Hi! If you guys have been following this story, you probably might think I'm a tad bit crazy. And I get you. Sometimes the things I write might not make any sense. But they do to me, especially when I'm writing them. I guess I get caught up in whatever I am feeling that day – be it sentimental or moody or mad at the world. I get carried away in the whirlwind of emotions and I tend to put it all into writing. Certainly we all recognize the confusion of drawing the line between infatuation and love. Whenever I attempt to put myself in Caroline's shoes, it also tends to lead me to the strangest of paths. Well anyway, I just thought you guys should know. I hope I find a remedy for that. And if not, I still hope you guys enjoy reading this story and that in some way you can also relate to Caroline/my emotional whirlwind.

Now, speaking of Caroline… [read on]

Chapter 11 – Define Crazy

Minutes felt like hours, and hours, days. Caroline couldn't seem to find the strength to get up from where she was seated. Her head was still resting on the bedroom door, but now her legs were curled, with her knees bent and her arms wrapped tightly around them.

Caroline bit her lip, forcing back her tears. She had been at this for quite some time now, but she didn't seem to be running out of tears. What in the world was wrong with her? From crazy dreams to fighting with Klaus – everything felt so sudden and so unnatural. She must be going out of her mind. How else could she explain the ludicrous dream she had and the way she was feeling right now? She should have been tired, hungry, and sore from what happened – not heartbroken. She never expected to feel like this.

But she couldn't help it. Her heart felt like it had been pulled out of her chest, stomped on and smashed into a thousand pieces. She couldn't breathe and every time she thought about it, it made her cry. All of this didn't make sense.

This was Klaus Mickaelson we're talking about – the original vampire who time and time again showed that he didn't care about anyone else but himself. He was proud, selfish, arrogant and just plain evil. How come she couldn't just accept that and move on? How come she had to get on that plane? She should have known it was a trap. She should have known she was going to get hurt. How come she kept fighting against the facts? Caroline had let him in when she shouldn't have and what does she get for it – a broken heart?

"Stupid, Caroline. You're just so stupid" she said to herself aloud, banging the back of her head against the door. As much as she tried to stop it, her tears still fell.

"You should have never let him in. Not even for a second. You should have believed your friends."

Caroline wiped away the tears with her hands and brushed back the hair that was falling in her face. "Enough" she warned herself, taking a deep breath right after. It was then that she finally stood up, and walked over to the dresser. She grabbed her carry-on, placed it on the bed and began packing up her things.

In her haste, she didn't notice her bag tipping over the edge of the bed. As she went over to the bathroom to pack up her curling iron and the rest of her stuff, she heard a loud thump. She peered into the room and found that her bag was already on the floor and some of her clothes had fallen out in the process.

She quickly grabbed everything she needed from the bathroom and went back into the bedroom to fix the mess. She dumped everything back into the bag, without a care in the world if her clothes were wrinkled and her stuff disorganized. She checked under the bed in case anything had landed there, but was surprised to find a seemingly large book instead.

Curious, she pulled it out from underneath and dusted it off with her fingertips, searching for a title. But there wasn't anything written on the front or the back. She was about to open the book, when an unexpected knock came from the door.

She froze.

"Caroline"

She knew she couldn't escape even if she tried. He would eventually find her if he wanted to.

"Leave me alone. What part of get out do you not understand? I do not want to see you" Caroline cautioned, placing the book on the bed and walking over to the bedroom door leading to the hallway.

"I just have something I want to say to-" he began, sternly.

"Then say it" she interrupted, her hand reaching for the knob, attempting to lock it.

Suddenly, the door was swinging inches from her face, and she instinctively jumped back. Caroline would have fallen over if hadn't been for strong arms that caught her. It was his strong arms- Klaus Mickaelson.

Embarrassed, she quickly broke free of his hold and stood so that they were face to face. Before he could say anything, she raised her hand and slapped him – hard.

"Okay, I deserved that" Klaus said, rubbing his jaw.

She wasn't done yet. She surprised him when she kicked him in the nuts and punched him in the face once more. He keeled over, trying to catch his breath.

"You deserve more than that. Kol does too," she claimed strongly. "Where is your brother anyway?"

It took more than a few seconds for Klaus to recover. Caroline held her fists in the air, readying herself for a fight. But when Klaus finally looked up to her, straight into her eyes, there wasn't anger or hatred, but a profound sense of sadness. "He's… around. I will deal with Kol. Right now, let's leave him out of this. Besides, this is not about him."

