Kitty: I haz no comment :3 SORRY I TOOK FOREVER. Damn boys taking up my time. DARN YOU, HIGH SCHOOL! *shakes fist at the sky*

Today has got to be both the best and the worst day of my life. For the negatives, I got raped by a sparkly Eddie-Cullen wannabe, molested by the twins, creeped out by mister 'Oh look at me, my black book is so awesome and I'm so stoic I'm cool,' tackle hugged by Phil (who thought I was Adele for some reason. Seriously, we may be identical twins, but we look absolutely nothing alike…wait, that made no sense…) and found out mister 'My black book is so damn cool I have the dirt on all of you my eyes are everywhere' technically owns my family's current income.

Now, onto the positives: I smelled like coffee all day thanks to Adele, got to eat cake with Honey, watch fangirls squeal over the twins and their totally fake brotherly love act (though it was hot…) and I got a new sister. I shall call her Phil, and she shall be mine, and she shall be my Phil.

And I don't care if you don't want to hear about how the twins molested me. I'm going to tell you anyway. Wait, I just broke the fourth wall…must stop that. Anyway, I was sitting peacefully with Honey and Mori, eating cake and discussing various sweets when I heard swooning. I happened to glance up, fork in mouth, to see the twins doing their thing. They glanced over at me and got this evil look in their eyes, then tried to drag me up to be with them.

"B-B-But my cake!" I stuttered, lodging my legs into place under the couch, one twin pulling on each arm.

"You can have your cake later, Addy. Come on, come play." They winked at me. Normally, I would have been ecstatic to go and cause trouble and mayhem, leaving the little guinea pig girls scars for the rest of their lives. But you do not, and I repeat, DO NOT try to get me to cause trouble while I'm eating my cake. It's like, a crime against Germany. He shall make you run track at top speed for hours. And I was not going to get up and move yet.

"UNHAND ME, YOU HOOLIGANS!" I screamed. They looked shocked for a second, like I reminded them of someone, before giving me one last hard tug. I flew up from the couch, knocking over the table and the delicious cake in the process.

Poor cake, your sacrifice was not in vain.

Now, I, being the crazed, deranged cake-lady I am, managed to become murderous. In other words, I channeled my inner mother and scolded the living shit out of the twins.

"HOW DARE YOU WASTE THE PRECIOUS CAKE!? I SHOULD HAVE YOU INCARCERATED FOR THIS CRIME AGAINST ALL THAT IS PURE AND DELICIOUS!" I screamed. Yes, my mother would have been quite proud of me and my need to use horribly large words to exaggerate my point, which in this case would be cake is not something to be messed with. Especially not my cake.

Well, correction. This is how it would have gone normally, had I not been in total shock and Kyoya didn't own me outright. So, I took the safest route possible, removed myself from the floor, and hid behind my beloved twin sister to avoid the impending madness that would be sure to follow. Which, as predicted, madness did follow, as I staggered to explain myself and my sister agreed to make me work in return for the debt the twins caused.

I never liked those gingers anyway…soulless buggers they were…

At any rate, fast forward to when Adele and I had finally gotten our crazy butts home and began caring for our darling ankle biters as always, except tonight was special. I would do my homework, which is virtually unheard of in the life and times of Addy.

"Adele~?"

"I know that tone of voice. What do you want now, phail ninja?"

"Can I copy the homework of the best twin sister to ever live in the entire universe?"

"No, but you can do your own homework."

"But Adele…"

"No butts. Hehe…butts." Adele then proceeded to go to her room and slam the door quite loudly, as if to prove her point and end the conversation. If you read all dialogue spoken by me in the whiniest, most annoying kid voice you have ever heard outside working retail, congrats, you figured out my technique for getting what I want.

I dropped down on my couch and pouted, pulling out my homework. My English homework was easy, seeing as it was most certainly my strong suit and kept me toward the top of the class, but my math…oh pasta, my math. That killed me.

"Oh glob. The world is coming to an end. Adalynn Gates, doing her homework? The apocalypse is upon us." An opportune moment for Adele to walk out to get a snack, all things considered. I glared at her from over my shoulder, trying hard to see if I could somehow put my frustration at my math into her soul and make her become the Hulk and go "ADELE SMASH" on our teacher, but alas, my plan was all in vain.

"Shut up."

