OKAY READERS! I'm back on a roll. This chapter takes place about two years after the contents of the previous chapter. By The Way this is one of the last chapters... There's gonna be one after this and and an epilogue then that's it... But I do have a super huge surprise for you at the end. I'm sorry I've kept you waiting and I hope that you're still reading
So with out further ado...
Byakuya shut his eyes harshly to the pained screams of his wife. He should be happy that his child and hers was finally coming, but there was only the sad fact that he was forced to face: the child was originally due in May. It was December. Alone in his room, he could only convince himself that the pain she was going through was his fault. When she first discovered her pregnancy, she was ill. She had aggressive chest pains that usually had her bedridden. Before that, he let her rest often. It was one day in which he insisted she lie with him. She, being a dutiful wife, obliged.
When her nurse told him about Hisana's growing child, she also came with the obvious news that her condition was precarious, and that she should be resting constantly. He remembered when he had first went to visit her during her lying in. His beloved Hisana was as pale and wan as the moon. He couldn't look at her without getting lumps in his throat and stomach. She still, despite her illness found time to smile and joke with him. Unfortuneatly, his sceduale with the Thirteen Court Guard Squads was going more and more hectic, so he had less time to see her. By the time he came home, she was soundly asleep. And if she was awake, it was usually an emergency.
Byakuya paced about his room a bit to calm his nerves. He didn't know why he had been nervous since he had already though of the worse case scenario for Hisana: the child would be lost. It wasn't as if the child could survive at only five months of growth, so he prepared himself for her eminent sorrow. He didn't understand himself when it came to his nonchalance regarding the child's death. he simply felt that worse things could cause his heart to break. The worst scenario for himself was the thought that Hisana might die. He couldn't comprehend her death as much as he could comprehend a life without air. He wouldn't live. It was that simple.
As Byakuya thought this, he was interrupped by a frantic knocking on his door. He opened the door, only to find his grandmother, Setsuna staring at him with glassy grey eyes and her plump face was damp with tears. Her nose and cheeks were bright red and every part of her uttered sadness, misery and defeat. She could say nothing though, she just stared at him as if to apologize or offer news or words of comfort. Byakuya, feeling sick, took her into his arms and held her while she emitted harsh loud sobs. He felt her tears seep through his haori and tried to swallow the tears that were threatening to spill. He needed to keep outside composure while his insides were churning and breaking and thumping. He could not break. Warriors never broke.
Later, Byakuya walked slowly into the room in which Hisana had given birth. She was asleep when he saw her. Her face was still pale, and she was as limp and unmoving as death. Byakuya sat next to her sleeping form and brushed some lose strand of hair from her face. It was then that he forgot what a light sleeper she was, and he watched Hisana'a eyes open slowly. She blinked a few times then glanced up at him and let out a small smile. Tears were already falling down her face, but she must not have noticed. "Byakuya."
He forced himself to look away, for if her looked at her he would break. Instead her held her hand, which was cold and hard for a while. "Hisana, can you tell me what happened?" Hisana's smile faded and she turned away from him. "I fell. I was out, looking for Rukia and I was tired when I returned home. Then I fell. That's all I remember." She looked back at him. "Byakuya, look at me." Byakuya turned his head slowly and the wave of nausea hit him along with a deep pain in his chest and throat. "I'm sorry, Byakuya." He broke then. The levees keeping any emotion from falling broke and he buried his head in her chest. He didn't cry but he didn't keep composure either. "It's not your fault. Not your fault."
A few weeks later, Hisana was on her feet despite her doctor's orders to stay in bed unless she had to move to get food or the like. She didn't immediately go out to look for Rukia, but she did a few chores around her home. She had morning tea with Lady Setsuna and afternoon tea with the other noble Ladies. She also made sure all of the housework was attended to and that the meals were schedualed properly. All in all it was like a normal day. Hisana found that if she didn't talk or think about the horrible heartrending year she's had, all would be well.
Hisana hadn't spoken to Byakuya in a few days. He was always busy and she didn't want to disrupt when he rested. Despite being with him for four years, Hisana had never seen Byakuya shed one tear. Even when she lost the child, he didn't cry. He sobbed a lot out of fury but never cried. Perhaps he was incapable of showing such emotion. Hisana wouldn't put it past him.
When she grew tired of working, she retired to her room to take a nap. Hisana thought that maybe she was taking her past year too lightly. All of her miseries were clearly the Gods passing judgement on her. She was no different than her mother. She was an abandoning person and she felt as if she deserved anything that they gave to her, but Byakuya didn't have to suffer for her failings. It wasn't fair and it never would be.
As Hisana entered her room, that painful yet familiar feeling shot through her chest. It was as if a demon's hand was squeezing the air out of one of her lungs and another demon was stabbing the other lung. The pain drew her to her knees and she gripped her pink kimono in pain. She knew what was coing next; and she coughed roughly. Blood fell onto the floor as Hisana covered her mouth with her other hand. The pain was blinding. she struggled to fight back tears and coughed repeatedly. Blood covered her pretty kimono and the floor. Even when the coughing stopped, the squeezing and stabbing in her chest didn't. As the pain reached its peak, as it always did Hisana let out a loud sorrowful scream and fell to the floor.
She had found that the part when her pain came at its highest was strangely riveting. It was like the feeling of ecstasy in lovemaking. It brought pain and yet the happiness that it was almost over. She always saw white behind her eyelids. the difference was that everytime this happened, she was all alone. as she thought this, fear entered her body. The manor was strangely quiet and deserted. None of her maids were close by at the moment and neither was Lady Setsuna. And Byakuya... Another rack of pain hit her as she thought of how far far away he was at this moment of terror. This moment when at last she was able to admit that she was so very afraid. When the pain finally receded, Hisana closed her eyes in defeat and the storm of tears eventually put her to sleep.
That was how Byakuya found her when he returned home that day. His day was irritating since many of his comrads couldn't seem to get along and were misinterpreting battle symbols. He came home in a bad mood which his grandfather made much worse. "It would be wise of you to look into finding a new bride, Byakuya..." And so on. Byakuya dismissed him coldly and proceded to his room. He was ambushed by annoying flirtatious Ladies and their batting eyelashes. He simply ignored them. He wanted to be alone with Hisana and prehaps feel some kind of peace. But his night would cause him more pain and chaos.
When Byakuya was able to grasp the situation, he knelt down o Hisana and checked that she was breathing. It seemed that she was only asleep, but Byakuya decided to be cautious. He placed her in their bed gently and went to find a doctor. He almost cursed himself for not being at home to care for her. Then he realized that his being around her wouldn't keep her from being ill. On his way to find a doctor, byakuya ren into one of the Elders, his uncle Shiro.
"Byakuya, we must talk." Byakuya, forgeting abour noble protocal, rudely but gently oushed the old man aside. "Later," he said over his shoulder. Shiro grabbed Byakuya and forced him to turn around. "Byakuya, please there is something I must say to you." Byakuya faced him suspiciously. "Byakuya, I feel like I will not be alive much longer and I just want for you to forgive me." The old man dropped on his knees and kissed Byakuya's robes. "I'm sorry." Byakuya helped the man to his feet. "What have you done to me?" Shiro never gave him a response.
The old man went to bed that night and prayed for Hisana'a health and cursed himself for all he had done to that woman and Byakuya. He died that night. A man forgiven; a man saved.