hello everyone , firstl of all i do not mean to be difficult but it would be nice to get a reply once in a while i know some of you are reading judging by the activity but reviews are what keeps me going and now since the cbs board has tranfer to facebook , this place and belluvsmiai sites are the only place i can post , i do this for fun or pass the time but gettign reviews make my day i will be posting a bunch of chap to cathc to where i left off on the cbs board but im am unsure if i will continue due to the lack of reviews , ohh well what can you do you cant please everyone . :)
Waiting in lines at the chinese restaurant holding her son agaisnt her hips and rocking him back and forth to pass the times natalia smiled when her little boy laughed at her funny face .
When she heard the door behind her hitting the small door bell attach at the wall she didnt pay attention as the line moved a few step but it caught little joey attention .
JOEY: 'yan ,'yan
The little boy excited handed his arm at the man who just stepped inside the restaurant fussing in his mother arms which she had no choice but to let him down as Joey quickly ran toward Ryan ,who picked him up and tossed him in the air before catching him back .The little boy laughter put a smile onto Ryan face .
RYAN: hey buddy what you doing here .
JOEY: gene'al Tao the little boy answer over eagerly wrapping his arms around Ryan neck .
NAT: Hey Ryan she said with a smile ,ryan always had a way with her son and she always appreciated .
RYAN: Hey nat paying my little buddy here a night out .
NAT: Yeah he loves the general Tao here and been annoying me for 2 weeks to come back .
JOEY: Gen'al Tao...Gene'al Tao the little boy kept repeating clapping his hands together.
RYAN: Well buddy i must say you got great taste .
NAT: Your here alone she asked not really wanting to know if Jasmine was with him but she asked anyway to be polite ..
RYAN: yeah im here for take out jasmine had to go to London at the last minute ...again so im spending the weekend all by lonesome .
NAT: and let me guess you would have gone home eat in front of the tv and watch sportscenter .
RYAN : hey there nothing worng with good old sporstcenter .
NAT: Watching it alone on friday night is ...well..
RYAN: Pathetic he laughed .
NAT: You said it not me she laughed back ...i tell you what i know its not like watching sportscenter but after were done eating im taking Joey to the park your more then welcome to join us .
RYAN : what do you say little buddy want me to come with.
Little joey clapped his hand nodding his head.
RYAN Then i guess its a yes .
The line moved forward it was their turn to be seated ,sitting down at the table they put Joey between them on a booster and ordered Joey who had been asking for general tao for 2 straight weeks shyly remained quiet when the waiter asked him what he wanted .
When their plates arrived a short while after Ryan dugged right in enjoying his sauted beef a little too much .
NAT: Dont forget to breath Ryan she laughed along with Joey .
RYAN: I havent had meat in a whole month he said taking a big mouthfull of his beef .
NAT: Why ?
RYAN:Jasmine on this low carb diet and she said that me eatign meat in front of her wouldnt be very supportive of a boyfriend so she banned meat fromt the house.
NAT: Thats just silly she shouldnt make you pay for something she wants to do .
RYAN:all she makes me eat his vegetable and disgusting tofu , i dont know why she insist on beeing on a diet shes so skinny .
NAT: yeah some people no mather what they do they see themself bigger .
RYAN: it's like an obssesion with her everyday its ryan do you think im fat ryan this ryan that ,the other day i dared told her that she was too skinny that i didnt like to feel her ribs when we made..
Ryan stopped mid sentence when he notice Joey listening to him .
RYAN; You know ..when we ...you know ..
NAT: Right got you .
RYAN : i got such an earfull that night she made me sleep on the couch .
NAT: thats the first time i hear a girl making her boyfriend sleep on the couch because he thought she was too skinny .
Using her knife and fork to cut Joey pieces of chicken into tiny pieces so he coudl eat by himself ryan found himself staring at the 2 and how rigth now to the outside eye they look like a young family enjoying a night out .
Joey excitedly clap his hands together snapping ryan out of his little fantasy ,smilling at Joey he wiped the side of the little boy cheek when too excited about the famous general tao he spread the sauce all over his face .
