Never Too Late
A/N Alrighty, so I had listened to this song, and I thought 'Why not add this to Tourniquet?' so here I am attempting to add this in with the story. If it's not good, just tell me... please! This song kinda fits, but not really. Sorta. I don't know. AND IM GONNA DO A CHAPTER TO THE SONG SNUFF BY SLIPKNOT SO BE PREPARED! XD So this one is a little shorter, but I'm okay with how it turned out.
Daelyn's POV
Not again. I couldn't be thinking these things again! It's been going on all week. I had been doing great, and then this shit just had to happen? These thoughts had come back with more force than ever. And it scared me now.
This world will never be what I expected,
And if I don't belong, who would've guessed it?
I finally had a life, I was with Santana, and he loved me. We were together, and I was finally happy.
I should have known it wouldn't last.
Santana. Should I tell him? No, I can handle this. Right? I worriedly looked up at Santana's face as he sat beside me, his arm wrapped around my waist lovingly. Tears pricked my eyes as I continued to stare at him, and I thought of what could happen. What if these thoughts, these feelings, got out of hand? What if I couldn't handle it, and I – NO! What if I tried again? ...
"Daelyn? What's wrong?" Santana asked, a look of concern in his eyes, as he looked away from the movie screen to look at me. We were at the movies together, on a date. And now I was ruining it.
"I'm sorry Santana." I whispered, a single tear falling, "I'm sorry, it's nothing." I didn't want to tell him. I didn't want to lose him.
I will not leave alone, everything that I own
To make you feel like it's not too late, it's never too late.
Santana's POV
"What? It can't just be nothing. You're crying." I whispered, gently grabbing her face to wipe her tears away. I kissed her, and I smiled into it as she kissed back.
"Santana. Tell me you love me. Tell me everything will be alright." She whispered desperately. I was shocked into silence for a moment, then I hugged her to me tightly.
"Daelyn, of course I love you. I promise it'll be alright." I whispered into her ear.
Even if I say it'll be alright, still I hear you say you want to end your life
Now and again we try to just stay alive,
Maybe we'll turn it around, cause it's not too late, it's never too late.
And then I could see it. In her eyes. I remember how they used to look when she had those thoughts. They looked like that now.
She wanted to end her life.
And then all emotion was gone from her face. She looked away, wiping her eyes, and then turned back to him. She smiled.
"Never mind Santana, I'm just being emotional."
No one will ever see, this side reflected,
Daelyn's POV
I couldn't tell him now. I had to act natural. I had to act like nothing was wrong.
And if there's something wrong, who would've guessed it?
A few week later and these thoughts still didn't stop. They got worse, the pain hurt. I couldn't take it! It was just as bad as last time. And Santana? He knew something was up. I tried acting normal, I tried to show him that nothing was wrong. But he didn't believe me.
So I started to ignore him. It hurt me, and I know it hurt him too, but I couldn't have him try to fix me. He would just be hurt even more in the end when I'm dead.
I stayed away from him, and he stopped trying to see me.
And now I would take my life.
And I have left alone everything that I own
To make you feel like it's not too late, it's never too late.
Santana's POV
She was ignoring me. She wouldn't talk to me, she wouldn't look at me, and soon she stopped coming over.
I figured I would give her some space, and then try to talk to her again.
I picked up my phone, quickly dialing her number. It started to ring.
It went to voicemail. I sighed.
"Daelyn, it's me Santana. I mean, I guess you already knew that, but anyway I wanted to tell you…" I paused, "I love you Daelyn. And I know something is wrong. I can help! I know I can. We can get through this together. I want to save you D, because if you die, I die," by now I was crying into the phone, "Please don't give up on me D. Don't give up. I love you." I whispered, and then hung up.
She called back. I nearly died from shock and relief.
"Daelyn! Thank god! I thought I would never speak to you again." I said sadly.
"Santana. I wanted to tell you that I love you." She whispered.
"I love you –" she cut me off.
"But I can't be with you. Because I am going to go through with this. I was never meant to live. I'm going to end my life." She said determinedly.
"Daelyn no! Please don't," I begged, "Please. If you come over right now we can talk about it, I can help you. It will be alright D. I know it will."
"You're wrong. It's too late." She whispered, and it sounded like she was crying, "Goodbye," she choked out, then hung up on me.
Even if I say it'll be all right, still I hear you say, you want to end your life.
Now and again we try to just stay alive,
Maybe we'll turn it around, cause it's not too late, it's never too late.
Daelyn's POV
This was it. This was the way I would go out. No drawn out death like drowning. It would be short. No suffering.
My hand shook as I held the gun up. I inspected it for a minute, the shiny barrel, the sturdy handle.
The trigger.
I admit I was scared. I've never held a gun before. But I didn't let that stop me. So I lifted the gun up to my head.
I wouldn't be a failure again.
I wouldn't be stopped again.
I would end my life.
I would change everything.
The world we knew won't come back
The time we've lost can't get back
The life we had won't be ours again.
Santana's POV
No. It couldn't be too late. I would talk some sense into her. I would get her to listen to me. I wouldn't let her do this to me again. It would kill me inside. I can't imagine a world without Daelyn. And I wouldn't let it happen either.
I tried calling her again. No answer.
So I ran.
It felt like déjà vu. I had felt like this before. I had been desperate, and scared, fearing someone else's life.
But I had saved her once, I could do it again. Right?
I had to try.
This world will never be what I expected, and if I don't belong…
Even if I say it'll be all right, still I hear you say you want to end your life,
Daelyn's POV
And he was here yet again. He was going to try.
Why? Why couldn't he just give up on me? Like I had given up on myself.
No. I wouldn't let him.
He wouldn't. Couldn't. Save me this time.
I was going to die, and god dammit no one was going to stop me, no matter how much I loved him.
Love had screwed up everything. It changed me.
I heard him knocking on the door to my apartment.
"Daelyn! Let me in. Please D, I love you." He cried out, making my heart clench painfully.
This is what I was talking about! Love hurts everyone.
"I can't." I said as loudly as I could.
"Daelyn, let me in! It's not too late to turn this around. We can stop this. Together."
But he was wrong.
"I love you." I whispered, even though he couldn't hear me.
Now and again we try to just stay alive,
Maybe we'll turn it around cause it's not too late, it's never too late
Maybe we'll turn it around cause it's not too late, it's never too late
Santana's POV
The door finally burst open under my weight. I rushed towards Daelyn, trying to push her arm down.
A shot rang out in the silence of the room.
And I watched as Daelyn's body fell to the ground.
I fell against the wall, sliding down. I burst into tears, holding my head, elbows on my knees.
I cried my heart out that day.
It never too late
The ambulance was on its way already, but I knew… it was over. I had been too late.
It's not too late, it's never too late.