A/N: Happy Thanksgiving! :)
We here at loft and Spencer has decided to prepare her famous bowtie pasta for dinner, it's completely mouthwatering, it's her best dish. I pick up a spoon and dip it into the sauce, "oh wow…Spence…"
"Good?"
"Unbelievably" I smile as I throw the dirty spoon in the sink. I go to take a seat on the bar stool just to watch her cook. I'm finding it harder and harder to not be in her presence.
"So Ashley… Spencer says you're a song writer?" Oh yeah I forgot Heather is here too. She's sitting across from me the at the kitchen island.
"Yes, yes I am." I give her a coy smile.
"So have you written anything I would know?" Heather asks intrigued. I shrug my shoulders. The list is long and I'm sure she's heard at least one; most are played on the Top 40 stations.
"Don't be so modest Ashley." Spencer spins around from stirring the sauce. "Ashley writes amazing lyrics. But my favorite has to be the one she wrote for me." Spencer gushes and a blush covers my face.
"She wrote you a song?" Heather says confused.
"It was a birthday present. She begged me for it." I wave my hand dismissively.
"I so did not beg. You surprised me with it. Wait here…" Spencer walks into her bedroom and comes out with her Ipod in hand. Oh no! "I'll play it for you." Spencer docks her Ipod into the Bose sound system we have in the kitchen and the song starts to fill the silence in the loft.
Friday night beneath the stars
In a field behind your yard
You and I are painting pictures in the sky
And sometimes we don't say a thing
Just listen to the crickets sing
Everything I need is right here by my side
And I know everything about you
I don't wanna live without you
I watch Spencer as she sings softly to the song I wrote for her two years ago and a smile plays on my lips. I remember how excited she was when she first heard the song. I turn my head and see Heather staring at me intensely, but quickly throws me a smile and looks away.
I'm only up when you're not down
Don't wanna fly if you're still on the ground
It's like no matter what I do
Well, you drive me crazy half the time
The other half I'm only trying
To let you know that what I feel is true
And I'm only me when I'm with you
Just a small town girl and girl
Living in the crazy world
Trying to figure out what is and isn't true
And I don't try to hide my tears
The secrets, all my deepest fears
Through it all nobody gets me like you do
And you know everything about me
You say that you can't live without me
I'm only up when you're not down
Don't wanna fly if you're still on the ground
It's like no matter what I do
Well, you drive me crazy half the time
The other half I'm only trying
To let you know that what I feel is true
And I'm only me when I'm with you
When I'm with anybody else
It's so hard to be myself
And only you can tell
That I'm only up when you're not down
Don't wanna fly if you're still on the ground
It's like no matter what I do
Well, you drive me crazy half the time
The other half I'm only trying
To let you know that what I feel is true
And I'm only me
Who I wanna be
Well, I'm only me when I'm with you
With you, oh, yeah
"What artist was singing that? Heather asks once the song is over.
"That was Ashley." Spencer proudly states.
"Oh so you sing too?"
"No I don't really prefer to sing but it was a song just for Spencer. I couldn't have just anybody record it. So I recorded it myself." It's really nothing. The song was just too personal for it to be sung by anybody else or even recorded by anybody else. It's something that will always just be mine and Spencer's.
"She quiet talented." Spencer boasts and I'm finding it very hard not to blush at all her comments. "Wine?" Spencer pulls out three wine glasses and slowly starts to fill them with Chardonnay.
She sets the now full glass in front of me "Yes, I'd love some wine Spence." She giggles and sticks her tongue out at me. I can't help but laugh at her childish antics.
"How long have you guys been friends?" Heather asks before taking a sip of her wine.
"Ten years. But it seems lot longer than that, right Ash?'
"Yeah, I tried to ditch you years ago. You just continue you to follow me around like a lost puppy." That comment earned me a smack on my arm. I chuckle.
"Ass."
"I do have a great looking ass, thank you. Nobody can deny that." Spencer smirks before turning around and pulling plates out of the cabinet and I try not to glance at her ass when she reaches up for the plates.
