Finnick had spent the rest of yesterday teaching me the ropes. I had never known that a person could have multiple orgasms in a row. My day with Finnick was...interesting...for lack of a better word. I had never felt so alive, so much like a woman. I could really get used to the feelings he awakened within my body. I couldn't for the life of me understand how anyone could get tired of such marvelous acts. We never did have sex that day. I wasn't in the least bit disappointed. As much as I had wanted to feel Finnick inside of me, I just didn't think I was mentally, as well as physically prepared for the repercussions just yet. I mean sure, I liked Finnick, but love, was certainly out of the question. We had bonded during the Quell. I had grown fond of him even. But love was too strong of an emotion. I'm sure I could learn to love him, but it was just to soon to tell.
By the time we were finished, I had decided it best to walk myself home. I didn't want to draw any suspicions from the town dwellers, though I'm positive people were linking his appearance to me. After all, we were both Victor's and Finnick's appearance was quite a rare treat for such a poor district as 12 is. The sad thing was, only few could afford him. That was another thing that struck me. Finnick would give his affections to anyone who could afford him. Though, he had told me money was no longer the matter. It was secrets. Which we had shared plenty of secrets yesterday. I was slightly intimidated by his experience, but I wasn't necessarily uncomfortable with it. I just didn't want to disappoint. And I didn't want to get hurt.
Today, I had woken a little later than usual. I suppose him ravishing me had worn me out. I smiled to myself within my covers, snuggling close as I thought of him. He was a rather perfect specimen. Anyone could see that. He was tall, broad, muscled, bronzed, and had a boyish charm about him that I had never quite seen before. What really surprised me was that, under all that cocky, devilish exterior, he was really very sweet. He hadn't pressured me into what I didn't want. He was patient. He wanted to wait on bmeb. I felt dizzy at this thought. After sitting up in my bed and rubbing my eyes, the beams of the morning sun had reminded me that it was my birthday. My nineteenth birthday. I actually made it another year. Another year into adulthood. Another year without a premature death. I did have the right amount of scars to prove my chronological age, that was for sure. Most of my scars were acquired from the Games.
I rose and stretched my muscles. I heard a knock on my door and turned my head. Yawning I uttered, "Come in."
Standing in my doorway with a solid, cold expression was Gale Hawthrone, my best friend, my confidant, my "cousin".
"Gale!" I said with enthusiasm, leaping from my bed and throwing myself toward him. It was so nice to see him. I hadn't gotten the privilege ever since he set to work in the mines. Our meetings were a rare treat. Forbidden. As my arms wrapped around him, I felt him shrug slightly, never returning the embrace. I pulled back looking into his matching Seam grey eye's puzzled.
"Gale?" I questioned him. He didn't say anything. He remained immobile, his eyes staring fiercely into mine.
"Finnick?" He questioned, his voice like the bare cold of winter. I felt like a tree caught in the mist, all my leaves stripped from me. Leaving me naked. Cold inside and out.
"What?" I questioned him.
"Finnick? You're with Finnick?" He spat at me, shoving me away, letting an air of distance fill the space where we were once joined. I stumbled back, my legs being supported by the edge of my bed.
"What are you talking about? I'm not with anyone. What made you come to that conclusion?" I guarded, becoming immediately defensive of myself.
"You do know yesterday was Sunday, right?' He looked at me, his arms now folded across his chest.
"Yeah, so?" I replied. Not quite knowing what he was getting at.
"Weren't you the least bit curious as to where I was? Sunday was our day." He relayed to me. A sudden realization hit my like a freight train. I suddenly felt all the air leave me, deflating me like forgotten birthday balloons. My throat had in immovable lump and my palms were clammy.
"What are you saying?" I asked, already knowing the answer in my heart.
"I showed up. Late, albeit it. I was helping my Mom around the house. I saw you with him, Katniss. I saw what he was doing to you, what you were doing to him. The sounds you coaxed out of each other." He spoke, his voice cracking at the very end.
"Gale..." I began, but he wasn't in the mood to hear anything coming from my traitorous lips.
