Thought I was going for a creepy chapter 8 but it didn't go that way. It will, though. I love the inanimate objects.

This couldn't be Zera; the fennec fox is rubbing on my leg and pining for my attention. Zera is strong and independent and hasn't shown any signs of needing affection. I really hope this isn't her, but there are too many red flags: the similar clothes on the floor, the silver around her lips, and even cuts on the skin.

She's pathetically cute, pawing onto me and wanting me to hold her in my arms. I can't resist a loving animal.

As I hold her close to my face, she nuzzles into my neck and flicks her stubbly tail. I don't get a chance to hug others this intimately so it's a pleasant feeling. Her fur is a little coarse and unkempt, but if this is what she desires from me, I will gladly give it to her. I'm not the most affectionate of my brothers, but Sensei has taught us to show compassion in times of need. But I'm embarrassed to say that I don't exercise that lesson very often. I've given April and Mikey hugs, mostly; the biggest complaint from them is that I give stiff embraces.

I'm a soldier, not an admirer.

I give her a gentle pat on her tiny head and peck it with my lips. Klunk never lets me get this close, not since he was a kitten.

"It's Underlight outside, Zera," my voice is quiet and concerned, "and I should find Dr. Buck. I don't know how to turn you back."

She nuzzles me more; I hold her closer. "You made it sound like I shouldn't go outside after the light dies. I have to, though. I have to get home."

No movement or sound.

"I want to go home."

I notice she's getting some of the silver liquid from her muzzle onto my neck; it tingles and then feels like it's crawling in a small circle on my skin. Very unnerving. I turn back to the bathroom, shuffle inside, and use the once-pink-now-brown towel to wipe the liquid off us. Just when I had cleaned myself off, too. Typical.

Zera fights my attempt, and I'm clicking my tongue like Sensei used to do to us (correction: still does), and she adamantly struggles. I eventually conclude that a little glob on her won't hurt, and I don't want to risk getting bitten and having to put her down on the floor. When our Bathroom Battle ends, I poke around the den for a small satchel to place her clothes and various other protective objects. Good thing I still have the dagger on me. Maybe I can investigate the previous rooms before moving onwards?

The entrance back to the front door is completely sealed by what appears to be a wide dungeon door. I guess that answers my question.

Impatient Zera leaps out of my arms and runs to a grandfather clock. She taps it with her paw and squeaks at me.

"Something behind there?" I stare at her.

Her tipping ears and frustrated bounce perform a resounding yes. The clock is bulky and heavy, but it scraps across the floor easily enough. There's a gateway behind it, faintly lighted but my eyes can detect a few objects: a set of iron fire-tools, an old-style pink diamond-studded telephone box, a small dream-catcher, a croquet mallet, a fancy silver satchel, and a pointy multi-colored object. Zera feels the need to sniff at the pointy object and that prompts me to pick it up.

"It's a lantern, Zera." I turn it over and fully inspect it. "Shaped like the Moroccan star. Have you ever seen that?"

She chews on the dream-catcher and tries to drag it out of the closet.

I stop and help her. "Wait, wait. Don't tear it up. Stop, please."

Hiss, hiss bleeps from her little throat, and while I like to avoid her sharp teeth, I carefully lift the catcher because I want to keep it intact. I bap her on the head and shake my finger at her. "Zera, I need everything I can get my hands on. Please don't tear anything up or you're going in the bag."

I think she just huffs and sits outside the closet. I'm glad we communicate well.

As soon as the items are taken from the closet, a thin clawed hand shoves me out of it and the clock slams back against the wall. I trip over Zera and my treasures scatter all on the floor. Caught me off guard!

"Are you okay, Zera?"

She nibbles her butt and scratches her ear. Blankly stares at me after that.

I get to my feet, a little embarrassed. "Yeah. Good to know."

I can barely see in the room now. Moonlight, or something like moonlight, is filtering through the window and casting odd shadows in the room. At first, they're just wiggling in one spot, but suddenly it's a full night club scene on the walls. It's distracting and really obscene. I do my very best to ignore them and claim back my objects. I find the tools, satchel, and lantern. Zera's squeaks indicate she's crawling under the sofa... and stuck. I just see a little tail furiously flicking and legs wobbling.

"Zera, hang on. I'll help you." I lift the sofa, and she delicately retrieves the dream-catcher, probably remembering my instructions from earlier. "Good girl." I pet her head and place the dream-catcher in the satchel.

"There's one more, but I can't remember what it was. Do you remember, Zera?"

One tiny squeak and a clueless look from her fuzzy face.

"Brring, brring!"

Is that a telephone?

