Ain't that a kick in the head? 1.5

Journal

"Day 8"

"Melina has officially dubbed me to be, mildly, insane. She's calmed down and back to her usual self, but me plopping the Lands Between in the middle of the Pacific is indeed, insane. I wonder if I can teleport the Lands Between in a way that doesn't cause a Genesis Flood 2, Electric Boogaloo. Maybe if I learn gravity magic, and be stronger than Radahn, I could gently set the landmass into the water, or just move the water out of the way so I don't cause a massive tsunami. If Radahn could freeze the stars in place, I can plop the Lands Between in the Gods damned Pacific. How hard could it possibly be?"

"Day Nine"

"Killed a Bloody Finger today with the help of this Yura dude. Says he's a hunter, which I privately called bullshit due to the lack of a musket. Though the Finger part might separate the two. I dunno. I'm gonna head into this cave I found and hope there's any good loot. Which I highly doubt."

There's a doodle of Margit's shackle.

"Got this from good ol' Patches after kicking his shins in and 'forgiving' him. Note to self, avoid cliffs with shiny objects nearby from now on. If I forget, bitchslap Patches the next time I see him."

There's a doodle of a tree, with lines poorly emulating light coming from it.

"Found the Misty Woods. Now to find Blaidd. Just need to snap while holding my hand up high. Let's see how hard the fight with whoever needs to be fought in order to complete this quest."

Blaidd Pov…

I closed my eyes and took a deep breath of the misty air that permeates this small wood. I enjoy the chill it gives me as it goes through my nose and into my lungs. I open my eyes and let out a long sigh, watching as the air within me returns from whence it came. Once more my gaze scans across the wooded horizon, trying to find at least some sign of the traitor that was once near here. The soft clip-clop of hooves attracts my attention as my gaze goes downwards.

'Ah, this is the Tarnished that Lady Ranni told me about.'I thought idly as he approached the ruins I am on top of. He didn't look like much, quite young in fact. He hopped off the Spectral Steed, Torrent I believe it's name is, and approached the ruin with weariness present with his very steps. Quite smart for an apparent rookie.

I howled, letting him know of my presence, with any luck he'd head to Kalé and-

Snap!

My head snapped towards the Tarnished as his hand dropped to his side. Perhaps he might have already spoken to Kalé the last time I howled at the full moon. I jumped off the top of the ruin, landing with a soft thud as I landed in a kneeling position before standing straight up as the Tarnished went around the corner. He wisely kept his blade sheathed on his back as he waved to me.

I point my blade at him, despite his apparent friendliness, one can never be too careful. "Who goes there? Kalé sent you, didn't he?" A nod, "ever the bloody busybody. I apologize for the apparent hostility," I lean the greatsword upon my shoulder, "I am Blaidd. I'm currently looking for a man who calls himself 'Darriwil.'" The Tarnished nods yet again. "He's fled to somewhere nearby, or so I've heard. If you're able to find him before I do, let me know, and I'll give you an ample reward."

"Sure." Ah, he speaks! "I'll help out. I think I also might have stumbled over where he may have been a while ago actually."

"Truly?" I asked, curious.

"Yeah, here I'll show you." He goes into his rucksack and pulls out a map, pointing to a circular shape, "I found an Evergaol that looked recently used, considering the multiple footprints I found around it." The Tarnished shrugged.

I nodded, "I thank you, I assume you'll be heading there as well?"

"You assumed correctly." The Tarnished said in confidence as he put the map away. He holds out a hand, "And call me Ossa Regis, or Bones as my friends do."

I shook his hand, "Well met, Ossa Regis, I shall see you soon." He nodded and walked away, the telltale sound of Torrent being summoned alerted me to him finally leaving.

Later…

I approach the Evergaol, watching in amusement as Ossa stares in confusion at one of the Watchers. "Ah, I see you're curious about the Watchers." I rolled my shoulders as I prepared to explain. "Watchers do one of three things, wait in piles to explode, scooch around, or stand straight up with their eyes glowing purple. They originally were meant to protect the Evergaol's, but over time their magic imprints have faded, leaving them in their current state."