"I didn't realize you were like that, Katniss. I mean, I had stolen kisses, pecks, here and there but..." He trailed off, his eye's becoming acquainted with my bedroom floor. I began to feel a heat rising in me. Anger. Why was this his business?
"So, what, Gale? What is it to you?" I question, tapping my foot. He began to laugh, hysterically. I looked at him quizzically.
"Are you being serious right know, Katniss? You mean to tell me, after all these years..." He began, but I wasn't in the mood to hear anything coming from his accusing lips.
"After all of what Gale?" I was livid now, my body shaking. He looked me over, his eyes full of fury.
"I fucking love you Katniss! Okay? I love you. I'm in love with you. I have always loved you. Since the moment I've laid eyes on you. Why do you think I've never taken up any of the many offers posed to me all this time? Huh? It certainly isn't because I don't have urges. Believe me, I do. But it's because all of those urges have always been directed toward you. You're the only girl I've ever seen with a sexual lens. I've dreamed of being with you, every night for years. To feel your soft skin, to taste every inch of you. It's been pure hell keeping that from you! I've tried to stop loving you. I wish I could. But, it's impossible. I wanted a future with you Katniss." He finally finished, never looking me in the eye's. I was stunned. I was in complete and utter shock. Gale Hawthorne, the talk of the Seam girls, my rock, was in love with me? Short, tiny, make-up bare Katniss? My head was spinning in spirals, not quite letting me catch up to speed. Gale finally broke the silence.
"Here," He said as he pulled a tiny metallic circle from his pants pocket.
"Happy fucking Birthday, Katniss." He spat, throwing the circle at me. I flinched as he turned, darting out of my house. My legs trembled as I bent down, picking up the object. It was a silver ring with a ruby encased with a smaller golden circle. A ring. Gale had gotten me a ring. I sat back onto my bed, exhaling heavily. Slowly, tears began to seep from my eyes. Faster and faster they fell, creating tiny streams down my cheeks, staining my skin, warming my face. My body was racked with sobs. I curled into a ball, holding the ring steady between my thumb and pointer finger, rubbing it. I had really, really screwed things up here. I brought the ring over to my nightstand. I then plopped back down onto my bed, resuming my previous position.
I heard another tiny knock on my cracked door. I sniffled, wiping my messy streaked face with my sleeve. I sat up, clearing my head.
"Come in." I croaked, my voice betraying me. I saw a tiny braided pigtail peek through, followed by curious eyes. Prim.
"Katniss? Are you okay?" She asked me, never quite allowing her full frame to come within my view.
"Come here, little duck." I called to her, opening my arms. Prim made her way slowly to me, holding a tiny white cake, coated in fluffy choclate frosting, small blue flowers decorating its surface. A little fork accompained it. She came and sat by me, the bed dipping barely with her tiny weight.
"Happy Birthday." She said, extending her hands to me, offering up the tiny sweet. I smiled at her, leaning forward to kiss her forehead. I grabbed the plate, picking up the fork. I dug into the cake, severing a small piece.
"Here, you have the first bite." I said to her, moving the fork toward her lips. She eyed the bite a moment, before cleaning the fork. She gave me a small thumbs up and I giggled.
"Peeta made it for you last night." She relayed to me, feeding me the next bite. I nodded as I chewed, relishing the rick, creamy taste.
"I suppose I'll have to thank the guy." I said, wrapping an arm around my little sister. She wasn't so little now, though. Fifteen years old. She was wise beyond her years. Strong. A healer, much like my mother. That gene had hastily skipped me. Peeta had always told me I had a way about me, though. A healer's touch.
"He worked really hard. Said he'd made two cake's before it. He wanted it to be just perfect for you." She said to me. Prim and I finished the cake, little sighs and 'mmm's' escaping us. Peeta had really out done himself. Once done, I told Prim I needed to shower. She nodded and exited the room, taking the tiny fork and plate with her. I made my way to the bathroom. I had still not gotten used to having running water. Having the choice between hot and cold water, nonetheless. It was a luxury I was extra grateful for. I looked at myself in the mirror, sighing. My face was streaked with drying, cooling tears. Prim was sweet for not mentioning how haggard my appearance was shaping up to be. I undid my messy, fraid braid, smoothing out the tangles before turning on the water, immersing myself within the spray.
