Oisin never really had friends when he was younger, he and his mam lived in hostels before she met Dermot so he kinda just kept to himself and he thought that all kids were the same but sitting on a bench in the playground now watching Leah and Lucas play with children who were complete strangers only minutes ago made him realise that he was wrong, "Mate, you look weird just sitting here watching the kids" A man with blonde hair and a pram said to him as he sat down on the empty space beside Oisin, "I'm not I'm just here with my uh.. um.. brother and sister" Oisin said pointing towards Leah and Lucas, they could be his brother and sister, eventually right?, "Oh well I'm John Paul" he said holding out his hand for Oisin to shake "Oisin"

"You know I lived in Dublin a while ago"

"Wha- the accent kid jeez calm down"

"Accent right" They began talking and well that's how Brendan found them half an hour later

"Oisin, what are ya doing you were supposed to be back ages ago"

"Oh sorry must of lost track of the time"

"You! what are you doing talking to my son"

"Brendan, I didn't know he was your son"

"What kind of sicko tries to chat up a fourteen year old in a playground no less" Brendan exploded "I wasn't chatting him up!"

"Da! he wasn't we were just talking, promise"

"Fine, go tell Leah and Lucas that we're leaving" Brendan said still glaring at John Paul "I don't want you any where near my kid again got it"

"Daddy Brendan!" Leah shouted running over to him and jumping into his arms, Brendan shifted Leah onto his hip and started walking towards Oisin and Lucas who were hand in hand "Lets go"

Brendan and Oisin had left Ste' flat about twenty minutes ago and are now sitting on the the sofa, Brendan reading the newspaper and Oisin reading a book, "Why did you get so angry at the park" Oisin asked, he had been curious all night as to why he freaked out so much "He was just somebody I knew a while back and I thought he was giving you trouble"

"We were just talking"

"Yeah"

"No, I'm serious he's an adult that's just..." Oisin started shaking feeling a panic attack coming on as he was attacked by memories of Father John a man he had trusted, a man who had destroyed that trust and destroyed Oisin along with it, "Oisin! Oisin! c'mon what's wrong, breath for me that's it c'mon you're alright, it's okay, you're okay" Brendan was holding his shaking son trying to calm him down when Oisin began to sob, Brendan just held him.

"What was that?" Brendan asked after Oisin had calmed down, Oisin currently whipping his glasses looked up at him and then looked to the floor "I don't want to talk about"

"Oisin c'mon I'm worried just talk to me"

"Panic attack"

"Do you get them often"

"Only when I think about it"

"Think about what Oisin?"

"Father John"

"Who's he?" "A priest back home"

"What happened?"

"I was ten, my mam wanted me to be an alter boy, he used to take me into the back room behind the confessional. He told me I'd go to hell if I told anybody because it was supposed to be a secret between just the two of us, It went on for a year until he got bored with me and went after Darragh, he was about two years younger than me, he stopped going to church after a few weeks I wish I was aloud not go, Dermot used to kick the shit out of me if I didn't go said a little fag like me needed all the church I could get, he said it might just fix me" Oisin was crying now, tears streaming down his face as he looked up at Brendan and said "What you not going to tell me how fucked I am or how it was my fault!"

"No" Brendan said with his tears in his own eyes "Why not"

"Because it wasn't you fault, it wasn't believe me Oisin I know, it was not your fault"

"How could you possibly know"

"Happened to me aswell kid"

"Did you tell?"

"I never told anybody until last year"

"Who did it to you?"

"My father"

"I told my mam and Dermot, that's her husband, before I came here"

"What happened?"

"Said I must of asked for it, Dermot got really angry 'cause I was saying bad stuff about Father John so I waited until he fell asleep and I left, came here"

"He the one who did that to your face"

"Yeah, he started that after they got married"

"How long has he been beating you then?"

"Since I was eight, six years"

"And your mam she never stopped him?"

"Sometimes she liked to join in, she said I ruined her life, said you ruined her life"

"I'm sorry, I know that doesn't change anything but I am Oisin and if I had of known about you I would've been there or done something"

"I used to think about you when I was younger, made up stories about you, you were a superhero or a CIA agent but you know I think I'm pretty okay with this you"

"Well you know I'm pretty lucky to have a son like you"

"Really?"

"Yeah, I'm proud of you kid"

"Why would you be proud of me, I'm useless"

"You're brave" Oisin didn't even know what he was doing but before he could stop himself he was hugging Brendan, holding on to him like he was an anchor, the only thing tying Oisin to the Earth.

Brendan has never felt like a good father but tonight with Oisin he did good and he knows he did, talking to Oisin and letting Oisin talk about things Brendan truly did understand but it did hurt, he had always distanced himself from his boys to protect from having to go through what he did but yet Oisin never even knowing him still suffered just as much and that killed him having to know that Oisin felt his pain and his trauma and probably felt just as lost and broken as he did.

It's Friday now and Brendan has been called into the school again on account of Oisin's behaviour "Mr Brady, he has only been here a week and he has already skipped four classes"

"Oisin why are you mitching your classes"

"They're not important classes"

"Mr Brady, I expect Oisin to be in all of his lessons next week or I will have to punish him"

"He'll be there, won't you?"

"Fine whatever I'll go"

Oisin went straight to his room when he got home and refused to come out "Oisin c'mon open the door" Brendan knocked on the door again "I don't want to talk about it"

"Well we have to so open the door"

"Fine" Oisin opened the door and looked up at his father "Why didn't you go to your classes"

"I didn't want to"

"Why not"

"Just didn't"

"What classes were they?"

"PE and music"

"Why didn't you go to music, you're always playing around with that guitar"

"I don't know they'd just make a big deal about, that's what happened at my old school"

"PE why didn't you go to that"

"I didn't want to change infront of the other boys"

"Why not?"

"Because then they would see!"

"What the scars on your wrist they're hardly noticeable"

"Not just my wrist" Oisin let out a shaky breath taking off his jumper and turning around to show Brendan his back "Jesus kid, look I'll write you a note for PE but you're going to music now c'mon we'll get something to eat" Oisin likes that about Brendan that he doesn't make a big deal about it or force him to talk about, Oisin hates talking about it.

Please review and I just realised that there are like no line breaks on this so if it's bothering anybody just say and I'll put some in :)