"I'm so happy you're back. I missed you!" I couldn't stop crying, I missed him so much.
"Awww don't cry, babe. I'm happy I'm back too, I missed you so much." He hugged me as I began to cry in his shoulder.
"Oh this is pathetic!" Phenex stormed out of the room angrily. I have no Idea why but he did. I looked up at Izac confused.
"Don't worry about him baby, you're with me now. I will protect you." The tears kept flowing and he kept hugging him until I had no more tears to cry. I kissed him, I felt him smile under my kiss. I was with him again. I was reunited with my beloved Izac.
"Hey there lover birds," I heard Dean say as he waddled his way very poshly up the stairs.
"Hi." My voice way low but echoed with seriousness.
"Aye, what's wrong with you?" A smirk spread across his face, I so wanted to slap him but it took all my energy to compose myself and convince myself not to.
"Nothing, I'm fine. I'm just not exactly in the mood to put up with assholes." His face dropped.
"Shame Dean!" Sam chuckles as he walks up the stairs. He nodded to Izac and I as he walked inside, carrying weapons and bags.
Dean grumbled under his breath and stomped away as he fumbled inside angry. Izac laughed when dean walked inside.
"You haven't changed at all. I have missed your humour and attitude." He chuckled.
I smiled as he fisted his hand through my hair, he leant down to kiss me and I was consumed.
The porch light was on, everyone was in bed and though I was tired I couldn't sleep. I opened the door and stood out on the porch, taking a deep breath and pulling my hair out of the hair tie. I shook my head so my hair fell into place. Phenex sat staring into the night, sipping a glass of scotch.
"You look gorgeous, you know that." He smirked. I couldn't help but smile.
"Thank you but you're full of shit, you know that." I chuckled.
His eyes brows twitched. "You sure know the way to a man's heart."
"And you know how to lie extremely well, not including this time though." I smirked as I sat down next to him.
"I got to admit that a girl with attitude like yours is extremely attractive." His face dropped suddenly. "I once fell in love with a girl, and she was just like you. She loved me and I loved her but we couldn't ever be together. She was better off with the other man she loved."
"What happened to her?" he looked so sad, so heart broken. I didn't know why but his expression was sorrowful and I can't bare the sight of him like that.
"She died, but I found her years later." His eyes began to glitter as if he was going to cry, and a hard line across his jaw began to become visible. "I don't understand if she was dead, then how did I find you find years later?"
His words confused me. I didn't understand what he was meaning, it was as if he was talking in a riddle and I was supposed to figure it out. If that's what he was trying to do, he is failing because I don't understand the importance behind his meaningful words.
He took a long deep breath almost as if he had forgotten to exhale. We sat in silence for minutes and eventually I could no longer contain my frustration. "Phenex, please answer my question! I must know." My voice was staunch but at the same time it was high pitched.
"Do you really want to know?" His voice was cold and emotionless.
"Yes." I whispered, intimated by his tone and body language. For some reason I was excited, scared, angry, annoyed and intimated all at the same because of this one man. His tone was hushed and full of emotion, he sounded passionate and loving. It took me by surprise. He was being sensitive for once in his dramatic life.
"I envied my brother. He is with the girl I love. I know he and I have issues but I envy him. I can have nearly everything I want and the one thing that I don't have that I'm pleading for is the woman my brother has. I have a habit of trying to steal the women my brother has because I'm the oldest, I want to feel powerful and all mighty but unfortunately that's not the way it works. I love you, Faith. You're an amazing and gorgeous girl, but I know deep down inside that you're better off with my brother. He is someone of a kind personality, and a good heart. He loves you dearly. I might be a selfish person but I want you to be happy. I've always wanted you to be happy. You are an angel with the ability to be reincarnated. Every 50 years you are reborn into a life where you grow up normal and in each of your new lives you meet Izac and I, and you always falls in love with one of us. But the disappointing part is you always go for my brother, never me. I'm always in second best and it sucks. No one has ever seen the real me. I'm actually a very sensitive guy who cares a lot but the family I come from I had to harden up and stop being weak. I never wanted to become the way I am but I had to, to survive."
I began to cry, I never knew. I never suspected he ever had an emotional bone in his absolutely delicious body. He had taken me by surprise.
"1000 years ago there was a war in heaven. Lucifer had decided it would be entertaining to kill Jonas an angel. Lucifer threatened to kill Izac and me, but you wouldn't allow it. You made a deal with the cross roads demon that in order for Izac and me to keep living and not die you would sacrifice your life, as long as you were able to be reincarnated every 50 years. So you could be reunited with us. "
I have forgotten how to breath. I can't stop crying and I'm overwhelmed, surprised, scared, sad, happy. I feel an extremely odd emoticon towards Phenex, which is lust.
Phenex stood up and leant over me, using his finger to stroke my chin. "I know you love me, I don't expect you to admit it but I know you do. But I want you to be happy Faith.