"That's… actually interesting." Ossa said, clearly more interested in the Watchers now, for whatever reason.

"You ready?" I asked him, his response was a firm nod and the unsheathing of his blade.

We walked towards the center of the Evergaol, and kneeled to press our palms into the sigil to pull us within. Then, everything went white. When we were finally able to see again, we were in the Evergaol. Near the edge of it, sat the traitor. "Darriwil…" I began, leveling my Greatsword at him while Ossa does the same. "Rotting in a cell is no true justice. No, this is where it ends for you."

Then, Darriwil lunged forwards at me, and I was all too happy to oblige as our blades clashed against one another, sparks flew as we pushed against each other, trying to make one lose focus so one can get a good hit in. Ossa dashed behind him, delivering a deep cut to the Bloodhound Knights calf. The traitor whipped around to attack Regis, but Regis was too quick as he rolled beneath the strike and delivered a savage slash on Darriwl's arm as I thrusted my blade for his spine.

The traitor blurred away from the strike, moving at a speed that likely would have made you think he teleported. Focusing on me now, he leapt into the air and swung his blade in a downward arc at me, my sword met his in a great clash of sparks. Ossa leapt forwards, delivering a heavy blow to Darriwl's back, causing him to buckle at the impact. Before I could land yet another strike, he blurred away once more.

Darriwil appeared behind Ossa, ready to split him in twain from above had Ossa not rolled to the side. As the Bloodhound's blade stabbed into the earth, I lunged and relieved him of his left arm. In a fit of blind rage, he began rapidly swinging his blade at me, I'm able to block some of his strikes, but not all of them. He raises his blade high for a final strike that is sure to end me-

Shing!

He abruptly stops, and goes frozen like a statue. Then suddenly, be drops like a puppet who's strings have been cut as blood sprayed from his, now separated, torso halves. I watched as Ossa fell to one knee as the Evergaol fades away, taking us back to the world outside. I could tell it was quite the taxing fight for him, which is both good and not good. There are plenty of stronger beings than Darriwil out there.

I hold out two Somber Smithing Stones towards Ossa Regis, "A deal's a deal. Here's your payment." He takes the stones and places them into his rucksack, "I have two suggestions for you. If you're willing to hear them of course." He nods, good. "First is to focus more on your endurance and strength when you're training or using runes on your maiden friend," he chokes as I continue, "anyone can be plenty strong and yet not have the endurance to prove said strength. Another is to visit a blacksmithing friend on the side of the road heading towards Caria manor. Tell him that Blaidd sent you." I began to walk away to report back to Mistress Ranni about the good news as Ossa says something to me.

"Thank you." He says to me, eyes filled with gratitude.

I smirked, "You're welcome, Bones." And with that, I dashed away.

Ain't that a kick in the head? 1.6

Journal

"Day Nine(cont.)"

"Met Blaidd today, he's actually pretty nice. Not sure if he was trying to be nice about the whole maiden thing or was making a joke/assuming me and Melina's relationship. I used the teleporting trapped chest to go to Caelid shortly after that. I wandered around on Torrent for an hour or two before fucking off. I was surprisingly able to ride my way back to Limgrave, but immediately got jumped by some chick that sounds like Junko Enoshima. Who's also a cannibal. Took me two deaths in order to beat her. Gonna take a rest and see what the next day brings."

"Day ten"

"I think the way I'm going to summarize what I've done so far today could go on a T-shirt. I invaded Fort Haight and all I got was this half medallion and a Ash of War that's called "Bloody Slash" or whatever. Well maybe not on a T-shirt but you get my drift. I wandered around Limgrave some more before deciding to go to an area in this region called 'The Weeping Peninsula.' I'm pretty sure I've been to most of what main Limgrave has to offer so I'm heading to the Weeping Peninsula next. I wonder why it's called that."

Irina POV…

All was silent, save for the distant sound of howling and flesh being cut from the bone of nearby soldiers. I shivered at the long silenced screams of the fellow soldiers I've escaped with. Thanks to the help of my Father, who stayed behind because of his duties.

