Itsy-Bitsy-Kidsy
WARNING! Chapter contains: OOCness, the usual ridiculous humor, nothing new. DISCLAIMER! One Piece is not mine. This fanfiction is.
Hello, did you miss me? *Gets slaughtered* Yes, I am late, but I had shit to do. I also went twice as insane as I was before. Okay, since I got so many excellent reviews for chapter 8, I'll respond to them in a different format.
KitChi-Who knew Hawkins' cards could be so vague? Naw, he din't know, but it was super obvious! (Not everyone can trollface like Kid!) Killer hasn't seen the last of my cruelty! MWAHAHAHA-*cough~cough* Thanks for another awesome review!
meka18-Thanks!
Snowiki-I make stupid shit happen in the most retarded of ways. I caught the drift, and I'll try to make it a little bit more saucy~! Law has probabaly never cared what civilians think about him, and his fangirls just ignore the illegal part of his career. I doubt that anyone could ever deny a baby girl any attention. I actually designed his "punishment" after one of my baby pictures! Thank you for the ever-amazing feedback!
KimiKumicu-*JAWDROP* I am 1000% on board! Enjoy it!
Vampire Revan-Hawkins is one step away from man-lady. Well, she's got some psycho-ass powers... Thanks!
Akin D.-It could've ended worse for all of them, so Law has to be a little grateful. Baby crossdressing is just too much fun! Thanks for da review!
18plusForMe-Touché. I should thank you for reading it, and I am. I'm glad I have so many great fans!
Silverwoulf-Yes, Law is a terrible man. A terrible, incredibly sexy man. Just wait a little longer to find out! THANK YOU SO MUCH FOR SPREADING THE WORD! Damn, I hope I'm not too late...
KawaiiOwO-Uh...I forgot! Thanks!
Shiary-I love hearing those words~! Mega thanks~!
Natsuki Akari-I think that was the best line sequence in this whole story. Oh, that's so sweet of you to say!
Lilywonders-Uguu~! You're far too kind to meh! I hope I was fast enough! (The squeals feel good, don't they?)
A.E. Stover-In case the messaging didn't work, I'll tell you here: HOLY. SHIT. I'm glad that you love it so much, and I'm delighted to let you use this. But, there should be about one more chapter, so you might want to see how it all ends before you use it. Seriously, you will need to. Mother of God, this is amazing for me... I'll check out your fic as soon as I can!
trypheria-While I'm glad that you saw my profile, I have to be frank: You were spot-on with the "Lot on my plate" thing. But, the idea intrigues me. However, just to be safe, by "M-Rated" did you mean IvaxLaw romance? Sex, I mean. Please clarify, and thanks so much for the love!
OHHH~! I don't deserve you all! This is like a high one can only feel with success and a little bragging! YOU ALL MAKE ME BLUSH SO HARD! I 3 U!
It was dark in the medical ward when Law came to. Eddie has called the night before, telling him that they had Jewelry Bonney and they should rendezvous at high noon to turn Kid back into his angry, alcoholic self. Speaking of which, he was snoozing in the crib next to the green-sheeted bed, so fucking cute that it made Law's heart throb in that special way that only something adorable can provoke. To top it off, he was in the pink sleeper, with the hat, making him look like a plushie. They had both demanded that Kid needed to stay close, and since Law was still on painkillers and a transfusion, a few crewmembers moved the baby bed into the infirmary.
It was around four a.m., and the only light was coming off the EKG machine, which beeped steadily. Funny, really, since a mother's heartbeat is like a lullaby to fetuses, and Kid had barely stirred with Law's echoing slightly through the room. Acting on impulse, the latter reached out to his right side, needles and all, to caress the redhead's shoulder—he was sleeping on his side. He curled into the familiar touch, making cute, little noises that made Law melt all over again.
