A/N: I haven't posted in a long time. I've been so busy its insane with exams and study but here's the next chapter. Hope it runs smoothly with no spelling mistakes! Sorry, still no season two characters yet but they're coming.

Also i'm wondering, do you think these chapters are too long? I don't know if people like to read short ones or whatever...

Please read and review. It means a lot. :-)

Lindsay.

I assume it's morning now. My minds been running with thoughts all night. I know I'm going to pay the price of not sleeping later on but for now, never mind. I sit up and raise myself off the couch in attempt to stretch out my aching body. Even if my mind wasn't on overload last night I wouldn't have been able to sleep with Emily's knee in my back. It really isn't a big couch even for one person. Me and my stupid pride. I should have just slept with Damian. I was dying to join him all through out the night. I just feel way too guilty to even look at him. I've been such a bitch to him these last few weeks and I continue to act like he's the one in the wrong. He should be the one angry at me. I'm surprised he even asked me if I wanted to share his bed last night. I didn't reply to him. I just stormed off in my diva way. I just can't think clearly with that redhead in the room. My thoughts cloud up with jealousy and I act out against everyone else. Yes, I finally admit it. I'm jealous of the girl. Why wouldn't I be? She's tall, slender, drop dead gorgeous but she also has that rebel side that the boys can relate too. If I were Damian I'd probably be kissing the ground at her feet. It's not like he isn't though. I sigh, and crack my fingers out roughly. I make my way over to the kitchen and turn on the side lamp. Everyone's still asleep and I don't feel like waking people up for company today. I start up my usual routine of preparing breakfast for everyone. I take out seven plates from the bottom drawer. Making breakfast for everyone is a good start to apologizing. To Damian, that is. I don't think I owe the Redhead an apology, as she was being just as rude to me as I was to her. It's going to be awkward saying goodbye to them when they leave though. I think I'll pretend to go dry the washing when they do. I just really don't want to see Damian giving her a hug goodbye. She'll just smirk at me from behind his back and maybe even suggest she stay another night. Ugh, the only reason she annoys me so much (apart from the obvious jealous thing) is because she patronizes me. I know I'm young but I'm not stupid. I can see it now; she'll treat me like a little schoolgirl with a crush on the teacher. Damian and I aren't that far apart in age. It's the end of the world anyway. All sorts of people get together when the Earth is ceasing to exist. I have to remind myself that it's not all up to me though. It's up to Damian too. There are two people in a relationship not one and I don't think he likes me the way I like him. Even if the new sexy redhead wasn't here to steal his attention I don't think he'd date me anyway. I embarrass myself all the time giving him massive hints that I want to get it on and he just acts like he doesn't even notice. How can he not notice when it's obvious to everyone? I think he's not man enough to let me down like a decent person would. So instead he acts like some cute oblivious kid. But really, the fact is I don't care if he keeps me hanging on; I just want to be with him - all the time. My hormones are seriously running like crazy in this house. Sure I've had the odd boyfriend in the past but they were just stupid sixteen-year-old relationships that never last. I was never, ever tempted to go all the way with any of them but for some reason every time I see Damian I can't help but fantasize about what's under his clothes. Although I now know he doesn't like me, I really did think I was making some progress with him. I mean, he let's me sleep in his bed and sometimes I even feel like he's flirting with me. Especially when I'm cooking. But with all this difficulty I've been giving him about the redhead and Samuel I'm probably back to square one. Sometimes I feel like a little girl tying to win over her dreams. But unlike all those stupid chick-flicks I'm not going to get my happy ending. But maybe I can, at the very least have a friendship with him and I'll start by apologizing. Then sneakily getting the redhead out of my house without seeming too brassy. She still annoys me to no end.

Somebody starts to cough over by the beds. Someone's probably going to get up and interrupt my quiet time. Unless it's Damian, then it's fine. I listen intently at the few grunts and the crunching of dried out sheets. I turn back to the bench and scrub it down waiting for Damian to grab my shoulder; like always.

"You're the only one up?" A mellow voice says directly behind me. I jump startled by the change in what I thought was Damian's voice. I turn around and stare into the droopy face of Bryce. Does he always have to look so depressed? He's like bloody eeyore.

