A/N: Finally, I am back! I'm so sorry I made you wait so long for an update, but I got sidetracked by two separate brainwaves for two more different fanfics (one of which I've started writing and will be posted soon). But now I am back and fully committed to seeing this one to the end :)

Thank you to all my wonderful reviews, I'm glad you're enjoying it so far - and also thank you to those of you who are pointing out my mistakes, I really appreciate it, you are helping me become a better writer, so keep it up :)

Hope you like the update,

xBx

DISCLAIMER: I don't own jack...or harry for that matter. All belongs to JKR :)

~ Chapter 10: Beyond the Wall ~

Finally, after what seemed like an eternity, Hermione stepped over the threshold and back into her past; and thanks to the preservation charm Hermione had cast, everything was untouched and unchanged after ten years. To her left, a rail ran from one end of the small room to the other, on which hung her school robes and dress robes, on the wall opposite rested her school trunk, on top of which laid the small blue sequin bag Hermione had carried around the country in the hunt for Horcruxes. She was thankfully distracted from the sight by Crookshanks, who at that moment brushed past Hermione and launched himself into the luxurious, Gryffindor inspired, cat bed that sat next to the trunk. As the cat curled up and purred in contentment, Hermione couldn't help but smile, and felt a slight twinge of guilt at taking away his favourite bedding – though in her defence, she did buy him an equally luxuriant, and slightly bigger bed to make up for it, but the damned cat just did not like change. To Hermione's right was a large sized bookcase on which were all the books she had accumulated over her years at Hogwarts – from schoolbooks to giant tombs she had purchased whenever a particular topic had taken her fancy, and she had craved more information. At the end of this bookcase was a table, under which sat her cauldron (still full of a selection of potion ingredients). On top of the table sat her scales and other instruments she had used in her education, and there at the front sat her wand, wrapped carefully in the box in which she had bought it. She didn't feel quite ready to pull out her wand just yet, so she turned to examine the books on her right. Immediately the first book she had read after her first trip to Diagon Alley caught her eye, smiling to herself and thinking she may as well start from the beginning, she took down 'Hogwarts: A History' and turned. Leaving the door open, she went back to her bed, and began to read, only stopping when her eyes closed as sleep finally overtook.

####

The next day Hermione awoke early, having had the best night's sleep she'd had for a long time; making the most of her extra hour, she went for a run along the beach front – something she hadn't had the energy to do for nearly five years. She was therefore absent, when Harry dropped in, hoping to catch her before opening up. He apparated into the kitchen, as was his custom, expecting to see her sat at the small dining table, with her morning cup of tea and a slice of toast – the girl still hadn't changed her morning routine since she was at Hogwarts. When he found the downstairs deserted he braved investigating her room, reaching the top of the stairs, he saw her room door was open and didn't hesitate to continue in. He smiled, and a look of triumph clouded his eyes for a second, when he notice the door he'd revealed last night standing fully open,

"Hermione?" He called, though he'd been calling her for five minutes already, so he hardly expected a response. He looked around him, upon seeing the book on her nightstand, he laughed and picked it up, " 'Hogwarts: A History' " he chuckled, "she never changes." He replaced the book and walked through to the hidden room; looking around himself, he couldn't help but be amazed at how clean the room was – considering the place had been locked and left alone for ten years, he had expected some sign of neglect, lots of dust, perhaps a few cobwebs. He advanced to the rear of the room, and pulled out the cauldron from under the table, inspecting the ingredients within,

"How are they still fresh?" Harry asked aloud, taking out a bag and opening it to look at the contents,

"Preservation Charm" Hermione said from the doorway, causing Harry to jump a mile, dropping the bag in his hand, the contents of which spilt everywhere,

"Seriously?" said Hermione, folding her arms across her chest as she leaned into the doorframe, "First you're snooping in my bedroom, then you make a mess doing it?"

"Erm, I can explain…" Harry stuttered, finally looking up to meet Hermione's eyes, he was surprised to see her smiling,

"It's fine Harry, just make sure you clean it up before I get back from the shower"

"You're not mad?" He asked, wary of the temper he'd experienced in the past few months, Hermione sighed,

"No, and I owe you an apology. You were right,"

"I was? About what?"

"About me hiding from my past. I never really dealt with it. You were right." Harry remained silent, not really knowing what to say, Hermione rolled her eyes, "Go ahead, you can gloat. You were right, I was wrong. You are entitled to say 'I told you so'."

Harry grinned, but refrained, and instead asked, "How come you're up so early, where did you go?"

"I just had the best nights sleep I've had in a long time – I'm guessing facing my past lifted a lot of my subconscious worries – or some psycho-babble like that. Either way, I woke this morning unbelievably refreshed, and took advantage of the clear weather, and went for a run along the beach. And now I'm going to go shower before opening up, I'm running a little late," she added, checking her clock,

"I can make a start downstairs if you'd like," Harry offered,

"With a face like that? I don't think so. I don't want the few customers I have being scared away." She turned to leave, "Don't forget to clean up my ingredients," she reminded him.

Thirty minutes later, Harry had cleaned up his mess (with magic – he figured Hermione wouldn't mind.) and Hermione was downstairs, about to open up, and let in the first customer of the day. Harry had left fifteen minutes before, calling up to Hermione (who was still getting dressed), telling her he would call in later.

When Betsy entered, she immediately took in Hermione's lifted spirits,

"Ahhh, so the wanderer has returned then?" Betsy asked, sitting at her usual table,

"What do you mean?" Hermione questioned, then asked, "You're usual?"

