"You alright you look like you've seen a ghost?" Lexie frowned as she put down a tray full of drinks and shots.
"Yeah!" Tilly quickly answered to stop Lexie following her glare to see Jen.
"Cool. Lets get wasted" Lexie raised a shot glass.
"Yes. Definitely." Tilly raised a shot glass and clinked it against Lexie's and they both downed the intoxicating liquid in one. As it trickled down Tilly's throat she already felt it soothing the ache in her heart as she watched Jen. She continued to take shots off the tray.
"Wow, like your style!" Lexie nodded impressed and copied.
Jen and Mel sat in an awkward silence as they both nursed a glass of wine.
"You're not into this are you?" Mel smiled as she studied Jens face.
"I'm so sorry. It's not you it's me" Jen cringed "oh god. Did I actually just say that?"
They both laughed breaking the ice slightly.
"What I meant was I'm in a weird place at the moment. I'm not very good company." Jen took a large swig of wine as tears pricked in her eyes.
"It's fine" Mel smiled and placed a friendly hand on Jens.
Seeing this and mistaking it for a romantic gesture Tilly's stomach flamed with jealousy. She downed the last shot on the tray and grabbed Lexie's hand pulling her to dance.
"Not sure I've had enough shots to dance yet!" Lexie laughed but obliged anyway.
"Just be... Isn't that what you say?" Tilly smirked and pulled Lexie closer to dance against her.
"It is indeed. I've taught you well" Lexie winked and held onto Tilly's hips as they danced. By this point they had an audience of two lads rather excited by Lexie & Tilly dirty dancing in the middle of the bar. Tilly was oblivious to them but Lexie was loving the attention and called them over to dance. One danced either side of them making a Lexie & Tilly sandwich.
Jen slid her hand from underneath Mels. Although she knew Mel understood nothing was going to happen between them she didn't like anyone else touching her other than Tilly.
Feeling awkward at Jens reaction Mel quickly tried to change the subject.
"Someone's having fun anyway..," she laughed nervously nodding towards Tilly and Lexie bumping and grinding against each other and the two guys. Jen turned to look and physically sank in her chair as she saw Tilly moving against Lexie. Jens body showing how her heart felt. Sunk and dejected.
"Yeah. Looks like it." Jen sighed sadly. Tilly spun around and caught Jens eye. They stared silently at each other the rest of the room becoming a blur. Jen quickly looked away not wanting Tilly to see the hurt she was feeling.
"Oh one minute babe.." Lexie pulled away as she saw a guy she knew enter the bar.
"No worries. I'll get us some more drinks." Tilly smiled. Satisfied that mission was complete. She'd shown Jen she didn't care. Even if it wasn't true she'd shown it anyway.
Jen watched Lexie leave Tilly and couldn't help feeling relieved. Until she saw Lexie hand the guy some money and take a bag with white powder from him. Jen narrowed her eyes and watched Lexie make her way to the toilets.
"You alright?" Mel was watching Jen wondering what had managed to capture the attention she had craved all evening.
"Yeah I'm fine. Just going to nip to the ladies." Jen smiled and rushed off to follow Lexie.
Once Jen got inside the toilets Lexie was already locked into one of the cubicles. Jen quietly locked herself into the free cubicle next to it. She listened carefully and her suspicions were confirmed when she heard Lexie scraping a bank card on the toilet seat lid and heard the elongated sniff. Lexie was definitely taking coke. Jen sighed to herself. Sure she was no angel and had experimented while she was travelling but she knew Tilly wasn't like that and really didn't want her to be. She still cared for her and knew she should warn her however she also knew Tilly wouldn't appreciate this. Lexie had left the toilets but Jen had stayed locked in her cubicle trying to decide what to do. Should she mind her own business? Leave Tilly to it? She thought that she'd just leave the bar. Jen opened the toilet door and jumped a little when she saw Tilly at the sinks applying lipstick.
"Hey" Jen approached her nervously.
"Oh hi." Tilly successful hid her excitement at being so close to Jen. She continued to apply her lipstick.
"So you and Lexie having a good night?" It hurt Jen to ask as much as it hurt Tilly to hear. Jen was supposed to be the love of her life yet here she was nonchalantly asking if she was having a good time with another girl.
"The best" Tilly's smile was more than a little forced.
"I'm just here with -" Jen started but Tilly cut her off "Yeah Jen I saw." Tilly shrugged. Jen had wanted to explain about the blind date that was forced on her but decided against it seeing how little Tilly seemed to care. There was no point.
"What?" Tilly was looking in the mirror but at Jens face as she stood behind her. "I can tell you want to tell me something. What it is?"
Jen touched Tilly's arm gently and turned her to face her. Jen looked deep into Tilly's eyes melting her cool exterior slightly. "Be careful Tilly."
"Careful of what?" Tilly was almost whispering. Still feeling Jens hand on her arm and the genuine care pooled in her eyes.
"Just promise me you won't do anything stupid?"
"Why are you so bothered anyway?" Tilly was still whispering and neither knew how but their faces were now only inches apart.
"You know why." Jens bottom lip quivered slightly. Before Tilly knew what she was doing she had put her lips on Jens. Jen responded by welcoming them hungrily closing her mouth enveloping Tilly's bottom lip. The kiss got more passionate and Tilly pushed Jen into the cubicle locking the door behind them...
Jen pushed against Tilly on the door as they continued kissing. Both knew they shouldn't be doing it but didn't have the strength to stop. Jen pushed her knee forward making Tilly part her legs slightly. Tilly ran her hands down Jens back stopping on her behind to pull her even closer. Jen unbuttoned Tilly's jeans and slipped her hand down the front. Feeling how excited Tilly was already Jen moaned with excitement. All logic had gone. She wanted Tilly. The surroundings were a blur all they could see and feel were each other.
"Tilly!" Lexie was outside the cubicle. "You still in here babe?"
"Yeah. Sorry ill be out in a minute" Tilly panicked.
Jen instantly pulled away from Tilly. The magic lost. The surroundings suddenly front in her mind and unfortunately all logic was back. Tilly saw this happen. She saw Jens face change. Felt the electric charge between them disappear.
"This will always happen Jen. You and me. No matter how much we think otherwise, how many other people we see we'll always end up together. Like this. Because we can't help it." Tilly whispered and kissed Jen on the lips. Jen just stood in silence as Tilly left the cubicle. She couldn't argue. How could it? She knew Tilly was right.
TBC.