Chapter Nine: Change in the Weather

Bella POV

"You about ready?" I heard Emmett ask at the door of my parents house. It was the day of Mr. and Mrs. Whitlock's funeral, and I didn't think I'd ever be ready.

"No." I cried as he came up and hugged me from behind. Jasper's parents were my parents for my entire life. It was unreal that this was the second funeral I'd be attending where the people who died, had been murdered. "How could someone do this? They were the sweetest people ever. I love my parents...but my mother was like a friend to me and my father worked a lot. Jasper's parents were the...real deal."

"I'm so sorry this happened to you." He cried as I hugged him tighter. "I can't imagine what this feels like for you. I lost my parents...but that was all an accident."

"It's Edward all over again." I admitted. "I can't breathe and I feel sick all the time and I...I feel my body."

"Shhhh." He whispered. "It's going to be okay."

"How?" I sobbed. "How is any of this going to be okay? Rosalie just got to know her...her and Jasper were best friends growing up...little Melody is never going to know her now. Nothing about this is ever going to be okay."

"Hey, did you say that when Edward died?" He whispered, sitting me down on my bed. I only nodded before putting my head onto his shoulder. "So, it took some time but things are turning up, aren't they?"

"I guess."

"Bella, you don't even know how far you've really come." He whispered. "When I met you, you were this shy, sad girl all the time. You've come out of your shell."

"I wouldn't be so sure about that."

"I am." He protested. "I'm sure that you've overcome the most difficult obsitical this life is going to give you. You're stronger now, Bella."

"Hey, guys?" Alice asked from the doorway. "We're about ready to go." We sat there for another few seconds before getting up and going down to the car. Rosalie was a wreck. She'd just gotten to know her mother. Her birth mother. And someone had taken that away too. Jasper was even worse. He hadn't gotten out of bed for a week, not even to discuss the funereal. He'd given my mother and I that particular job, and I had no clue what I was doing. I had't even planned Edwards.

"How're you doing?" I asked as I sat in the backseat with him.

"I...I don't know." He whispered, letting a tear fall. I scooted closer to him, and just placed my head on his shoulder, knowing that nothing needed to be said. It didn't take long to arrive at the funeral and Emmett literally had to pull him out of the car.

It was a long day. A lot of people coming in, telling us how sorry they were about Mr. and Mrs. Whitlock. Jasper was in and out of the room, going between the bathroom and here with Rosalie. He hadn't been able to stop throwing up and couldn't hold any food down. Carlisle continued to tell us to be patient with him and the shock would eventually wear off and he'd be fine.

"How are you holding up?" Emmett asked as he came and sat next to me on the front steps, handing me a milkshake. "I drank a lot of these when I lost my folks."

"Thanks." I whispered, taking it from him and taking a sip. "I don't think it's sunk in yet."

"Oh? Why?"

"Because, I don't want it to." I admitted. "If all of this sinks in, then they really are gone. Everything Rosalie did to get to know her was a waste. The things she gave up so she could focus on Jasper. What good was all that for?"

"The good of knowing she was a great mother." He whispered. "I didn't meet her, but seeing Jasper like this shows me she was the mother. The mother that'd do anything and the mother who you blew friends off for just to play a board game."

"We did have a lot of those nights." I remembered. "Just Jasper, Anna, and I. We'd sit down and play Pictionary and LIFE."

"It's the hardest thing." He said. "Losing a parent. You feel this...anger towards them. All you want to do is yell at them for leaving. Break stuff. But then, you feel completely guilty for wanting to be angry at them because it wasn't their fault. They didn't set the fire...or pull the trigger. Sometimes, it's just the dryer setting a dryer sheet on fire. Or scum bag who...wants revenge.

"But then, it's complete sadness as well. You feel this weight on your shoulders...crushing you. Consuming you. You don't know what to do with it. You want to get over it...you want to be able to lift the weight off you shoulder. But, then you feel if you do...you'll never remember them the same way you did. The boulder on my shoulders still hasn't gone away. And it's been eight years since my parents died in the fire."

"So, what it Jasper going to do?" I cried. "He has Melody and Alice...I don't want him slipping into this terrible funk."

"He won't."

"How do you know?"

"Because he has so many people that care about him."

"You did." I pointed out. "You had Rosalie and her family. You had Carlisle and Esme."