They're all dead now. Each and every single person who's escaped with me, died. The servants, Misbegotten, came for them, and then killed them. I'd run, but I'm scared of making the inevitable come quicker than necessary. That and I'd rather not get a bolt to the throat by any guards because they mistook me for a Misbegotten from afar. Some women would take offense to that, but I don't. Their eyesight may be better than mine, but it's still pretty bad for them. So here I stay, waiting for my father, and my end.

Clip-clop, clip-clop!

The sound of horse hooves from the direction of the Bridge of Sacrifice attracts my attention. It's galloping at first, then slows into a trot, and then stops somewhere in front of me. I hear the rider get off their horse and approach me at a steady pace. "Hello? Who goes there?" I asked, my nervousness apparent to the unknown person.

"I am Ossa Regis, I'm-" a quick pause, "-a Tarnished," he admitted to my suprise, "here because I've heard that there's bad things happening at Castle Morne." Had my eyes not been covered, he likely would've seen my surprise at that, a Tarnished doing something other than looking for the Great Runes? "I wanted to check things out for myself when I came upon you." A ruffle of fabric and chainmail comes from himz "May I ask your name and take you somewhere else, mainly somewheresafe?"He asked me

Hiding my suprise at his kindness, I politely responded to his question, "My name is Irina, daughter of the commander of Godrick's forces at Castle Morne."

I heard his armour chunk and fabric move as he most likely did a short bow, "Well met miss Irina. I think we should get going now, I do not wish to see a kind lady such as yourself losing their life from some horrid creatures." Another shifting of metal and fabric, "Take my hand, I'll help you get up and onto my horse-" a huff comes from the aforementioned horse, "Torrent."

I all too gladly grasped his hand, he gently pulls me up to stand. "Before I forget-" I pull out my letter to father, "after you drop me off somewhere safe, could you take this to my father at Castle Morne? I know this sounds, dishonoring, but my sole wish is for him is to escape safe, even if his honor should pay the price." I strengthen my resolve and continue, "I have heard many a tale about Tarnished, and I don't care if helping me get somewhere safer allows you to get something that lets you fight Lord Godrick, but before you leave the castle, please gives this to him," I held out the letter towards him, my voice trembling, "Please… I just want him to be safe…" I said, holding back a sob.

There's a long pause, making me think I've made a mistake asking him, before he gently takes the letter from my hands. "I'll do it." He says softly, and I quickly break down into tears. I almost collapsed before he catches me.

"Thank you," I sobbed, "thank you." We stayed like that for a little bit, surely looking like a couple from one of those cheesy romance novels I used to read when I could actually see to read. I eventually calmed myself down and stepped back. "I'm ready when you are."

"I'll help you up into Torrent here." He stated, I felt my face heat up as he gently pulls me into a bridal carry and seats me on the back of his horse. He slips onto the saddle and stiffens as I wrap my arms tightly around his lower torso and buried my face into the crick of his neck to protect my face from the chilling winds.

I'm pleasantly surprised at the lack of a helm is I bury my face further into his neck. I heard many tales about how Tarnished are cold blooded and heartless monsters. Killing anyone for strength and taking what they want. But I have a feeling that this Tarnished isn't like the others.'He seems to be kind,'I thought to myself,'and most importantly'I sighed, causing him to stiffen further,'warm.'We ride away from the Bridge of Sacrifice, away from the Castle.

[COLOR=transparent] All while not hearing a, now distant, scream of flaming rage./COLOR]

Later, Edgar's POV…

I sat down on a bench, rubbing my head to be rid of this infernal headache that I have been practically cursed with since this whole mess started. I told those idiotic nobles that we didn't need any more Misbegotten as servants, that we were already strung tight enough because of the Leonine one as well as the sheer amount of them."What are those wretches going to do anyway?"They said"Start a revolt?"

