As soon as the last words from the spell came out of her mouth, she knew something didn't feel right. There was a lot of light for a man of his height and build for a spell like that. Too much light. The pieces started to click in her mind as she watched the blur of pages flip and turn until they stopped, showing the man she thought was the great wizard turned into the dread dragon. She tried to react, tried to fight the spell, but it was too strong and there was no stopping it. It was going to happen. All she could do was throw a shield around herself and just let it happen.
It was over in a matter of seconds. It was quick and destructive. As the man she so blindly trusted grew and grew with his newfound power. Raven shrunk closer to the floor of her room, her safe haven, that was now crumbling. Was this what it felt like to have your life flash before your eyes?
When the transformation was complete and the dragon crawled through the tower, she lowered her shield to a second bang, this time it was Robin and the others breaking her door in to see what was going on. Seeing the dragon climb through her ceiling, they followed it at Robin's instruction, except for Beast Boy who wanted to check on his friend. He knew how happy she was with the paper man, saw it even when he was spying on her. And now here she was. Defeated on the floor. She gave him a quiet plea to get out of her room, and even though he wanted to stay and comfort her, he knew she wanted to be alone and his help was needed on the roof.
After the battle was over, Raven had accepted Cyborg's attempt at playing stankball. She didn't necessarily want to play, but she needed a distraction, even if it was playing that smelly game. She was thankful for his attempts at making her try to smile, even though they didn't work. But for just a moment, she was allowed to forget what had happened and watched the two boys bicker and play.
Walking her to the main room for dinner after their game, it didn't escape her notice that they walked her around her room, taking longer to get to the main room than normal. She didn't know whether to be thankful or annoyed, but she was hungry. So she followed the boys without any fuss.
It was a quiet dinner, the kind they had when something bad or surprising had happened. When no one knew how to react or what to say. And this time, she was the reason for that.
It was always an awkward feeling, eating while the others were silent, and it was even more uncomfortable knowing they were quiet because of her. Again, she didn't know whether to be thankful that they didn't bring up what happened, or to be annoyed that they were being so cautious around her. She had made a mistake, yes. But it didn't mean that she was proud of it either. She felt horrible. And she could feel their disappointment through the loud silence.
She stuck around half way through before she quietly excused herself. She made her way to the counter to wrap her plate for later before hearing Robin's voice in her head.
"I got it. You just go."
Raven turned around in surprise to face him before she remembered. 'Oh, yeah. The bond.'
It had been a few weeks since she had entered Robin's mind to save him from Slade's hallucinogenic influences which ultimately ended up forming a mental bond between the two. It took them a few days to realize what had happened and admittedly they were still trying to get used to it. But she still wasn't used to it and hearing his voice in her head and she didn't know if she ever would.
Giving him a small nod, she departed to her room with a feeling of dread. It was a complete wreck the last time she was there and she was hoping it was all somehow just something she made up. That her room was in the condition she left it in and that there is no magical wizard, well, dragon, there to manipulate her again.
Rounding the corner to her room she gave a defeated sigh. She didn't even go in yet but seeing her door crumpled on the floor and the damage to the bit of hallway surrounding her room, she knew it wasn't going to just magically be the same.
She stood there for a moment, trying to calm herself before she faced the consequences of her actions. She didn't want to see how bad it was, but it was better to just get it over with.
Taking a deep breath, she forced herself to her door and almost dropped to her knees upon seeing the damage. She gripped the door frame, well, what was left of it, to try to ground herself as she took it all in. If anything it looked worse than just a few hours ago. The fight on the roof must have added to the damage. Her door was lying crippled to the side, her bookshelf and dresser were completely demolished. The floor, walls, and ceiling were spotted with many holes ranging from big to small, some big enough for Cyborg to fall through. Her windows were blown out, the early autumn breeze coming through. Glass and rubble were skewn atop her bed, ripping the sheets and digging into the mattress. The bathroom, door blown in with mirror shards scattering along the floor glistening from the light that filtered in through the hall. Bottles were destroyed, towels were ripped, and she didn't even want to turn on the water to see what was going to happen.
As she slowly walked further in, minding the holes in the floor, she took it all in with a somber silence. Looking around at her books, furniture, plants, crystals, spell ingredients, blankets, clothes, all of it, either destroyed or broken.
Walking around, she made her way to her bed, trying to observe the frame. It looked fine from what she could tell, but she knew she should ask Cyborg just to be sure. She ran her hands gently along the torn comforter, glad she decided to wash her main blankets and sheets that day and thankful that they were currently safe in the dryer. She could buy another comforter, but she couldn't buy the quilt her mother made her.
Looking up at the giant hole in the ceiling, she slowly levitated up to it. She could see all the way outside, the night sky and stars greeting her with a calmness she couldn't match.
Gently, fingertips touched the rugged ceiling, as if it would weave together at her touch. She could block it with one of her barriers, but she knew it wasn't the smartest decision in the long haul. Smaller pieces fell off as she ran her hand along it, joining the other pieces of rubble along the floor and bed.
She gave one last look up at the stars twinkling above and lowered back down to the floor, ceiling and glass crunching below her boots.
She turned hearing a soft knock on her door, well, her door frame.
Robin stood in her doorway, looking around in silence but trying to make it not so obvious. "Are you ok?"
Raven was silent for a few seconds before she sighed. "I don't know."
"Are you hurt?"
'Emotionally, yes.' She thought. "No, not really."
"What does "not really" entail?" Robin asked, walking in more at the concern that she got hurt by that dragon, giving her a once over as he looked for any sign of injury.
"Just some bruises. Nothing worth worrying about." She assured. It was, after all, not completely a lie. She did have bruises, lots of them at that, but he wouldn't find them. She wouldn't show him. They were all over her torso and back from when she got grabbed in mid air. She hurt, really bad, but she had enough problems to worry about rather than some bruises. Afterall, they'd go away with time.
