Part 11. Pipe Dreaming

And now I'm trying to tell you
About my life
And my tongue is twisted
And more dead than alive
And my feelings
My feelings, they've been betrayed
And I was born a little damaged man
And look what they made

He said, don't you find
That it's lonely
The corridor
You walk there alone
And life is a game
You've tried
And life is a game
You're tired

from 'Velvet Morning', by The Verve

At the private hospital across town, Josiah and Nathan looked up as Ezra approached, looking decidedly pissed off for a man who reputedly rarely showed any emotion.

"Something happen, Brother?"

Ezra looked at Josiah, his jaw tight. "Mr Tanner has been cleared. Ms McBride's official statement has already been sent through to headquarters. In fact, it is probably already typed, printed and bound, given how long ago it was taken from the police."

Nathan stood up. "How the hell did that happen?"

"Apparently the Chief himself questioned the girl when he was here. We've been kept as mushrooms, my friends, and it was no mistake."

"I'll be damned. I knew the Chief was up to something before." Josiah was already getting his phone out. "What did the girl's report say?"

Ezra took the seat Nathan had vacated and crossed his ankles over a low-lying coffee table sitting between the chairs. "That she went with the men willingly and passed out drunk at the party after her friend went home. To her recollection, she has never laid eyes on Mr Tanner before… and she was never assaulted."

Nathan shook his head as Josiah connected to Chris. All of that worry for her family could have been so easily avoided, not to mention the punishment that Tanner had taken because of it.

"Furthermore, the forensics' report concluded the same thing. No sexual assault, not so much as a bruise marring her skin. Nothing except traces of MDMA in her blood with a large alcohol reading - a daring combination, to say the least."

Josiah got up and stretched his massive frame as he filled their captain in on the phone.

Nathan spoke softly to Ezra after a moment as Josiah talked. "How you feeling, Ezra?"

Ezra was a little surprised by the question. Sincere concern directed toward him still came as a shock. "I'm fine, thank you Mr Jackson."

Before Nathan could say anything else Josiah stepped back to them. "Chris wants us over at the hospital." He looked at Ezra as he got up. "Not you, he wants you to go home." Ezra scowled but Josiah just smiled, putting his arm over the Southerner's shoulders as he guided him down the corridor, Nathan beside them. "You really don't want to piss Chris off."

Ezra slanted Josiah a sideways look of defiance but said nothing. There was no point, these men seemed

determined to ignore his own ability to take care of himself.

..

Chris hung up his phone and turned back to Vin, who had been listening intently at the mention of his name.

"So now I'm cleared?" He asked again, smiling this time, trying to guess the other half of the conversation.

"The girl gave her statement to the Chief directly, before he came here to see you." Despite the words, Chris was scowling. "The son of a bitch had the doctors working for him, my men couldn't get near her. She went to that party of her own accord and she's never seen you before. There's no sign of abuse of any kind in the forensic reports."

Vin felt a tightness in his chest ease. Hearing the closure in Chris's words was a relief. Even though he'd known he was innocent, sometimes he knew that wasn't enough. Still, he wondered what part Sugar had played in her statement.

"I can't believe I got caught up in that," he said honestly, still trying to come to terms with everything that had

happened in the last twenty-four hours.

"Well if you hadn't, you wouldn't have had the pleasure of meeting Denvers finest member of the law enforcement."

Vin saw the jest in Chris's eyes and shook his head. "Lucky me."

Another silence fell and Chris waited, seeing that Vin was going to speak.

"Were you serious?" He finally asked, his voice carefully neutral.

Chris didn't have to ask about what. "Your file was on my desk before I met you."

Vin remembered the reference to a 'job opportunity' that Larabee had made outside the club. He hadn't known what to make of it then, and he'd had more important issues on his mind, like not bleeding to death.

"After you left last night, I spoke with Will Benning, he's head of ATF here in Denver, and my boss. He told me in no uncertain terms to pull you in off the street, but then he woke me first thing this morning with the call that you were here. We met with Orin Travis, he's the ATF Director."

Vin knew who Travis was. He'd heard many a tale about the former Judge. The man was a legend across the

country for getting the bad guys - and putting them away.

"He agreed to your transfer to my team, on the condition that you were cleared of the charges made against you. That's all I've been waiting on, I've been working on it all day."

Vin was shocked, both that Larabee would bother and that Travis would make such an agreement. "Why? Travis knows nothin' about me."

"You're wrong about that. He knows about the work you've done over these last years and he knows how deep you've gone on this case - that it would take years to get a new man inside, if we could manage it at all. He and Douglas Murphy –"

"Murphy…"

Chris looked at Vin's pensive expression. "You know him?"