"Yes," I say bitterly. "I was having some peace and quiet actually."

"Oh, I apologize," Bryce, drones in a voice that obviously isn't sorry at all. He drags a chair over to the kitchen bench. It squeaks across the ground painfully. He sits down and rests his elbows on the bench and watches me intently.

"Did you want something?" I pout. Bryce likes to get on my nerves for the sake of it.

"Just wondering what the maid is cooking today," he smiles cheerfully, only to piss me off though. I turn around and scrub the bench menacingly, picturing Bryce's face and the redheads face under the brush.

"Nothing for you, that's for sure," I retort. Bryce scoffs and laughs a little. Just to annoy me again I presume. Trying to ignore the thought of Bryce watching me I dug into the cupboard for whatever food we had. I checked for my homemade bread; none there. I checked for regular bread; none there. A little panicky I looked for basic cereal and none was there. I turn to Bryce and eye him suspiciously.

"What, no food?" he says in mock surprise.

"You took it," I say blankly, not as a question, as an accusation.

He doesn't move a muscle as he glares back at me, "You're the one that went on the raid. Did you even bring any food back?"

Oh shit. We left the food sprayed all over the ground back in town. Well really, it's not our fault we were being circled by a heard of zombies.

"No we didn't. The zombies were just a tad distracting."

Bryce smirks and mumbles something under his breath. He is such a little brat.

"What was that?"

Bryce looks up and speaks each word so clearly it's like he's talking to a three-year-old, "If - I - was - allowed - to - go - we - would - have - food."

I lean my head back with a bitter laugh, "Please! You'd be too wasted to even pick up a box!"

Bryce suddenly stands up so his whole body is right up against mine. He glares down at me our nosing almost touching. "When are you going to let that go, Lindsay?!" he says in a semi-loud voice. He was still keeping a conscious effort to not wake up the others.

"I'll let it go when you prove you can leave the house without needing to take a tequila shot!" I too was on the verge of yelling, but I kept it at a civil point.

"Why do you have to keep butting heads with me? I'm not trying to hurt anyone, am I?" he spoke more quietly, with each word he spitted through his teeth.

"You obviously don't know the definition of the word then! Because in my eyes that's exactly what you're doing."

Bryce growls furiously, "There! You just said it yourself! In your eyes; that's only because your too obsessed with your baby crush on Damian to see anything bad in him so you just dump it on Bryce because, hey! he won't mind!"

I'd had enough of his bullshit right then, "Why are you even here Bryce? Huh? Nobody wants you, not even Emily!" My screams start to wake a few people up. There was a lot of ruffling coming from the beds and the odd awkward cough.

"Get over your jealous little self."

Damian poked his head over the couch, confused. He saw Bryce and I square to square with each other and cautiously got out of bed. "Just grow up Lindsay! We're in a zombie, fucking, apocalypse nobody has time for your games!"

Damian quickly ran over to us as I took another step closer, "Little wank-"

Damian pushes us far apart with two hands, like in the movies when breaking up a fight, "Guys cool down! Take a step back and chill for a moment!"

I step back slightly, breathing heavily. I was supposed to be impressing Damian with my maturity but the words spilled out of me like acid, "You might as well leave Bryce, we seriously don't want you!"