"Are you sure?" Robin asked, not completely believing her but not wanting to press it too much either. She had gone through a great ordeal that afternoon and he didn't want to add his stress and worry to her plate. But he was still worried and concerned. He couldn't help that.
She nodded slowly twice, eyes not meeting his as she continued to look around.
"I don't want to beat around the bush with this since it's already kinda late," Robin started, a bit nervous, "but what are you going to do tonight? You can't stay here, I want to make that very clear."
Raven closed her eyes and took a few breaths. 'In two, three, four, hold two, three, four, out two, three, four, five, six, seven, eight.'
She knew she couldn't stay in here for the night. She knew it was a safety concern and for practical reasons, but she didn't want to believe it. "I don't know."
It was quiet for a moment while Raven thought and Robin continued to look around.
"How about we set you up in Terra's room?" Robin suggested. He wouldn't tell her what to do but he could offer suggestions. "We could help you move some stuff- or you could do it," Robin retracked at her look at the mention of them helping her move her stuff, "and have you all set up there."
It was quiet again as Raven thought. That was the most logical choice, Terra's room. But it was Terra's room. She still has some angst and ill feelings towards her and she didn't know how she felt about staying in what was once her room. Plus she had to move most of her stuff in there. There was no way that she was just going to stay there for that night. She knew that. Which meant that she had to bring nearly all of her stuff in there and then have to move it back when repairs were over.
"You could also go out to the couch tonight and not worry about this until tomorrow, or you could have my room." Robin threw out.
"Your room?" Raven asked, confused.
Robin shrugged. "If you would feel more comfortable in there than Terra's room, then that's fine with me."
Raven nodded slowly, thinking her options over. She could either choose to stay in Terra's old room for however long it would take to get repairs done, take the couch for the night and make a decision tomorrow, or stay in Robin's room. But would he be there with her?
"Is that a yes to my room?" Robin asked, seeing her nod.
"Where will you go?"
"The couch most likely." He shrugged. Heck, he'd set up camp in the training room if he had to.
"But, you need your room."
"So do you."
Raven gestured to her shambled sad excuse of a room. "As you can see, I currently don't have one at the moment."
"Which is why I'm offering you mine as an option. You've spent enough time in there that I hope you would feel comfortable enough with it. If not then it's totally fine. You won't hurt my feelings." Robin gave a small smile trying to reassure her that he didn't mind.
Raven gave a small exhale in amusement and sighed. "I don't know what I'm going to do, but I do know that I need to shower."
"Well, then go shower." Robin said. "That way you can have some more time to think things over."
Raven nodded in agreement, looking around as she tried to locate some clothes she could change into after that weren't completely unwearable.
"You can use one of my extra pairs of pajamas if you want." Robin offered, seeing her search for anything salvageable and feeling her anxiety grow through their bond.
Raven opened her mouth to answer but was interrupted by a certain green teen who ran down the hall claiming to take the first shower of the night.
Robin gave a light smile at her scowl. "And you can use my shower as well. I have some stuff in there that you might like." He added seeing as Beast Boy wasn't going to give up his spot in the shower rotation or be out anytime soon.
"Don't you need to shower though?"
"Don't worry about me," Robin shrugged, "I'll figure it out. You're the first priority right now."
"But I'm already taking your room for the night, and your clothes-"
"You can have my room for a week if it would make you feel comfortable." Robin interrupted, not wanting to stress her out more than she already was. "I don't mind in the slightest as long as you're comfortable. You just tell me what you need and it'll happen."
Raven tried to argue back, that he shouldn't have to give up his room, his privacy, for her to be comfortable. That he could just leave her alone and she would figure it all out on her own. To stop worrying about her. But she knew it was futile. He would just counter her argument with logic and common sense and have the final say. So having no helpful words to speak, she just nodded again, this time making a point to not look at him, hoping he would get the hint and leave.
"I'll be in the common room if you need me." Robin told her, knowing that he had won the discussion and that she wanted him out. "Am I allowed to have Cyborg come and look in here at some point?"
Raven grabbed the side of her cloak to gently feel it, nodding as she turned away from him.
"Alright." Robin nodded, even though she couldn't see him. "I'll go and get some things from my room and leave the door unlocked ." He knew she was going to stay in her room for a bit longer, whether she tried to clean or pack some things up, so he made sure she knew he was giving her some time before she went to his room. Plus he had a feeling that she would feel more comfortable without him packing some of his things while she was in there.
He watched her for a moment more before he departed, leaving her alone to do what she needed to do.
Hearing and sensing him leave, Raven turned around to make sure he was gone before she felt her eyes water. 'No. No, no, no, you don't need to cry. There's no need to.' She thought to herself, taking a deep breath and gripped her cloak tighter, looking up at the ceiling, trying to not break down. She couldn't afford to have a good cry like the others could. It would only make things worse. She wanted to cry and let herself breakdown, but she didn't have that luxury. So instead she just stood there, taking deep slow breaths until she was ready to get some things together.
'In two, three, four, hold two, three, four, out two, three, four, five, six, seven, eight.'
Walking towards her closet, she hoped that what was inside was all intact to at least some degree. Her hand stayed on the handle for a second more before she slid it open. She sighed in relief upon seeing everything still intact, especially her uniforms. She could easily just buy her other clothes again, but the uniforms were a bit more difficult.
Pulling out a decent sized bag, she started grabbing things that she could use for the night and potentially the next day. She packed things like her brush, a book, her phone and communicator with their chargers, and some clothes from her dresser that were still in one piece. Thankfully that included a few pairs of underwear and socks. The rest she would have to reevaluate the next day.