"Eustass-ya…" he whispered. "No matter what form you're in, I will always love you." Before Law could confess his desires to deaf ears, the medication took affect again, and the tattoo captain was asleep again, arm still hanging into Kid's crib. Later on that night, Bepo had snuck in to check on his friend and captain, only to see the chibi'd rival cuddling with Law's hand. Needless to say, he left seconds later.
They both slept well. Law dreamt of being in the North Blue, enjoying his favorite pastime (that wasn't medically-related), snowboarding. He was tearing it up one the mountains when his favorite person in the world dropped in: Eustass Kid. They were in perfect synchronization, weaving through the course with ease and sneaking provocative grins in when they could. As the trail began to end, Law had the insane notion that he had to show off for the fellow captain, seeing as the slopes had been his territory since he could walk. As the frosted landscape sped by even faster, Law heard Kid call out to him.
"Law, look out!" As the darker-skinned man turned his head forward again, he caught a flash of the frozen, splintery stump in front of him before he crashed. He lay in a twisted wreck up against another tree until Kid maneuvered over to him, worry plastered on his face. Wordlessly, the redhead plucked him up in arms, holding him close, but not painfully so. "Are you hurt?"
"My ankle, it took the impact; probably sprained it, if not worse." His joint was twisted in an off angle, and Law's pants had ripped on the stump. Blood trickled slightly, and Law whimpered in pain. Kid sighed, held his rival tight, snapped a branch off of a nearby tree, and splinted the break. He ripped more of Law's pant fabric to use as a bandage, but wrapped Law in his outer coat, much to the skinny man's protest. Kid carried him into town, took him to the doctor (his mom) and lugged him to his house.
"How foolish of you…" Kid breathed huskily as he laid Law down on the bed. Inching closer and closer, their lips closed in on each other.
Law woke up right before they kissed. Damn.
Kid's dream was much simpler. He beat the Celestial Dragons that hurt Law in reality as the latter clung to his chest, whimpering. It was a win-win for Eustass: he got revenge on those bastards, and got Law as a super uke. He supported him with one arm while he tortured the so-called Saints with the other. He woke up right after they checked into the nearby hotel for a "health check."
Perverted little fucker.
Well, despite what his dream was about to become, Kid was irreversibly tired when Law nudged him awake, and he fell back to sleep moments later. Law sighed, his eyes aching with longing to be closed again. His homemade sedative/painkillers really did the trick—he had to have been out for more than the entire night. But, the night was over, and rosy sunshine was gleaming through the thick portholes in the Heart submarine, casting soft, eye-pleasing shadows. Morning always was Law's favorite time of day…
"Ah~!" the darker skinned man hissed in pain as he moved his leg off the bed and on to the floor. It wasn't really pain, so to speak, so much as the sudden shock of movement and the bizarre tingling one gets when he or she drops their foot too quickly. (A/N: Grammar Nazi!) There lied another problem: pants. The plaster came up close to his hip, so he could cut the ripped side off at the top and wear it normally. Yeah, that would work; now all he needed were his jeans and some scissors.
But both were across the room. No crutches in sight, and the IV stand was long gone; plus, he was still attached to the machine. The string of curses that flew out from Law's mouth were so vulgar and shameless could have made Kid blush, if he were conscious at the time. Not wanting to embarrass himself by trying to cross the room unassisted, the Surgeon of Death lay back down, and stared at the water colored ceiling. The pale pinks and gold's were beautiful, reflecting into his ship with angelic grace.
Dear God. I sound like Luna. Maybe Lindsey, but she always said she never had the time to sentimental… Law dragged out his mental conversation as long as he could, just to entertain himself. He laced his fingers behind his head, stretching out, but it was mostly to see how long and how well-made his cast was. The verdict: Too long for his liking, and it was top-notch. After all, he trained all of his nakama first aid and basic surgical skills in case the shit really hit the fan and Law was incapacitated.
Like what happened just yesterday! Sometimes the Heart captain wondered if he was cursed by some kind of death reaper he cheated or offended in one of his many life-saving or life-ending performances. Or maybe it was just Murphy's Law… Either way, life loved to screw with the rookie just like everyone else in the world. Actually, when he thought about it, Kid getting his ass turned into a baby might not have been such a bad thing—the chances of both Supernova making it through the New World long enough to meet again were slim.
