Chapter 07
Twenty minutes they arrived at their dorm and Casey got in the shower. Jane just stripped down her clothes and put on a tanktop before she crawled in bed. She listened to the shower but couldn't stop thinking about Maura. What was she doing here? Was it because of her? Did she wanna kill her? Was that why she was here? So many thoughts were rushing through her head.
Casey came out without a towel on after a while. She was puffing her hair with that towel. She moved around the bed, bent over and stuck her ass in Jane's face. She smiled a little. She was trying to distract from Jane's distant expression.
Jane returned the smile. She reached over to Casey and grabbed her thigh, pulling her close to her. She pulled her down by the arm and kissed her lips.
"I'm not in the mood for sex now...too much is going on in my head at the moment. I just wanna sleep in your arms, okay?"
"Right," Casey said with a soft smile. She shook her head fast and then flipped from Jane to the bed. She snuggled into it and opened her arms to the woman.
"Arms are all ready for you and please talk to me if you need to. That's what I am here for..."
"I know." Jane said and snuggled up to her girlfriend.
"You know what she did to me...you know why I left the city...you know all this. I just thought I'd never see her again...and now I did...I don't know how to feel about this." She said.
"It's a huge campus Jane...We can move off campus if you want to. Odds are, you won't run into her again," she said, absently stroking her girlfriend's cheek and hair. She sighed deeply.
"I will be with you a lot. I mean we are both going to go into the academy... right?"
"Yeah we will." Jane agreed and kissed her. "I hope you are right...the campus is huge, I hopefully won't run into her again." Jane whispered and closed her eyes. Casey always managed to calm her down. Soon enough, Jane felt asleep.
By morning Casey was gone. She left a note for Jane and a kiss on that note and had left for work. Jane would wake to a knock at her dorm room door. Maura waited, but when no one answered, she slipped a note under the door. It was for Jane. The note was about two pages and said a lot of things ranging from illness reason, actions, apologies, etc. Maura turned and started down the hall.
The door suddenly opened and Jane looked outside, her hair all tousled.
"Hey, sorry. I'm here." Jane called after the blonde, to get her attention. She had no idea what the blonde wanted but figured it had something to do with school. She didn't know yet it was Maura.
Maura paused and turned around to face Jane.
"Read the note. It will explain everything. I have to go," Maura said and turned back around and started walking down the hall again. She fought the voices as hard as she possibly could.
Jane now noticed the note down by her feet. She picked it up and looked after Maura in wonderment. She went back inside the dorm and opened the letter. She read through it and was surprised about Maura's words. It didn't sound like the Maura she knew at all. Maybe she was still in therapy and did a 12 step programme or something and apologizing to Jane was one step.
Maura moved down the steps, knowing that by now, Jane had seen the letter she wrote. She meant some of it, maybe. She half smiled and dropped her sunglasses down as she stepped outside. The sun was bright, but the air was crisp and cold. She pulled her jacket around her small frame a little tighter and looked around before she stepped off the landing.
It was a couple of days later when Jane was in the library for research reasons, as she spotted Maura. She was sitting at a table and was reading through something. Jane glanced over to her every now and then playing with the thought to get over there and talk to her about the letter. It took her almost ten minutes before she got up and walked over to her. She cleared her throat to get her attention.
"I...read your letter." Jane said matter of factly.
Maura blinked and slowly looked up. That's when Jane saw her eyes. They were so strikingly different. They were cool and soft. Maura just stared at Jane and then nodded.
"Good. You didn't believe a word of it...did you?" She said with no amount of anger in her words.
Jane shrugged her shoulders.
"It was kinda hard to believe...but I hope you meant what you wrote. I hope you are better now, honestly. I never wished you any harm before...you know." Jane said matter of factly. "I guess, thanks for the letter..."
Maura nodded and stood. That movement startled Jane regardless of her best efforts. Maura furrowed her brow. "
I am just putting away a book, Jane. What did you think I was going to do? Attack you? Hurt you? Touch you in some way," she asked her, curious.
"Well you've always been unpredictable. I am just pre-cautious." Jane said and watched her.
"I guess everyone would be here if they knew about your past. I assume you didn't tell anyone." The brunette said matter of factly.
"And if you want it to stay this way, you will keep staying away from me and Casey." Jane said.
Maura paused as Jane mentioned Casey. She turned to her.
"What do I even have to say Jane? Why would I say anything? That was the past, right? Casey...so that is her name. Mmm, well, that's sweet. I am glad that you found someone, but honestly Jane, no one will ever be good enough for you..."
"What is that supposed to mean again? You don't know her. She makes me happy and she is exactly what I deserve." The brunette said matter of factly and looked straight into Maura's eyes.
"I didn't say anything about deserving her. I said that she will never be good enough for you. I am the only one that is good enough for you, but you decided to throw me away," she said slightly bitter. She moved back to the table and looked down at an open book. They were medical books.
Jane glanced down at her books and wondered what courses she took on College.