Once cleaned and tidied, I made my way back into my room. I padded my way across the soft, beige carpeting of my floor, getting to the big, dark oak armoire in my room. I opened it and pulled out a pair of dark brown drawstring pants and a white short sleeved tunic. I found some simple undergarments and began dressing. When I was all adjusted, I sat down to my vanity. This piece was insisted on by Prim, who had a matching one in her room. We had surely been upgraded here in the Victor's Village. I picked up my brush and combed out my tangles, my hair cooperating and laying flat. I then braided my long hair down my back. I stood, grabbing the ring from my nightstand and dropping it in my pocket. I found my favorite worn boots next to my door. I slipped my feet inside, tucking my pants within them. I made my way out of the house, right across the lawn to Peeta's home.
When I made it, I knocked, waiting patiently. Peeta made it to the door a few moments after, his cheeks smeared in flour. He smiled at me and wiped a bead of sweat from his forehead.
"Happy Birthday!" He bellowed, pulling me into a warm embrace. I returned it and pulled back, smiling to him.
"Thank you. Oh, and double thank you for the cake. It was delicious." I told him, patting his back.
"My pleasure, birthday girl," He assured me. "Come on in. I've got something for you." He said, opening his front door to allow me full access. More surprises? I wasn't quite sure I was worthy. Sure, my birthday was always celebrated. But, I'd never had anything like this. No real appraisal. No real gifts. This was very different and I didn't know how to act.
I walked inside, the aroma of fresh bread filling my nostrils. My mouth was watering as he sat me down on his couch.
"Close your eyes." He ordered me. I obeyed him and closed my eyes, covering them as well as an extra precaution, showing him I meant business. I heard muffled footsteps as he left. When he returned I felt his presence.
"Open!" He exclaimed. When my eyes fluttered open and adjusted, before me I saw a small canvas adorned with a painting of me. In the woods. I was standing by a tree, a bow in hand, my arrow steaded on the string. My braid was across my shoulder and my cheeks were rosy, eyes narrowed. I smiled and tears began to well up in my eyes. Suck it up, I told myself.
"Oh, Peeta. It's wonderful." I told him, standing from the couch and hugging him.
"I was hoping you'd like it." He whispered against my hair, sending small chills down my neck. When I pulled away, he was looking at me, his eyes ful of intent. He inched his lips toward mine and I turned my head slightly to the side, his kiss landing on my cheek. He looked at me, puzzled.
"I-I'm sorry. I've just had a rough morning. Gale was..." I started, but waved my hand in dismissal.
"Come on, you can tell me." He told me, squeezing my hand. I looked at him, sighing before deciding on telling him a rather altered version.
"Gale just saw me out and about with Finnick, and he was jealous. He even admitted that he was in love me." I spoke, my voice squeaking. Peeta looked at me, his lips pulling into an odd expression. A mixture of surprise and sympathy.
"And how do you feel about him?" Peeta asked me calmly, sitting down. He patted to the cushion beside him and I followed suit, plopping down in an exaggerated fashion.
"I-I don't know, to be honest. He's Gale. My Gale. I've never really thought of him in that way. I never thought I could think of him in that way. It didn't feel allowed. I mean, we were both always so preoccupied with keeping our families alive, their bellies full. It would have distracted us probably, it would've interfered. I guess I just pushed the thought down immediately, not giving myself time to even think about it. To sum it up, instead of droning on, I just didn't have the time." I said, feeling relieved to have someone else to talk about it with. Peeta had an unexpected look on his face. One of disappointment.
"Oh, and he gave me this." I pulled the ring from my pocket, the ring shining in the dim light. Peeta looked at the object curiously.
"Wow, it's really nice," He stated, staring into the ruby. "What do you think it means?" He asked.
"I don't know, " I admitted. "Maybe he wanted to propel us forward finally?" I said, still in a bit of a shock.
"Do you want to propel forward?" He asked me. I sat and thought for a moment, never having asked myself that question.
"How can I know?"