Chapter Twelve
"Dude, it's strange to know Logan's gone, ya know?" Bobby Drake mused aloud. "I mean, just like that. It's crazy."
In the seat directly situated across from Bobby, Warren Worthington nodded his agreement. "It already feels strange. To think that he's gone, I mean." The man affectionately codenamed Angel ran his hand through his short golden locks. "It's a shame."
Scott listened silently on. He, Warren, and Bobby, were the first members among the team waiting in the War Room for a decidedly early debriefing with the rest of the X-Men—called, of course, by the Professor. The hot topic of today's meeting? Unsurprisingly, Logan's expected/not-so-expected departure.
"Did you see, Ororo?" Bobby whistled. "Man, that was crazy. I've never seen Ororo like that before."
Scott finally decided to chime in. "I've known Ororo since she first joined the X-Men, and I haven't either – not apart from her Claustrophobia," he explained gravely.
It was true that Scott Summers normally wasn't the type of man to discuss another teammate's personal life amongst other members like a trio of chattering schoolgirls, but in this occasion, he wanted his opinion on the Wolverine out there, just for the record. There'd be no question as to where Scott stood or how he felt about Wolverine when the dust settled, as far as he was concerned.
"I'm not surprised Logan left," he said. "I'm not saddened by it either."
"Scott," Warren began to object, but Scott shook his head at him.
"No, it's true. All he does is cause problems. He has ever since he first showed up on our doorstep." Scott frowned then. "Ororo's better off without him, and so are we," he finished. Clipped. Resolute. Firm.
Warren and Bobby sat in silence and exchanged wary looks with each other. The hard note that had found its way into their leader's voice spoke volumes, more than anything he could or would naturally reveal. Scott was stoic that way.
Scott and Logan were not friends, had never been, and likely never would be. Though it had to be said that was more Logan's fault than Scott's. All because Logan had flirted and pursued Scott's fiancée right under the man's own nose. Not to mention how Logan had undermined Scott practically during his entire career as an X-Man, being the hard-ass that he was. Not only in his pursuit of Jean, but with his blatant disregard for Scott's authority. And now, more recently, he had struck again with his blatant disregard for Ororo – one of Scott's teammates, his fellow co-leader, and also – more importantly than that – one of his dearest friends.
Logan was a cad, and obviously no good – for anyone.
"Rogue's pretty upset too," Bobby mentioned. "I mean, he was the reason she first came here. I think she kinda hero-worshiped him." His head quirked curiously to the side. "It was actually so bad that when we were dating I even thought she kinda liked him." He and Warren chuckled at little.
"I think she's got eyes for the Cajun now," Bobby piped, and their laughter grew, or rather their snickering.
After a sobering minute or two, Bobby added as an afterthought, "I know she's hurt he's gone. He left her a note saying goodbye and that he'd be back but," Bobby Drake shook his head, "I don't think it did much good."
The door opened suddenly then, and the three of them turned to look as the very object and topic of their discussion walked in.
It was easy to see Rogue had been crying from the telling red eyes she was currently sporting. She offered a weak greeting to each of them and solemnly took a seat two down from Bobby. Her former boyfriend offered her an encouraging smile and leaned over and patted her hand.
Next to enter was Kitty, and then Jean, naturally taking the seat beside her fiancé. The occupants greeted each other softly, the entire mood of the room unusually rather somber. Scott leaned over to whisper to his fiancée. "Have you, uh, spoken with Ororo since . . . ?"
"Hardly," Jean responded. "But I know Ororo; she'll be down. She won't let this affect X-Business. She'll pretend she's fine and all together, instead of letting someone be her shoulder," Jean surmised sadly. "I volunteered to substitute a few of her classes for a couple days and she outright refused."
Scott sighed, once more silently damning the Wolverine for yet another mess he had created.
Professor Xavier joined them minutes later wearing a mild expression on his face. He appeared normal, dressed impeccably in one of his ever-present tailored made suits, but the normally present good-natured gleam in his eye was missing as he addressed them.
"Afternoon, my X-Men."
The older man wheeled to the front of the room, taking his place at the head of the round table with the rest of them sitting around him like King Arthur and his knights. They returned the Professor's greeting with various acknowledgements and salutations. Xavier's eyes went around the table. Instinctively knowing who it was the Professor was searching out, Jean chirped up. "Ororo will be down soon, Professor, I'm sure."
"Of course, I don't doubt that," Charles assured, knowing Ororo's tenacity as well, if not better than most. "Is Gambit coming?"
x x x
Gambit took his time ambling down the hallways en route to the War Room – conflicted greatly by his dilemma with Ororo. What was going to happen between him and his Stormy, Gambit wondered. What was going to happen? It had been several days since their candid 'moment' in his room and he still had no clear answer.