"You don't know if Cas is good enough for me or not. Lemme tell you this, she is more than good enough for me. She is everything I've ever dreamed of. Everything that you are not and ever will be. Just because you wrote me a letter doesn't mean I will forgive you or forget what you did." Jane pointed out.
Maura looked up and her face was still flat. Her left eye twitched a little at Jane's words and her nose flared a moment, trying to calm herself down from Jane's words. She licked her lips.
"I could be even better for you... I would be better for you. She is a child...I am a woman. You deserve that."
Jane sighed and placed her hands on the edge of the desk, looking down to Maura.
"What is it that you think you are perfect for me? Why can't you look for another girl? Why me? It's no co-incidence you are at the same College is it? You found out I am here..." Jane said.
"Of course I did. I just want to be close to you Jane," she said, reaching a hand out to touch Jane's. She half smiled at her, before she drew her hand back.
"I want to be your life, but you have found someone else. That's ok..." she said and stood up. She shut her book and brought it to her chest.
"Just enjoy her until she finds someone else that is better..."
Jane scoffed.
"Even if Casey would break up with me, US will never happen, Maura. I'd understand it if I keep giving you mixed signals but I am not. I am telling you that I don't want you. I left Boston because of you." Jane said and looked at her.
Maura's eye twitched again and she tightened her jaw, forcing herself to smile.
"Fine. Jane, fine," she said tensely and then turned to walk toward the side exit. "Have a nice afternoon," she managed after a few steps. She moved faster once she saw the door get closer. Her heart was pounding and the voices were screaming. A few tears fell down her cheeks in anger.
Jane looked after her and sighed. She moved back to her table and sat down to continue reading the book. Jane knew it. Maura had come here just because she was here. At least she seemed less crazy than she used to be. That was a start.
Later that night Casey, stepped into their room. She found Jane at her desk. She smiled and walked up behind her, hugging her.
"I could use some love, Jane...been one of those days," she said and sighed into the girl's dark head of curls. It had been a hard day at work.
"Oh I am sorry honey." Jane said and turned around, pulling Casey on her lap. "Did you had to serve some dicks at work today?" Jane asked and laid an arm around her gently.
"Rough customers...god," she groaned and dropped her head on Jane's shoulder. She closed her eyes and sighed.
"I am soo glad to be home with you...so glad," she said and kissed at Jane's neck. "Plus I missed you... a lot today..."
"I missed you too." Jane said and kissed her.
"Casey..." Jane then said and gave her knee a squeeze. "You know you are a pretty girl and...there are alot of pretty girls around campus...do you ever...you know think about hooking up with one of them? Do you ever think about leaving me? Do you ever think...you could do better than me?" Jane asked and looked in her eyes.
Casey's mouth parted in shock at what Jane had just said. She pulled back slightly, blinking at her.
"Jane...for one...you are gorgeous...far more than I am...you are tall and so sexy. I am lucky to have you. I don't ever forget that. I could never do better than you. If we could...I would take you as my wife..."
Jane smiled at her. Stupid Maura for making her insecure.
„I could never do better than you either." She said with a big smile and kissed her lips. „Thanks I needed to hear it." Jane said and gave her hand a squeeze.
„Well tomorrow is my shift at the café I hope I won't get any annoying costumers who complain about every little thing."
"I can come in and sit there after my class is over with in the afternoon. Keep you company when it gets slow...helping if need be," she said and lited her head and smiled.
"Glad I could make you smile. That's my job, after all... To love you..." she said and cupped Jane's face before she kissed her.
"Hon, you don't have to do that. Enjoy your day off work." Jane said and kissed her back.
"Or study for the upcoming exams or anything. Don't spend your day off sitting at work." Jane said with a smile.
"I want to be with you. That's what I want..." she said and nuzzled her, before resting against her.
"You have a good day..." she asked, staring out into the room and smiled at their pushed together twin beds. She sighed softly.
"Yeah. I got alot of work done today." Jane said with a smile. "I missed you though." Jane kissed her cheek.
"Do you wanna do something tomorrow night? Going to the movies or something?" She asked Casey.
Casey's eyes lit up. "Yes! Definitely! You and me...nothing else...but, right now...how about we..." she slipped from Jane's lap and started to unzip her skit, arching an eyebrow at her. She slightly pulled down her skirt to show her stomach. Casey smiled and slowly backed away from Jane.
Jane grinned. She didn't need to be told twice. She was in bed with Casey the next moment and made sweet love to her. All the time she had Maura in the back of her mind and the things she had said to her. She really loved Casey and she could please her just the way Jane liked it.
Casey's body moved against hers in the same way that Jane's did to hers. She moaned and arched her back as she came. She wrapped her arms around Jane and let herself go.
Making love to her girlfriend had gotten better as time had moved on, but then...it had never been not good from the beginning. Finally, she laid there with the woman and stroked hair from her face, breathing slowly, but deeply.
Jane fell asleep that night with Casey in her arms. And for the first time in a year she had nightmares again that night. Jane got up the next morning, rather exhausted and made her way to the café to work.
TBC
Mh what will happen the next day in the café? Will Maura be there? Find out tomorrow.