Sorry about such the weird chapter you guys! I think it's hilarious, and even though the people are OOC, they're still super funny! I wrote this chapter in a really weird/happy/giddy mood, so that's why it's a bit strange. But it's so funny!

Chapter 5

War Begins and Penal Tea!

Miki and Kumiko liked to arrive at school early, so they always went together. Miki's house wasn't so far from Kumiko's, so it wasn't hard to meet up. They were in class 3-A together, but that meant they were also in the same class as Takashi, Inui, and Koizumi. In Japan, the students all stay in the same classroom, so they always have the same classmates, and only the teachers move from class to class.

Kumiko opened the door to her classroom and saw Inui blending something vile looking in the blender. Takashi was right next to him, as if he was his protector. They had their tennis stuff with them. The two boys noticed the girls and suddenly Takashi grabbed his racket, he ran over to Miki and held her down.

"Hey! Let go of Miki!" Kumiko shouted.

Inui walked calmly over to Miki, and poured a cup of whatever he was making down her throat. Her swallows sounded painful, and she kept trying to spit out the liquid. There was a slight gurgle that came out of Miki before she passed out.

"What the hell? Let go of her, you perverts!" Kumiko yelled. She rushed at Inui and did a round-house kick to him in the head, then tied him up to a chair. She turned towards Takashi and did a flying sidekick at him. Kumiko took out a pencil from her pocket and threw it ninja-style at Takashi, it barely scraped him on the cheek before it flew and stuck to the wall.

While Kumiko was fighting Takashi, Inui took out a box-cutter that he had, because of his new blender, and cut the straps that tied him down. Inui got up and threw a cup of penal tea at Kumiko. She dodged it, but while she was distracted, Inui grabbed her and forced her head in the blender and made her drink the penal tea.

"Ugh! It's...It's disgusting and delicious at the same time!" Kumiko gurgled.

Inui took the wallet from her pocket and took away the money she had in there and her student id card.

"I'll take these items," Inui said.

He snapped his fingers and Takashi threw Kumiko and Miki outside of the classroom and locked the door.

"Give me back my money and id card!" Kumiko screeched while she was kicking at the door, trying to break it down.

On the other side of the door, Inui and Takashi couldn't go through the door, so they climbed out the window. They jumped out and landed on their feet. Momo was right next to the window, sulking.

"Excuse me, I have to go somewhere," Momo whispered. He climbed through a window and disappeared. Inui and Takasahi were confused, until they saw Aine skipping by happily.

Inui ran towards her, and before she could do anything, penal tea was going down her throat. Aine passed out right away. Inui took the id card that was in her pocket. He was stealing id cards so that the girls couldn't eat lunch or check out books from the school library. You could always replace the cards, but they cost money.

Luckily, Saori was looking for Aine, and saw the whole exchange. She ran over to Takashi and kicked him in the back. She quickly turned towards Inui and did a knife-hand strike to his neck, causing him to get knocked out. She turned back to Takashi, not wanting to have her back unguarded. She kicked the racket out of his hands. His face changed from burning-mode, to shy and confused. Saori took that opportunity and knocked him out the same way she did to Inui. She searched Inui's pockets and took back Aine's and Kumiko's id card, and Kumiko's money.

Kaido came by and saw her. He said, "What are you doing?"

Saori rushed over to Aine and picked her up and gave her a "piggy-back ride" to the infirmary, completely ignoring Kaido's question. Miki was also in the infirmary. Poor girls, Saori automatically knew that Inui must have given them his penal tea.

The bell rang and the nurse didn't question Saori about what happened. Saori ran to her class and said to the teacher, "A third year teacher needs me to help him with carrying stuff. So can I go?"

"Do you have the pass that says you'll help?" the man asked.

"No..."

"Well then, ha! All of the teachers know the code; if they want a student, then they need a pass!"

"Okay, then I need to go to the bathroom."

"How do I know that you're not tricking me again, like you did when you said a teacher needed you?"

"Do you want me to pee in front of the whole class? Because I will."

"Fine, but I will come with you and stand outside of the bathroom and wait for you."

"What are you, some kind of pervert? You want to follow me to the bathroom? Dis-gus-ting! You have a class to teach, you don't want to neglect them, just to follow me, do you?"

"Fine, then I'll send five of my most trusted students with you."

Saori walked over to the bathroom with five boys tailing her. She walked in, then walked out and said, "I need to return my friend's id card. I found it."

"Then how come you didn't tell the teacher that, eh?" Boy #1 asked.

"Because I needed to use the bathroom too." As if to make a point, Saori walked into the bathroom and stayed in there for two minutes. She ran out of the bathroom as fast as she could to class 3-A.

"Hey! Stop running!" Boy #2 shouted. Saori could hear all of the boys running after her.

She ran into the classroom and said, "Kumiko! Here!" She threw Kumiko's card at her and ran through the boys right back to her classroom.