"BRRING, BRRING!"

It sounds like a person imitating a telephone, actually. Agitated, too.

"I'm RINGING! PICK ME UP!"

I look down at Zera. "That voice sounds AWFULLY familiar to me. I'm getting a sinking feeling here."

"Follow the sound of my ring. BRRRING! BR-Ring!"

Zera and I hunt around the room for the hidden voice, and soon I have a sneaking suspicion it's coming from the bathroom. I turn on the light, although I don't remember turning it off, and there's nobody in the room.

"Look down, Einstein," whoever dryly advised. I'm almost tempted to forget the search and rescue and move along; I have plenty of things I could be doing than listening to sarcasm.

Zera zooms between my legs and sniffs at something on the floor. The pink old-style telephone in all of its tackiness, feminine glory seems to be our victim.

"Hey, Cutie. That tickles!" the PHONE says to Zera's manic scrutiny; she taps it and jerks it back like a kitten playing with ice. "I'm going to eat that paw and then tickle your belly!" Followed by crazy laughter.

"Mikey?" I say it so quickly that I don't have time to put the words back in my own mouth. Why did I say that? It's an inanimate object, not my fully grown turtle brother.

"That sounds like a nice name. I'll take it! I've never had a name before."

Zera backs up to my feet and almost leaps out of her fur. I bend down to the floor and set "Mikey" the rosy telephone on its stand. "I apologize. You act very much like my brother Mikey."

"What about us?"

"Mikey? What kind of name is that? Sounds like an itch."

"I hope I get a cooler name."

"Put me back in the closet. I feel some weird shit here."

"Most intriguing. I'll have to consult the Orphic Vampire Squid about this matter."

Every object from the closet is speaking to me. I bring the mallet closer to my face and twirl it around a good bit. This is straight out of a kids' movie: talking inanimate objects. They don't have facial expressions or anything; they just talk in my head, I gather.

"Zera, can you hear these voices, too?"

She's not at my feet anymore and is sitting at the bathroom entrance, like a loyal pet. I nod to her, prompting her to answer me in some form or fashion.

Confusingly cocks her head at me. Naturally.

"Dude, I don't think she can," the mallet snaps. "What's my name? Come on, Froggy. I'm itching to bust someone's skull in two!"

Definitely a Raphael until the mallet said, "Are you a frog or a lizard? I can never tell the two apart."

"Hello, Casey Jones." I nod to the mallet.

Next, the two fire-tools. I need to put one back because I already have a load to carry and no extra set of hands anymore. "Hello, Fire-Tool. How are you?"

"Excellent today, thank you. I'm very happy you rescued us from that boring closet. I need some adventure and stimulation."

"Donatello. Definitely." I smile at it and join it with Casey the croquet mallet. "Zera, who is next?"

"Don't ask that mangy animal. Just get on with it!" a bark came from the satchel. Now, that sounds like a Raphael. I pull out the Moroccan star-shaped lantern. "Admire me later. Let's bust this joint. I was going stir-crazy in there!"

"Raphael, my guiding light. I might be in trouble," I tease and bend to get the phone off the floor.

"What does that mean? Raphael? Isn't that an angel's name? Do I look like I have wings and a halo to you?"

Mikey the phone quipped, "Someone needs their morning coffee!"

I promise you that I did NOT clink the lantern against the phone. Did it on its own! The phone went quiet after the little tussle.

"I'm a vintage purse, you know! Better than all of these manly chumps. Surely you wouldn't forget to greet a lady."

I pat the pretty satchel. "I would never forget the loveliest woman I've ever met, April. Not a wrinkle or ugly fold in sight."

Zera squeaks and is running around in a circle. I'm sure there's one more object I'm forgetting.

And it speaks up. "I'm sure you have a metaphoric name for this old dream-weaver here, like the wind speaking to the forest or the ocean's whisper."

I smile and retrieve it from the satchel. "Probably not that cool, but you have the name of the most influential person to me. Splinter. Master Splinter." I bend back down to the whirling Zera and ask her to stop for a moment. "I have a feeling that I need you to protect my friend here, Splinter. She is important to me as any of you are. I'm a foreigner to this world and need all the help I can get."

There's a tiny, silky string woven into the object and I use it to tie the dream catcher around Zera's neck. It's a little bigger than she is so it has to drap over her back but it works. "Keep it on, Zera. Very important that it stays on you."

Splinter the dream-catcher replies, "She will be safe under my guard. Thank you for this opportunity." Zera responds by nibbling and scratching at it.

Now that I have my fuzzy and inanimate troops gathered, I can go forward in this journey and find a way to break this maze.