories resurfaced. "I don't want to sit on it any longer than I have already. It's just going to be a burden." The dragon tried to keep her voice steady as she began to recite her story. "It all started with…."
By the end of her tale, Siria had lost whatever composure she had earlier, crying loudly. "And so- he just- he just died! Right there! The helo got there right when I lost him!" Shadrach glanced away, not knowing what he could say that would comfort her. Arceus, and he thought his experience was bad….
"That's not even the worst part! The worst part is, I couldn't do anything! If I was better, if I was useful, then… then…" she whispered, lowering her pitch. "Wyatt would be alive…." Then her voice rose to nearly a scream again. "I had not one, but two chances to save him! I had two Arceus-damn chances, and I couldn't use them because I'm useless! Because I'm not as good as Sirius is!"
Shadrach blinked in surprise at her mentioning the Latios. "As good as Sirius?" he repeated.
The Latias continued her rant. "He's everything that I'm not! He can actually fight! He can stow his mercy away and kill when he needs to! He can even heal people better than anyone I know! He does it even better than me, and I know Wish! If I was Sirius, I would have killed the Glaceon before going to help Wyatt! If I was Sirius, I would have been able to heal Wyatt so he wouldn't have died! If I was Sirius, I wouldn't have yelled at my sibling and ran away! If I was Sirius, we wouldn't even be having this discussion!" She punched the ground, not willing to show the Umbreon a futile Dragon Claw attempt. "He probably hates me," she mumbled, done screaming her lungs out. "I blamed him for something that was all my fault and even slapped him for it. Why should I go back? He's probably going to give me the cold shoulder and tell me to go away. I deserve it, too." Siria looked down at the ground, letting her tears fall to the grass.
"That's ridiculous. He wouldn't do that," the dark-type reassured her.
"What's so ridiculous about it? You would do the same if your sister did that to you, wouldn't you?"
He hummed. "I would consider it," he said, evoking a sense of hurt from the Latias. "But I would eventually forgive her. I have brothers, and we've had stuff like this happen between us before. Sure, it wasn't a result of having someone killed, but I can empathize." An flash of regret passed on his face as he remembered Kenneth. "Besides, I talked with Sirius before coming here. He's really sorry for what he did to you, and he's fully willing to apologize."
Siria looked at him, pain still in her eyes. "I'm the one who should be apologizing, not him…."
"Then you can tell him that when we go back."
"Shadrach, don't you get it? How can I meet him face to face after telling him all of those things? If I try, I'll probably just run away again, like before! Just because I'm so damn weak…." Her voice cracked as she uttered the last sentence.
The Umbreon looked humored. "Don't kid yourself. Siria, how do you think you got into Special Forces? Did they pick you because you're weak?"
"No…."
"Did they train you nearly twenty-four seven because they wanted to make you weaker?"
"No…."
"Do they send you to go on missions because you're weak?
"No…."
Shadrach smiled in triumph. "So what makes you think you're weak? Those are all the signs of a good soldier, something that the military severely lacks."
"It's not that!" she whined. "Everything may look good on paper, but how do I compare to other SF soldiers? Like my brother? Or Levina? They probably laugh at me behind my back. Maybe even you do! You're probably judging me right here because I'm spilling my guts out to you, thinking of telling me to stuff all of my feelings and get on with it! Who knows what goes on behind that stone face of yours?" With renewed anguish, she began to cry again.
"That's not true," he countered. "I can't really speak for Levina, but Sirius definitely wants you to get better. Doesn't he train you in his spare time? That's more than enough to show that he wants to help." The Latias looked up as he made the extremely simple but incredibly logical connection for her. "You also have skills that he doesn't, like psychic-based attacks and good stealth form. You may not be able to do some of the things he does, but it works both ways. Not to mention you're not a giant flirt and a pervert in general," he added, mentioning some of Sirius' less savory traits. "As for me, I think you're good at what you do! I told you before, I went through the exact same thing you are right now. It's certainly better to come out now than shove all of those feelings to the back of your head, just to have them make you a psychological wreck later on. Not to mention you're more than just a soldier to me." The Latias turned to look at him as an uncharacteristic warmth worked its way into his voice. "Siria, you're a very good friend, and I'd hate to see you go. I mean it." Shadrach truncated the other thing besides a friend he felt she was to him, figuring that now wasn't the best of times to bring it up.
His admission was more than enough to spark a sense of happiness in her eyes as she looked into his. "R-really?" she choked, lingering wisps of disbelief slowly leaving her voice.
