Yay, finally, a new chapter. Sorry for the long delay. I was worried about this chapter because I'm terrible at making those, but I hope you would enjoy it.
Anyways, let's get into it.
Oh, almost forgot the line. I do not own Evangelion in any way, shape or form. I'm the Knight. I'm Vengeance. I'm...Amogus.
...Black. Darkness. Nothing.
...Pure nothing.
Where am I?
What is this place?
What is going on?
...What am I?
...
I can't remember a thing.
It's too dark, like when you're in a tropical forest with no torches or lights at night, except it's worse. I can't even feel anything. I can barely do anything at all, except thinking about myself.
How long have I been thinking?
...Ah great, forgot to count again.
Hmph. What is my purpose? Staring at nothing or what?
What was my name again... Argh, no clue. Nothing came in mind except thoughts after thoughts.
I tried to speak, but no words came out.
I tried to scream, but no sound came out either.
It's like I was not existing at all. I can't feel anything, I can't do anything, I can't even see anything except the ominous black space.
I hate its colour. It's disgustingly hideous. Nothing came out of it, and it scares me. And when I see it, I can feel something staring me back from the opposite side,
but it isn't true. It scares me by not doing anything at all.
Even though I couldn't feel my emotions, I can feel urges to puke at it. But none came out. Because I don't have any organs to do so, I think, or atleast I'm not
feeling having one at the moment.
I'm nothing but ... nothingness. No word was fit to describe me. I might not have a body at all. Man, I wished, it would be awesome to have some bodies. You can
see stuffs with eyes, touch stuffs with skins, or eat with your mouth. Yeah, something like that would be welcomed. Or even interacting with someone.
Right.
...But what's the point if you were alone?
Even if I have a body, there would be nothing to do with it. There's nothing around here, except the darkness. As far as I know, darkness is not a object. It's just a
word to describe how dark a place is, right?
And there's certainly no one around here.
...
Argh, it would be certainly better if I dissapeared eons ago. I wouldn't have to deal with some depressing thoughts like now.
I have been doing nothing but thinking about myself repeatedly for a really, really long time.
What was his name again... Oh right, Reaper!
Grim Reaper, or whatever you call yourself, please show up and uh, what was the word again, ah right, take my soul or whatever! I don't wish to be alive anymore! It's not like I'm suicidal or anything! It's boring here! Anyone? Anything, please show up and take me with you! Really! I can be your friend, pet, or even slave! Just get me the hell out of here!
Anyone? Hello? A little no one here is needing your accompany? Really, anyone can show up! Don't be shy, I wouldn't harm you at all. In fact, I'm none-existent, so don't be scared!
...
Oh. Right.
If I had a heart, it would sink into oblivion.
I feel the urges to cry, so hard that it would damage my none-existent eyes, but I can't.
I'm useless.
After all this time, the only thing that has changed was my way of thinking. It went up and down, most of the time it went down. A lot.
Please. Someone please end my existence.
It's painful.
It hurts.
It hurts.
IT HURTS.
Why does it hurt me so much, I wasn't able to feel things in the first place, not even emotions. So why...?
WHYWHYWHYWHYWHYWHYWHYWHYWHYWHYWHYWHYWHYWHYWHYWHYWHYWHYWHYWHYWHYWHYWHYWHYWHYWHYWHYWHYWHYWHYWHYWHYWHYWHYWHYWHYWHYWHYWHYWHYWHYWHYWHYWHYWHYWHYWHYWHYWHYWHYWHYWHYWHYWHYWHYWHYWHYWHYWHYWHYWHYWHYWHYWHYWHYWHYWHYWHYWHYWHYWHYWHYWHYWHYWHYWHYWHYWHYWHYWHYWHYWHYWHYWHYWHYWHYWHYWHYWHYWHYWHYWHYWHYWHYWHYWHYWHYWHYWHYWHYWHYWHY
...Huh?
What is that dim light? Is it coming towards me?
Something has changed. For the first time, I felt something aside from the pain of existence.
Oh, is it coming this way!?
"THAT DAMNED SISTER! CALLED ME IN, AND THEN KICKED ME OUT BECAUSE YOU HATE ME!? WHERE AM I EVEN GOING TO!? MOM, DAD, IF YOU'RE OUT THERE PLEASE INTERVENE OR SOMETHING! I HAVE BEEN FLYING FOR THIRTY YEARS!"
The loud noises were coming from a flying comet, which apperently didn't look like a comet at all. A blue shape of light, resembling a strangely blank robot with two gigantic pieces of cardboard on its shoulders, and a blue orb stuck on its chest.
"If only I knew she was this kind of sister, I wouldn't send my children to her! All of them was massacred, by her children, who she clearly used as a pawn to hurt my kids! They were obedient and cute, unlike yours, sister! I answered your call, got reduced to an stupid embryo, reunited with you, and this is what I got in return!?"