Watching them interact she wished that joey had father to love and help him be a man ,Joey didnt really have a good role model ,sure he father was good role model he spend a lot of time with Joey but her aging father couldnt do things a normal father would do ,teach him how to throw a ball,or sports any thing a good father would do with his son or daughter .Joey was a good little boy who deserved a man presence in his life she was glad that Ryan ,even thought Joey wasnt his was in her son life .That had been the case ever since she 'd learned she was expecting Jesse cardoza the man who should be sitting in Ryan place right now told her he wanted nothing to do with the baby and that she should have an abortion but the thougth never crossed her mind and that was the last time she seen jesse Cardoza .In the 3 short years Joey had been in her life he never made an attemp to know his son ,sometimes it bothered her but when she saw Ryan with him she couldnt helped but wished that it had been ryan all along .
He almost was she thought ,looking at ryan making funny faces at joey her mind wandered to the night of Eric funeral .
The weeks before had been exhausting emotionnaly for everyone ,she still doesnt remenber how ryan what had possesed her to invit him after the funeral , she tought it might have been because she didnt want to be alone and knew that even if he didnt admit it himself he didnt want to be either.
(night after eric funeral )
Stepping into her house she didnt turned to him even thought he was right behind her ,they both knew why they were there ,they didnt need to say it they were consenting adult and just needed to feel some close to them after loosing one of their best friend .
Throwing her keys on the nearest table and taking her heels off ,carelessly dicarding she thought ryan was right behind her has she walk toward the kitchen but has she turned around to ask him if he wanted anything she found nothing but empty space ,popping her head in the hallway she saw ryan placing his shoes carefully side by side right next to hers who ryan had place in order on the small carpet on her entryway .She wasnt sure if she found his ocd cute or weird ,but it made her smile ,it was tiny but she smiled .
Looking up ryan shrugged a little bit ashamde that he been caught in one of his ocd tendencies but anytime he was highly emotional it would sneak up on him .
Walking with his head down toward her ,Natalia handed him a beer she'd taken from the fridge ,taking a sip they both leaned against the counter next to each other quietly sipping their beer.
Ryan put his beer down on the counter and looked down .Finishing her beer quicker then she wanted she droped it right next to Ryan's .Her finger touching his,both their finger twitched but neither moved ,his hand on top of hers , looking at the floor has if the pattern was the most interesting thing they ever seen .
Feelling his finger run back in forth on the back of her hand a small pant of guilt hit her she knew it was wrong to do this on the day of one of their closest friend funeral but she didnt want to sleep alone tonight and she knew Ryan would be discreet enough to never mentionned it again .He moved in front of her his finger slowly exploring the skin on her arm,his finger tickle her lightly but yet they avoided looking at each other instead they both follow the trail of his finger teasing up and down her bare arm reaching her shoulder he moved the strap of the black dress she was wearing to the side.
finnaly he looked up at her and was met by a pair of the saddest eye he ever seen and he knew his own eyes reflected the same ,her hands grip his suit so hard that Ryan was pulled toward her both his hand finding her bare shoulder he move the other strap down looking deep in her eyes .
When she learned foward to kiss him he leaned back unsure and immediatly regreted when he seen the look on her face his reaction could have been receive has rejection but thats was far from what he wanted .Slowly his finger teased her skin once more and he felt the goosebump formed on her skin he moved up to cup her cheeks with both hands .This time he leaned in and captured her lips slowly and hesitant at first their lips met over and over slowly teasing,but soon that was over fast and the need to be with each other took over .Cupping the back of her head Ryan deepenned the kiss pulling at his tie she brought his body flush agaisnt hers ,pouring gasoline on a already well lit fire they both moaned at the contact and when she discarded his jacket ryan took his hands off a moment to help her with the task .
When she pulled his shirt out off his pants her hands wandering on his tight abs ryan let his hand wander on the front of body feeling every curved he could find .
Reaching behind and cupping her bottom ryan lift her in his arm waisting no time she wrap her legs around his waist their lips never parting ,Ryan swirl around and found the first affordable place he could find which right now was the kitchen table.
She ddint seemed to mind when he praticly slam her on top ,her flower vase crashing on the ground and the table shaking .
Once again no time was wasted while she reached for his belt buckle Ryan yanked at the string of her dress with one pull the small string came undone and the black dress pool around her waist his pants fell around his ankle followed by his boxer which she hazardly pushed down ,Ryan yanked her dress up and nearly rip her panties off .
He took her right there on her kitchen table ,roughly ,hard ,no time for romance or sweetness ,thats what both of them wanted to feel after burrying one of their friend .