"Yes please, dear. I was trying to say, judging by the definite upturn in your spirits, Harry returned safe and sound, I'm guessing?"

"Am I really that transparent?" Hermione laughed, as she made up a pot of tea, "But, yes, Harry returned last night" she confirmed, tray-ing up Betsey's tea things and taking it over to the table, "But I think the upturn in my spirits is more to do with the night's sleep I had last night"

"Oh really?" Questioned Betsy, with a sly smile, "I can imagine what might result in a good nights sleep" she said with a wink, causing Hermione to blush,

"Honestly, Betsey, it was nothing like that. We talked, and that's it."

"Mmhmm." Said Betsey,

"No gossiping, if you please," Said Hermione, "Me and Harry are friends, we talked. We had dinner, and he told about his work, and what he'd been doing the past month. And we'll leave it at that."

"Fine dear," Betsey accepted, "Just don't wait too long to make a move, the man won't wait forever."

For the rest of the day, whenever there was a lull in custom (which happened to be fairly often with it being mid-November), Hermione couldn't but ponder Betsey's words, and began to try and figure out just how true Betsey's suspicions were. She couldn't deny that having Harry back in her life had made her happier than she had been in years. And she also couldn't deny there was a definite physical attraction. But pinning down the extent of her actual emotional attachment was proving slightly more difficult: she missed him when he went away for longer than a day; she would get a fluttering in her stomach if he accidentally brushed passed her; if he ever touched her, held her hand, or gave her a hug, his tough would send tingles up her spine. But that didn't necessarily mean that she was in love with him…. did it?

Hermione still hadn't to fully answer these questions before her day was over, Harry turned up at 6:30pm, punctual as usual, though he was laden down with paperwork – Hermione came upstairs at 6:45pm to find he had overtaken her small kitchen table, papers covering every inch of it, as well as being piled on every chair.

"I take it I'm eating on the sofa tonight then?" Hermione said as she walked toward the kitchen. Harry looked up, looking slightly guilty, "I'm sorry, I got handed these when I was about to leave the office – this is the downside of heading the Auror division, lots of reports to read, then summarise into a Monthly report to the head of Magical Law Enforcement. I can move it all if you want?"

"Don't worry about it, I'll be fine for one night" she said while pouring herself a glass of wine, "You want to stay for dinner?" she asked, "Wine?" She added turning to look at him and then noticing the full wine glass in his hand, and the sheepish expression on his face, "I see you already helped yourself."

"Yeah, and dinner is in the oven, by the way. Lasagne" he added when Hermione turned and looked into her stove,

"Did you move in?" Hermione laughed, "But thank you. Looks good,"

"I can't take credit, Molly made me it." He admitted "She dropped it round while I was out this afternoon: apparently I looked peaky the other night. Another ten minutes it should be fully heated through."

Hermione nodded, not really sure what to say in response to the mention of Molly's name. "erm, How….how is Molly? And the others?" she asked quietly, not meeting Harry's eyes, the guilt starting to make it's way into her stomach,

"She's good. They're all good." He said simply, "The know that I've found you." He stated, Hermione's eyes snapped up to look at Harry, who could see the guilt and panic swirling in their depths, "I didn't tell them where you were. But they want to see you" he told her, not daring to show any emotion,

"I wouldn't know what to say" Hermione panicked, "I know they'll have been worried about me-"

"Do you?" Harry countered, "Do you really know that? Do you know what happened after you left? Do you really know how widely your disappearance was reported?" Harry asked, scepticism colouring his tone,

"Yes, I know I was reported missing - " Hermione started,

"And you still stayed away?" Harry almost yelled, "are you seriously that selfish?"

"I know because Betsy told me. Yesterday." Hermione countered, once again not looking at Harry, so he wouldn't see the tears starting to form, or the hurt and anger creeping into her eyes, "I didn't know at the time, I wasn't thinking at the time – and I know that is no excuse" she raised her voice, stopping Harry from interrupting "I'm not saying what I did was right, but at the time, I didn't know what else to do. And by the time I had managed to get my thoughts back on track, by the time I managed to think clearly about my actions, I was settled here, and I'd been away for so long that I was scared about coming back. I knew you would all be angry with me, because you had every right to be. And I was scared to face that anger. And the longer I left it the harder it got. So I took the cowardly way out, I am aware of that, and yes, that may be selfish of me. But if you want to talk about selfish, maybe we should also talk about you-"

"Excuse me?" Harry said, standing up and walking round to face Hermione, "I'm selfish? What the hell have I done?"

"Yes, you have been a little bit selfish. Ever since you got here you have been wanting to get me to come back with you. To leave this place behind, and return to London, to go back to the magical world,"

"Because it's where you belong!"

"ten years ago yes! But not now, not completely, this is my life now. And you asking me to give it all up is selfish!"

"This was a distraction!"

"To start with yes! But not now, I am happy, and I cannot give it up, not now. I am accepting the past, like you asked me too. I am letting magic back into my life, like you asked me to! I am thinking about coming back to London, about contacting the Weasleys, and our friends, like you asked me to! But I am not giving up my life here. That is too much. And it is selfish for you to keep asking it of me!"

Harry and Hermione stared at each other for what felt like an eternity, before Hermione turned, "If we don't serve this lasagne now it's going to burn."

A/N: Okay, so I know that their relationship isn't moving very fast, I'm not meaning to draw it out, I just feel that Hermione has a lot if issues she needs and admitting her feelings is very hard. But it's moving, and next chapter will be a definite move along, and this time I promise the next update will be along soon. promise.

so R&R please :) let me know what you think :)

xBx