It was clearly angered. Or, in other word, "pissed off". Or "really pissed off". He looked like he would rip me in half to calm himself down.
Despite that, I could feel a grin forming on my face(if I have one in the first place).
Unconcerned by his words, I attempted to hug him. Or atleast I think that was what I was trying to. Spreading my hand(?), I tried my best to touch him. Or hug him. Anything to stop him from flying.
*thud* - I tried to mimic the noise when something hits me. That wasn't effective, considering the fact that noise couldn't be travelled in space, or I am just mute. If it was the former, then why would the comet makes noises in the first place?
Or were the noises transferred to my head(metaphorically, because I don't have one) directly? Most likely.
I tried to mimic the way the comet spoke. But before I was able to say anything, the comet released a surprised tone.
"Woah! Did someone just hug me? Huh? I can't see anyone at all. Somebody there? Anyone?"
He was surprised.
"Well, I'm here." I said, barely containing my excitement. Years, it has been years for me to finally talk to someone. Someone real.
"Huh!? Show yourself, or I will turn you into dead meat!"
Was that a threat? Oh no, I mustn't make the first impression awkward! I don't want to be alone again!
"I'm here! Hello, I'm here!" I spoke as loud as I could to his mind(probably). His blue, blank head spinning around, looking for the owner of the voice(me, of course). His eyes were set on me instantly.
"The only thing I can see is nothingness, a shadow of what you might used to be. Are you real?"
"Whaaaat, of course I am, duh!" I grinned. "How would I be able to hug you if I wasn't real, then?"
Please stop before I have another existential crisis, please.
"Oh, alright then. Who are you?"
"Who am I? Do you know who I am?" I asked back.
"No, who are you!? I don't know who you are, so I asked "Who are you?" for informations, not for you to repeat it back." The blue gigantic robot sighed.
"I don't know!" I beamed.
"What do you mean "I don't know"!? You don't even remember who you are!?" He grimaced, facepalming mentally.
"Yep! In fact, this is the first time I talked to someone! Man, I love talking with someone! It has been so lonely out here!"
A moment of awkward silence.
"...How long?" He asked with a concerned tone.
"Eons! I don't remember anymore, stopped counting after like, a thousand years? Well, that doesn't matter anymore! I'm not alone anymore! Yay!" I yelled inside his head.
"...Poor soul."
"Ehe, don't talk about it like that! Can we be friends now? Promised that you won't leave me! It is painful to live alone out here, you know? Nothing to do, with absolute nothing to talk to. Please, don't leave me."
"...Are you crying?"
"Am I? I dunno, don't have eyes, I think?"
A moment of silence. Then the robot laughed.
"Ha ha, very interesting. You are an interesting one, aren't you? Well, since I was blasted to here and currently not having any way to come back my place, I will be your friend." He chuckled.
"Yay! First friend! I'm so happy!" I beamed a smile in his head.
"Hey, knock that out. Friends don't scream at eachother like that. But hey, I'm your first friend, so I will allow that."
"Hug!"
"Heh heh, hug. Hey, you are kinda small, you know? Even in this weakened state of mine, you're barely bigger than my palm." He said, chuckling.
"I don't care! Hug me back!"
"A bit demanding, aren't you, little guy? Sure thing." Without saying any further, he shrunk to my size and bearhugged me.
...I'll admit that it was kinda painful. But hey, atleast I realized that I actually feel something!
His body wasn't warm as I expected though. Well, better than not feeling anything at all.
I slowly realized that my body was shining light at the moment.
"Woah, what is happening to my body? I feel funny!"
"You touched me, a being that was practically made of life itself. Your soul is reconstructing itself back to...something new, I think? I don't really know much about myself either." He shrugged. "I never touched everyone aside from my sister. Wait, that sounded wrong on so many levels. Anyways, you're also my first 'friend', too."
"Yay! We will be best friends forever! What should we do now, Mr. Blue?"
"...Call me Adam. That's my real name."
"Okay Adam. What shall we do now, best friend?"
Adam laughed.
"Let's begin with some games first, uh... What is your name again?"
"I don't know! Call me whatever you like! I believe in your naming senses!"
"Hehe, thanks. Well, how about..."
"Shinji."
"Shinji?" The name felt familar... Whatever.
"Sure thing! From this day onward, my name shall be Shinji!"
"...Nice to meet you, Shinji."
"Nice to meet you too, Adam. We will be besties!"
And that's how I managed to make my first friend ever: Adam.
We spent days, weeks, months, hell, years playing Adam's games. Most of them are fun, although I nearly always ended up as the loser, but hey, I don't care about losing much. It's fun, and that's enough for me.