And start a gods damned revolt they did. Now the treasure of Castle Morne is in the hands of the damned Leonine Misbegotten and most of the Nobles are dead while my men are either dead or dying, with the few living one's considering retreat. Don't they realize that it's not only their honor on the line, but also our own gods damned heads?! I sighed as I heard someone, or something climb up the ladder. If it's another damned soldier suggesting we leave I'll shove em off this damned tower, they'll be fine as it's not that long of a fall, and if it's a Misbegotten, I'll simply run it through with my Halberd.

The top of a head of blonde hair, with some streaks of white, comes.up from the top of the ladder. Followed by a pair of blue and gold colored eyes. I pay no attention to the armour the Tarnished most likely took from the corpses of other Godrick soldiers. He approached me, reaching into his rucksack, causing me to tense up briefly before relaxing as he pulls out a folded piece of paper.

"You've got a letter from your daughter," the Tarnished states as I read her letter, my heart breaking at her desperation, "She's somewhere safe at the moment-"

I quickly swung my my Halberd at him, snarling in rage as he blocks it with the Great Turtle Shell that he also most likely stole, I hold the letter from my daughter in a death grip, "If you killed her Tarnished I swear to-"

"Calm down!" The Tarnished snapped at me, "I know that most Tarnished are likely-" I hold back an angry snarl, "but I swear on my soul that your daughter is safe and sound. Hell, if you look on the ground below you can see the thing you lot were likely trying to get back!"

I glared at him for a long moment before lowering my halberd. He lowers his shield and steps to the side as I shoulder check him- "ow" -and looked down. Lo and behold, it was indeed the Grafted Greatsword, leaning against a wall. I sighed as I slumped, my halberds blade digging into the stone as I lowered it's head.

"You have not lied about getting the treasure of Morne Back, but that doesn't mean that you aren't lying about my daughter's safety." I level my halberd at him, "You will lead me to her, and if you leave my sight, I'll hunt you down. If she even has so much as a scratch, I'll hunt you down. If she's dead, I'll-"

"Hunt me down." He finished, nodding in acceptance.

I nod back, "good to see we understand each other." I sling my halberd onto my back, "Now, you'll be carrying the sword as you lead me to her." I hold back a smile as I go down the ladder from the groaning of the Tarnished.

Later…

It took me and the Tarnished five minutes to reach out destination. It was a smart one overall, a watched tower that is up high where no one can see you, or hear you unless you scream, where you can see someone coming. A watch tower with a suspicious lack of soldiers that I previously ordered to stand guard. I felt relief at the sight of my daughter. Her head snapped towards where we were as she calls out "Hello?"

I slide off my horse, "Irina." I said softly to her. She quickly gets up and runs towards my voice.

"Father!" She shouts in relief as I pulled her into a hug.

I check her all over, looking for any scrapes and bruises, "Are you alright? Are you hurt? Are-"

"I'm fine, mostly." She says sighing, "Everyone's dead, Father. Everyone that escaped with me was picked off by the Misbegotten. Had Ossa not found me…" The implications of that statement makes my blood run cold, but also fills me with confusion for a moment before it clicks.

Well, more like thuds as the Tarnished, Ossa, falls off the Spectral Steed with a groan.

I walked forwards, and held out a hand to help him up. He greatfully grabs the outstretched limb and pulls himself up. I give him a solid pat on the shoulder, causing him to stumble a bit. "I thank ye." I stated to him. "Had you left my daughter where she was, she most likely would have had her innocence sullied and her life taken."

Ossa regains his composure, and nods, "You're welcome."

"As thanks, I'll let you keep the Greatsword. You are it's owner now." I pull the hilt into his hand, it vanishes in a puff of sparks, at his confusion I elaborate, "the Grafted Greatsword does that whenever it's owner is not yet physically strong enough to wield it. It will reappear once you're strong enough to wield it."

He looks in my eyes, determination is present within them. "I'll be sure to that sir."

"But Father, your job-"

"Is now null and void I'm afraid." I admit to her, "the moment we both let the Tarnished- Ossa -help out and not immediately killed him already lables us as traitors. All we can do now his flee from Limgrave. Your grandfather had a home in Liurnia that we can go to, it's not much, but it's something." I look into the horizon at the now setting sun, "We need to leave at first light if we want to stand a chance of survival. We'll have to gather food and resources-"

"I'll help." Ossa calls out to us, smiling.