Bryce looks down crest-fallen. I'd crossed the line. Ashamed, I quickly sprint out of the room. I didn't want hear the redhead laugh at me, I didn't want to hear Bryce complain about me being a bitch. I didn't want to see Damian nod in agreement with a little crease between his eyebrows as he thought of what to do with me. I slam the door behind me probably waking everyone up but I don't care anymore. They'll hear the news eventually. Bryce would only be too keen to tell them all about evil Lindsay. I just want to run away so I'll never have to see them again. I keep acting so awfully and I can't help myself. It's like some sort of tourette's when instead of swearing I just lay insults over everybody. Tears streak down my face as I half stumble, half run down the dark corridor. It becomes hard to breathe choking on my tears so I slow down to a walk. Through everything horrible I've said I can't help but wonder, selfishly if Damian will come check on me. I listen for the open of the door back down the corridor but the only sound is the patter of my feet on the concrete. Of course he's not coming for me. I was right all along! He doesn't like me! He just try's to put up with me like I'm his... sister. The awful word sinks in on me and I crumble to the floor. When did I become so pathetic? I used to be strong. I used to be able to face anything, no matter what. Why have I become a crumbling mess? I've been through so much and I've toughed it all out not ever forgetting who I really was and who I wanted to be. And this sad, pathetic little girl is not the person I wanted to be. Is it this new family of mine that's made me so weak and fragile? I've never felt so united and needed before. Maybe I was letting it go to my head? I pulled my body off the ground and sat myself up with my back against the wall, legs out in front of me. I didn't want to be this girl. I don't know how I let it get this out of hand but it's going to change. I'm not going to let the redhead boss me around, I'm not going to let my love for Damian blind me and I'm definitely not going to let anyone stand all over me like a child. I sniffle and whip the remaining tears away from my eyes. I take a long breath preparing myself for the awkward battle in front of me. I was going to apologize to them all; despite the embarrassment it will bring me. It's what a strong, mature woman would do. I begin to stand up when I notice a figure waking towards me. Shocked, I drop back down to the ground onto my arse. The figure is short but stocky. I force the flutter of butterflies out of my stomach and watch silently as Damian takes a seat opposite me, his back also against the wall. He watches me, his face contorted in grief and defiance.

I speak first, "Damian, you don't have to say anything. I am sorry."

He sighs, in obvious relief. "Lindsay I didn't realize you objected-"

"I've been stupid. I see that now. I want to apologize to everyone," I smile encouragingly, trying to convince him that this is what I really want.

"Lindsay, I really had no clue why you seemed to dislike Marissa so much. I guess now that I think back to it, I have been really stupid-"

"Seriously Damian, I don't hate - Marissa -" I try to say the name without letting my distaste seep through. "I just don't like the gun. My family brought me up against all weaponry things." Lies.

Damian smiles slowly before speaking, "Was it really just the gun, Lindsay? Or was there another reason you didn't like her?"

I scoff, "Of course what other reason..." My voice goes quiet as I see the look on his face. He knows.

"Lindsay, you should know, I never liked-"

I cut him off to save myself the embarrassment. "I'm going to change, Damian. I know I've been such a bitch lately and I hate it. I don't want to jeopardize the family we have going on. I want to stay, together - as a family," I smile the best I can.

He nods solemnly, "As safe as you may feel here Lindsay we are still in a zombie apocalypse and it's a dangerous place. We lose people, we gain people. This isn't the time or place to start a relationship. It would never end the way you'd want it too."

"There is nothing I want from you Damian."

"If we were in any other place or in any other situation-"

"I just want to keep living the way we're living."

Damian grimaces, "Lindsay, I want you to know it's not that I don't love you-"

I panic and rush my words out, spitting slightly, "I love you too, Damo. You're the closest thing to family I've had." I put empathize on family.

He reaches out his hand to me but thinks better of it and starts to fiddle with his jacket zip, "I never meant to hurt you either. If I'd known what you were thinking I wouldn't have let it... Well it's just-" Damian's cheeks flush red. With a rush of relief, I realize he's just as embarrassed as me. He can't finish his sentences. But that could also be my fault for cutting him off all the time.

"You've never hurt me, Damian. I'm fine and all I want is for things to go back to normal with us. With everyone." Thank God I'm a good liar.

"Lindsay I promise you-"

"The only promise I want from you Damian is your promise to keep us all safe."

"With all my heart."

"That's all I ask," I get to my feet. I quickly peck Damian on the cheek and make my way back down the dark corridor. I don't wait for him to follow, but the silence indicates he's still sitting where I left him. I try to muster all my strength to hold the tears back. Did I really have to apologize now? I've already faced enough embarrassment. But I might as well get it all out of the way now, I reminded myself. I lift my head high and walk through the door; it was partially open. They better not have been eavesdropping. I quickly scan the room to see who is awake. The answer: everyone. The group sits together spread over the two couches. Each pair of eyes stare straight at me, all in different shades.

