Agent Tony's Reports

by MagicalMintBunnyInTheDark

Here is a complete copy of agent Tony's reports on the humans Alfred F. Jones and Arthur Kirkland as well as those surrounding them such as Matthew Williams. UsUk. Warnings: Implied sex and weird alien views of Earth. Hilarious interpritations. Matthew Williams is a first class threat. Rating changed for good reason.

11. Chapter 11

Warnings: Weird alien views of Earth

Glabcon: Tony's planet. In case you don't remember.

THIS IS GOING TO BE A MULTI-CHAPTER FIC. IT IS FAR FROM COMPLETION.

Disclaimer: Neither me nor Bunny own Hetalia or the characters portrayed in the anime

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LOGBOOK REPORT
AGENT TONY - STATIONED PLANET 1285 (EARTH) - HOME PLANET 24 (GLABCON)

As requested by my officer, I have sent a copy of my Earth Logbook. Here are all the things worth noting on planet Earth.

19: The average IQ of humans. They seem to be a rather stupid species.

AUTOMOBILE
Type of transportation used on Earth. Incredibly slow compared to Glabcon's transportation.

AWESOME
Type of substance found on planet 1285 (Earth). Please refer to "COMPOSURE REPORT #2" for more information.

BED
Sleeping habitat for humans. Ironically enough sexual intercourse is performed here too.

CAPTAIN AMERICA
A fictional superhero loved by all humans in the "United States of America" region on planet 1285 (Earth).

EYEBROWS
A pouch of hair that grows above the eye on humans.

FANBOY/FANGIRL
A type of human found throughout planet 1285 (Earth). Little information available besides they love anime, manga, pocky, and ramen.

HAMBURGERS
Food loved by humans in the "United States of America" region on planet 1285 (Earth).

KUMAJIRO
Deathly bear with unknown powers that belong to test subject 283 (Matthew Williams).

MCDONALDS
Structure found throughout planed 1286 that sells ready-to-eat food for what seems to be a cheap price. If we could take control of all these structures, we would have a main point to wage war on planet 1286 if we ever wanted.

TEST SUBJECT 284 (ARTHUR KIRKLAND)'S COOKING
Food cooked by test subject 284 (Arthur Kirkland). Though labeled food, this is definitely inedible for any organism. Avoid at all costs.

VODKA, DA?
A type of liquid on planet 1285 (Earth). Particularly special to humans in "Russia" region. See "HUMAN THREAT REPORT #1" section "THREAT #3" for more information

WATER PIPE
A tool used by test subject 290 (Ivan Braginski)'s weapon of choice. Long stick made of iron. Deathly; First-class threat. See "HUMAN THREAT REPORT #1" section "THREAT #3" for more information.

I plan to write more on most of these subjects.

Keep an eye out for my next report.

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A/N: Weird reports galore!

I know none of you guys care- but Magic is totally excited. She's getting an art tablet (finally) for Christmas! Wacom Bamboo Splash Tablet. :D

We love our reviews, so please review! Anything from "I like it" to "Go home MagicalMintBunnyInTheDark. You're drunk." will do! :D

~MagicalMintBunnyInTheDark~