Part three:

Penelope leaned against the sink, her knuckles white with the effort of hanging onto the vanity. Her breathing slowly settled after being violently ill as she looked in the mirror and shuddered. She had to pull herself together – Dave would be ashamed of her if he were there. But, really, he wouldn't have… he would've been the one holding her hair and rubbing her back, like he always had.

She took a deep, shuddering breath and rinsed her mouth out. "Well, he's not coming to rescue you this time, Princess, so you better pull up those big girl panties of yours," she said to her reflection caustically, "and grow up."

The bathroom door opened and JJ stepped in. "Hey," she said quietly. "You okay?"

"Define okay," Penelope replied. "I'm alive, which seems to be a victory in and of itself, doesn't it? But am I okay? I don't know." She groaned, then sighed. "I got sick."

"I know," JJ said simply. "But you're not sick now – and I know how hard it is to open up to people right now. Believe me, I know. You need to, though; you have to. You can't let yourself sink, Garcie."

"Who's out there?" Penelope asked.

"The old team," JJ said. "Chrissy went outside to smoke, but she'll be back. I saw Derek Morgan and his kids come in –"

Penelope stopped in her tracks and said, "I suppose Hotch told him."

"Of course," JJ said.

"I hope he doesn't turn this into amateur theatrical hour," Penelope sighed, drying her face with a scratchy paper towel.

"He looks good," JJ said.

"Oh, fuck off," Penelope muttered, reapplying her lipstick and turning on her heel. "On to the profilers, then."

When they left the bathroom, Christina was waiting for them. "Hey, Mama," she said softly, opening her arms to hug her mother. "I'm sorry I've been snarky. Must be all the death and the whole accidentally meeting Jack again thing," she sighed, frowning. "It all hurts more than I thought it would."

Penelope kissed her daughter's cheek. "God, ain't that the truth, sugar pop?" she murmured. "I keep waiting to wake up and have your Dad tell me it's all my fault for eating Cheez-Its in bed at night."

Christina giggled. "You still eat Cheez-Its in bed?" she asked.

Penelope grinned at her. "Sometimes, I get frisky and break out a bag of Doritos and a can of squeeze cheese," she admitted. "But usually only when Dad goes hunting."

Christina's smile vanished completely. "Mama –"

Penelope bit her lip and nodded. "I know."

"I'm sorry –"

"Not your fault," Penelope said firmly, squeezing her daughter's hand. "He loved you and your brother so much. You know that, right? You guys were his everything."

"Like hell we were," Christina scoffed, pushing her bangs back out of her eyes. "His sun rose and set with you, Mama. I want that kind of love –"

"You'll get it," her mother assured her. "And when you find it, neither heaven nor earth will keep you from him… or her."

Christina rolled her eyes. "Mama."

"I mean it – you shouldn't discount the gift because of the package it comes in," Penelope said softly. "Besides… your father and I weren't a perfect couple. Far from it, in fact." She looped her daughter's arm around hers and they walked down the corridor slowly. "But we were happy."

They walked into the foyer and Penelope smiled sadly at Christina, then looked at the crowd. "And look at all the people whose lives he touched," she whispered. "Just look."

For the first time, Christina really understood.

"Chrissy –"

Christina turned around and her smile vanished, replaced with a frown. "Jack," she said.

"I'm sorry about your dad," Jack Hotchner said. "He was a good guy."

"Me too," she agreed. "Sorry – about my dad, I mean." Damn it, why did she suddenly feel like she was eighteen and stupidly head over heels again? She couldn't even form a coherent thought. Almost two years had passed and she still had zero perspective. "Mama's just barely holding it together. I don't know what to do to help her."

"What about you?" he asked. For a moment, it seemed like old times – they were best friends again, holding hands and whispering secrets…

"I'm fine," she said, extracting her hand from his. "I hear you have a girlfriend. I hope you guys are happy together." With that, she took a deep breath, turned on her heel and walked away.

He could only have power over her if she let him – and she wasn't in the mood to let him have anything but a nice view of her ass as she strolled as far away from him as she could.

"I don't see why we had to come," Wanda whined. "I had a date tonight –"

Derek glared at her, and she shut her mouth in a hurry. "I thought we had this discussion about dating college boys before," he growled. "Not happening when you live under my roof."

"I had a test in Honors' English," Mick sighed, "and now I'll miss it and my GPA's going to go down and it's your fault because you dragged me to Virginia to go to some guy's funeral – and you didn't even like the dude."

"Enough," Derek snapped, his voice low and tight. "All I've heard since I told you two brats to pack your bags is how much I'm ruining your lives by taking you on this trip. Shut up and pay your respects. Rossi may have been a son of a bitch and a hell of a piece of work, but he saved a lot of people's lives." He glanced over at Wanda. "Including yours, young lady. So you will haul your ass over there and say something nice to Mrs. Rossi, or I will stop paying your fabric bills. Don't try me, Wanda Marie."