She didn't notice that she had slowly lowered her fists. He made his way over to her and stood mere inches away.

"You can pound me some more if that's what you want to do, but listen to what I have to say first" Klaus said softly, without any hint of sarcasm in his voice.

Caroline found it hard to believe. She was still angry with him, and was still not over what they had done to her just hours, or was it already a day before. "Why should I even listen to you? What else is there to say, huh? Your master plan of having "no plan" was really smart. I've got to hand it to you –"

"Stop." Klaus scolded, before she could even finish her sentence. He grabbed hold of both her hands that had formed fists at her sides.

"Don't say a word. Just listen and I promise then you can back to hitting me, running away from me, or whatever the hell you feel like doing. I have no idea what plan you have up your sleeve but I have something I need to say and it would be best if you stopped interrupting."

She was about to spit in his face, but thought otherwise. What's the use anyway? A big part of her, the part which she was trying as much as she could to suppress, was curious and begging her to at least hear him out. This side of Caroline was getting the better of her, especially with his close proximity. She didn't like it but found herself nodding in response.

Klaus let go of her hands and began to pace back and forth. "But first, why did you come Caroline?"

"Excuse me?" she asked, taken aback by his random question. She expected his explanations, not her interrogation.

"Before I say what I have to say, I just need to know this – why did you come?" he asked once more. This time he finally stopped pacing and was looking straight at her. Caroline was surprised by the honesty in his voice.

She wanted to lie. Really, she did. But the answer to his question was probably already written all over her face. Him. That's the reason she came. It was all because of him and the dreams that would never stop haunting her. Well, he didn't need to know that part of the story.

It must have been the way he was looking at her that made Caroline shudder. She answered him truthfully, startling herself. "You. Now does that make you happy? Is that what you wanted to here? God knows why I was so curious and persuaded by those stupid dreams… Quite frankly, I just needed to know what the picture was all about and why you brought me here in the first place. That was the plan, and then that plan turned into wanting to torture you for tricking me and to take revenge for all the unfinished business we had in Mystic Falls. But now that I know what YOU were up to, I honestly wish I didn't come."

"Oh wait, on second thought, I'm glad that I do" Caroline insisted, trying to convince herself with her own words. It was better that she found out the truth. Now it would be easier to hurt him – to kill him even.

He gritted his teeth before saying, "Curiosity killed the cat Caroline." The sincerity in his face had now shifted to anger, or was it exasperation. Caroline couldn't tell which of the two, but what she did know was that Klaus wasn't happy. And neither was she.

"Then why did you have to ask me? Oh I get it. You just want to shove it in my face and remind me that I'm the stupidest girl in the world for actually falling for all of this; that I acted like a child. All along you wanted to kill me, and I made it so easy for you. Well congratulations then. Can you just be done with it and stop beating around the bush? All this teasing and bickering is getting old." Caroline argued, folding her hands across her chest.

Klaus was stunned silent.

"Well? Now the cat's got your tongue." Caroline said sarcastically

He sighed, running a hand through his hair before responding. "No, love. You don't understand. That's not the point. I'm starting to think that I shouldn't even tell you anymore. It's better that you're furious with me – easier."

"What are you talking about?" Caroline screeched. She was already fed up with all this talk, which seemed to be going nowhere.

"In the beginning it really was a game. I was angry with you for distracting me and using your charm to outwit me. I was mad because you lied to me and made me look like a fool. I wanted to get back at you for what you had done and I didn't want the Salvatores or Bonnie to get in the way. I had to draw you out from the herd and then attack. That was the plan, and it was a damn good plan – until you actually showed up."

It was like Caroline didn't hear a thing he said. Was Klaus actually telling her the truth? How much of it was real and how much of it was make-believe? She couldn't tell. "And Tyler, was he just collateral damage for you? How about all of my friends? Stefan used to be your comrade – at some point even brother, how could you do this? Don't you think that everything you have done is already enough pain to last me a lifetime? Because it is."

Caroline could feel the tears springing in her eyes, but held them back. She would not be weak.

Klaus held a finger to her lips. "Shhh, did you hear what I just said love? That was the plan. It was the plan before you set foot in Paris, the plan before you got rat-arsed in a random pub and had dinner with me at the gardens. It was the first plan in a thousand years, that I regret making."

Caroline slapped him once more. Klaus held his jaw with the palm of his hand and gave her a serious look. She could tell by his clenched fists and his tense expression that he was fighting the urge to hit her. But to what end? She'd rather get this over with. These confused feelings she's been having and all these crazy dreams were misplaced. She wanted to believe in the good in Klaus – a changed and honest man who she could take into her light. But no, he is and will always be stuck in his own darkness. She should just put him in his place, get on a plane, and go home. That would put a stop to it all.