He wanted one.
Gambit hadn't spoken to Ororo since the night Wolverine left. After the drama in the foyer, he'd carried up to her bedroom and stroked her gently as she lay crying, her head on his lap. He listened like a dutiful best friend, and possibly something more, as she sobbed out what had taken place between her and Logan right before he'd left.
Something struck him so poignantly at the moment while he sat listening to her sniffling in his lap. This wasn't the first in his life he had found himself consoling Ororo in the midst of a hard time. When she had still been trapped in that twelve-year-old body, she used to wake up occasionally from terrible nightmares about the Shadow King, and if it wasn't the memories of the Shadow King that frightened her it was ones about her parents.
But this was the first time, he realized, that he didn't want to comfort her merely as a friend. That's the position he usually played in these scenarios, but it wasn't adequate enough for him this time.
The revelation was like a ray of light piercing through the dark. He froze completely, his hand in her hair. His heart raced. Ororo felt the change in body language and turned to look up at him. She began to sit up.
Ororo stared at him, running a hand down tear-stained cheeks. "What's wrong, Remy?"
Remy didn't speak. He heard the question, but didn't begin to know how to answer it. Or even if this was time the time to bring it up – what it was that was happening between them.
Remy turned to her and slowly began shaking his head. He waved it off. "Don' worry, chère. I don' t'ink now's de time."
Ororo frowned and rubbed at her tired eyes. "The time for what?"
Remy hesitated. "I don' t'ink I can be a good friend right now, 'Roro," he said, head down.
"Why do you say that?" she pried.
He shook his head again. "Stormy, I wanna be here fo' y', girl. I wanna say all de comfortin' t'ing's dat y' need t' hear 'bout de Wolverine, an' all that, but . . . I can't because I wouldn' mean it. Yo' kno' I ain' de type t' say somet'ing dat I don' feel, chère."
"What do you feel?" Ororo asked after several seconds' silence.
"Dat de couillon should've neva had de chance t' be wit' y' in de first place, 'cos I shoulda been dere . . ." he answered honestly. "Dat I ain't fo' a minute sorry he's gone, even t'ough I kno' y' upset about it." He sighed and trained his gaze back on Ororo. "I can't comfort y' like a best friend should right now because dat's not de way I feel 'bout you. Yo' mo' den dat . . . Dat's not where we are anymore."
"Then this is about the other day," Ororo ventured slowly, "when we were in your room the day of the mission?"
"Yes an' no. Dis goes back even further than that, girl. Dat day y' said dat y' loved me, but never told me if y' still do."
Ororo jumped up. Suddenly anxious and hasty. "You're right, Remy. Now is not a good time. I think I'm ready for bed."
She heard him kiss his teeth. "Why do y' keep tryin' t' ignore de situation, 'Roro?" Gambit followed her, simultaneously annoyed and encouraged by her dodge. Annoyed because he wanted a proper answer, and encouraged because for some reason she wasn't being straight with him. If she didn't love him anymore, and she loved the Wolverine then she could come right out and say it, couldn't she? Ororo had always been a direct woman. Why was this suddenly the exception?
"I'm not in the mood discuss this right now, I'm sorry. And I think that fact alone should, at least, partially answer your question."
Gambit scowled at Ororo's back. "Yeah? How's dat, chère?"
Ororo bowed her head, eyes closing on a soft exhale. "Because he's gone. I love Logan and he's gone – he left."
Gambit's heart sank at the quiet admission, and his disappointment grew even further with her next words to him. "I wasn't lying that afternoon in your room when I told you that I loved Logan. I do." A tiny tear fell from Ororo's eye and she wiped at her with her fingertips. "I just – I do not wish to talk about it—"
Gambit stared at her several seconds before pressing his lips together and nodding in disheartened resignation. "Non, non, I get it, chère." He held his hands up. "Y' ain' in de mood t' talk." Gambit studied her a few more silent seconds and then turned and headed for the door. "Good night," he muttered in a rush, and then was gone.
Now alone in her room, Ororo closed her eyes and silently berated herself—about both Logan and Remy. Logan would come back to her, Ororo was sure of it. She consoled herself with those thoughts. Even as she felt into a restless sleep.
The Professor greeted him as he came through the door. "We were just wondering about you. Glad you made it."
Gambit nodded. Weren't these meetings mandatory? It wasn't as if he had choice, now did he?
Gambit wasn't surprised to see everyone in their seats and waiting as he found an empty chair. He took a glance around. His Stormy wasn't there yet. He should've gone up to check on her.