Afterward all they could hear was their breathing shallow deep and mostly really loud ,looking down at her ryan helped her into a sitting position when she roll her dress donw her thighs he notice the inprint his fingers had left on her thighs which would be bruised tomorrow .pulling his pants and boxer up he barely gotten them zip up that he reach to help her tie her dress behind her neck .
Helping her once more down the table he simply look at her she look back,they werent ashamed of what they done they were both adults unattached but yet it felt uncredibly akward all they did for a minute that seemed an eternity was stared at each other.
Slowly she reached for his hand and with much sadness and pain from loosing their friend she asked .
NAT: Will you stay with me tonight .
Ryan eyes widened and she sundenly felt ashamed asking for such a ridicule question but he kissed her cheeks and pull her into his arms .
RYAN: I wouldnt have it any other way .
NAT: Just for tonight ...i need you tonight .
RYAN: We all need one night sometimes ...to feel that were not alone .
He kissed her cheek again and she walked him to her bedroom ,she took from her drawer clothes to sleep in .when she turned back ryan was standing in the middle of her bedroom looking around her bedroom when his eyes met hers Ryan felt a bit out of place .
NAT: I'll just go to the ... she pointed toward the bathroom .
RYAN: ohh yeah yeah sure sure he said nervously letting her pass by him when her hands brushed his Ryan wanted nothing more then pull her into his arms and hold her all night long .
Looking around her bedroom ryan scratched his head unsure he began undressing himself first his tie,his dress shirt ,then his pants , leaving his boxer and tank top ,folding his clothes carefully on her dresser .
He sat down at the end of the bed looking around Natalia bedroom ,the queen sized bed took much of the space in her bedroom which was covered by an overswized bedspread with a white and black pattern and three decorative pillows complimented the assemble .Running his hand on top of the fluffy bedspread Ryan smiled even though he was a very neat person there was nothing like a woman bedroom which lately he rarely saw the sight of one .
When he heard the bedroom door open Ryan politly stood ,there she was wearing a 2 pieces aqua blue woven cotten pyjamas .Ryan couldnt simply take his eyes off her .it wasnt meant to be sexy but yet ryan had never see her looking so pretty.
Blushing at the way he was looking at her like she was a piece of chocolate cake .Ducking her head she decided it was better to look at the floor ,she felt his gazed heat up when she pass by him to her side of the bed ,ryan went to the other side his eyes never leaving her ,as they both pulled the bedspread .
After getting into bed they both stared at the ceilling in complete silence ryan hands nervously taping his belly above the covers .
NAT: Ryan !
The sudden sound of her voices startled Ryan for a second before he answer .
RYAN:yeah .
NAT: could you stop doing that your seriously getting on my nerve.
At her words his hands stop moving completly ,settling them behind his head so he wouldnt do it again .
RYAN: sorry ..am ..am bit nervous .
NAT: Nervous ! she snickered , we jsut screw each other brain out and your nervous ,
RYAN: when you say it like that ,i guess your right ...sorry about the bruised on your thighs .
NAT: nahh it's ok i enjoyed it .
RYAN: I know im good he say with too much proudness .
NAT: You didnt let me finish i said i enjoyed it for the good one minute he lasted .
Ryan lifted himself on his elbow and said .
RYAN: HEY... thats such a low blow .
When she laughed at him ryan fainted being hurt for a second and laugh with her but when they both remenber the events that brought them here they both once again remained silent staring at the ceiling .
RYAN: You think Calleigh will be ok .
NAT: I dont know ...today she ...she wasnt te Calleigh we know ..i think a part of her died with him ...do you ever get over that i dont know Ryan ...i really dont know .
RYAN : I miss him you know ..even thought i hated his teasing sometimes ...i gotten use to them and now i'll have to get use to not having them on a daily basis .
NAT: I know ..i think i'll mostly miss his smile ...god how many heart did he broke with that smile .
Ryan rolled his eyes even dead Eric Delko always managed to get the girl attention.
NAT: you think hes smilling down on us .
RYAN : yeah probably ...but i hope he wasnt watching 20 minutes ago cause he surely got a show.
Laughing Natalia slap his shoulder playfully .
RYAN: so huh ..do you want second rounds .
NAT: Dear god ryan your very romantic .
RAYN: Hey i aim to please ..im just asking out of courtesy .
Taping his cheek she laughed and said .
NAT: if you aim to please Ryan you shouldnt be asking for second rounds .
With that she laughed and turned on her side facing away from him .
RYAN : should i take it as a no .
NAT: The night not over Ryan ...just not now , am a bit tired .