What makes him think that he can say these things to her and she would actually believe them? It's true that his behavior has been odd since she's seen him in London – but it doesn't erase the fact that he almost tried to hurt her again. Who is he trying to kid? Has Klaus gone mental? She couldn't help it. Caroline laughed.

"Seriously Klaus, that's funny. You almost had me there. But how stupid do you think I am? Why should I believe anything you say when everything that comes out of your mouth is a lie? Have you ever told me the truth? I don't think so."

Klaus looked over her shoulder and saw the black book on the bed.

"Did you open it?" he asked, pointing to where the book was sitting.

Caroline cocked her head in that direction and only stole a quick glance before looking back at her enemy once more. She shook her head. "Not yet. I was about to—"

Klaus didn't let her finish. He grabbed hold of her arm and pulled her towards the bed. He used his free hand to retrieve the book and held it out for her.

"Go ahead."

Caroline didn't seem to notice the serious yet amused look on Klaus' face.

"What if I don't want to?" she insisted.

Klaus shoved the book into her hands. He seemed insistent. Through gritted teeth he said, "Just do it."

She took hold of the book with one hand and used the other to open it up. After all, there was nothing to lose. It's not as if the book would be laced with vervain or anything. She flipped through the pages and realized that it wasn't actually a book. It was a sketchpad – his sketchpad. He must have hidden it under the bed when Caroline caught him sitting next to her earlier in the day.

Her jaw dropped as she stared at the first page. It was her mirror image on paper, another sketch of Caroline brushing the mane of the horse the night of the Original's party. She flipped to the next page and it was still a sketch of her. This time it was a simple close-up candid portrait of her laughing, with her hair blowing in the wind. She didn't even dare to turn the page over.

She dropped the book on the bed and some of the loose pages fell out and scattered in the process.

Right now, that was the least of Caroline's worries. She didn't know what to say or what to believe anymore. One minute she was so certain that he had lied to her and insistent that she had to hurt him. But right now, after seeing the sketches, those feelings were replaced with sadness and longing. It was like her anger vanished into thin air and what was left was a serious case of confusion. Her heart was thumping in her chest and she couldn't quite catch her breath.

"I'm telling you the truth Caroline, believe it or not. I didn't want any of this to happen. I know you were curious. I expected that much, but when you actually came and when I saw how excited you were and how carefree, I just – it was like it sparked something within me. I was watching you from a far when I realized that it wasn't your fault that I got distracted in the first place. It may have been your intention, but even when you weren't trying, there I was, gravitated to you. The truth is, I blamed you for the way you made me feel – a feeling so foreign to me and yet so strong that when you let me down and I found out that you were just leading me on, I snapped."

Caroline was silent.

Fire flicked in his eyes as he continued. "It was wrong of me to do or attempt to do what I wanted to and I understand that you have no reason to trust me. But I meant what I said before, now more than ever – the small town boy and small town life wouldn't be enough for you. You deserve so much more. I tried to stay away, believe me I tried, but even when I was planning my revenge, I was drawn to you."

Caroline raised her fist and was about to punch him but instead all the tears she was holding back, fell. It was no use trying to fight a battle she knew she couldn't win – especially when every bone in her body begged otherwise. "But you sired Tyler. You almost killed everyone that I care about in this world. You even tried to kill me in my dreams and the dreams turned into wanting you so bad. You saved me twice but then you keep trying to kill me. Everything is so muddled, and I don't understand how we came to this and—"

Klaus pulled her into his arms and hugged her. It was the maddest, most unexpected, and careless of actions between sworn enemies, but for a second there, they were just two people drawn in by gravity – and it felt right. She sobbed against his chest although she didn't hold him back. Her arms were at her sides, still in clenched fists. He was just as tense although Caroline could hear his heart beat. It was beating just as fast as hers. For some reason, and as foolish as it may sound after all they have been through, it felt like she belonged there, like she had always meant to be in his arms – that suddenly all the shadows and confusion, at least in that instant, turned into light just like her dream.

Klaus eased up and held her until her tears subsided. He didn't know how she would react as soon as he let her go, but he didn't have much of a choice. When he did, he was surprised that she suddenly slumped to floor. He wasn't able to catch her this time around.