I love spending times playing with Adam. His games make me feel joy, he is always there for me, preventing me from feeling alone and useless. Hell, we even talked about his world. About his sister, Lilith, and her children, the Lilins, often referring themself as 'humans'.
"They was a funny bunch. Too bad I couldn't play with them directly, because humans are scared about what they don't know." He said, pointing at himself. "Me. Well, our first encounter was...not too good. I ended up harvesting nearly a half of their souls, so that was a bad idea. They found the Spear, threw it at me, and bam, I became a fossil. Years later, some idiots decided it would be a great idea if they took parts of my fossil and studied it to become equals to us, the Angels."
"And what happened after that?"
"They all died, reunited with my sister Lilith. Funny. And one of them fused with Lilith's robotic clone, Unit 01 or something like that, saying that she would be the eternal testament of humanity or something. Oh, and she stole the damn Spear, too."
"Isn't that kinda pointless? Well, her race was murdered, and the only thing she did was grabbing a spear and launching her off the world, basically floating in the universe like an idiot!?"
"Woah woah, why are you so angry my guy?"
"Yes I am! I have been here for years, drowned in loneliness, and she just...I don't know, leave her world and...ARGH! SO ANGRY!"
"Chill, chill, Shinji. I know. It's against human nature to stay alone. It's weird indeed."
" I CAN'T! WHY SHE, A HUMAN, WHO CAN EASILY MAKE FRIENDS AND FAMILY, LEAVE ALL OF THEM BEHIND! UNGRATEFUL! SELFISH! STUPID! STUPID!STUPID!STUPID!STUPID!STUPID!"
I raged.
"You said she was a mother, right!? A mother is not supposed to leave her children, or family! They would be heart-broken to see that their family member left them for a fucking stupid mission! And the mission would be futile if humanity was wiped out, then what's the point of running away like a coward!?"
"Shinji."
"Sorry. I was overreacting."
"No,don't be sorry for that. I perfectly understood your anger, Shinji."
"You do?" I looked up to him.
"Well, let's just say fusing with my sister wasn't a waste of time after all. I saw all of it, Shinji, and I did think about it a lot."
"What's your point?"
"People don't like to get hurted, Shinji."
"What do you mean?"
"Hedgehog's dilemma, or something like that. It makes people scared to 'touch' eachother. They will always try to run away from the problem if they could do it in the first place. Yui Ikari was one of those people, I believe."
"She is? I don't really buy that."
"One day, Shinji, and you will understand. I couldn't expect you to understand human's minds and emotions in one week."
"I will wait until that day. For now, what should we do? Chess, perhaps?"
Suddenly, a circle of light began to show up from the distant space. Adam instantly stood up, staring at the circle with his concerned look.
"...It looked like we don't have much time left."
Adam spoke, and the chess board I just bought up dissappeared.
"Aw c'mon, it was my chess board! That took me a lot of time to make it!" I pouted.
"You just manifested it like it was nothing. Anyways, as I said, we don't have much time left." Adam said, hastily creating another light circle in his palm. Unlike that circle over there, this one has several blue light strips on it, as if it was made from Adam's light blue body.
"Absorb this." He then threw it at me after checking it several times. I nodded, and the blue light circle was dissappeared in my chest.
"What was that?"
"A save point. If I die now, you will act as an anchor to pull me back."
"What!?" Shocked, I asked him again."What do you mean you're going to die?!"
"The End Of Instrumentality is about to begin, resetting it all over again." Adam explained after adjusting his glasses a bit(which he didn't wear before, but he did it anyways to fit the mood)."When that light circle explode, stand behind me. After hearing a click, grab all of my fragments as soon as possible and close your eyes."
"The End Of Instrumentality? Okay, is this some kind of jokes? I'm sorry Adam, but this is not-"
"Listen, Shinji." Trying to be calm for the last time, he sighed. "Our time is up. It has been a great time hanging around with you."
Oh no.
"W-wait! Don't talk like you're going somewhere and never come back! Have I done something wrong? If I did, I'm really sorry! Don't leave me!"
"No, you didn't do anything wrong. We will meet again. It's just my silly little sister who couldn't handle her own thoughts so she will release a wave of energy that will cause time and space to shift into the past." Adam talked that last part really fast, his eyes were looking away.
"Oh, alright."
"Wait, what? You aren't a bit surprised at why my sister was literally going to self-destruct?"
"Adam, the last month you made me creating stuffs like light blades that I didn't even know with my bare hands. Last week, you created a whole tournament and turned yourself into 32 Adams who can make black holes and space-time rifts. If your sister Lilith becomes the Big Bang, I wouldn't even be surprised." I shrugged.
"Yeah, so this is just another Tuesday for you, isn't it?" Adam laughed.
Nodding my head, I let a grin made its way to my face.