"The very second this thing is off my leg and he's back to normal, we hook up," Law declared aloud, unaware of how delicate a situation like that really was. (What if Kid didn't like him like that?) Only seconds later did Penguin slip into help his captain prepare for the big day ahead. It scared the raven-haired man so much he jerked upwards and accidentally landed his leg on the metal base of the bed. Yet again, he cussed up a storm. It was going to be such a fun morning!
"How's Killer-san doing?" Bat-chan inquired, pulling Eddie to the side. The blue-skinned man sighed, exhausted by the attempt of capturing Jewelry Bonney and keeping Killer calm. His fever had spiked right after apprehending the pink-haired bitch, causing him to hallucinate; Eddie found him curled into a ball and rocking on the balls of his feet. The bodice-wearing crewmate had slung him over his shoulder and threw him into bed. Getting medicine into him was another, traumatizing experience that would never be brought up ever again so long as he lived.
"He could be better, but I think he's fully aware of his surroundings. I'm just hoping he doesn't lose it and throw everything off. Jewelry's been stubborn up to this without any 'convincing.'" Eddie replied in his usual gravelly voice. As if on cue, the wild blond partially staggered up onto the deck, still mask-free, muttering something about being fine and to lay off. Eddie sighed again and looked out to the sea; Bonney's own crew was within a hundred yards or more of them, anxiously awaiting her return. If she cooperated with their demands, she could leave in one piece.
They sieged her ship right as it sank for Fishman Island, dragging her off in sea stone cuffs and chains. Killer was still incapacitated, but they had escaped without any age-related malfunctions, thank God. Bonney was, at the moment, hissing and spitting at crewmates that passed her by, pissed that she was tied down to the mast. However, she was totally still when no one was around.
The female rookie had her fair share of tricks up her sleeves…
"I fuchi'g hay yoo. Yoo wiw die whem dis is ova. Yoo shouwd 'owe da by 'ow…" (I fucking hate you. You will die when this is over. You should know that by now…) Kid seethed as Law fitted him into the sling. Law chose to humiliate him one last time and dressed him in a baby-blue shirt with the words "BAD BOY" in childish scrawl on the front. Along with the junior graphic tee, he bore light grey shorts and cute, little booties—utterly adorable, but not as much as the panda sleeper. The perpetrator who dressed him in such a horrific manor was now fitting his armpits into crutches and trying to see if the cutoff of his pant leg was too short.
"Are you ready, Eustass-ya?" he questioned upon securing everything. Pouting slightly, he nodded, more than ready to return to normal and have Law's juicy, hot ass. As the ship gained speed underwater and headed towards Kid's own, he pondered how his crew had gotten along without him. God forbid it went like last time… But, still tired, he nodded off in the flannel sack against Law's firm chest.
The yellow sub surfaced in just minutes within jumping distance from the skeleton-decorated deck. But, since the captain could barely walk three steps, Bepo gathered him up in his furry, erm, arms and launched onto the opposite deck. The landing wasn't exactly graceful, but it worked. Suave as ever, Law stood up out of his former pet's paws, held his crutch out in front of him and stepped in front of Eddie, who was the closest. The awkwardness was palpable—Kid was a snoozing infant, happy as could be in his rival's lethal-but-gentle hold. A soft whisper travelled through some of the crewmates by the opposite side of the ship, but things stayed relatively silent.
"So, where is Jewelry-ya?" the tattooed man questioned, gratingly casual. Eddie pointed to the wooden post she was chained to, looking exhausted. Law nodded, wary of the entire crew's actions. "Where's Killer-ya? Shouldn't he be here?"