"Keep glaring like that and your face will get stuck."

"It will no- OH HOLY GLOB. I'm stuck!" I laughed, which only succeeded in making Adele shake her head and take a bite out of an Oreo. Damn her for figuring out where I hid the delicious cookies. "MORTAL. THIS PLEASES ME. BRING MORE."

"Addy…you're not Thor, and I'm not Loki."

"That's what you wish me to think, brother, but I see past your tricks." This was said just as Adele returned and knocked me over the head with the package of Oreos. I squealed and dug in, practically drooling on my shirt and homework.

"Do they still accept homework, even if there's Addy spit all over it?"

"Pretty sure they have to. It's either they do, or they end up failing all the students who fall asleep on their papers and their parents aren't rich enough to buy their way into graduating with the rest of their class."

"So people like you."

"Pretty much."

Our night continued on like this until bedtime, at which point I was rudely awakened by my alarm clock screaming motivational speeches at me, which Mumsie had taken to after I had some bad incidences with bullies in middle school. She was convinced my self-esteem needed reassurance.

Bitch please, do I look like I need my ego stroked anymore than it already is?

Don't answer that. Not crazy.

I banged my hand on the "silence" button, successfully turning it off, rolled over, and attempted to go back to sleep. My plan failed, however, as my room had a window that faced the east, and every morning was like the opening scene of Lion King.

I hissed and clamored into the bathroom to get ready in the dark, every Addy's natural habitat in the early morning and late evening. My body ached all over, as it often did due to my piss-poor posture and tendency to sleep under my laptop at random points during the evening. Still, in spite of this, I did manage to get my butt clean, dressed, and ready to go before what was really necessary, which left me time to brew up a cup of Earl Grey tea with milk. Hey, every girl needed a break from coffee once in a while.

Adele met me downstairs and made a bit of a fish-face in shock (you know, where they open and close their mouths multiple times) before she seemed to decide it was far too early to argue with my craziness and we headed off to the chandelier sweatshop of doom.

"So, we've decided you're our new plaything, Addy~" Ginger Twin number one said to me as soon as I sat down. I didn't care which one was which. It was before ten o'clock on a weekday, so I really didn't care.

"Oh really? And you came to this revelation because…?" I trailed off. I only ever make sense when I'm only half awake, which is most mornings. This is when I did my most logical thinking and writing, as my brain wasn't cluttered with "ZOMG fanfictions and yaoi and internet memes and asdfjkl" the way it usually was. This, generally, meant it was easier to both talk to and annoy me for many reasons. Usually, it was just people with my own stupidity annoyed me first thing in the morning.

"Because we can get a rise out of you easier than we can with Haruhi~" Ginger Twin number two replied. I shook my head and rested on my desk, trying to get a nap in before class, which I hoped would be a video presentation day. This strand of thought trailed off on the bunny trail, which was surprisingly full of rainbows, poptarts, and cats for a bunny trail, until a sharp poke at my side managed to get me to wake back up.

"Hey Addy."

"What do you want, puny human?"

"It's a political debate day." That made me perk right up. I sat straight and listened to the chosen topics for the day's debates. The usual were there, with abortion, gay marriage, and free speech cases, but one more was thrown in for good measure. The topic? Gun laws.

And so, the normally mentally unstable Adalynn Gates became a strong adversary in the way of debating facts against many others around me. Politics had become my strong suit early on, and it was my dream to eventually be a true politician with knowledge of most laws and to be kept in close radar by my enemies.

A few guinea pig girls took the chance to try to break me down, but alas, my vast knowledge from spending far too much time on the internet, learning statistics from all over the world managed to trump any argument they could come up with. I think even the twins, Adele and Phil were impressed by my prowess and my ability to change the mood in the room.

As soon as the debate was over, though, I slumped right back into normal old "me" mode, plopped my head on my desk, and tried to fall asleep.

"Hikaru…I didn't know she could do that."

"Seems this'll be more fun than we thought, Kaoru."

"Would you two shut up and let me have my nap in peace?"

Kitty: Oh hey, look. A wild chapter has appeared. Yeesh...my lazy butt needs to start actually doing crap instead of sit around and look pretty.

Birdy: Pretty? Pfft...you obviously don't look in the mirror when you wake up.

Kitty: LOL I know. Blonde girl afro FTW.