But Vin shook his head. "No. Just know of him. He did a lot to stop the drugs movin' up through the border into Texas. Real headache fer the club down there over the years."

"Well he's the head of the DEA here now. He also sees the value of bringing you in, given your experience and knowledge of the club. He's a passionate man when it comes to wanting them brought down. He's the one who convinced me to take up this position, he and Benning together - and they're the ones who put your file on my desk."

"Glad my arrival was so secret," Vin said sarcastically.

Again a silence descended on the room. Chris couldn't tell from Vin's closed expression what he was thinking and retreated again to the window to give him some space.

Vin couldn't believe Larabee had made him the offer to join his ATF team in just a few days of knowing him. There was nothing binding him to Texas, except his other bike, some uncollected belongings and a rented apartment to sort out, but surely it couldn't be as simple as Larabee was suggesting? On the one hand, the man was dead right. Although he hadn't told him as much Lomely would never let him back on the case again, no matter what he said to try and convince him. The man had shied well away from the cause.

In fact, he'd be lucky if any department in Texas would take the club on again directly in the next twelve months, given the heat over the FBI mess that had gone down. Nobody wanted to blow the budget out with so little chance of a good result.

He'd worked with the DEA and the ATF many a time over the last years, but had not considered crossing

departments. He chose his questions carefully.

"Why're the ATF involved, ain't this the DEA's problem?"

Chris was happy the Texan had finally spoken. He could be patient when he wanted to be, but the contemplative silence had begun to wear him down. He didn't let his excitement show, but the fact that Tanner had not refused outright was a good start.

"We're one of several specialist teams being put together across the country to look into the rising club activities, amongst other things. We come under the direct branch of the ATF and report to Wilson, head of ATF, but we're a specialist division. We work on cases that cross over from other departments into the ATF's domain, starting with an investigation into the bikers, which means we work closely with Murphy and his department."

"So yer a new team?"

"Not even two months old."

Again Vin fell silent, taking in the facts before Chris pushed a little more.

"We need a man with a road in. With you on board, we'll be picking up years of undercover work and a wealth of knowledge... Not to mention I wanted a sharpshooter."

Vin looked up at that. It seemed Larabee knew everything about his skill set. He'd obviously done his reading.

"When this is over, there will be other cases to take on, but right now, as far as I know, no-one has ever gotten as far into the biker ranks as you have."

Vin gave a short laugh. "'There was Lucas Walsh."

Chris frowned at the name, it was not familiar. "Who's Lucas Walsh?"

"He was an undercover detective, spent two years in California with the local club there."

Chris picked up on the use of the word 'was' again. "What happened to him?"

Vin shrugged. "Hard ta say... there's a few diff'rent theories. One's that the club found out he'd infiltrated them an' rigged a bomb under his house, blew him ta hell."

When he didn't go on, Chris obliged. "And the other theories..?"

"...All have the same endin'." Vin smiled a smile that didn't reach his eyes.

Chris frowned. He got Vin's point. He knew how much risk this case was, to all of them, but in Tanner's position, he was walking a fine line. He needed to choose his allegiances very carefully.

"You thinking of downgrading your personal risk policy?" Did he want out? Chris hadn't thought he did, considering what he'd said so passionately the night before.

Vin laughed. "Hell no. No one'll insure me anyway. My only point was that the last time someone got this close, he got dusted, an' it was most likely by someone inside his own department."

Chris didn't need to know much about the man before him to understand he wasn't someone who trusted others to watch his back. His voice was clear as he offered the only assurance he could. "Aside from the men in authority that will need to approve this, like Travis, Lomely, Benning and Murphy, no-one outside of my team will know who you are… and you can trust my men." And me, his eyes said loud and clear.

"An' how well do you know yer men?"

"I picked them myself, carefully. They're good men."

Vin raised one brow again up at Chris. "You've only known me two days."

Chris grinned at that, it was a fair point. "I'm a good judge of character. You can trust me."

"I do," Vin surprised him by saying, and for a moment Chris saw that he was hesitating on his next words, was perhaps going to agree to the offer, but instead, frustratingly, he remained silent.

"But…" Chris prompted, "it's not enough," he finished for him. He backed away again, but pressed his argument. "No-one else is going to make you an offer to let you finish what you started in Texas."

"Is that what yer prepared to do, let me finish this? To do that, I've gotta get back out there soon as I can. They'll be expectin' ta break me outta here tomorrow."

Chris looked back, trying to see the extent of what `finish this' meant. "That depends… Why do you want them so badly?" he asked point blank.

Again Vin looked down, only briefly, but Chris caught it all the same and suddenly he was angry. "I'm offering you the only chance you're going to get here, and still you're not being level with me. All I'm asking from you is the reason why you're so bent on bringing these guys down. It's personal for you."