"I'm right here," a rather hoarse voice responded. Turning his head to find the source, Law found the scarred man leaning almost completely into the lower deck doorframe. Killer panted slightly and pushed himself away from the wall, staggering over like a drunkard. A cloud of nervousness hung over the ship. The awkward had been well replaced…
"You look like hell," the Heart captain blurted. He obviously didn't regret it, seeing as he kept a flawless poker face. Killer smirked, subconsciously moving a hand to his hip in a very sassy manor.
"Yeah… The fuck happened to you?" Killer motioned a scythe-free hand at the plaster monstrosity smothering Law's right leg. Irritation made itself clear on the captain's face.
"I'll explain later," Law forced through his teeth. He turned to Bepo and gave a stiff nod. The kung-fu animal jumped up back onto the top level of the sub, grabbed Kid's coat and such, and returned to the gathering before a minute had ticked by. Suddenly, Kid himself came to, mind clear as crystal.
"Did yoo ge' my suff bach fwom hew?" (Did you get my stuff back from her?) He directed towards Killer. The latter was confused as to what his captain said exactly, but got the gist of it.
"Yeah, you're weapons' belt and boots waiting for you downstairs," the messy blond answered. "Let's get this fucking show on the road." Killer declared as he strode over to Bonney and unlocked her main restraint. Her wrists were still in sea stone cuffs and a chain wrapped around her waist, so Killer was completely unconcerned. Maybe it was the pounding headache, but he suddenly didn't giving a flying about anything; sooner Kid returned, the better. Law set the redhead on the deck, ready for his quick increase in size.
"Bich, if yoo twy amyfi'g fummy, I wiw swaugh'ew yoo." (Bitch, if you try anything funny, I'll kill you.) Kid snarled as intimidatingly as he could. The bared baby teeth and sunken 'eyebrows' were laughable—however, Bonney just blew her bangs out of her eyes. Unharmed, but missing her precious hat, she had been snatched and had the stone bracelets snapped on her before she could turn the Kid Pirate crew into old men and children. As soon as Eddie had one of his swords at her throat, Bonney's own nakama backed off. Bat-chan promised her safe return later on.
Something in the big eater's eyes worried Eddie... Like she saw it coming and had a plan…
Just to make matters worse for the dreadlock-wearing crewmate, Killer was too emotionally unstable to warn. But there he was, holding Jewelry Bonney on a leash just feet from himself. Kid sat on the wooden floor expectantly, ready to unleash hell and all its damnation on all living beings from there to the other side of the Red Line. Killer carefully removed the first cuff, wary of her movements.
"You do this right, you can leave," he warned, voice a tad shaky. Sweat dripped along the thin scar on his face from his fever—if something were to happen, he would be too weak to fight. Eddie was nearby, both blades drawn and ready for anything. The chain around Bonney's stomach tightened, and the second half of the handcuffs fell free. She rubbed her chaffed wrists, shot Kid a dirty look, and placed her hands in front of herself, pointed directly at the redhead.
"Just so you bastards know, it's a little bit harder to turn people back," she whispered. What sounded like a popgun shot amplified to an earsplitting level rang out and inky black smoke simultaneously appeared. Everyone was blinded; ripping fabric and the rattling of chains was heard. "Son of a bitch!" Bonney screamed. She tugged her restraint out from Killer's hand, spun around, and kicked him in the head as hard as she could. He crumpled onto the deck, unconscious.
As chaos ensued, Kid's body grew back to his normal age. However, the process was immensely painful, as if his bones were being stretched and the rest of him was following in suit. On his knees, he shivered, body racking with pain. He couldn't scream as the fiery sensation traveled through his nervous system. Writhing on the deck, he struggled to breathe normally and began to pass out from both his closing airway and the overwhelming pain. With a loud thud, Kid collapsed forward, fully grown but unseen in Jewelry's escape attempt.
In actuality, the only side-effect of turning a person back to their original age was the uncontrollable hunger Bonney always succumbed to. It happened whenever she changed her own age, and since it was her main attack strategy, the female rookie was never full. Strangely enough, she kept her word to the crew; the suffering Kid was subjected to was what happened to Bonney whenever she tried messing with ages early on in her career. When she was still getting used to her Devil Fruit power, it hurt like hell for both de- and re-aging. She simply hadn't thought of torturing the redhead during their fight.
