Oohhhhh gawd. I'm on a role! the hole 'Ania coming home' thing is what I have been waiting for! this is when it get's interesting. you guys have seen her darkest secret! I really hope you like it! if you have any questions, let me know! I love all the comments that have been posted, and thank you!

this is Chapter 11! I started this story 4 months ago, wow, it will be exactly 4 months on the 15 th of february (the same day as my tumblr's first birthday :D)

I realize that I forgot a song last chapter so this is the one for it: Home ~ Momford & Sons

This is one of my Favorite songs/ bands and they have helped me with a lot of things.

also, Ania is slightly based off of me. the self harm, personality, the past events in her life. I hold her very dear to me.

if any of you EVER Need to talk to someone. I'm here for you.

anyway

this ones song!

Lana Del Rey~ lucky ones (DEMO)

I was finally leaving. 'Thank God' I was running around my room, getting all the things to put in my suitcase. Paul had left the day before, something about Rachel. I had gotten all my things, when I looked at my dresser. Walking up to it I stopped at my sock drawer. 'I said I wouldn't do it after this week, but I miss it' I thought. 'Do I bring them?' I took a deep breath, and pulled it open, looking at the sock with the blades in it. pausing for a minute, staring at it. when someone started to come down the stairs. Without thinking, I threw the bag into my suitcase, pushed it to the bottom, and closed it as my mom came into the room.

'You ready?'

'Yeah' I smiled at her, I saw she was not as happy as she was pretending. 'Why should I ask if she is alright, she never did when I was here' I grabbed my case, and walked out to the truck, and said goodbye to my step-dad.

The drive was filled with my mom talking to me, trying to get me to talk about who knows what, I didn't really care I just wanted to go home, and see Seth.

'You seam happier'

'Huh, what? Yeah'

'Maybe, this summer, You can come back, for your graduating year?' It was more of a statement, not a question.

'mom, I'm not going to stay here, not Forever'

'Why? if your doing better, come back home.'

'Not now mom. I don't want to talk about it.'

'You will be fine. you just needed a break'

'I started to cut myself again, mom.' 'I'm happy in La Push. not here. I can't stay here.'

'La Push is smaller.'

'La Push is where I love'

'Because of Seth?' She said it. I knew she would.

'No' 'Yes'

'Whatever you say, Ania, But he is just a boy, in a few months he will get board of you'

I have never been so angry in my life. She knew nothing. I have known Seth since we were babies, He has been my best friend. when she didn't care, he did.

At this point we had pulled into the airport. after getting all my stuff I walked to the waiting area with my mom. we sat in silence. well, she tried to talk to me a few times, but I would not respond. 'Your the reason I got so bad' I kept thinking over, and over again. Until, finally, the plane number was called. we stood up at the same time, silently, and she walked me to the terminal.

'Well I'll see you on your next bre-'

'Your wrong, Seth wont just throw me away when he gets board. And before you say it, he wont walk away when I get bad again, he isn't you.' I looked her in the eyes, the anger flooding me again. But I am not my brother, I do not physically attack someone. 'He knows, about all the problems I have had. about how when I got to bad for you to handle, you shipped me off to dad's' by now, everyone is staring at us, sine my voice had risen quite a bit. ' he won't make it worse for me by leaving me, like you did.' I turned around, facing away from her, all the memories of how she emotionally hurt me as a child, how she would hurt Paul if he did something by accident. she was why he had anger problems. The tears begun to fill my eyes, as I stomped off. Finally when I got to the end of it, I looked back, she was still standing there, ' I will not be coming back here. ever.' I said, practically screaming. before I entered the plain, sitting next to the window.

I had finally gotten my case and was headed to the pick up area of the Airport. the thoughts of all the things that had happened racing inside my head. I could feel the dry tears on my face. 'Maybe I should go wash my face before I see Seth' I thought about 5 times before it was to late, I saw him, he took my breath away. He was beautiful. He was strong. He was kind.

He was mine.

He turned around and smiled at me, I ran into him arms and he spun me around, like in those old movies.

'Babe, were you crying?'

'Um.. kinda yeah'

'Why?'

'My mom and I got in a fight, that's all, I don't want to talk about it.'

'Alright. I missed you'

I smiled at him, 'I missed you, too' I could see people from the.. scene I had caused look at us. and whisper to whoever they were with. But I didn't are.

'Let's go home' He said Kissing me on the lips. I nodded.

The car ride home was quiet, we were just enjoying each others company. Seth had gotten his licence about a month ago. this consisted of me not having to walk to school. ever. the ride was about 2 hours long, and when we got to my house, he grabbed my suitcase. and brought it into the house. I was following me through the door when My step-mom came to the door, and hugged me. Dad was at work. I could already feel all the anxiety from Canada leaving my body, well whatever was left over even after I saw Seth.

'Welcome home, Ania' She smiled at me. Her stomach is out more now, filled with the new baby. 'You dad has been worried sick about you since you left.' She gave Seth a look.

'I'll bring this upstairs' he said pointing to the suitcase, then bringing it upstairs.

Mom looked at me, worry in her eyes. 'Your mom called an hour ago. she said you yelled at her. what happened?'

'she told me to come back and stay with her for my last year of high school, then she insulted Seth. and all the things she did when I was younger. I just broke. I told her I would never come back.'

'Those are strong words, for someone angry. sometimes you say something you don't mean. are you sure?'

'Positive'

'alright. if your sure.' she smiled at me, before walking away. Me doing the same, moving up to my room, where Seth was sitting on my bed.

'That's what happened? your mom and you? she wanted you to move back, and she said something rude about me? so you told her off.' he looked at me. slightly sad. 'It's my fault you said you wont go back, isn't it?'

'Seth, don't think that, it's something that has been happening before I moved her' I moved closer to him, sitting beside him. 'and I can't let her just say something rude about you. she needs to know that she can't try to bring me down like she used to. I won't let it happen. Not again. Seth, when I was younger, after my mom and dad got divorced, and we all moved to Canada. She would yell at me and Paul all the time. and for a long time, because Paul was older, he would take the blame for it all. but when he moved here. I was all she had, and she had gotten better, but it didn't change the fact that when I was a kid, she would make me cry. I would never have gotten this bad, if It wasn't for here.'

'and that's why Paul is so protective of you?'

'Yeah, and it's not you who make me tell her I'm not coming back. it was her, and it was me having enough of it.'

He smiled at me, and kissed the top of my head. 'I love you.'

'I love you too' I looked into his eyes, and remembered what he told me on the phone. 'what is it you wanted to tell me?'

He paused for a moment.

'Well, You remember the legends of our people?' he looked at me for clarification, I nodded at him. 'Well the one where it says we have Protectors in the tribe, that when ever the Cold ones are around, that they show up? well it's true. and I'm one of them.'

'Whoa. um... Seth, your kidding right?'

'No, and your brother is one, and so is all the guys. you know, Jake, Quill, Sam, all of them are as well.'

'Alright.'

' Your not scared?'

'You haven't hurt me, have you? if you haven't hurt me, then I have no reason to be scared.' He smiled down at me, The sadness, worry in his eyes minutes before completely gone.

'One more thing.'

'Alright'

'Their is this thing called an Imprint. And it's like she becomes your hole life. she is the reason your on the earth, not anything, or one else. she is the one thing you would protect with your hole being.'

I could feel my heart drop. 'It sounds like you have already found Yours'

'Yeah'

'Oh'

Seth grabbed my chin, and lifted it, so he could see my eyes.

'It's you'