I nodded to him, "Let's get started."

Later… Bones POV…

I sighed, content with what I've done today as I look out onto the horizon. This is one of the very few quests I know of that I know has a definite sad ending. With Irina dying and Edgar going insane by the Frenzied Flame being the result. I gritted my teeth at the thought of it. More and more it gets hammered in that this is no longer a game. From Boc, to Irina and her father.

I took this moment to look at my hands, currently clean, yet even then the bloodstains are there. Hidden yet not hidden. I clenched my fist as a sudden anger comes over me.

"Ossa?"

I unclenched my fist as I turned around. "Ah, Irina. What are you doing up?" I said, giving her a pleasant smile.

"I'm here to tell you goodbye." She says stepping forwards, "I had a feeling that you were going to go at some point. And, well, I felt bad."

Now I'm confused, "about what?" I asked her, and she smiled slightly.

"You went through all that trouble to make sure I was kept safe and that Father made it back to me, only to get a sword you can't even use. So… I wanted to give you this." She got closer.

"Give me what-" my brain freezes as she gives me a necklace, made from glow stone and rainbow stones.

"That's for, well everything." She has a small blush on her face. "I'd make the request for you to become Elden Lord, but I get the distinct feeling that you're going to do that anyways. So I'll ask you only this. Please come visit us in our new home sometime. Bet it when you need a break from adventuring or if you, on the unlikely chance, stop aiming to become Elden Lord." She gives me a soft smile, "Please?"

I gently place the necklace around my neck, "I promise." I hopped onto Torrent's back, and road off into the night.

Unaware of the Orange Eyes watching them.

AN: The easiest chapter I've ever written. I went through multiple endings for this one, and went for the one that made the most sense. Up next, Caelid.

Ain't that a kick in the head? 1.7

Journal

"Day 12"

"Still reeling from what happened two days ago. With any luck they'll make it to Liurnia and to the Revenger's shack, likely going to be called something else, and live a long and happy life. I'll likely visit them sometime after getting through the Castle."

There's a doodle of Irina and her father.

"Spent the last two days trying to clear my head. I've explored what I believe is the majority of the Weeping Peninsula. Found one of those walking temple things and caused it to collapse. I checked out the inside and, well, there ain't nothing there except a petrified corpse. I wandered some more before deciding to Warp back to Caelid. With any luck I might find the merchant that has the Spiked Mittens. Found two map fragments so I now have what seems to be a, mostly, completed map of Caelid. Maybe I can find him on it. There's a little image of a house, so I'm gonna check that out. Other than that, I've tried and failed to figure out a way to get to the giant Jar that I seen in the distance."

There's a doodle of the Spiked Mittens.

"Note to self, avoid the T-Rex Dogs. Imma call em D-Rexes.

Bones Pov…

I galloped up to the, seemingly abandoned, shack on the hill facing towards the cliff side, wincing at the chill of the rain as it pelted me. The merchant must be pretty smart there indeed, not only are they far enough from the D-Rexes so that they won't find and nom on him, despite plenty of rams being around them, but close enough to them so that if anyone with ill intent knows where he is, they can somewhat protect him. He's also far enough away that you don't even see the light of his fire until you're close enough. There's also a Site of Grace inside the main shack judging from the golden whisps coming into the shack.

I slow Torrent into a trot before hopping off and letting him fade away. I catch a glimpse of his string instrument.

Knock knock knock.

"Hello?" I called out after knocking, walking into his line of sight.

He seems pleasantly surprised as begins talking. "Well hello there…" he rasped, "It's been an age since I've last seen a customer. How can I help you, here at the end of the earth?"

"I'd like to see your wares, if I could." I asked politely. He slowly nods and rolls out a sheet, neatly placed upon said sheet are a variety of items. Arrows, bolts, armor that looks like it's straight from Japan, but what really catches my eye are the mittens. I point at them, "How much?"

He raises a brow, "A brawler are we?" He says in mild amusement.