"See ya later, dumbass!" Bonney yelled out as her own crew rescued her. With the impenetrable cover still swirling around the Kid Pirate ship, they were oblivious to the harpoon flying at them. It had a large chunk of lightweight foam on the end of the barb, which Bonney dove to when it landed by her captors' ship. Floating back to safety, she flipped her enemies off as she was tugged away. She still had the chain wrapped around her waist. That would be difficult to remove without bloodshed.
Law was knocked off his already unsteady feet as the splash waves rocked the boat. Ignoring the sore spot on his side, the dark-skinned man wiped the reflexive tears from his eyes and scoured the midnight-colored deck for Kid. When the boat lurched a second time, he stopped moving.
"What just happened?" Bat-chan cried as the smokescreen cleared. Everything was quiet for a nanosecond as Jewelry Bonney sailed away. The Heart pirates were too stunned to move off their ship, just as Law blankly stared at the scene in front of him. Killer was out cold with blood trickling from his brow line, and a fully-grown and very naked Eustass Kid was facedown with his eyes rolling into his head.
"Eustass-ya!" Law gasped, shocked by (his gorgeous body) the state he was in. He quickly belly crawled over to the comatose redhead. Flipping him over and ignoring the fact that Kid was now packing a dick that was roughly the size and color of a beluga whale, Law attempted to wake him up. Eddie was at his side in moments, both covering Kid with his coat and helping Bepo lift him up. "Take him back to my ship; Killer, too. I'll treat them both."
"Fine, but I'm coming with you," Eddie bargained. Bat-chan had Killer in his arms, just as Bepo did with Kid. Both were handed off to Jean Bart and then to gurneys as Law awaited his turn to enter his own ship. One polar bear ride later, the raven-captain was examining two other Supernovas for injuries. Killer was easy: he was still sick and had a concussion. Nothing bed rest and painkillers couldn't fix.
Kid, on the other hand, was a mystery. He was exactly the same as the seconds before Jewelry Bonney changed him, just asleep and with no sign of waking up. All they could do was wait and see. With time given, Law chose to dress Kid from the waist down—it was a very interesting experience.
"Fuck it all!" the North Blue captain swore for the fifth time in a row. He hadn't even gotten Kid's underwear anywhere near where it should have been, but Law was standing over the scrub sink trying to staunch the nosebleed of his lifetime. Earlier, he had been too concerned with the redhead's well-being to notice the massive amount of spectacular muscle and penis Kid suddenly had to go pervert on him. Or any time they had been together in recent weeks. But, with the diagnosis set and Eddie not around, he couldn't help himself—one look at his bare, god-like body and everything Law had fantasized about and more flooded his sex-starved mind.
"I can do this…" Law muttered as he stuffed cotton up his nostrils. But, he didn't get far; one rip of the green sheets away from his body, and Law tasted blood. It was so uncomfortable! To add fuel to the fire, Killer began to stir in the next bed over, scaring the crap out of the Heart captain. "Damn it…! Okay, this must be done, and now!"
In a ridiculous blur of yellow and red, Law dressed Kid just enough to give him some decency. When he stopped spinning, Law sighed and sat down on the redhead's bed.
I spend two weeks feeding him and cleaning him, but when he's back to normal, I can't help myself. Law put his face in his hand, suddenly exhausted by his recent efforts. This has been one of my stranger days... Whatever, time to check up on Killer-ya. Carefully standing back up, the doctor grabbed a penlight and a chart to record Killer's reactions.
"Oi, rise and shine, Killer-ya," Law insisted as he tapped on the blonde's exposed face. He didn't arise immediately, allowing Law to do a little face exploring. Aside from the scar that ran from his hairline to his chin, there were stich marks around his eyebrows and chin; a small piece of his left ear was torn away. He was still an attractive man, but with his alley-cat like demeanor, he seemed a little more ferocious. Without the bucket over his head, that is…
"Wha…?" he murmured, disoriented. Instantly, his head throbbed, and he reached for the heavy bandaging around it. Law pushed his hand back down and kept him from moving. "The fuck happened?"