"Yes, really." The Umbreon grinned at her. "You're not what you think you are. You're far better than that. Now, c'mon, get up." He extended a paw outwards to the sitting dragon. She looked at it hesitantly, as if her were tricking her. After a pause, she then took his offer, grasping it tightly. Shadrach pulled her up and she followed, her strong legs doing most of the work for him. The thing he didn't expect, though, was for Siria to let the kinetic energy carry her body right into his arms and rest her head against his chest. He stiffened at this first contact, rational side quite alarmed that a girl was so close to him (not to mention that he was most likely in violation of more than a few military policies), but honestly, he hardly cared in the end. Official policy be damned; there were more important things than that, like the Latias who was crying on him. Seeking to comfort her, he wrapped his arms around her back, instinctively feeling that it was the right thing to do.
"Shadrach. Th- thank you. You're a good friend. A very good friend," she reciprocated, sobbing out the words between hiccups. "Can you promise me something?"
"What is it?" he asked, half-filled with desire to fulfill her wish and half-filled with dread as he wondered if he would be able to deliver on it.
"Don't leave me."
"What?" He froze, subconsciously knowing exactly what the otherwise completely innocuous statement implied after hearing her tone of voice. The presence inside his head bristled at it, but the Umbreon shoved it down again.
She buried her head deeper into his chest. "Don't- don't leave me," she cried. Shadrach tensed up even more, all doubts of what she meant completely obliterated by the even more forceful request. A war raged behind his eyes, his innate rationality jousting against newfound emotion.
It makes no sense for you to have a relationship with her! What do you think this will do to future combat missions? You will be inextricably tied with her; her casualty will only drive you to do irrational things! And what happens if she gets killed? Think for a minute, please.
But what happens if you reject her? She'll become a shell again, desolate and insecure. That's far worse than having two competent and healthy soldiers working together. Hell, they'll even have near-perfect resonance and communications, something that commanders have consistently sought but failed to obtain!
Yes, but-
"I promise," the Umbreon murmured to her, cutting off any protest his rationale could raise. "I promise that I won't leave you." His body calmed, tensed muscles relaxing as he continued to hold her. Screw it. If this is how the chips fall, then so be it. He could virtually hear his logic sigh exasperatedly in disappointment, but he didn't care.
The two figures stood in embrace on the top of the hill under the rising moon, neither willing to let the other go.
After giving the knock the Lucario had shown him, Shadrach slowly pushed the wooden plank to the left, trying his best to be as quiet as possible. Poking his head out, he saw the familiar base, a bustling hive of work even at twenty-three hundred. There were no guards in sight, and any of the 'mon who were there were distracted with other tasks, such as a Floatzel preoccupied with machining a set of steel treads back onto a tank.
"It's clear, Siria. Go first," he told the Latias behind him. She nodded and wormed her way past him, thin frame eliminating whatever challenges that could have arisen from the task. Normally, she probably could have flown back in without being noticed, but after several mortar attacks from Tamsus soldiers from some distance away only a week ago, the forward operations base had stepped up its aerial surveillance and anti-air network. Breaking the invisible web was a perfect recipe for getting caught and court-martialed.
Shadrach could only make out a dark blue T-shirt and black track pants leaving the tunnel, assuring him that the chances of her being seen were slim as she activated her invisibility. He couldn't help but note that she had chosen auspiciously colored clothing. As the Umbreon heard the last of her scampering, he followed her up, sliding the plank back into its original configuration. He looked for a red body in the slightly busy entrance, but he found none… there! The same set of clothing making its way along a relatively obscure path back to their living quarters. It was a good plan; for some strange reason, Special Forces members were given different colored casual shirts than the normal light brown one, meaning that she would stick out in what seemed to be a sea of tan shirts and camouflage fatigues. Wearing a set of camo himself, Shadrach had a little less to fear as he began walking his way back to the dorm.
"Hey," a voice called behind him. He felt his blood run cold, wondering if he had been caught in the middle of his activities. After turning around, though, he only saw the same Lucario from before. "So, how did it go?" James asked.
"Excellently," the Umbeon replied, grinning at him.
He smiled back "Certainly seems like it. She seems like a nice gal, so treat her with respect. You hear?" The fighting-type's insight startled Shadrach for a minute as he forgot that not only did the Lucario have access to others' Aura but also that he was manning the guard tower at the time of their return.
"Five by five," he assured, standing at full attention and saluting.