Bobby idly tapped his pen against the table, and Kitty rolled her eyes in annoyance. The rest of them seemed lost in their own thoughts at the moment.
At it were, Ororo was the last to enter the War Room, and like Rogue, she didn't look so good. Even so, the woman was helplessly gorgeous; there was no getting around that fact.
She crossed the room, standing tall, back straight, avoiding the stares that even now she could feel tracking her as she wordlessly took the chair next to Jean. It was a seat just one over from Gambit who was regarding her with a slight frown. Not that she blamed him. She owed him—just what exactly she didn't know. Not completely.
The cool façade she was demonstrating didn't fool anyone. The breakdown a handful of them had witnessed in the foyer the afternoon Wolverine left belied the casualness she had hoped to pull off. She knew it as surely as the others, and her cheeks burned with the shame and embarrassment of it all.
Unable to avoid their stares any longer, Ororo mustered a tight, cursory grin and gentle incline of her head towards her fellow teammates and quietly apologized for making them wait.
"You're fine, Ororo," said the Professor. "It's not a problem."
Inwardly, Ororo winced. The last thing she wanted was for them to accommodate her, and look upon her with pity. Ororo nodded and was glad when Charles began speaking and the eyes that formerly had been plastered on her slowly refocused to the front.
Professor Charles Xavier spoke to a rapt audience. There wasn't a soul present that was not curious about Wolverine's sudden abandonment of the team (and Ororo for that matter). Clear interest shone in the eyes of his X-Men as he briefed them on the events of the mission to the Friend of Humanity headquarters over a week ago. Since several of the members had not been involved in the mission, this was their first time in hearing a detailed account of it, and what had taken place there. The mission that was supposed to be simple. All the Professor retold, Gambit, Storm, and Kathryn were already aware of since they had been there, first account. Even their curiosity and attention peaked, however, when Charles began to discuss how this all pertained to the Wolverine.
"The file Logan had found was simply labeled Department K," the Professor explained. "He brought the file to me and together we explored its contents. Needless to say, the information we discovered in it was troubling."
"What did it say, Professor?" Scott asked.
Ororo listened intently.
"The anonymous group that was buying the kidnapped mutants from the F.o.H. was the Canadian government group we just spoke of – 'Department K'."
Canada. That certainly was a bit of news. The pieces were slowly beginning to fit together. Xavier continued on. "Within this Department K is a program designated only as 'Weapon X'. The file didn't contain much detailed information, but we did get that it dealt in experimentation on mutants. The details were vague. After learning that, it was obvious to see why they had agreed to buy kidnapped mutants from the F.o.H. and what little Laura's fate would have been had we not intervened in time."
"But why the Friends of Humanity?" Rogue asked hesitantly.
"I wonder as well, Professor," Jean said. "They've never had any dealings with them before. They aren't even in the same country."
"With the practical decimation of the F.o.H.'s resources it's easy to understand why they would have contacted them to help retrieve mutants. The F.o.H. were desperate, and I'm sure jumped at the chance to not only kidnap the mutants they hate so vehemently, but to receive payment from some shadowy deep-pocketed government group."
"A two-for-one deal," Scott sneered in disgust.
"Precisely."
You could see the various looks of disgust on the faces of the occupants in the room, struggling to absorb the information—as revolting as it was.
"Obviously, this was a big break for Logan. A bit of a blessing and a curse. You all know I've worked with him since he first arrived here, working to help him rediscover his memories and past. You also know the efforts had not been particularly fruitful." Charles' voice sounded a bit regretful.
"Logan had been increasingly experiencing flashbacks over the last several weeks. Snatches of buried memory that would come to him at unpredictable times, possibly at a trigger of some sort. At the F.o.H. base, he experienced a violent one. Something about the circumstances prompted a very intense flashback for him. That compounded with the file he had found, and you can understand his reaction to poor Mr. Graydon Creed when he found him."
A surge of pity washed over Ororo and her eyes gathered moisture. She swallowed thickly and bowed her head. Her heart ached.
Gambit watched her with a scrutinizing eye.
"I interrogated Laura and scanned her mind. Her own memories held bits and pieces of conversation she had overhead from her kidnappers that confirm our theory."
"What theory?" Warren frowned.
"That this group was involved in what happened to Logan and his adamantinum skeleton. Government experimentation on mutants." There seemed to be a collective intake of breath. Ororo's throat felt tight.
"For days I probed Logan's mind, and this time the channels seemed clearer. As if a block had been removed, onset by the episode he had at the base. One thing showed up consistently—a military base in the Canadian Rockies called Alkali Lake."
