Sheridens story

I could hear voices. But my eyes wouldn't open to let me see anything. Nothing would move. I felt like I was in a dream.

The voices came and went. One of them I knew.
James... it was James. My beautiful boyfriend. He sounded sad. Why was he so sad. I couldnt remember. My dream wouldn't let me remember.

I must of fallen to sleep again. But I woke up this time able to open my eyes.

I could see James. He was sat with his head on the side of my bed.
He didn't see me. I tried to move my hand that he was holding but it wouldn't move. I could feel James' hand.
Why couldn't I move? What had happened to me?

I was too tired to get scared about it. I just accepted it.
Sleep took me away again.

The next time I woke up. I could open my eyes and I could move my fingers. I tried to talk but nothing would come out.

"Sheriden?" Came my beautiful James' voice.

I tried to smile at him but I'm not sure if my face moved.

"Sheri... can you hear me baby?"
I moved my fingers. James smiled at me.
He pressed a button and a nurse came in.

"Hello sheriden" she sounded so loud, she may have well of shouted at me.

"Sheriden do you know where you are?" My eyes moved from her to James to the surroundings of where I lay.

"Your in intensive care at hospital sheriden" she smiled at me.

"James is here, he has been taking good care of you." I looked at James he smiled at me but he had tears in his eyes.

She turned to look at all the monitors I was hooked up to and spoke to James.
"Her stats look good. She is on her way out of it" the nurse said.
"Why can't she speak?" James asked. His voice shook.
" its normal that she will gradually come out of the coma. The fact she is responding to us is good news James. She understood what I said and looked around the room. That tells us her brain is still functioning very well"

"So she will make a full recovery?"

"Most young people that overdose and end up in a coma do make a full recovery. The chances are in her favour. She just needs time" she smiled at James again and picked a folder up at the end of my bed and left the room.

"Did you hear that Sheri, she said your going to be just fine. Then we can go home and put all this behind us" James tears over flowed his eyes.

I heard the word overdose. Surely that's not me she was talking about.
My memory wouldn't work.
Again the sleepyness took me under.

The next time I woke up. I couldn't see James. There was no one in the room but me. I moved my head to the side. It felt stiff.
The room was filled with so many cards and flowers. Even a balloon bobbed about.

The door opened and a familiar face poked his head through.
"Hello princess" he said.

"Logie" my voice cracked out. And a smile I could feel on my face.

Logan walked over to me and kissed me on my cheek.

"Your talking! That's brilliant! James will be annoyed he missed this"

"Where is James" my voice rasped out.

"He will be back in a little while. He has gone home for a shower that's all princess". Logan smiled a beautiful smile at me. His brown eyes gave me reassurance. Where as James' had looked scared for me.

"Logan what happened to me?"

"Let's not worry about that just yet. How are you feeling?" He changed the subject.

I looked him over with my blue eyes. What wasn't he telling me.

" is Carlos and kendall here too?"

"Carlos has been in and out all the time. He has been singing to you too" he laughed softly.

"And Kendall?" I reminded.

Logan looked away from me.
"No... no he hasn't"

"Logan what is it? What happened. Is kendall okay?"

"Look let's just wait for James then we can talk everything over" Logan flashed me a fake smile.

I tried to sit up. But I couldnt.

"Take it easy sheriden" Logan soothed.

"Tell me why. What happened to me. What's happened to kendall?" One of my machines began to beep at me and a nurse came in.

"Sheriden I need you to calm down" the nurse told me. Another nurse came in. My heart rate felt insane. Like it was going to pop out my chest.

I saw Logan get moved to the back of the room.

Then everything just faded away.

"Sheriden?... sheriden?" Was the soft words I got woken up by.

It was James.
I opened my eyes.
"James" my voice was a whisper.

"Hey baby girl" he replied.
"Your talking. That's great!" He beamed at me.

I tried to lift my hand up. But couldn't quite manage it.

"Logan said you got a bit angry at him" again James gave me an amazing smile as he held the hand I tried to lift.

"He wouldn't tell me what had happened to me and kendall?" My lips cracked as I spoke. They felt dry.

"Kendalls fine baby. He is here see!"

I looked over the other side of the bed. Kendall stood there. He looked awful. He had a black eye. It didn't look as if he had slept for a year.

I was confused. What had happened to him... what had happened to me.

"James whats wrong with me?" I felt scared.

"Kendalls going to fill you in Sheri" James said. He eyed kendall in a vicious way.

I looked at kendall. His clear green eyes looked almost transparent .

"Sheriden. You... you have just come out of a coma. It's been 3 days since you came in here. You overdosed on heroin. I'm not sure why... You got scared because it came out about the baby." Kendall held my other hand with both of his.

I lay in the bed and the memories started coming back. The baby and kacey. Kendall on top of paisley. All the crying I did. And injecting the heroin.

"I'm so sorry" I said. Tears ran down my face.

"Sheriden it wasn't your fault. It was mine. I handed an ex user heroin. That was stupid. I could of killed you". Kendalls voice was so low and sad. But his tone sounded rehersed, like a line from a show. Like he had planned what to say.
It wasn't him.

I looked at James
"It's not his fault. It's not and I won't have you blame him" James didn't say a word.

"I've got to go now sheriden" kendall kissed me on the head.

He walked to the door
"I love you. I'm sorry" he added, as I watched him leave the room I saw him fall in to paisley petrellis' arms sobbing.

The door closed.

"James what have I done?" I wiped my face.

"You just need to get better sheriden" he rested his head on my arm.

"I love you so much" he added.

"I love you too" I patted down his hair with my other hand as his head rested on my arm.

As I became more with it. More things came back to me.
James filled me in on gaps, like kacey being proven a liar because kendall spoke the truth on tv.
James was told I should be home in no time if I carried on the way I was.
He told me, not asked that once on my feet I was going to some doctor that would help straighten my head out with jay, and the baby.

James told me things with kendall will straighten out. But big time rush may not have a future.
My heart sank to my stomach at those words.
But again tiredness swept me away.

The next morning I felt a lot more like me.I could sit up but was a bit shaky on my legs.
My blood pressure had returned to almost normal.
The doctors were pleased enough that I would be allowed home soon.

The thought of going back there filled me with dread. I didn't want to go back.

"What's up Sheri" James asked as I got given the all clear.

"I can't do it. I can't go back there" I shook my head.

James carefully nudged me up on my hospital bed and sat next to me. He lifted his feet up and put his arm around me.

"Sheriden"he drew the word out.
"James?" I replied.

"If you don't want to go home. You can stay at my house... I was thinking maybe we could make it a permenant thing?"

"You want us to move in together?" My voice sounded more sceptical than I meant it to.

"Yeah... I thought we could give it a go. If you dont want to that's still cool. We can do what feels best for you".

"James I would love to move in with you"

"But?" James asked with a frown.

"No buts. I love you James.I'm sorry for being so selfish and ending up in here. I'm so sorry"

"I love you too. Don't be sorry. It wasn't your fault" James smiled his. amazing smile at me.