I shamelessly shrugged in response, "Hey, swords and spears are good and all, but sometimes you gotta give someone a good ol' wallop to get a point across." I said with a grin as the merchant chuckled.

"Together, they're about four thousand runes." He states holding out a hand.

I cringed internally, I just had enough to buy them luckily, but that means I'll have less than a hundred runes left. Thank god I kept some Golden Runes on hand.

"Alright, here you go." My hand hovers over his as a trickle of golden light coalesces into his hand, forming a large sized Golden Rune before he tucks it into his money sack.

"Alright, here you go." He hands me the Spiked Mittens and I neatly clip them to my hips.

"Thank you kindly sir." I said as I left the shack.

"Oi!" I stopped as he called out to me, "A word of caution dear stranger," I poke my head back inside, "there's a bloody massive dragon nearby that's currently sleeping. He's surrounded by multiple lesser dragons so do be careful if you're heading that way."

I nodded, "Thank you, I'll be sure to steer clear of that area." I said, lying through my teeth.

Here's what's going through my head right now, sleeping dragon means he's near something important. Attacking said dragon while sleeping can help me get said important things easier. Killing said dragon gives me access to a dragon heart and likely a shit load of runes. Shit load of runes means both buying things and also getting stronger. So in simple math terms.

Off sleeping dragon = Runes Heart Important Item. RHII= Easier time killing Margit.

So I went for the dragon. Sure, the quote is "Let sleeping dragons lie" butmyquote replaces the "lie" with "die." My face stretches out into a grin as I see it in the distance. I slowed Torrent into a trot before hopping off him once more and sneaked closer. I was able to slip by some dragons who were wandering around a bit farther from the giant white one with some luck, and crouched behind a rock when I got close enough.

I looked in awe at its massive size, obviously eclipsing the size of the one in Limgrave. It was surrounded by smaller dragons that also seemed to be sleeping. I could hear the massive one's massively deep and rumbling breaths as it slept. I felt it basically exhale on my face as it slept, causing me to freeze as it stiffened up.

'If I could feel it breathing from here…'I thought with growing horror,'that probably means it can also smell me.'

Its head slowly, and wobbly, lifted up from the gray colored ground. The rain and wind stopped and the world went completely silent as its maw opened wide. Less than a second later, I found myself needing to cover my ears as it let out a mighty roar that sent shockwaves from its mouth. The force of the roar shook the earth beneath me, causing me to lose my footing. My blood went cold as I saw all the other, smaller, dragons wake up. Their eyes glowed a furious red as they rapidly began roaming the area, trying to find the thing that caused the bigger one to roar.

I bolted when I heard the trees behind me start to topple over. I quickly summoned Torrent and ran around the dragons, and just as they whipped around to give chase, I dropped into a spirit well and sighed in relief. I could still hear them rustling, searching for me. I unsummoned Torrent and pressed my back into a small crevasse on the cliff side.

I felt my stomach drop as a dragon slammed into the earth a few meters in front of me. It snarled and hissed as it looked ahead of itself, completely missing me. My heart pounded as it whipped its head to the left, and to the right. Hoping that it wasn't smart enough to lookbehind it.Then, as quickly as it came, it gave an annoyed hiss and flew off, I watched it circle back to the giant dragon and vanish from my sight.

Needless to say, I stayed there for quite a few hours. It was night when everything calmed down. I summoned Torrent, and jumped up the spirit well, my heart dropping as we said up high, past the dragon before dropping once more. Torrent jumped in the spirit well again, I frantically looked for anything I can use to get to safety, before spotting a Site of Grace by nearby fort.. Once Torrent landed, he jumped once more, and then again at the height of the first jump, sailing over the head of the massive dragon.

I galloped past multiple sleeping dragons and towards the Site of Grace. I activated it just as the Dragon roared, causing Torrent to fade once more and causing me to fall to my knees, raising both fists in the air in silent celebration as Melina appeared across from me. She took out her knife in its sheath and whacked me on the head with it.

"Ow!" I whisper shouted, rubbing the sore spot on my head, "Yeah I deserve that." I admitted after a moment.