"It's just a case," Vin denied.

"You've got a stake in it."

"Sure I have, I'm puttin' myself on the line here."

"And I want to know why you'd do that."

Two stubborn, firm jaws locked, two intense sets of eyes gleamed at each other as the heightened words

died into yet another silence, broken finally by a soft drawl.

"What the hell would ya know 'bout what this is fer me?"

Chris didn't let up. "I know enough to see that in most cases, when a man's willing to put his life on the line, it's not for the love of his job. Something else is driving him."

"Men die fer their country all the time," Vin argued stubbornly and Chris shook his head.

"This isn't about king or country, this is about you – just you. I hope you're admitting that to yourself at least."

Vin's mind was working fast. He really had messed up in coming here unannounced – and there was no chance of picking things up in Texas, he could see that clearly now. Here he was, with all that he'd been searching for his entire life falling into place neatly around him, closer than he had ever been to his goals, and he couldn't find a willing answer that would satisfy the man who could help him get it all. He knew now that he could not leave Denver without getting what he wanted, and Larabee was offering him a legitimate way to do just that.

Chris saw Vin's chest relax, heard the long breath he let out and still he waited.

"I've only worked with the ATF on a few operations, I know nothin' 'bout their procedures an' trainin'."

He was close, Chris could feel him wavering, even as he acknowledged that he had dodged his question yet again.

"Neither did the rest of the team. We're all undergoing departmental training. There are courses we have to

undertake, but each of us has our own area of expertise. A few of us have military backgrounds; Nathan was a medic; Ezra was with the FBI; JD's a communication's nerd… you'll meet them all properly in time. They're good men," he reinforced, "men that will back you up without question. I made sure of that when I brought them together."

One last silence and Chris laid it on the line again. "So what's it going to be? I can get the paperwork sorted today, get you working the case again – officially," he stressed the last word. "But I need to know the truth - where does this end for you?"

When my father is dead.

Chris saw the flicker of emotion cross Vin's face and suddenly registered the pain he saw there. In the glittering depths there stood a plea. 'Don't make me answer that.' But he had to know. He shook his head in denial. "It's the only way it's going to happen, Vin. You can keep your secrets and walk away if you want to, but it's not going to get you back on this case."

"What if what ya hear makes ya take the offer back?"

Chris's gaze sharpened, but he reassured him. "You'd be surprised what I'd understand."

"Sometimes a man's motives're pretty selfish."

"Like revenge?" Chris asked.

Vin's eyes widened slightly. "Somethin' like that."

This time Chris did not retreat. Instead he pressed forward, again taking the chair and straddling it, leaning forward towards the torn man. "I know a little something about wanting revenge."

Vin tilted his head back, showing he wanted to know what that was and Chris's voice dropped a little in

remembrance. This was not easy for him, but he wanted Vin to know that he understood personal ambition – and the need for payback. He prepared himself to talk about something he had never spoken to a soul about.

"A little over a year ago, I was with the Marshall's Office in Chicago - had my own special op's group. Buck was with me.. I've known him most of my life. We joined after we left the army together. We were there for a few years," he paused and Vin tried unsuccessfully to read his expression. This was a bad tale, whatever it was had cut the man deep.

"We were escorting a prisoner out of state… when my wife and son were killed in a fire back home."

It took Vin a second to realise how heavy those words were, when Larabee hadn't put any more weight into them than he had any of the others. There was nothing in his face to give away their significance, no variation in his tone to indicate their import. He listened in silence, picking up more from what wasn't said rather than what was. He correctly sensed that this was not a tale he had often told.

"The investigation found nothing, they told me it was a terrible accident." He laughed then and Vin saw the deep anguish in his eyes for the first time. "A terrible accident," he repeated, then shook his head as if to stop himself from dwelling on the matter. When he spoke again his voice was firmer. "I wanted revenge, for a long time, but I had no target. It didn't stop me wanting it though… I still do."

"Is that when ya took on this job?" Vin asked, trying to put the time frames together.

Chris nodded, dodging the dark mood chasing him. "Wilson was my old army captain. He came and dragged my butt out here to Denver to take it on." Time to turn it back on Tanner. "My point is, I know when a man's chasing something… or running from something… and I know when something's driving him to not care whether he lives or dies."

Vin's eyes narrowed. It was back to him. He'd felt like he'd had a reprieve for a second, but realised now that

Larabee was merely reeling him in for the kill. "I already told ya, I ain't plannin' on dyin'."

Chris waited, hearing again the strong drawl emerge, betraying the dismissive words. "You're prepared to do whatever it takes, you said so yourself."

Vin shook his head, but his eyes did not convince Chris.