"And because I love you I am willing to sacrifice the way I feel about you so you can be with my brother. As I said, I believe you will be better off with him rather than me anyway. Izac is a good person, I can honestly admit I am a horrible person." He sighed.
He walked back to his chair, sat down and skulled the last mouthful of his scotch. I stood up and walked towards Phenex. I elegantly sat down on him so I was facing him. His head hung sad and depressed.
My voice was quiet and almost like a mouse. "Phenex, you don't have to be ashamed to be emotional sometimes." I whispered.
"I feel weak being like this, all depressed and over flowing with practically nothing but lust." His words were like a song.
"Why do you feel practically nothing but lust?" I asked, sounding confused.
His breath was ragged and sharp. "Because I love you and all I want to do at the moment is make you mine. To be selfish and not share you with my brother." He looked away from me, he couldn't look me in the eyes almost as if he were shy or embarrassed.
A smile pressed across my lips. Using my fingers I moved his head so he was looking at me directly in the eyes, he looked away. "No, look at me." My voice was quiet but harsh. I stared deep into his captivating hazing eyes.
"I don't understand why you are ashamed, it's perfectly normal to fall in love and want to be selfish." His facial expression changed, he was jaw line began to harden as if I had pissed him off.
"Yes its normal, but to continuously fall in love with your brother's girl? " His voice was harsh but filled with good reason. "I just want to be with you, to love you but I can't. For once I can't have something go my way. It has changed me in ways you will never be able to know because you're with him."
Tears were prickling in my eyes. I couldn't help but let the tears flow.
"I'm so sorry, I didn't mean for you to cry." Phenex look generally sorry, his facial expression expressed his discomfort of me crying. I got off him as he stood up and began to walk away.
I reached for his hand yanking it back. "No please don't leave." I murmured.
He turned around and pinned me to the wall. Not touching me, his arms on both sides of my head, staring deep inside my soul. We stood there for what seemed hours but in reality it was only minutes. He ran his fingers down my cheek to my neck and over the tops of my breasts. I got goose bumps under his touch as he ran his fingers over my stomach and stoped just before he reached the top of my skirt. He never took his eyes off me as he leant forwards so our lips were inches apart. I could feel his cool breath gush me in the face, the strong sent of scotch was tranquilizing.
"I love you, Faith."
His words were calm and collected. He smirked, turned around and walked inside. I didn't realize I was holding my breath. I began to gasp for air, he didn't even kiss me and I was already consumed. Then it dawned on me.
I love both Phenex and Izac.
"I can't believe I admitted I love her, god I'm an idiot! Now she is going to go and brag to her precious Izac that I can be emotional, great...Then I will have an argument with Izac and I will want to punch the shit out of him, Fuck! Why do I do this to myself?"
I hit my arm against the wall as the voices in my head bitched and yelled at me for being too care free.
You know when you act care free you always get yourself into more shit than usual? It mocked.
"Shut Up!" I screeched as I grabbed full chunks of my hair, pulling them and trying to cover my ears. The voices wouldn't shut up and leave me alone.
Fuck this I need a scotch. The sensible part of my subconscious was right I really do need another scotch to cope with all this shit.
"Phenex, what the hell happened to you? You look like you haven't slept for days."
Dean's voice echoed through my head practically pounding my ear drums, I wasn't in the mood for attitude from other people let alone the attitude the voices are giving me.
"Just a discussion with Faith that's all, don't worry about it and don't you dare ask me about it because I really don't have the time nor the patience to put up with your shit!" My tone was harsh and loud, so I could get the point across.
"Oh ok, well anyway isn't Faith hot. God damn Izac is lucky to be a banging a hot chick like that." He chuckled.
My face turned red, the anguish, fury and annoyance vanished from my body I was beyond angry. I turned around grabbed Dean by the neck and lifted him to the wall.
"Shut the fuck up you bastard , I suggest you do me and you, more so you a favour and never EVER talk about faith like that EVER again, GOT IT?!" I snarled.
"Phenex! LET HIM GO!" Faith screamed from the door way. She ran over to Dean as I dropped him on the ground. Dean held his hand to his throat and glared at me with fury and determination to have his revenge.
"As long as I make myself clear, Dean, I won't do it again!" I growled through my teeth.
"Phenex, I suggest you leave and come back when you're not acting like a total dick." Faith glared at me as if she wanted to hurt me. For the first time I was intimated by another person.
"I was just leaving any way." I snapped as I stomped out of the room.
If it wasn't for Faith stopping me I would have just let Dean dangle there quickly loosing breath and eventually letting him die.
Why can't I just not love her, my subconscious asks me, expecting me to know the answer.
I need some space. I flew to a lake and just sat there and cried. I loved her and I can't have her.
It tore me apart.
Hey guys :) So .. What you guys think ? remember the more reviews the more chapters i'll post :) & Thank you too all the people that review my stories and the people who read them but don't review them ! I wouldn't continue my writing if it wasn't for you 3
Kiimii xxx