Emily eyes me suspiciously; eager to hear what's going on. Cameron's are creased with worry; he's probably wondering where Damian is. Bryce glares at me, obviously a simple sorry isn't going to sit with him. Samuel looks at me with mild curiosity and next to him the redhead is trying her hardest not to smirk. The back of my throat starts to itch with a growl but I push the feeling down, that person is not me anymore. It never was me. I just got a little lost along the way. I march forward confidently till I stand in front of crowd. Their eyes follow me the whole way as they wait patiently for me to speak.

I take a deep breath, "Sorry guys. Seriously," I let out a nervous laugh. "I really am sorry. Emily, I'm sorry I dragged you into this mess. Cameron, I'm sorry for tearing you in two. Samuel, sorry for being so cold. Marissa, I'm sorry." I stop to take in another breath. "Bryce, I'm just so sorry. I don't know why but I always take my anger out on you and... Well... I'm going to change."

No one speaks but they all continue to look at me, like they are expecting more.

"I don't know what else to tell you. I'm just going to change." I look around at them, hoping to see some light change in their expressions.

Nobody speaks, nobody wants to go first. Awkwardly Samuel speaks up, "We'll be gone in a few days so it's alright with me," he smiles but it's obvious his mind is on other things. He never really cared for my petty drama in the first place.

Bryce takes a breath and cocks his head, "Makes no difference to me, Linds. In my eyes, you're not gonna change and that's just the way it is. So I'm going to go on a raid now, ya see, we have no food. Shame, ain't it? Try not to start a cat fight while I'm away yeah?" Bryce mimics my cold humorless laugh from before and then struts out of the room. The redhead squirms in her chair, like she's itching to make a snarky comment. Surprisingly she resists the urge and leaves the room following behind Bryce. Samuel, who seems to never be able to let the Redhead be alone, marches after her seconds later. I look back at the others hoping their reaction will be more hopeful.

Cameron stands up and embraces me in a tight hug, "Good to have you back." He smiles down at me genuinely but then also turns and leaves the room. So did nobody really accept my apology? Why did they all leave? I'm guessing they just don't want more drama - from me. I look back over at Emily. My last hope. If she doesn't forgive me I don't think I'll be able to live. Her eyes a wide open looking straight at me. Cautiously, I sit down beside her, bracing myself for her reaction.

She starts giggling and slaps her hand across her thigh, "Guurl, we've never had so much drama!"

Cameron.

Samuel is acting so nonchalant. He's trying to act like I never saw Marissa having a melt down last night at all. I know what I saw. And what did he mean by, "nothing"? Of course there was something! I just can't stop thinking about it. Has he talked to Marissa about it? Did he only act so chill about it because it happens every night? Is Marissa secretly just a drama queen? I can't see that to be true. Maybe Lindsay's name calling really got to her? I can't see that being true either. This is bothering me more than it should. I'm trying to be helpful for Damian but my eyes keep drifting to the redhead. She's smiling and laughing, talking intently to Bryce and Samuel. Is she not even embarrassed about what happened?

"Cameron!" Damian's fingers snap in front of my face pulling me away from my thoughts. I step back startled. I blink furiously and look back at Damian.

"Sorry," I whisper, urging myself to forget about last night.

"Are you even listening?" he smiles slightly as he kicks up dirt in the ground.

I think back to our conversation and take a stab in the dark, "Yes I was. You were saying that Lindsay is delicate and we are too mean."

Damian barks a laugh, "Not quite. But on that subject, I don't think she really is delicate. I think she's stronger than we now."

"Lindsay? I don't know..." I say while still staring straight at Marissa. She's teasing Samuel.

Damian, oblivious that my mind is on other things, continues, "Think about it, how much do we know about her past? She must have been alone for a long time before you found her."

"And when I did, the first thing she did was ball her eyes out and plead at my feet," I say jokingly.

Damian tuts, thinking hard, "Well maybe she'd been fighting so hard she was tired? Maybe she was waiting for somebody to pick her up so she wouldn't have to fight alone anymore..."