"Well, Killer-ya, when Jewelry-ya kicked you in the head, she gave you a mild concussion. Eustass-ya's back to normal, by the way," Law droned as he pried the Massacre Soldier's eyes open. When he tested them the first time, they were a cloudy green and, of course, uneven. Now, they were a sharp, breathtaking emerald. They stood out against the rest of his face, large and round, giving him a bi-polar facial structure. After some ogling, and Killer swatting his hand away, Law got on with the examination. "First off, any nausea, headache, or blurred vision?"
"Yes, no, and I wish," he muttered, exhausted form the weeks prior and his most recent tragedy.
"Okay, question time; name?" Law began, one hell of an eager beaver for something as trivial as a neurological exam.
"Killer," the blond grumbled, upset about being awoken and having to do through something so ridiculous.
"Age?" Law continued while scratching notes on a clipboard.
"Twenty-four," Killer sighed, sitting up perfectly straight. He was tempted to sucker punch the doctor and go back to sleep, but he knew that things wouldn't end well if he did.
"Occupation?" the Heart captain continued, almost too quickly.
"First Mate on the Kid Pirate ship," the scythe-user was starting to be annoyed.
Location?" Law admitted to it being a tricky question, but it would determine how aware he really was. He also wanted to see his rival trip up on the quiz.
"Um, your ship," Killer paused and halfheartedly scanned the room, "specifically, your sick bay. Are we done yet?"
"No. Height and weight?" this was more of a crapshoot on awareness, but Law was curious for a reaction.
"Figure it out yourself and none of your business," the blond growled, more than a little irked.
"Last one: sexual orientation?" His tone was perfectly even, but Law was giggling like a naughty schoolgirl on the inside.
"Your mother," Killer deadpanned and flopped back onto the mattress. He was out like a light, snoring softly and contently, if that was possible.
"Smartass…" the tattooed man pouted. But Killer passed the test, which was all that mattered, aside from Law's bizarre form of entertainment. He plucked the crusty tissue out from his nose since the bleeding had stopped and tossed it in the biohazard bin, bored once gain. As he pulled a chair up next to Kid, he propped his plastered ankle on the bed, ready for a catnap, when Kid woke up.
"Whoa!" he yelled, sitting straight up. Law, greatly spooked, stumbled off his swivel chair and onto the sheets in front of the redhead, who was trying to take in everything around him. "Trafalgar? What the fuck happened? Wait—I'm back to normal!" he rejoiced.
"Yes, you are—MMPH!" the Heart captain was cut off as Kid had snatched him up into his arms and was absolutely smothering his open mouth with his own. It was a messy French kiss, and Law tasted like coffee and mint. The smaller man was taken by huge surprise, but slowly began to enjoy it, inching his own tongue into Kid's and absorbing the emptiness. There was a faint flavor of strong liquor and something mild he couldn't quite place, but the thought became irrelevant as Kid broke it off for breath.
"You have no idea how long I've waited to do that," he panted ever so slightly, never being happier to have his deep, dangerous voice back.
"Same here," was Law's only reply. Their mouths found they're ways back to one another, and they shut the world out, too blissful and relieved to care about anything else in the world.
Hahaha! Little kissus for ya! I figured Bonney's power couldn't be all that easy to handle, so I made Kid suffer.
*SPOILER ALERT!* I planned to end this with my first-ever attempt at sex, but with my mom becoming more and more into this, and Law being injured, it will end with fluff. Yeah, momma doesn't know I like guyxguy. I hope she doesn't find out.
FOR THE LOVE OF GOD, REVIEW!
I DON'T KNOW WHAT I WOULD DO WITH MY LIFE IF I DIDN'T HAVE THIS STUFF!