RYAN: oh ok cool ...how about now .
NAT: no ...good night ryan .
RYAN: good night .
Ryan once again put his arm behind his head all he could do was stared at the ceiling ,after tossing and turning over and over in the bed Natalia got annoyed at him .
NAT: Ryan for the love of god just sleep will you .
RYAN: can ..can i just ..you know ...put my arm around you .
NAT: Will that help you go to sleep .
.
Blindly she reached backward for his arm and rolled over her waist holding it tightly agaisnt her stomach ryan settle behind her his face burried in her hair and his thumbs drawing little circles on her belly .
NAT: Never thought you were a cuddler.
RYAN: yeah ..there a lot people dont know about me .
NAT: mmm ...was all she answer and ryan knew then she was drifting into sleep ,he lay behind her spooning enjoying having a woman in his arms again ,he promised himself to remenber every little detail about that night ,her curves, her smell, the way she fitted perfectly in his arms .To her it was merely a one night stand with no tomorrow but to him he wished it was much more ,he wished she was his and only his .
Stretching his body into a cold and empty bed Ryan look up at the time has usual he had awaken before his alarm clock .
Throwing the blanket away from his body ryan jumped out of bed scratching his belly and yawning .Making himsefl some coffee he went in the living room while the pot pour down ,he turned the tv on the news and lay on his very clean carpet for his morning crouches .
he was almost done when he heard the front door slam stopping he was surprised to see jasmine storming inside .
RYAN: hey baby i thought you werent supposed to ..
Ryan didnt have time to finish his sentence she walked to him with a determined step and kicked ryan right in the ribs with her high heels .
Ryan felt his inside twist and he grunted in pain his breath catching in his throat, his body rolling away from her as he held his side , with half lid eyes he managed to look up at jasmine she was seeing red and yet he had no idea what he just did .
JAS; THIS WHAT YOU DO WHEN I GO AWAY RYAN WOLFE ...
RYAN: WHAT THE HELL JASMINE IT'S NICE TO SEE YOU TOO he grunted between painfull breath .
JAS; DONT YOU DARE RYAN WOLFE .
RYAN ; DONT WHAT ?
JAS: DONT TRY TO DENY IT ...MICHELE SAW YOU WITH THAT TRAMP AT MR SUNG... HE SAID YOU WERE PLAYING FAMILY WITH HER AND HER STUPID SON ...
Ryan managed to get himself int a sitting position .
RYAN : I just had diner with her ...i dont know what michele saw...
JAS ; YOU TOLD ME YOU WERE HAVING TAKE OUT AND WATCHING THE GAME ...YOU SAID NOTHING ABOUT HAVING DINER WITH THAT TRAMP...I TOOK THE FIRST FLIGHT BACK TO MIAMI AS SOON HAS MICHELE CALLED ...
RYAN: I ran into her thats all god you acting like am cheating .
Jasmine pushed Ryan back down on the floor with so much force that his head collided with the carpet now not only would he have sore ribs but he would have a very painfull headache .Jasmine leaned down to him pointing and waving her finger at him she said in a tone that would give hannibal lecter shiver .
JAS: Now you listen to me Ryan wolfe and you listen good ...if i ever learn again that your seeing her behind my back you will have hell to pay ...you hear me .
RYAN: Shes my friend Jasmine .
JAS: FRIEND MY A$$...YOU THINK IM BLIND OR STUPID ...NOW DID I MAKE MYSELF CLEAR .
RYAN ; yes ...
JAS: EXCUSE ME ...
RYAN; i said yes honey .
JAS: and ...
RYAN: And i love you ...
JAS: Good now get up am going to shower and my breakfast better be ready when i come out.
Jasmine walked out of the living room swirling her hips and humming as if nothing happened .Ryan sat once again leaning his back agaisnt the couch his right hand holding his side and his left hand in the back of his head where his head had had not been the first time Jasmine had lay a hand on him .he had seen her dark side many times during heated fight and each tiem he asked himself why he endures such abuse in this relationship.
When it was time to go to work Jasmine insisted to drive him to work which would mean she would also pick him up .
Wincing and holding his side when he climb the few step leading inside the lab Ryan turned around and saw Jasmine watching him from her car as if Ryan had anywhere else to go .
Horatio who was walking out of the lab held the door for ryan smilling .
HOR: Mr wolfe .
RYAN: hey H he said faintly.
HOR: You dont look well Mr wolfe ...anything wrong .