Cameron smiles. Damian cares for Lindsay. That much was obvious. But it's almost a weird affection he has for her. I don't quite understand it and I don't think he does either. "I think you're over analyzing it too much. Maybe she was cornered by zombies, thought she was going to die and was eternally grateful when she didn't."

"Maybe," Damian mutters. He pats me on the back and walks forward. Although Samuel and Marissa are here, Damian can't help himself but take lead. He slowly marks the front of the line, Bryce right behind him. I walk at the back alone, giving myself some thinking time. We are relatively safe here. Zombies rarely come on the open field. There isn't food out here usually because we hardly ever cross this field and I'm pretty sure we are the only humans left in town. It's only because we're going on a big, foot raid. Well, it's not like we don't always go on foot raids. We don't have a car so we just call it a normal raid. But that's what Samuel keeps calling it.

My mind drifts back to last night, again. For the millionth time. It has seriously become an obsession. I need to know why she was crying. It's none of my business but it's so out of character that I can't help but be extremely curious. In front Samuel starts to slowly drift to the left, as the sun gets hotter. We all start to slow down a little, puffing and sweating. Bryce even pulls off his shirt. I take advantage of the separation between Marissa and Samuel and stalk forward. I march quietly so I don't give her a fright with my intensity.

I slow down so my walking is in sync with hers, "Hey." I can't help but cringe at how awkward I sound.

She turns towards me in shock. "Hey," she says slowly.

I search my brain for something to say. I saw the only stupid thing I can think of, "So, we don't usually have that much drama at home."

She doesn't make any motion but keeps walking straight forward, "Sorry. That's probably my fault." Her voice is stiff. Maybe she doesn't like me because she knows I don't like her?

"Nah," I say with a wave of my hand. "Damian too. She has a crush on him and he didn't know."

Out of the corner of my eye I see her nod, "Yeah, I noticed."

"Everyone did."

We go silent, again. I can't think of anything to say and neither can she. Or maybe she doesn't want to talk to me. Either way the awkward silence continues on. I look across at her but she's still staring straight forward. Not a muscle moves in her face. Her eyes are tight not drifting from the field in front of her. Behind her Samuel stares straight at me. He shakes his head slowly his eyes open wide. I turn back slowly, surprised. Was he asking me not to talk to her? I quickly jump right to it before he can interrupt.

"Marissa?" I ask.

She jumps in surprise and looks at me confused. Had I ever addressed her by name before?

"Yeah?" she says back, now looking at me.

I take a breath, "Are you okay?"

She scrunches her eyebrows together, "yes."

"Last night? We're you okay last night?"

She nods slowly, without taking her eyes off me, "Yes. Do you mean the Lindsay thing?"

"No. When you went to sleep. Were you okay?" I turn away from her gaze. Her eyes are intoxicating. Frightening but addictive at the same time.

"Yes, I don't understand what you mean?"

My face is drawn back to hers. She looks seriously worried now. But completely confused. Does she really have no idea what I'm talking about?

"Last night I saw you. You looked like you'd been-"

"Cameron!" Samuel barks, suddenly coming up behind Marissa. "I told you to forget it." Samuel glares at me furiously.

"To forget what?" Marissa says in a stern voice. She turns and looks straight at Samuel. He doesn't look at her, just at me.

"Oh nothing. Cameron and I heard some squeaking last night. He thought it was you but probably was Lindsay, right Cameron?" Samuel says tightly.

Marissa turns her gaze on me now. Her stare is so hard and determined. She looks straight at me and I feel the sudden urge to tell her nothing but the truth.

"Uhh-" I mutter.

"Right?" Samuel says again through clenched teeth.

"Right." Marissa looks unsure but she nods slowly anyhow. I slow down my pace so I fall behind. Samuel steps in and starts up another conversation with Marissa. Probably trying to distract her. I'm sure she's the type of person who wont stop till she finds out the truth. Which seems weird. She's the one who was crying. Shouldn't she know exactly what was going on? Something weird is going on. Either that or Samuel is ridiculously protective.