He saluted back and chuckled. "Never had a fancy Special Forces member salute a regular Army 'mon like me before. Anyways, I think you'd better get going before the MPs start knocking. Sure, it's random, but it might be yours that they check. Good night…?" He paused, realizing that he'd never gotten a name.
"It's Shadrach. Sergeant Shadrach. Good night to you too, James."
The Lucario grimaced. "Good night by staying up there 'till oh-dark hundred hours, certainly. Don't let anyone hear I was complaining," he requested of the dark-type. "See you around, Shadrach." James climbed back up the ladder he descended from, grumbling about what sadist could have possibly put him on that shift.
Laughing in amusement, the Umbreon turned the other way, returning to his quarters and hoping fervently that inspections hadn't started yet.
As he approached his room, he saw a dragon sitting on the concrete steps before the door. A red and white dragon, to be specific.
"Siria?" he asked, recognizing her face.
She looked up at him, a slight tinge of red working its way into the white areas of her face. "Oh, Shadrach."
"What are you doing out here? Hopefully no MPs came by yet," the Umbreon said, glancing around.
"I was waiting for you, that's all."
"And now I'm here. Shall we go in together?" He walked up the steps, about to touch the knob….
"Wait!" the Latias called. She stood up behind him. The dark-type turned around, quizzical expression on his face. "I just…" she mumbled, so abashed and shy that she nearly forgot what she was going to say. "I just wanted to say thanks for earlier…."
Shadrach smiled at her. "No problem, Siria, that's what- mmmph!" He was interrupted mid-sentence when the dragon stood on her tip-toes and leaned in to plant a kiss on his muzzle. As he stood there stupidly, his eyes widened as he figured out what was happening. The Umbreon could swear that he was suffocating, but he didn't dare recoil; who knew what new fresh hell he could unleash from offending her? All he could do was return the favor, inexperienced at it as he was….
And just like that, it was done. As the Latias broke off the kiss, Shadrach quickly took a step back and straightened up, almost tripping over his own feet as he felt a sudden warmth run up his face. Siria was in a similar position, looking downwards as she blushed with sheer embarrassment. Neither of them dared to break the covenant of silence that hung in the air between them.
"Sorry!" the Latias suddenly exclaimed, ears nearly matching the color of her hide. "I-I don't know what got into me! Honest! I just thought that because you were my boyfr-" She nearly choked on her own words, realizing what she was about to say.
"No, it's fine!" an equally flustered Shadrach replied, trying to hide his incredible embarrassment. "I know what you mean!"
"Good! W-well," she stammered, still at a loss for words. "Good night!" And with that she dove past him for the door, opening and closing it with such speed that the Umbreon hardly saw more than a red blur. He simply stood there, nonplussed and utterly at a loss as to what had just occurred.
"Yo." An unfamiliar voice jarred his daydreaming. Looking to the side, he saw an Arcanine watching him. The first thing he thought was how probable it was that she had seen the two of them together. The second thing he thought was how long it would take him to get a general discharge.
"Yes?" he asked shakily, trying his best not to seem suspicious.
"Twenty-three hundred. Lights out for 'mon not on night patrol." The fire-type motioned towards her watch.
Turning to the door, he halted when he heard her say something else. "Oh, and also, try to keep it in your pants."
He was certain that if he were a Charizard, his tail flame would have set the entire building on fire. "Say what?" he yelped, expecting her to suddenly whip out a pair of handcuffs.
"You're lucky I had to raise three teens. Otherwise, I would probably be writing you up right now," she said, putting a paw to her face. Shadrach calmed a bit, though his body definitely didn't show it. "Although we're in the military and there's a 'no fraternization' policy (why they still implemented mixed gender living quarters in conjunction with it is beyond any understandable logic), I honestly don't see how they plan on stowing horny guys away for months at a time, so stuff like what you two did kind of slides." The Umbreon thought that his face would catch on fire from embarrassment as she implied something that hadn't even crossed his mind. "I've seen this happen more times than I needed to. So, for the sake of your job and mine, please don't try to screw her in the middle of the night. It would make both of our lives far more stressful if you did. You two get kicked out for misconduct, I have to write reports and get grilled for not picking up on it earlier, etcetera, etcetera. Got it?"
"I wouldn't do that!" Shadrach contended, mortified at the suggestion of him doing… that to her. Hell, he didn't even know he was in an actual relationship until a few minutes ago!
She snorted. "Yeah, that's what they all say. Just wait for a few weeks. I told you, I have three kids! Anyways, lights out, stay in your own bed. Ok?"