"I didn't want their help." He told me. "I pushed and pushed and the only reason they didn't continue to try was because I ran. I ran from the problems I was faced with, Bella. Jasper won't do that."

"How can you be so sure?"

"He's too responsible." He stated. "I was eighteen, Bella. I didn't have a daughter to take care of, I'd just graduated high school. I was in the perfect place to just run. Jasper would never leave Alice, let alone both Alice and Melody."

"You should talk to him."

"I've tried, Bells." He sighed. "He doesn't want to hear anything right now. When people go through this...it's best to just wait and let them come to you. Carlisle and Esme never pushed me to come stay with me, and I felt more at home when I eventually came to Forks."

The day continued to drag on, and we were all thankful when we could go back to my parents house to relax and try to rid our minds of the horrible day. Jasper locked himself in the guest bedroom with Alice and Emmett and I snuggled close to each other on the couch, just listening to the crackle of the fire.

"Why did you decide to run?" I asked as we were both falling asleep. "Why not just...accept the help being offered."

"I was one of the most stubborn kids you'd ever meet, Bella." He sighed. "Hell, I still am. I just...didn't want the help and I let it get the best of me. I got into a bad crowd after leaving."

"How bad?" I asked, sitting up.

"Bad." He whispered. "A gang."

"You were...involved with a gang?"

"Yeah. And, for a while nothing bad happened...I'd help them mug someone to get the money for the food I needed but nothing too bad. No killings."

"That's still not okay, Em." I snapped.

"I know." He whispered. "But I was desperate and stupid."

"What about Carlisle and Esme?"

"I didn't want their help yet!" He told me. "I hadn't hit rock bottom and that's why I went to them in the first place."

"So, how are you here?" I asked, crossing my arms. "Gangs don't normally just let you leave."

"I began getting fed up with their lifestyle. And they got annoyed with me and told me to leave. So I did." He said, taking a deep breath. "And, now they want me back and to get me back...they're killing people."

"What people?" I asked through clenched teeth. "What people, Emmett?"

"Rosalie's family." He cried. "Jasper's mom and step-dad."

"Oh my god." I cried. "You're the reason they were killed?"

"He threatened me. A while ago. When Aiden was a still a baby."

"Two years?" I asked, not wanting to comprehend what he was saying. "You knew he killed the Hales? You knew he'd continue to kill until he got you back?"

"Yes." He sighed. "But, I didn't know he'd kill Jasper's parents...I never met them."

"You know Jasper and he knew this somehow. He somehow found out Rosalie and Jasper were twins."

"I never wanted this, Bella." He sighed, sitting down again. "But, either I go and get killed. Or the people around me get killed."

"I...I need air." I whispered, grabbing a blanket and going outside. I slumped down on the porch step, crying. I was crying for all the lives lost because Emmett got caught up in the wrong crowd. I cried for Jasper whose life was just completely changed. I cried for Rosalie who had just gotten to know her mother, and now had no one. I cried for Melody who'd never remember her grandparents.

"I could go to him." I heard Emmett's voice. "I could go and surrender...and be killed."

"Well, that doesn't solve a problem, Emmett."

"How? No one you love would run the risk of being killed."

"Yeah, no one but you." I sighed. "You do that and no one looses anyone else...but we lose that. That isn't a solution...that's a crime, Emmett."

"So, what?" He asked, sitting next to me. "We just wait for him to kill more?"

"No, we find a way to beat him."

Emmett and I fell asleep in each other's arms that night, and groaned at the sound of the alarm clock. Today was the day of their funeral and I was shaking as I got ready that morning. This was as painful as losing my parents would be. But, I had to be strong for Jasper. I couldn't fall apart now.

"It's going to be fine." Emmett whispered in my ear, taking the brush out of my hair and began brushing it for me. "He won't show up. James plays dirty."

"They were parents to me." I cried. "When I got mad at my parents, it was okay because I had them right next door. I could run and crash at their house in 'my' bedroom."

"You had your own room?" He laughed.

"No, it was the guest room but I was their often enough and had stuff in there all the time...it might have well has been." I smiled. "I've been keeping it together for Jasper...but I don't know how much longer I can pretend."

"Don't pretend." He told me. "Just, let it happen. Be there for Jasper, but be there for yourself as well. He'll understand if you can't keep it together."

"Of course he'll understand...he's Jasper."