"What I want to know right now is where you're headed. I owe that much to my men." He wanted to know if he could trust him.

Vin sighed. He had to give him something. It was a catch 22. If he wanted to lay his past to rest and get the revenge he desired, he had to give some of it up. His words came swift and sudden.

"My mother was killed by bikers."

Chris was stunned into silence for a second. After endless minutes of drilling him, he'd just spat it out, no frills

attached.

"When?"

Vin shrugged, as if it no longer held any significance for him, but inside he was trying to quickly gather the right information, to coincide with the records Larabee had no doubt already read, yet still sound like he was giving something away. "When I's a kid, back in Texas."

Chris thought about that. That was a long time to harbour thoughts of revenge. Then he frowned. "I thought your parents died in a car crash."

Now he was going to lie, and for the first time in a long time, it didn't feel right. "It was the bikers' fault. They ran them off the road."

Chris listened and realised that although there was truth in the words, something still wasn't right in Vin's story. He had said his mother had died at first, nothing about his father, but he was talking and it was a start.

"What happened to you then?"

Vin spoke as if it was of little consequence. "State care, foster homes… When I's old enough I joined the marines, then the NTF."

It was a clinical life synopsis. So much to fill in. "And all that time you waited to get back at them?"

Vin sighed tiredly. "I guess so. Fer a long time I didn't know what I wanted." He looked at Chris, wanting him to understand. "If ya found out someone was responsible fer that fire that killed yer family, could put a face to their deaths - that it was lit deliberately even, would ya act on it?"

Chris didn't hesitate, his words violent and heartfelt. "I'd gut the motherfucker."

Vin nodded and after a moment Chris's eyes narrowed. "Are you saying you know who it was, exactly, that ran their car off the road?"

Vin was careful. "I have my suspicions. I think a few of `em might be here, in Denver."

So he wanted to be here, Chris thought, despite acting like he was being forced. Tanner really did have an agenda, and he certainly knew how to play his hand.

"And when you find these men?"

But Vin didn't need to answer that, for Chris had voiced the words for him just moments before. The words repeated silently in the room as they held a solemn gaze.

Chris studied the gaze directed at him, knowing that the words were true. He wasn't sure whether this could ever be over for Tanner, there was so much anger there, just waiting for the opportunity to be released. To most people, he would seem like a carefully controlled man, but Chris knew now the rage that lied beneath… and he knew that feeling well. The difference for him had been the men that had pulled him back from the darkness he had dwelled in for too long following his family's death. He owed them for that. He wasn't about to forget the importance of having good friends that were willing to step in whether you wanted them to or not - and he wasn't about to let Tanner ruin his life either, not over the lives of such unworthy men. Just why he cared so much he couldn't say, perhaps it was a way of paying someone back for the kindness, support and friendship shown to him during the most difficult time of his life.

"You join my team, you're a part of it. We work as one. That's the only way it can be, the seven of us, working

together with the same goal. No-one has a hidden agenda." He gave Vin a hard look. "That might not be the way you're used to working, but I won't accept anything less. So if there's anything else you want to tell me, now's your chance..."

Vin said nothing, but knew that Larabee was telling him if he accepted the position and was lying to him, there'd be consequences he wouldn't want to meet.

"... but on the up side," he continued, "seven men will prove a hell of a lot more powerful than one."

Vin realised he'd held his breath and let it out. For just a moment, he'd felt the lifted weight of a burden shared. Larabee knew what he was after, and he was offering to help him get it. He and his team were behind him, all he had to do was agree. Yet he hesitated, too many questions and thoughts still plaguing him, his mind trying to understand if Larabee was being completely level with him.

But then the ATF Captain was on his feet and his hand was heading towards him, palm open.

"So, have we got a deal?"

And as he looked from the proffered hand and back up to those steady green eyes, he saw that the hint of humour was back again. He also saw a man that was arrogantly confident he was about to get what he wanted… and he knew he could trust him. No matter what developed, Chris Larabee was going to be on his side.

A bandaged wrist raised up from the bed and just as Chris made to speak again, Vin shocked him by reaching his arm up further with a surprising show of strength and speed, to lock his firm grip around his forearm, forcing him to grip back.

"So long as ya know what yer bringin' on board," he queried one last time, giving Chris a chance to take it back.

But Chris knew. With Vin was coming a whole rap sheet of unwritten trouble, but he also knew what else he brought to the team. Not only was he highly skilled, he had courage and integrity – and the will to see things through. He might be a man dedicated to a cause, but for now it was his cause too. Later they could work on what came next but for now, he was the only man he would consider for his team. And as he gripped his arm in a firm show of closure, he felt nothing but a measure of satisfaction and a sense of completion. The search was over. He had the last member of his team.