"So you guys never dated?" I almost choke on the wine I'm drinking and I watch as Spencer almost drops a plate on the ground.
"No." Spencer answers honestly. I can't help but see the wheels in Heather's head spinning like she's trying to figure something out, but Heather nods her head and the subject is dropped. "So dinner is ready."
We've eaten dinner and now we are all at the table having another glass of wine just talking about past memories.
I'm laughing hysterically; I can barely catch my breath while I'm trying to tell the story.
"So, Spencer comes from behind a tree, pants around her ankles and screaming bloody murder."
"Ashley! Ashley!" I turn my head and see Spencer running towards the car with her jeans down around her ankles as she tries to pull them up.
"Jesus Spence, what the hell?" She jumps in the car in a state of panic.
"Skunk!" She shrieks and I rolled up the windows quickly and it's then I notice beside the tree she just came running from sits a small black cat with a white spot. I immediately bust out laughing. "What? Ashley!" Spencer asks with irritation in her voice.
"Is that the offending skunk right there?" I point towards the cat that is now trying to climb the tree; my stomach hurts so much from laughing so hard.
I'm still laughing that I barely hear her mumble a series of curse words and something about having cat stew for dinner.
"Oh come on Spence that was hilarious."
"Yeah real funny Ash, I still have to use the restroom." She states with a pout.
"Go. It won't be another hour until we hit the city lights of LA." We decided to take an impromptu road trip and now we are on our way back home.
"No way. I'm not going back out there. I'll just wait."
"You're going to wait an hour Spence?"
"Yup." She nods.
"I told you not to drink those last two margaritas." I sing song.
"Shut up and drive Ashley." She tries to say sternly but it just makes me laugh more.
"She squirmed the whole way home."
"Yeah and you choose that night to finally obey the traffic laws." We smile at each other both thinking about the memory.
"With your history, I'm sure you have plenty of great stories." Heather says breaking us from our goofy smiling faces.
"We do." We both say at the same time.
"Hey beautiful people," Kyla says as walks into the loft with a giddy Glen behind her.
"What are we doing?' She says grabbing a wine glass and pouring herself some wine before sitting down in Glen's lap who has pulled a seat out and joined us at the table.
"You know just telling stories and talking."
"Oh man did we miss the skunk one?' Glen asks happily.
"Just missed it." I laugh.
"That's my favorite. I think I almost wet myself when Ashley told me what had happened that night." Glen and Kyla both laugh at the memory of that night. They were waiting at the loft when we had returned that night and Spencer rushing into the bathroom with a series of cuss words about pissing in her pants soon and me laughing behind her.
"Well I'm glad I can humor you all." Spencer pouts and I watch as Heather grabs her hand from off the table and stroke it lovingly. I don't miss the smile that appears on Spencer's face, or the subtle glances they give each other. It's then that I start to feel the pangs in my heart. There's no way I can tell Spencer how I feel.
She doesn't need the complication in her life. She's happy and that's all I want for her, is for her to be happy.
"What was that?' I'm pulled out of my thoughts when I see the whole table looking at me.
"Where'd you go just now?" Kyla probes.
"Oh, nowhere." I look around and see everybody starting at me. This has been happening a lot lately. I missed something. "What?" I ask.
"I said we are thinking about going out for drinks, do you want to come?" Kyla slowly repeats her sentence making sure I was able to understand and comprehend this time.
"Why don't we all just stay here? We've got a fully stocked liquor cabinet and great music. We can dim the lights down low and just take it easy here?" I breathe out not really wanting to leave Spencer's company.
"Yeah that sounds like fun Ash. Is it okay if we hang out a little longer?" Spencer turns to Heather and gives her an adorable pout. My pout. Well it's not exactly my pout, but it's the pout she uses on me on all the time.
My body is overcome with pangs of jealously that flows through my veins.
"Of course cupcake," Heather says placing a chaste kiss on Spencer's pouty lips.
"I'm calling Maddie." I say getting up from the table making a beeline to my room to call Madison and let her know we're hanging out and to get her big ass over here.