RYAN: ahh no im good H i got an headache and i think i strain a muscle while working out but other then that im perfect .
HOR: If you need to take the day off i understand .
Ryan looked back at jasmine who was still staring at him any other day he would have jump on the occassion to spend the day with her but right now she was far from being his favorite person , Horatio looked back to where Ryan was looking and saw Jasmine his girlfriend sitting in the car ,Horatio didnt miss the way Ryan body tensed .
HOR: Is that Jasmine .
RYAN: yeah she came back this morning .
HOR: Then spend the day with her ..i know your both working a lot lately so take this opportunity.
RYAN: Again H thanks but i still have work from yesterday to finish so no thanks .
Horatio simply nodded butt didnt miss the way ryan face crunched when he lifeted his arm to opened the glass door leading inside the lab .Putting on his sunglasses he turned back to where Jasmine was moment agao shooting the older lieutenant a mean glared before rolling her eyes ,turning around and getting back into her car , before driving away her tired screeching behind her.
Horatio wfollowed her with his eyes until she was out of sight tapping on his waist with his finger, he wonder if he should push ryan a bit more about his injuries .
stretching his arm over his head to reach for his firearms resting on the top shelf of his locker , Ryan winced in pain , a sharp throbbing pain shot through out his body ,Buckling his holster into his belt , he thought back about the event of the morning , he knew that jasmine could be hot tempered , something he kind of liked about her ,but this was plain right scary he done nothing to deserved this. He knew Jasmine didnt like his relationship with Natalia , her insecuritties showing each time he mentionned either Natalia or Joey name , so after a while he just stop talking about them , but that didnt mean he stopped seeing them , he just didnt mention it .Sure he felt bad about lying but it kept the peace inside the house , that was until this morning , where ryan saw an ugly side of hif girlfriend , one he never thought he saw .
But if Ryan had been a bit truthfull to himself he would have admit that yes Jasmine should be insecured about his friendship and that yes if Natalia would open the door to him he would jump in with both feet .But sadly it wasnt the case , Natalia didnt shre his feeling that he tried desperatly to hide deep down , But each time he found himself alone on a saturday night because his girlfriedn was once again , god knows where around the world , ryan found himself fightitng the urge to call her to invit her and joey to a movie or the park . But he never did even though sometimes they found themself spending saturday or sundays afternoon together but Ryan never pursue her.
All he had was that one night they spend together right after eric funeral , sometimes ryan wished it had gone differently ,that he should have pursue her ask her out properly, maybe then Joey would have been his and not some the son of a poor excuse of a father who never show any interest in him.
With a sight Ryan put his badge on his belt closing his locker door , he headed out to his lab his hand in his pocket ,he sure wish today would be a slow day has he didnt want to bend over and over picking up evidence with sore ribs .
then he saw the object of his affection , entranced in her work , ashamely ryan stared he never could help himself no mather what she did or what she wore or looked ryan found himself staring , he found it utterly cute when she play with her necklace or when the way her eyes would light up when joey would call her on her cellphone .To him she couldnt do anything wrong ,but everytime he cauht himself staring the guilt would hit him and Jasmine would scream in his head so Ryan went back to pretending .
But then she looked up form her work and smile brightly at him with a waved with his heat skipping a beat ryan match her smile and waved back , his heart beating faster when she walked out of the lab to meet him.
NAT: Hey , how was your weekend ?
RYAN: Ohh you know the usual !he smiled brightly
NAT: hummm let me guess , you play video games , clean and clean again she laugh punching his arm slightly.
RYAN: hey i did...other stuff ...
NAT: yeah liked what ? she smiled her arms crossed over her chest waiting for his answer .
RYAN: i ..i huh...i cleaned my car .
NAT: see told you ...clean and clean she laughed punching his arm again .
RYAN: Ok you got me ...he smile at her outburst .
NAT: so anyway to thank you for paying the diner last friday im inviting you to lunch this afternoon, that is if we can both make it to break.
RYAN: ohhh i...i 'd loved too but Jasmine in town and huh ...
NAT: Say no more i get it ... go spend some time with your girlfriend she smile playfully .
RYAN: rain check?
NAT: yeah sure ...i'll see you later ok ...
Has she walked away ryan caught himself staring once more , usually he would jump at any chance to spend with her but with Jasmine watching his every move that task was more difficult .
With his head down he went to work hoping that his mind wouldnt wander to a place that should be forbidden .