Both shocked and dazed, the Umbreon only nodded his head in response to her admonishment.
"Good night," the Arcanine cheerfully told him as if nothing had transpired between them. She left the front of their housing unit, waving a flashlight in front of her and continuing her nightly rounds. Shadrach, mouth agape, watched her round the corner and disappear from sight. He didn't stand staring there, for the door opened again. The Umbreon nearly jumped, expecting Siria to approach him again.
"Hey, are you just going to stand out there all night?" Levina asked, crossing her arms and leaning against the metal doorframe. "Get back in here, it's o dark o'clock." As Shadrach passed her, she couldn't help but comment, "Why is your face so red?"
"No reason," he mumbled, facing downwards so that she couldn't get a second look.
She hummed. "If I remember correctly, Siria came through here a few minutes ago and ran straight into the bathroom. I wonder…" the Ampharos mused in mock confusion.
He sighed and rolled his eyes at her. "Don't go there, please."
"Oh, I get it! Could there be something between you and-"
"Please?"
She huffed, slightly disgruntled that he had shot her down so quickly. "Fine, fine. I'll stop because tonight's an unusual night. And in more ways than one…." Her voice lilted.
"Levina," the Umbreon said a little more firmly this time. The electric-type fell quiet, knowing that she was quite close to bringing out his bad side. "Anyways, what happened to Sirius?" He looked at the slumbering dragon on the cot.
"Oh, him? Well, we talked a little bit, and I managed to get him out of his depressive spin! Although I don't know if it'll come back tomorrow morning…." She also glanced at him with concern. "Actually," she confessed, vibrant tone going down a few notches "He's actually a decent 'mon under all of that perviness and flirting crap."
"How so?"
Levina looked back at the Umbreon. "Well, I could just tell you, but don't you think it'd be better for him to show? Actions certainly do speak louder than words."
Shadrach nodded. "True, true." He watched as the Ampharos clambered up the top bunk, opening a small-screened DVD player. "Really, Levina? It's lights out."
She snorted. "Pft, as if they actually care about what we do after then. It's not the first time I did this. Technically we're free to do whatever whenever; you of all people know that it's more of a suggestion than anything else. Now c'mon, what movie do you want to see? I didn't even get to watch one tonight because of that crazy Latios." Levina motioned towards Sirius.
"I'm tired as is. I'll probably just change out and shower tomorrow morning." The Ampharos wrinkled her nose at him. "It's only because Siria's in there right now, I swear!"
"There's a problem going in after her?"
"All of the hot water's gone."
She looked up from the bright screen, amused by his response. "All of the showers are constantly heated. No way in hell that excuse will work on me. Now, come on, tell me! Or do I have to guess? I promise I'll make them good." The electric-type grinned widely at him.
Having changed out of his fatigues when she wasn't looking, Shadrach now wore a shirt and a pair of shorts. "Arceus, Levina, you're getting as bad as Sirius, and that's saying something," he groaned, getting into the bed under hers.
"No, that's not possible," she responded. "If I was as bad as Sirius I would be making cracks as to how much money I would be getting from bets because you two hooked up far later than anyone else expected."
"You what?" Shadrach exclaimed, blood rushing to his face once more.
"Kidding, kidding! Of course Mr. Serious wouldn't catch the sarcasm," Levina said in an airy voice. "Though I really wouldn't put it past him to do something like that…." She put on a pair of headphones as she put a disc in the DVD player, knowing how valuable sleep was to many Special Forces 'mon.
The Umbreon turned to face the wall, pulling the sheets up to his chest and grumbling. "Good night, Levina."
"Night."
As the Ampharos' full-feature movie began, Shadrach laid still on his side, reflecting on the events of the night. So he caught up with her after a ton of walking and told her a little bit of his history to calm her down. Then Siria told hers in turn and cried, starting what he assumed to be a relationship. Then they snuck back on base, and then when he returned to the dorm she stood up when he was talking and…. He flushed as he remembered the kiss the Latias gave him. The rationale behind it was completely illogical, but it felt so… right to him.
Absolutely tired from the day's events, he fell asleep before he could further evaluate his feelings for her, promising to himself that he would deal with it in the morning.
For those of you who hate this wishy-washy stuff, I swear we're almost done with it! Thanks for reading, and reviews haven't hurt anyone (physically) ...yet. Also for those physics pedants out there, I know that Siria's "deceleration" in the beginning of the chapter is technically just an equally rapid acceleration in an opposite direction, so there :P