"That was stupid. Your entire plan is also most likely stupid." She whispered harshly, "Who in their right mind thinks it's smart to go after a sleeping dragon?!" She throws her hands in the air in exasperation, "At this point I'll be more worried about my mental health than heading to the foot of the Erdtree."

"Well…" I said slowly, "If I'm gonna be able to get you to said Erdtree, I'm in need of runes, and of Great Runes, which one I can get from Godrick." I point to the sleeping dragon, "If I can kill that, then I can have a greater chance of completing both of our goals."

She crossed her arms. "There has to be better ways than this, I know you aren't as insane as you acted a few days ago. I'm also well aware that you're doing it to actually help than Lands Between. But please, for the love of everything bones,thinkbefore you do something like," she gestures to the sleeping dragon, "this. I know you want to help our situation, but please do so in a way that won't compromise our shared goals and your mental well-being." She shakes her head, "too many do stupid things for the right reasons. So please," she places a hand on my cheek, "think about yourself before you do insane shit like this."

I turn my eyes away, my face blushing heavily as she holds my face with a singular hand. "Okay." I said, closing my eyes and exhaling, "if that is what you truly think is best," I look her in the eye, "I'll do better."

Her hand drops and a thankful smile comes across her face,"Thank you."She says, sighing in relief, "you're too good of a person to lose you know."

I blush again, "thanks." I said truthfully.

"So, what's your plan now?" I look at her in confusion, "we're already behind the dragon, so what are you going to do?"

"Ah! Right!" I stand up and roll my shoulders, "the Spiked Mittens, or their actual name Spiked Caestus, has a very slow, but effective ability that allows me to cause whoever I'm fighting to eventually suffer heavy blood loss."

"So you're going to punch it to death."

"I'm going to punch it to death, yes."

Melina sighed and pinched the bridge of her nose, "If this works I'm going to either cry or kiss you."

"Does it help that I have a crush on you?" I slapped my hands over my mouth as the words spilled out on their own.

"I knew that. You aren't exactly subtle about it. You say my name in your sleep sometimes."

There's a long moment of silence between us as my face turns red. "I'm gonna punch the dragon now."

"Smart idea." She says as she makes herself comfortable on the ground.

I sighed in a mix of embarrassment, shame, and exasperation at my life as of late before walking up to the dragon. "Alright you massive lazy lug," I say to the back of it, slipping on the Spiked Mittens, "let's see how many hits it takes to get you to drop."

I promptly began swinging.

"MUDA MUDA MUDA MUDA MUDA MUDA-"

Severalminutes later…

"-MUDA MUDA MUDA MUDA MUDA MUDA!" I prepare the final swing, "MUDAAAAAA!" My fist connects one last time against the flesh of the massive beast. My arms feel like they're about to pop out of their sockets and I'm pretty sure I pulled a muscle. I sigh and turned my blood covered form around.

"Well…" Melina said with uncertainty, "you certainly tried-"

With a great roar, the dragon explodes, a spray of blood coming from it's wound I made on it's back the shockwave of it's death makes me fall over as it died. It fades a way in a swirl of ash and mist as the dragons nearby decide it's a great time to fly away. I look up into the sky as the dragons flee and smiled.

I look at Melina, her mouth opens and closes like that of a fishes before finally closing. "I got… absolutely nothing."

"Not even a kiss?" I teased, and then promptly fell on my ass.

"After you bathe." Melina replied tiredly, walking over and pulling me to the Site of Grace, as it reinvigorates me I rolled my shoulders.

"Alright. Let's turn these runes into strength shall we?" I said, holding out a hand towards Melina.

"If that's what you wish Bones." She sighs, "hopefully this will be enough for you." She states tiredly as she grasped my hand.

AN: betcha didn't didn't think I'd update this again. You thought wrong!

Not sure how I feel about the pacing, is it too quick? I think I made Melina feel a bit too OOC. I dunno. Next chapter will feature Bones forgetting to go to the dragon communion thing, fighting the Tree Sentinel, and fighting Margit with the Lone Wolves.