"Wait! What are you doing here? What did you throw?" the teacher for the class shouted after her.

Saori made it back to class before the five boys and sat down. The boys and the 3rd year teacher ran in after her, panting.

"She ran to the third year class and threw something at one of the students!" Boy #5 tattled.

"I needed to return an id card I found, but I also needed to use the bathroom," Saori stated.

"You should have told me that," the 2nd year teacher said to her.

"It would be an inconvenience to you."

The third year teacher blurted out, "First, I find out that the door to my class is broken and then now this! A girl comes rushing into my class and throws something at one of my students! There was also a box-cutter on the floor with the school's name on it!"

"That's it! You're getting a detention, Toyama-san! And let's play the double game, you will have two and a half days of detention, and you know that that actually means? You get five days of detention! Let me list all of the rules you broke today: you lied to me, you didn't go to the office to return the id car instead, and you probably broke down the door to that classroom! You did outrun five boys and a teacher, you're strong, and you and a box-cutter that you left in the classroom, that you stole probably!"

"I didn't break down a door! I also didn't have anything to do with a box-cutter! Stop making up things that I didn't do! You break a lot of rules yourself, I know you drink between classes to make yourself feel better. Your wife left you and took your daughter, and you smoke pot in your garage, there's even the plant and everything!"

"You don't have any proof that I do, and how would you know any of these things?"

"You can learn a lot about your next-door neighbor. I also took a picture of you smoking." Saori took out the picture of the teacher, and showed him. Right after she showed him, she ran out the door and to the principal's office and showed him the picture and told him everything she knew about the teacher. The teacher, of course, got fired. The new teacher arrived right after Saori came back to class room, Aine was back too, from the infirmary.

The new teacher was a lady body builder. How...strange. She introduced herself as Ms. Matsu, and she taught English.

"Aine-san!" Ms. Matsu called out.

"Yes?" Aine replied.

"Repeat after me in English will you? The rose is not growing because the hose will not give it water."

"Zhe rosu is notu growing becuz the hosu will notu give it wata."

"Have you ever been to America, Aine?"

"Nope, never."

"Intesting..." the teacher wrote stuff down in her notebook. "Now Kaido-san! Repeat after me in English: I have a backpack full of books and school stuff."

"Watashi wa, bakkupakku full of books and school stuffo," Kaido repeated, half in Japanese, the other half in English.

The teacher wrote more stuff in her book and said, "Momoshiro-san!"

"Hmm?" Momo looked up from his book with a fried shrimp in his mouth.

"Repeat after me: I'm an arrogant boy who eats during class, and am very rude. I am also like a hippopotamus."

"I'ms a arruganu boy who eatsa du-rin classu, an am vey rode. I ams also like a hicocolokticapola."

"Okay class, I want you to read from your books and memorize page 50. We will discuss it tomorrow," Ms. Matsu said after writing about Momo in her book.

Later On

The bell rang, and it was now lunch time. Thank god. The day had been pretty bizarre so far. Lunch was going to be okay. Saori was walking when she bumped into Inui, she got into fighting position and said, "What's the matter Sadaharu-sempai?"

"Nothing, but-" Inui started to say, but he was interrupted by Saori running past him.

Saori ran past Ryoma's class and hear Eiji say, "I don't get it, bright and happy Aine can't change Saori's mean and troublesome ways."

Saori stomped into the classroom and shouted, "What did you say?"

Eiji looked nervous and replied, "I said, apple can't change swiss cheese sample to be good tasting because swiss cheese sample is rotten. I didn't say anything about you, I was talking about the market! Yeah!"

Saori put up her fist and punched Eiji in the gut. He doubled over groaning, before he fell to the floor. Saori kicked him and he rolled over.

Saori ran out of the classroom and bumped int Fuji. He smiled down at her and asked, "Why are so serious and angry all of the time?"

Saori didn't answer and ran away from him, she could hear him running after and asking, "Why are you running away from me, Saori-chan?"

Saori ignored him and ran into the girls' bathroom. Out side, she heard Fuji asking some of his fan girls, "Excuse me, can you go into the bathroom and ask Saori-chan why she's angry at me?"

"Of course we'll do it, Fuji-sama!" the girls squealed.

The walked in and asked Saori the question. Saori replied, "Tell him I'm not angry, I'm just PMSing!"

"The girls walked outside and told Fuji what Saori had said. Fuji shouted through the door, "Then how come you're only angry, and not having any other moods?"

Saori got herself ready and skipped out the door saying happily, "Hello, Fuji-sempai!" Saori ran away right after she said that. Finally, she reached the cafeteria, but all of the boy regulars were in front of her. Fuji came and cut Ryoma. Saori just stood back and watched them order their food. They were asking each other questions on what they should eat and were being very hesitant.

'They're taking a long time on purpose!' Saori thought as she waited in line. It was finally her turn. She ordered her usual stuff and went to sit with her friends. Just as Saori sat down though, the bell rang.

