Chapter 16 – Sorry seems to be the hardest word

"You still suck at sneaking around, even after all these years", she heard him say, and she was taken aback. He knew. He knew she was there. He had seen her.
"Damon…" she said, coming clear in front of him.

"I thought I told you to stay away Elena."

"And I thought you knew after all this time I never listened to your orders Damon." Elena accentuated the word order, looking at Damon right into his blue eyes. She had to fight hard not to let herself be absorbed by them. She knew she had to hold her ground, Damon would be Damon and he would not give her an easy time. But she was determined to get her family back and to put all those pieces together. It was time to mend what she had broken, what they had broken.

"What do you want?" was all Damon replied as drily as he could. He was having an inner battle against himself. He was keen on keeping the icy outside to the woman in front of him while his heart and body was screaming to him to go and just kiss the hell out of her. There she was, in front of him, in real. He had hoped for that moment for weeks until he had finally started to accept the idea that she probably would never come back. Yet, there she was, as fierce as ever, just like before all things fell apart. She was the Elena he had married. And he was having a hard time resisting her.
But he would not cave in. She had hurt him and the thought of all those nights he waited by the phone but she never called, all the time he had to soothe their crying children because they wanted a mother that would never come, all the times he had begged Bonnie to tell him where she was but all he got was "She finally came to her senses Damon. She deserves better than you, and she finally knows it." He had to live with the pity looks he received from people who knew what had happened every time he would walk on the streets. No, Elena had broken him and he would be crazy if he would just let her walk back again.
"I want our family back, that's all I want." He heard her say.

"Yeah…Too bad, we've moved on dear Wife." He added sarcastically.
His tone sent shivers through her spine. His words sting like knives but she refused to let his anger discourage her. She knew Damon Salvatore and he would always be rude and seek to hurt when he was angry. And damn right he was angry.
"You being all your sarcastic self is not helping Damon. I am trying here, okay. I am. I know I have messed up things by just walking away like some thief, but I am sorry. But at least I am acknowledging my mistakes here! While you're acting all hurt and innocent here!" Elena said, a bit louder than she intended.
She could see that Damon was getting all worked up by the seconds. This was not going the way she thought it would.
"ACTING ALL HURT? Excuse me Elena. SORRY FOR BEING ANGRY AND FOR NOT WANTING YOU AROUND. I AM SORRY THAT YOU DID NOT EVEN GAVE US A SECOND CHANCE TO TRY TO MAKE THINGS BETTER. Blame it ALL on me! You walk out the door; you leave us all, the kids Elena. YOUR KIDS! You just left! So yes, I know I have a big part in our marriage falling apart but leaving was YOUR decision. Just like not calling was. You didn't care. You didn't worry. I am surprise you even remember the way to this house! So YES I am going to ACT all hurt here as much as I want!" Damon was now practically shouting.

"I love you" was all Elena managed to say. She could feel the tears threatening to fall, though she was trying hard to hold them back. She had seen him angry before but the look in his eyes when he looked at her now just hurt.
She could see the hurt she had caused him and it made her heart ache. She wanted to tell him, explain to him why. She wanted to tell him that the past weeks away from him, from them, was the most horrible time of her life. That all she had wanted was to come back to them but she was so ashamed and scared. She had missed him so much and had spent long nights crying thinking about him, dreaming of being in his arms.
"It's too late for that now Elena. You ended all when you walked away." Damon uttered, trying not to show her the extent to which those three words she spoke had affected him. "Now, if you'll excuse me, I have to spend the day with my children, you know, the ones you abandoned." Damon added, knowing that it was a low blow using the kids like that against her.
He walked past her, "Goodbye Elena."

She watched the man that could hold her world together as much as shatter it drive away from her.
"This is far from goodbye Damon", she whispered as she watched his car disappear.
As Elena got into her car, she knew it was high time to confront her. She drove directly there and lost no time in walking up to her door and banging hard on it.
Soon enough, she heard her grumbled an "I'm coming. Don't break the door".
As the door open, Elena looked at her with clearly angry, questioning eyes. Her voice was firm and border dangerous.
"You lied. You said he did not want to hear from me again. That he had moved on. You owe me an explanation Bonnie."