"You cocky little bastard. I'll let this slide for now."
"Hehe, sure." I noticed the light circle was getting bigger and bigger, and the grin on my face dissappeared.
"Adam." I looked at him in the face.
"What is it?"
"Promise me that you would come back."
"Deal." The blue gigantic figure patted me on my head. "Close your eyes, bud."
Hugging Adam from the behind, I closed my eyes.
The wave of energy has come to our place.
"Have faith in me, Shinji."
Before I was completely knocked out, Adam shattered like a broken mirror. Holding what's left of him, I shed one last tear before getting vaporized by the wave.
Then the world was covered in darkness.
*clicks*
Opening my eyes again, I stared at the bag.
"Wait, where the hell am I!?"
Oh right, Tokyo-03. Another explosion started, and fighter jets were flying over my head, circling the gigantic invader who just made his debut in this city.
It was chaotic as hell. A sudden explosion snapped me from my trance, as I was looking at the photo of this... old woman wearing a yellow bikini, and a arrow pointing at her chest. A messed up message was written on the photo: "P/s: Feast your eyes on these, signed, Misato Katsuragi."
"Okay, this is really weird. Too weird." Throwing the photo away, he looked on the sky. "Hope that she won't make me give that back to her. I don't wanna touch it again." Sorry Ms. Misato, don't want to lose my innocence yet.
"What was I thinking about...Oh right, I was standing here to wait for miss Misato to pick me up. Didn't expect I needed to wait this long though." Sitting down at the bench, Shinji recalled his memories.
My name was Shinji.
Shinji Ikari.
Fourteen years old, currently just got summoned to my father's company, NERV or something. Something military, I guess? He didn't say much things about NERV. He just sent a letter, which was a absurdly short one at that. "Come." is the only word in the entire letter.
My father is really a douchebag, isn't he? He left me at my uncle's house for like, ten years? Well, it's acceptable, I think? My uncle tried to explain that my father was a workaholic, so I expected as much, but I didn't think that he was the type of person who writes a single word on a paper and call it a letter.
A sudden roar from the beast on the sky caused me to look at it. Its body is tall, thin, and humanoid. Its proportions didn't match those of a human; its arms are long enough to reach below its knees and its legs and feet are elongated and disproportionate... wait, no, I didn't want to describe it that much. And there was a gigantic red orb thingy in its chest.
Something is fishy about it. It reminded me about someone...familiar.
Looking around while tapping my feet impatiently, I finally realized that I was a dumbass to listen to that woman named Misato. There wasn't a single trace of humans here. They might have already been escorted to safe places, while I was sitting here watching the enormous monster wreaking havocs in the city. Just great.
...You know, it's eerily calm here. Kinda scary. Or spooky.
A faint smell grabbed my attention.
"Blood?" I turned around, and...
Holy hell.
A blue-haired beauty who was wearing bandages all over her face, revealing only one red eye. Her right arm was bandaged with a cast, and she was looking at the angel.
"Oi, you! Why are you bandaged?! Why are you here? I have to get you to somewhere safe!" I quickly stood up, rushed to her.
The girl looked at my face, tilting her head, her eye filled with curiosity.
"Oi! Atleast say something! Come here, let's- *achoo*!" I sneezed. Looking up again, I saw nothing. "Huh? Where did she go?"
It was so sudden, even I couldn't understand why she dissappeared without a trace.
I swore that she was standing right here...
The blue-haired gal just dissappeared in one second, leaving me in confusion.
"Surely that wasn't my imaginations going wild, right?" I thought silently, but I was interrupted by a car noise behind my back.
"Kept you waiting, huh?" A woman's voice was echoing in the air. I turned back and stared at the woman.
"You are Shinji Ikari, right? Hop on. We have to run for our life now. Let's go." Pulling her sun glasses out of her pocket, the lavender-haired woman named Misato put them up on her eyes.
"So cool..."
Needless to say, I jumped right in the car, and Misato Katsuragi drove the car as the missiles were exploding on the sky like fireworks.
"I have a feeling that this might go well." Shinji thought while sitting in her car, despite the relentless barrage of rockets and missiles were struggling to affect the abnormal humanoid beast.
"Oh well, I'm sure they can handle that. It's not like I will get in a gigantic robot and fight that comically large monster anyways."
Later did I know, I was stupid enough to believe in common senses at Tokyo-03 here.
Well, I made it guys. Thank you for reading.
Thanks for the review, it really made my day. You can also leave a review if you wanted to correct something.
Once again, thanks for reading. It might be confusing at first, or not, but I promise I would make it easier to understand some details in later chapter.
Justareader2127: Thank you for your review. I hoped this could satisfy you for now.
Have a nice day/night, people. Stay safe.
p/s: The pacing is awful, and I'm sorry for it. I will try to correct this error next time.