Caroline had intentionally dropped to the floor and was now holding her face in her hands. Klaus knelt down beside her and as he saw Caroline's expression shift from anger to sadness, it tugged at his heart – one that he didn't even know he had. It was uncanny for him to be this sensitive and to be honest with anyone other than himself. It was unlike him to feel sorry for another person, for Caroline of all people, especially when they were sworn enemies.

They aren't even blood-related. Klaus had always cared about his family in his own albeit rubbish manner of showing it. But this – to care about Caroline's feelings and to lower his pride – was this what it had come down to? He couldn't contain himself any longer. His feelings towards his family he could always keep to himself but this… it was all too strange and yet overbearing.

Klaus rose to his feet. He could walk away. He could forget he even said anything and pretend all of this was another lie. He was used to being alone – used to manipulation and deceit, of playing games and pleasuring himself to other people's demise. He took one step forward but made the mistake of looking at Caroline one last time.

It was then Klaus realized he couldn't walk away even if he tried. Caroline was still on the ground with her face buried in her hands. She was confused and he knew that feeling all too well because he felt the same way. He couldn't abandon her now; not with the way he was drawn to her. He found himself crouching back next to her and the words just spilled out on their own.

"It really was a game Caroline, do you hear me? It was- past tense. As you probably know by now, it is no longer a silly game to me, and even though I've tried my hardest to deny it, I can't keep it in anymore. I can't keep up this bad boy façade, all this darkness and hatred, when all I really want to do is drown in your light. For some reason, and God knows what exactly, I care about you. It's the crazy most damnable thing. I can't seem to recognize myself, but I don't care anymore. Even when I planned to kill you, I had dreams about you – dreams where I wanted you so bad, and I'd get up and still want you. Don't you know how foolish this sounds? Well I do. You scare me Caroline Forbes, and I've never been scared in my entire life – except of my mother. And she's still out there. And although it is highly unlikely that you believe anything I just said, all I know now is that I had to be honest with you, especially after Kol stupidly…"

It was Klaus' turn to be interrupted. Caroline held a finger to his lips. "You're talking too fast I can't seem to keep up."

He was staring at the floor now, lost in thought, lost in what else he wanted to say or maybe he had already said too much. But if this was not a proclamation of love or at least something like it, Caroline didn't know what was. Oh Klaus Mickaelson, from confusion to anger to sadness to longing, she had finally realized that deep down this was what kept nagging at her all along. All the times she's been confused, thought about Klaus more than she should have and even dreamed about him – it was because she cared. It wasn't just something she made up in her head. It was real.

Even when she hated him, she wanted to know where he was. Without even realizing it, Caroline had already let him in. It all began that night he had thanked her for her honesty and gave her the sketch. Now it was his turn to be honest and she was more than thankful. This honesty – it's not what anyone could expect from him, not then, not now, not ever—but he was giving it to her. He was letting Caroline in too – at least, she'd like to think so.

This is supposedly the part in fairytales where the prince usually gets the princess and they live happily ever after, but here Caroline was, sitting in front of someone who was no prince at all. He is still considered the enemy, the one person who shouldn't be trusted. But she couldn't bring herself to walk away. It was the most damnable thing and she's been fighting it for so long to even recognize the truth behind it.

Now she couldn't deny it any longer.

"It's okay" Caroline found herself saying, pulling herself to her feet. Klaus followed suit.

"I beg your pardon?" Klaus looked at her incredulously as they stood eye to eye.

"I may never understand how or why this has happened. But there isn't any use in denying it. Even when I hated you, like you said, I was always drawn to you. I had the craziest dreams about you. I always felt that you were watching me, and whenever I lost that feeling, it scared me. I've been confused for the past few months but the second I'm in your arms, it's like all of that disappears. I don't understand it, but I gravitate to wherever you are, and that's what brought me here. I wasn't trying to escape anything, nor was I looking forward to getting killed. I'm realizing now, it was just an excuse. The truth is, I just needed to understand how I felt – and now I know."

Caroline was surprised at her own words, especially when about a minute ago she was prepared to knock him out and run for the hills.

"And what is this that you know?" Klaus inquired, interrupting her thoughts, his voice soft.

She couldn't stop the truth from pouring out. "You may have attempted to kill every single person that I care about in Mystic Falls and even planned to torture me, but in spite of all that, I cannot walk away from you. I should be steaming mad at you right now knowing everything about your games but I'm not. I want to be but I'm stupid. It would be so easy for me to hate you and to want to kill you, but that's not how I feel. Do I need to spell out the obvious for you? I cannot believe you are even asking me this question. Let me put it simply. You were right – the small town boy and life will never be enough for me." Caroline paused before admitting, "But you are." She whispered her last sentence that it would have been barely audible to a normal human being. But there was nothing normal about these two – not their vampire state, not their strong feelings for each other.