"So that's where he's gone," Ororo said, the words hardly audible—murmured more to herself than them. Heads turned to stare at her, eyes shone out holding muted sympathy.
Charles nodded apologetically. "Yes, it is."
Gambit watched her the whole time. Noting her reactions. He saw her wipe discreetly at her eyes and knew she trying to rid herself of unwanted tears.
The Professor went on. Explaining to them how he had discouraged Logan from leaving and all that, but Ororo barely heard any of it. All she could concentrate on was Logan—his situation, where he was headed. It was difficult to process.
He said he would come back to her. He promised. She had to keep reminding herself of that.
She heard different ones ask various question about the subject and enquiring about Laura and her plight, but it was white noise to her. Even when the Professor finished, dismissed them all and they began shuffling out of the room whispering amongst themselves, Ororo paid no mind. Just sat there, staring down at the table. Jean made her way over to her, laid a hand on her shoulder and asked if she was alright. Ororo told her she was, and Jean simply sighed. Offered her an ear and shoulder, if and when she felt up to it. The redhead cast a wistful glance back at her friend before leaving.
Gambit stood but didn't leave immediately. He considered attempting to speak with Ororo, but honestly she didn't look up to it. He should have whipped Wolverine's ass that day he confronted him in the locker room, and he almost wanted the Wolverine to show himself at the mansion again some day so soon so that he could correct this mistake.
He was the pondering the notion when Scott called his name. Gambit turned to him and saw Scott standing outside the door, gesturing with his head towards the hall. "Can I have a moment?"
Gambit took one last glance back at Storm and nodded, reluctant to leave. As if sensing this, Scott said, "I'll only be a minute."
"D'accord."
Scott closed the door to the War Room and faced Gambit. "I'll cut right to the chase, LeBeau."
One of Gambit's eyebrows lifted curiously. "Wha' is it?"
Scott blew air through his nose, and nodded back at the closed War Room door. "That woman in there, she loves you."
To the chase, indeed. Both of Gambit's brows lifted this time, even higher if that was possible. "Excuse me?"
"And you love her," Scott continued, ignoring Gambit's slight look of surprise.
"Where is dis comin' from, mon ami?"
"A conversation Ororo and I had a few weeks ago."
Gambit looked skeptical for second.
"Jean and I were going through a time, as you probably already know, and Ororo tried to help." Gambit did know. He had been the one to encourage Ororo to help her friends, and forgive Jean while she was at it.
"She came and talked to me one afternoon and was telling me to give Jean a chance to work it out. She told me that she had forgiven Jean and Logan and that I should try to as well." Gambit continued to listen.
"I asked her why she forgave Logan and she said to me it was because she loved him." Gambit frowned, his jaw hardening. Not something he wanted to hear stated again.
"But then I mentioned you—I asked her if she forgave you for leaving back then because she loved you too." Gambit's red/black eyes bore into Scott's shielded ones, imploring him to continue.
Scott smiled a little. "When I asked her Ororo got this nervous look on her face. She tried to hide, but I know Ororo. She said that yes that was why and that she's always loved you as friend." Scott smirked suddenly. "But I knew better. Ororo was devastated when you disappeared the first time. Trust me, Jean and I were there to witness it. When you returned it was like a bit of her had been revived. She won't admit to you just yet, because she won't admit it to herself, but Ororo has feelings for you – beyond friendship."
"Looks like she's hung up on the Wolverine right now," Gambit said bitterly.
"Oh, she loves Logan. I don't doubt that. But Ororo loves you, too. And she has for a long time. You just weren't around long enough to find out. Now you are. You should think about doing something about that," Scott advised.
He stared at him a second longer and left Gambit standing in the hall in deep contemplation. Ororo had helped him, hopefully he would be able to help her. Remy LeBeau was no saint, but Scott knew he'd give his life for Ororo in a second. When she had been lost, and the X-Men couldn't find her, it'd been the Cajun who had taken care of her, shielded her, protected her. And while it was true that he had hurt her by leaving, Scott suspected there was more to his departure than was commonly thought. Unlike, Wolverine.
Scott Summers had no love for Logan. He could empathize with the man's plight, but to leave behind a team and a woman who cared for him was incredibly low in Scott's opinion. Logan was thickheaded, and he wondered if the man would ever learn. Ororo was the best thing that could ever happen to Logan, and he was sick of the bastard hurting his family and friends.
He had meant it when he'd told them earlier they were better off without him. He hoped Ororo would realize she was too.
He was confident in the Cajun's ability to help with that.
Author's Note: My thanks to those who've read and commented on the story :D
To Be Continued