When I make it back into the living room and hear music playing and Kyla as lit various candles, that are scattered all over the house. It's nice. Spencer and Kyla are laughing in the kitchen while surely making their signature party drink. I honestly don't know what's in it, it something they completely made up on their own, all I know it consist of cherry vodka as the main ingredient.
Once Madison arrives the party gets started and being the dancer of the group she gets everybody up and dancing in the middle of the living room. We haven't had a night all together in a long time. The music changes and all the respective couples start to dance slowly. "Come on bitch. Dance with me." Madison pulls me up and we start dancing together.
"I knew you had it bad but I didn't realize it was this bad." I look at Madison with confusion at her statement. "It's written all over your face how much you're in love with her, you haven't taken your eyes off her all night. And I don't think I'm the only one that's noticed." I watch Spencer and Heather from across the room; they're dancing slowly together and are laughing at something Heather just whispered in Spencer's ear.
Madison stealthily guides us closer to them. "May I have this dance?" Madison holds out her hand for Heather to take. Spencer laughs at the gesture.
"Of course," Heather offers out her hand for Madison to take and they begin to spin them around the room gracefully.
"Dance with me." Spencer states. I put my hands on her hips as she wraps her arms around my neck bringing our bodies achingly close together. I hear her sigh.
Christina Perri's Distance starts to flow throw the speakers and I realize how perfect this fits with my feelings right now.
"You look beautiful tonight Spence." I whisper out. The glow of the candles are lighting up her face rather nicely. "You always look beautiful, but the candles compliment you well."
"You're beautiful," She looks down and shakes her head. "I mean you look beautiful too." She says looking back up at me. We both smile at our honesty as we gently sway back and forth.
"Dinner was amazing, as always."
"I cooked your favorite."
"I know. Why?"
She looks at me confused but it's an honest question. "I just really wanted you and Heather to have a chance to get to know each other because I really want you to like her. So I figured if I enticed you with your favorite dinner, you'd agree happily. "
"I already told you I was going to have dinner with you guys." Spencer is about to reply when we are interrupted.
"Stop hogging Spencer, it's my turn. " Madison grabs Spencer out of my hands and starts to dance her around the room, vaguely hearing Madison ask Spencer if she knows the Tango. I shake my head at my crazy friend.
"You're in love with her." It wasn't a question. It was a statement that held so much truth to it. But when the words leave her mouth I freeze up and I'm pretty sure I'm pale in the face. Way to be subtle Ashley.
"I…I..no." Gulp.
Heather laughs, "you can't even lie properly. It's okay, I don't blame you. Look at her she's gorgeous, kind, and considerate. I'm pretty sure there is a piece of her that is in love with you too."
Why is she telling me all of this?
"Why do you think she's in love with me too?"
"I'm not blind Ashley. I see the way she looks at you. It's the same way you look at her. I see the way her face lights up when she talks about you. But she's with me and I promise to make her very happy."
I nod my head, not really needing to say anything else. I don't know how to process everything she just said to me. I don't think I even want to process it. My head is spinning and the room starts to spin but it's probably more so from the alcohol.
I sneak off to my bedroom hoping nobody notices so I can just pass out, I lay down on top of my bed not worrying about anything else.
"Hey drunko." She whispers out.
"ughhi" She laughs softly. She begins to untie my shoe laces and takes my shoes off my feet. I'm half-awake as she moves around my room. I feel a blanket being draped over me tucking me in. I half open my eyes, as I search for her silhouette in the dark room. "You're too good to me Spence."
She sits down on the bed next to me. I look up at her and she runs her fingers through my hair pausing to massage my scalp for a brief moment. I love when she does it. It always puts me to sleep.
"Get some rest Ash." She leans down and places a soft kiss on my forehead.
"Spence…"
"Shhh…sleep. I'll see you in the morning." She gets up and walks out of my room shutting the door quietly behind her.
"I love you Spencer," I whisper into the dark room right before closing my eyes and sleeping overcoming me.