The cat's out of the bag this time though. The minute Caroline said it, that she cared about Klaus more than she would have wanted, she knew she couldn't take it back. That was okay. She wasn't lying, and because of what she said, her heart suddenly felt at ease and everything seemed to be right in the world. Take away all the pain and their history; this would have been easy. She cared about him – might even love him. But that wasn't the case, was it? Its more than complicated and Caroline wasn't sure if it was really love at all.

As Klaus took a step towards her, she could feel her breath catch. At that moment he was no longer the alpha male, headed to devour his prey, but a man so deeply enchanted by her presence. She was humbled. Neither of them cared about the consequences. She wanted this. She wanted him.

When they finally stood mere inches away from one another, Klaus used his right hand to cradle her face. Caroline leaned against it and found herself smiling.

"I am?" He was asking her permission as he repeated what she had said just a few seconds ago. Klaus couldn't believe what she had just admitted. He, the sworn enemy of everyone in Mystic Falls, was enough for the likes of the beautiful and carefree Caroline Forbes? He wasn't going to second-guess this, not right now when they seemed to be on the same page.

"You are." She whispered back.

That was when they both finally gave in. Klaus kisses her forehead first, and Caroline closes her eyes in response, entranced by the mere proximity of him. He then kisses the bridge of her nose before finally meeting her lips. As soon as they touch, he realized that it was way better than he ever dreamed it would be. He had made the right choice when he chose her. She tasted so warm, so lovely, and so sweet. It was intoxicating and he wanted it all. He would never have his fill of her, but he wouldn't stop trying. As she responds with equal passion, Klaus is lost.

Caroline felt just as shaken to the core. In a matter of seconds, their kisses turned from playful to passionate – not that she minded. This was where she wanted to be, and when their lips touched it was like a newfound energy and happiness engulfed her. She would not let him go. Caroline wrapped her arms around his neck while Klaus rakes his fingers through her hair, holding her close. His tongue, oh that tongue, stroked a fire within her as he plunges again and again. He bites her lip teasingly and Caroline couldn't help but moan.

This seemed to wake Klaus up from their passionate haze. It took all of his strength to keep himself from kissing her again, especially with Caroline looking up at him with pouty delectable just-kissed lips. He maintained his focus by looking into her eyes instead – which was actually a mistake. He could see, mirrored in her eyes, just as much desire as he had for her.

"Caroline, sweetheart. I don't –" he begins, trying to find reasons why they shouldn't. But Caroline has other ideas.

She kisses him before he could put in another word, grabbing hold of the back of his head with her hands, desperate for more of his heat. She cradles her body between his and it was all the permission he needed. Klaus growls in response.

He kisses her neck as he lifts her up into his arms and in a matter of seconds Caroline is sitting on the dresser and everything that was on it is falling to the floor. Her back crashes into the mirror and as soon as Klaus hears this, he carries her into his arms once more. She doesn't remember how she managed to do so, but in removing the pieces of glass that pierced through her back, she removes her own shirt. As they move against the wall, the cabinet, against the wall again and finally onto the bed, they manage to remove the rest of their clothing, except for their unmentionables. Everything around them is a mess but neither one of them cares.

As Caroline lies beneath Klaus against the plush covers of the bed, she can't help but be attracted to his warmth. She wraps her legs around his waist, cradling him to her. When he suddenly stops kissing her and tries to break free, she wraps her arms around his neck. It wasn't what Caroline thought it would be though. Klaus looks into her eyes and shakily says, "I won't be able to stop."

He is actually afraid of her. This hybrid, the man who has lived for more than a thousand years and terrorized hundreds, is suddenly afraid of intimacy. Caroline couldn't help but wonder if he's ever been in this position before, or if it's the first time he has cared this much about someone other than Rebekah or himself. This honesty humbled her. It wasn't a secret. She wanted him. She needed him.

Caroline runs her fingers down the side of his face, his neck, to his chest and finally to his heart. As she listens to his heartbeat once more, she can tell that it matches her own. She kisses him there, dead center and he groans, maddened. Once again, this is all the permission he needs.

Passion takes over. Everywhere Klaus touches burns, and Caroline finds herself reaching up to him, wanting him – wanting this more than anything she's ever wanted. She could live in this – die in this – and her last coherent thought is simple.

As absurd as it may sound, she might have just fallen in love with this man.