Chapter 7: Cat's POV Next Day

I wake up the next morning happier than I've felt in a long time. I was so excited to see Josh, but then the dread settled in. What if he changed his mind over night? He didn't want to kiss me, he just felt bad. Shit.

I get ready for school and start walking on autopilot, worrying about today the entire time. I walk towards me and Josh's spot and realize he's not there waiting for me. My heart instantly falls.

"Great," I say to myself, "now he doesn't want to be around me at all."

Just like my first day, I enter school by myself with my head down. The morning passes and I don't see Josh. I head to the band room during lunch. As I approach the door, I hear what sounds like someone crying. I open the door and see Josh in the corner of the room. He's crying and there's blood everywhere. I rush over.

"Josh! What happened?" I then notice that his sleeves are rolled up and his arms are covered in cuts, scars, and needle-tracks. I look on the ground next to him and see a needle and a razor. As soon as he notices me, he wipes away his tears and struggles to sit up.

"Oh Josh," I cry. "Why didn't you tell me?"

"I didn't want to lose you," he whispers.

"You're not going to lose me because of this," I comfort him. "We all have our problems," I say as I roll up my sleeves and show him my arms. He looks at the cuts and scars that cover my arms.

"Not you too Cat," he says sadly. "You don't deserve this."

"Neither do you Josh," I tell him as I wrap my arms around him.

"Cat," Josh whispers in my ear, "kiss me." It comes out more as a demand than a question. And I instantly oblige. This kiss is much less rough than our first. Our lips move together softly, trying to comfort each other. My hands find their way to his hair when his tongue slips into my mouth. We kiss like this for several minutes but then Josh pulls away.

"Thank you, for not leaving me."

"I'll never leave you Josh," I say as I lean down to kiss him once more.

Josh's POV: Same Morning as Cat's POV

This morning started off great. I woke up earlier than usual and decided I could get to school early to wait for Cat. I sit in our normal spot waiting for her to get there when Haley and her bitches show up.

"So Josh," she starts, "Your girlfriend leave you already?" I stare strait ahead, determined to ignore her but she doesn't stop. "Not even a screw-up like her would want you. You're just a worthless piece of shit." Her words were tearing me apart, but I didn't let her see that. I refused to acknowledge that she was even there. I guess she got bored of harassing me, because she left after that.

I try not to think about what Haley said, but part of me agrees with her. Cat deserves so much better. Why would she want to be with me? Yesterday was probably just a mistake. She didn't mean to kiss me. I felt my anxiety crash over me in waves as I stood up and rushed to the band room, tears streaming down my face. I sat down and opened my bag, finding everything I had to make me forget. I start with the needle, filling it up and bringing it to my arm. I tighten my belt around my arm and find a vein, quickly injecting the drug. Once I start to feel the effects of the drug, I pick up my blade and make several strait gashes across my arms sobbing the entire time. Between the blood loss and the drugs I was getting lightheaded. I don't know how long I sat there, but someone found me.

"Josh! What happened?" oh no it's Cat. I wipe away my tears hoping she didn't see me crying, as I struggle to sit up. Then I look down and realize my sleeves are still rolled up and Cat can see my arms.

"Oh Josh," she cries. "Why didn't you tell me?"

"I didn't want to lose you," I whisper.

"You're not going to lose me because of this," she says softly. "We all have our problems." She rolls up her sleeves and shows me her arms. I look at the cuts and scars that cover her skin. Why would she do this to herself?

"Not you too Cat," I say sadly. "You don't deserve this."

"Neither do you Josh," she tell me as she wraps her arms around me. But she's wrong, I do deserve this.

"Cat," I whisper in her ear, "kiss me." I need to forget the pain. She leans down and presses her lips to mine. This kiss is much less rough than our first. Our lips move together softly, trying to comfort each other. Her hands find their way to my hair when my tongue slips into her mouth. We kiss like this for several minutes but then I pull away. I have to say something.

"Thank you, for not leaving me."

"I'll never leave you Josh," she says, leaning down to kiss me once more.