Wanda heard the threat in her father's voice and cocked her head for a moment, looking at him. "You didn't tell me that he saved my life," she said.

Derek swallowed hard and nodded. "When your mom took you guys out with her the night she died," he said quietly. "Rossi and Hotch pulled you guys out of the car." His voice cracked and he stopped speaking, remembering that night – for an ex-profiler, he'd done a shitty job of profiling his late wife. She'd been running drugs for one of the heaviest high-profile rings in Chicago at the time and she'd taken their kids out with her the whole time she was running. It still made him sick to think about her singing nursery rhymes and silly songs to the kids in the back of the car while the doors were packed with crack. A high speed FBI chase later, she was dead and his kids were in the hospital for a couple of weeks – but he thanked god every day that Rossi and Hotch had gotten to them in time. Even if they were shithead brats… besides, that was Derek's own fault.

Wanda's haughty mask slipped a little. "You never said," she accused.

"Because Rossi's a bastard," Derek sighed. "But… I owe him this much. And so do you two." He nudged them forward, toward the line of people to see Rossi's corpse. He watched them for a long time before he realized someone was watching him. "JJ, I'm not in the mood," he grunted.

JJ came over and gave him a hug. "It's been a while," she acknowledged. "You guys should come down for Christmas – just to get away from Chicago."

"That would involve taking time off from work, which I shouldn't have done for this," Derek sighed. "I'm working my ass off and can barely make ends meet, as is."

"You need a better job," JJ replied, nudging him. "Aren't you going to hug me back, Grumpy?"

He sighed and hugged her. "I bet you got here before the rest of us and you've been trying to comfort the widow," he commented passively.

"Absolutely," JJ replied. "You expected anything else?"

Derek shook his head and sighed. "I just told them," he said, gesturing to his kids. "About what happened the night their mom died."

JJ's eyes clouded with tears. "Oh, Derek –"

"It's been so long and I never told them that Rossi and Hotch pulled them out of that fucking car," he whispered. It was hard to make the words come out. "I didn't want them to blame her, JJ – even though it was her fault. I don't blame her anymore… I'm just glad the kids were okay even if she wasn't." He ran his hands through his short hair. "I can't go in there right now."

JJ hugged him again and sighed. "Then don't," she murmured. "Take your time. It's okay."

"He was a bastard," Derek said, "a fucking son of a bitch –"

"Yeah, he was," she agreed, "but he didn't even hesitate to save your daughter from that car, Morgan. You have to remember that much."

"I do," he sighed. "That's why I can't go in there. I can't let them see me cry." He turned on his heel and pulled out of JJ's embrace before he walked away.

"Mrs. Rossi?"

Penelope turned at the sound of the voice – young, so young. "Yes?" she asked, excusing herself from her conversation with one of Dave's old military buddies.

The girl looked nervous. "I'm Wanda Morgan," she said quietly, "and this is my brother, Michael."

Penelope studied her for a moment, and felt her heart breaking all over again. "It's good to meet you," she said, extending her hand to each teenager in turn. "I'm glad you were able to come."

"Dad said Mr. Rossi saved my life," Wanda said.

Penelope swallowed hard. "Yes," she said very quietly. "Did your father tell you that Dave got hurt crawling into the car to get you? He would've laid down heaven and earth to get you out of that car – because he knew your mother was gone and Derek couldn't lose you kids, too." She pulled her hand away and quickly wiped away her tears. "How are you two?" she asked. "I haven't heard anything about you – come tell me everything," she insisted.

"I'm going to be a designer," Wanda said. "I've already started making clothes for my friends – Dad hates it when I go on buying binges."

"I want to write," Mick spoke up hesitantly.

Penelope wondered why he was so quiet, but Wanda said, "Don't mind him – just make sure he can see your lips when you're talking."

Mick smiled crookedly, that very Derek Morgan smile, and said, "I can only hear in my left ear. You're on my right side – I can't hear what you're saying, Mrs. Rossi. It's okay – don't get upset. I can read lips and speak sign language."

"Oh," Penelope said. "No one told me –"

He shrugged. "Been like this as long as I can remember," Mick replied with a laugh. "I'm used to it now. And Dad doesn't cut me any slack, so…"

"Of course he doesn't," Penelope said. "And I'm sure he doesn't cut anyone any slack."

"You're not like he said you are," Wanda said after a moment of silence. "He said you're cold and mean. You're not."

Penelope smiled sadly. "I'll tell you guys a secret," she said softly, "but you have to promise not to tell your father."

"Okay," Mick agreed immediately.

Wanda hesitated, then nodded. "Okay."

Penelope leaned in closer to them and said, "Your dad is one of the best men I've ever known, and even if he doesn't love me anymore… I still love him." She kissed both of them on the cheek and said, "Why don't you guys go get something to eat? There are sandwiches downstairs."

She watched them leave, thinking that, in another lifetime, they could have been hers.