"Are. You. Freaking. Kidding. Me?" Saori shouted. She ran back to her classroom, eating her spicy noodles at the same time.

Saori slumped into the classroom. She felt sick to her stomach. She raised her hand and said, "Teacher! I need to go to the nurse! I need to throw up!"

"Oh my! What happened?" the teacher asked while writing down a nurse pass.

"I ate while running..." Saori grabbed the pass and ran to the nurse's office. As soon as she stepped foot inside, she threw up.

"Oh my goodness!" the nurse cried out. She went to the intercom and called for a professional janitor. And yes, only a professional janitor is allowed to clean up spilled body fluids.

Saori spent the rest of the day in the infirmary, resting. She slept most of the time since if was so boring. Finally, the school bell rang to say that school was out. The nurse wrote a note for Saori, saying that she couldn't do tennis today.

Saori slumped to the tennis courts. She was feeling terrible, but she wanted to watch the practices. A tennis ball came out of nowhere, hitting Saori in the stomach. She crouched over and threw up again.

Takashi and Oishi came running towards her.

"Are you okay?" Oishi asked. Of course, he was the mother of Seigaku. "We were just testing Takashi's Hydokyuu. We didn't mean to hit you. You better put up a sign, the professional janitor went home early today, so he can't clean it until tomorrow."

Arai ran to get Oishi and Takashi, he almost stepped on the vomit. He yelled out, "What the hell is that?

"Okay..." Saori slumped back to the infirmary.

"You're back again, Saori? What happened this time?"

"I got hit in the stomach, and I threw up again."

"Oh dear, I'll just give you some painkillers and some medicine for that upset stomach."

Saori took the medicine and went back to the courts. Tsubaki saw her and asked, "Are you okay? I saw what happened."

"Yeah, I'm fine. I'm just going to watch practice today," Saori said, handing the note to Tsubaki.

The girls looked over and they say Ryuzaki-sensei rushing towards them. She said, "I really don't care if you go to nationals or whatever, but are you okay?"

"Why are you asking? You just said you didn't care for us," Saori questioned.

"Well, I care for your health, but not for what you really do."

'What a messed up woman! Not caring if we go to Nationals or not,' Saori thought before she said, "I'm okay I guess..."

"That's good. Okay, bye."

Saori sat back down on the bench. She looked over to the boys' courts and saw Ryoma staring at them, with an evil smirk on his face. He threw a tennis ball up high and did a smash, it was his special cyclone smash. It landed right in the vomit and the vomit splattered everywhere. All of the girls that weren't regulars screamed and moved away.

Koizumi sighed and went to her water bottle. She unscrewed the cap and took a big swig. She froze, unable to move. The bottle dropped from her hands and out spilled a stick red liquid, it was penal tea! Koizumi passed out and the others ran to catch her. The other regulars took their water bottles and poured out the red liquid into the trash.

"Freshmen! Please clean up the red liquid on the courts, and after practice, we'll let you use the courts and play a little tennis," Tsubaki ordered. Tsubaki was confused about how the penal tea got there, so she just thought that the boys accidently switched water bottles.

"Yes ma'am!" the freshman shouted.

"I can't believe we have to do this," one of the freshman said.

"At least we get to use the courts after practice," another freshman said.

The freshman were done cleaning and the tennis team went back to practicing. Practice was soon over and the freshman got to practice for a little bit before they had to clean the courts and put away the nets. Ayumi came around telling all of the regulars (except Tsubaki) that there was going to be a meeting at Kumiko's house.

They all got a ride from Ayumi's limo driver to Kumiko's house.

"We have to do something!" Koizumi exclaimed. "The guys are trying to kill us with penal tea and vomit!"

"They can't kill us with that stuff, Koizumi," Miki explained.

"Still, didn't you hear what they did to Saori, Kumiko, Aine, and even you, Miki? They made you drink penal tea and tried to steal your id cards, for what, I do not know. But they're trying to harm us."

"I know, we do have to do something..."

Tezuka's House

The boys held a meeting at Tezuka's house. Tezuka didn't know about the plan, but they went to his house anyways, since it was the biggest. Tezuka was thoroughly confused about what the regulars were talking about.

"Tezuka-buchou, can you go downstairs and get us some tea?" Fuji asked.

"Of course," Tezuka went downstairs.

"Okay, now that Tezuka's gone, we can discuss the plan really fast."

"I see, good job Fuji. Now that the girls know that we're on a war with them, we have to come up with a plan to defeat them. They started the war, and now they have to taste their own medicine. They made Momo so depressed," Inui stated.

The guys were thinking of the advantages they had over the girls. Then...it hit them! They did have an advantage, and it was something that the girls had come up with themselves.

"I've got an idea!" the guys all shouted in unison.

Please review everyone! It makes me really happy and I would update much faster if you all reviewed. If you want to see what the characters, they're on my profile!