Disclaimer: I do NOT own Shameless.

Chaper 3: Rage

Mickey POV

I don't know what I'm going to do but it has to be something. My mind just can't stop racing long enough for to think coherently as I pace back and forth in my living room. Trying to calm my shit down and force myself to sit on the empty couch. Yep Terry was gone and my room was turned over. I guess he didn't really believe that bitch rode the fag out of me and me being gone when he woke pissed him off. But I had to go. No wait I didn't. Why am I even trying to fix things again? Not sure when I started pacing again but I need a smoke so I force my self down again.

The burning smoke helps. I already feel calm well for a minute. Then Mandy barges in. I look away the moment I see the anger in her eyes. Shit Ian told her. Well I guess I did tell him to but I wasn't really in my right mind when I said it. "Where is he?" Her voice is cold. Is it for me or him? "Gone when I got back." She sighed and flopped down on the couch visibly relaxing.

"I get it Mickey. You lied to me and I'm angry but I understand because I know you and this is big for you. But right now there had to be complete trust from now on. On both parts..." She hesitates. I was prepared for her to be a bitch but I get another vibe off her. She looks scared when I finally look into her eyes. "I need you to tell me about Ian." I tense and look away. This isn't what I need right now. I get up to leave but I already now she isn't going to let it go. "I mean it Mickey because I need to be honest with you about something and I can't be until it is mutual. Trust Mickey we have always had that. Please. You're the only one I can lean on so why can't you lean on me."

I can't dispute anything she is saying but she wants to tell me something and I have to give her something I have never talked about with anybody. Secrets have always been easy but the truth?That is hard. I shut my mind out and the thoughts screaming at me to run from the emotions I hold. I feel my face being so obvious as the mask slides. "He came in my room with a crowbar to get his boyfriends gun back. The fight led to fucking and we had a good arrangement going for a while. But he is a little persistent fuck that wanted more so I ended it by telling him he was nothing but a warm mouth to me. I saw how hurt he was and I felt like shit. Even when I said it I was lying. When I got out juvie things changed."

"So you're in love with him?" Bam mask back. Laughing for a little dramatic effect. "Did I fucking say anything about that shit? No so don't assume shit. Just because I'm a fag doesn't mean I'm going to be some little bitch of a queen spreading out picnics and shit."

"Cut the shit Mickey you wouldn't do any of this if you didn't. I know you remember. He has gotten under that fat thick skin of yours and made you feel so go ahead and say whatever homophobic crap you want. But don't lie straight to my face. I saw the way you talked about him and that wasn't a lie." Fuck I made it worse. Whatever it's all kind of fucked at this point anyway. Terry has seen to that. "Fine! Ok fuck maybe I still havn't come to terms with my own shit yet. I know emotionally stunted and shit right. Isn't that what you used to say? And yeah Ian made me feel sit but to say the word? It's final and I can't take it back. I won't have an escape plan if I can't bring myself to.. you know escape!"

"You two can be happy. He just wants you and he knows exactly who you are and he loves you. How many people love like that? Not many so you need to"... " Yeah, yeah and what about dad? He isn't going to just forget this."

"Mickey I have to.. I NEED to tell you something.. about Dad. Your not going to like it. I.. You remember after mom died and dad became more violent you said that if he hurt me to let you know. To tell you if he ever hit me? Well he never did. But he would come home piss drunk and he would sit on my bed and tell me how much I looked like her. How much Mom showed in me and that he wanted to show me ho.. how special that made me." The sobbing overcame her before she could say the words and I was right by her side holding her up as she started to fall. My mind went into overdrive. He touched my little sister. He TOUCHED Mandy?! That fucking dick head was dead. Rage is all I have right now.

Ian POV

Fiona and Frank are arguing about parental rights. At least it's at the Alibi where there are booze around. Getting Kev to get shots for us all is my only concern. Hoping that getting Frank drunk might help in the persuasion. Shit Terry Milkovich is in the back of the bar. I turn around instantly just in case he saw me. Shit what am I supposed to do? I chance a glance back. His back is turned from everybody and he is wobbly. Drunk as shit and wants to be alone. Good maybe its my lucky day for once. Takeing my shots back to the table I think how all us Gallaghers in here at once was pretty strange. Its been a while since we were like this. Lip and Fiona are talking away from everybody so now is my chance. "Hey Fi? I uh.. um i'm sorry about earlier. I should have stayed to talk to you.."

Her face softens. "Its ok really but you know you can talk to me right? We shouldnt keep secrets." Damn the wounded card. "I-I know but sometimes we just kind of need space too. It's not about wanting to keep things from you it's about wanting to keep something to myself and sometimes talking about it doesn't help."

"Is this about a guy?" I hear Lip grunt and I give him a sharp look. "Wait you know what this is about? So that crap about needing space only applies to me now?"

"No it's just complicated ok and I can't talk about it. With either of you. And no I havent talked to Lip about anything that has been going on in my life right now because its my life and its stuff I need to sort out."

"Ok just one question.. are you still seeing Jimmy's dad?" I see Jimmy out of the corner of my eye listening intently. Its him that wants to know. "No I'm not. That as been over for a while now. And I'm sorry by the way." Looking over at Jimmy.. "I know it's messed up but I didn't know who he was and when I found out I just ignored it so I wouldn't have to think about it." He just nods and smiles, an understanding. Good I'm glad I cleared the air. I feel relief well for a second. I hear the door crash open and see Mickey walk in with something I have honestly never seen on his face. Yeah I have seen him mad, angry, pissed whatever its all the same but this was hostile. Everybody quiets down and soon all eyes are on him. I looks at his dad. He still hasn't moved. I see Mickey follow my line of vision. He is fast on his feet. The moment he reaches the bar he picks up a stool in one swift movement. Gaining momentum towards his target before he reaches up and crashes it down over the back of his dads head sending him crumpled to the floor.