"Exactly." He whispered. We all piled into the rental car and made our way to the funeral home. Jasper had managed to pull it together somewhat, and he didn't look like he was going to throw up. After waiting inside for people to say one last goodbye, Emmett and I headed outside for some fresh air. We sat down on the front steps together, holding hands and my head on his shoulder, silently sobbing.

"Well, that didn't take long." I heard a familiar voice seethe as they walked up. I looked up to see Elizabeth and the rest of Edward's family coming in. "Glad to see you've found a replacement."

"Elizabeth." Nathan warned. "Let's not cause a scene."

"You're telling me you're okay with this?"

"Mom, it's been two and a half years." Annie whispered. "She's allowed to be happy again."

"Well, I'm glad you've found someone to play house with." She sneered. She stomped inside and the rest followed, giving me apologetic looks for her actions.

"She...seems fun." Emmett gulped as he stood up, and gave me his hand to help me up.

"She really is a nice woman." I sighed. "But, Edward was her baby. It's still hard for her."

"You don't need to defend her, Bella." He whispered. "I could understand it's hard for her, but it's been two years and you aren't a tramp like she's making you out to be."

"I'm not?" I asked, my eyes beginning to burn with tears. "Because, I have a son to raise...and I'm off with you."

"Bella, we aren't on some vacation together." He told me, wrapping his arms around my shoulder. "Hell, we haven't even made it to second base." He laughed, causing even me to laugh. "The other girl was right...you're allowed to be happy."

"That was Annie." I smiled. "His older sister."

"Well, if her older sister thinks it's okay, then so do I."

"Guys, the service is about to begin." Alice told us as she stuck her head out of the door. We both took a deep breath and stood up, walking back inside.

"Our Father, who art in heaven, hallowed be thy name. Thy Kingdom come, thy will be done, on earth as it is in heaven Give us this day our daily bread. And forgive us our trespasses, as we forgive those who trespass against us. And lead us not into temptation, but deliver us from evil. For thine is the kingdom, the power and the glory. for ever and ever. Amen" And so it began.

The service seemed long. It seemed to drag on forever. Jasper gave the eulogy, but he stopped in tears halfway through and Alice finished for him. It seemed every time my eyes would dry, something would be said and I'd begin to cry again. But, Emmett sat next to me and held my hand tightly and let me cry for the ones I'd lost.

It was dark by the time the wake was over and everyone had left, leaving just the five of us and my parents. My father promised Jasper he'd take care of everything and Jasper could just stay home and be with Melody. He thanked him graciously and called Carlisle telling him we'd be home soon. My parents went upstairs early, the long day had wiped them out.

Emmett and I retired to my old bedroom and sank down into the bed together. I had my head resting on his chest as he lightly stroked my back. As the pattern continued, I realized I hadn't been this close to someone since Edward and I began feeling guilty. I was supposed to marry him and I felt almost as if I were cheating on him.

"What's wrong?" He whispered as I sat up. "Bella, talk to me."

"I feel like I'm cheating." I told him, standing up and pulling my hair up.

"On Edward?"

"Yes." I whispered."I was engaged, Emmett. I feel like I'm not being faithful by being with you."

"Look, Bella." He sighed, scooting towards the edge of the bed. "I'll take you. Anyway I can have you. If we never even get to second base...that's okay. I just...I just want a place in your life."

"I have a son."

"I know."

"I can't let him get hurt." I whispered. "Soon, he's going to be asking where his father is and I'm going to have to explain his father died before he was born. He'll get attached quickly to anyone."

"I know."

"He never even got to see him." I cried. "Edward. He only saw Aiden on the sonogram and we didn't know we were having a boy. We wanted to be surprised."

"He sees him everyday, Bella." Emmett told me gently. "He's looking down on both of you. Smiling."

"Smiling?"

"You're happy, Bella." He told me. "You may have been through a terrible two years, but you're finally happy. You're happy in Forks. With Jasper and Alice. Teaching at the school. You smile a lot more than when I first met you."

"I do?"

"Yes." He nodded, smiling himself. "When I met you...it was like you were...trying not to be happy. Resisting smiling almost. Like...you were afraid if you smiled...you'd be disgracing Edward's memory."

"You...came up with that?" I laughed, since that was what Esme had told me.

"Okay, so I one of your conversations with Esme." He admitted. "I wasn't listening...but I was walking past and she isn't exactly...quiet."

"No...she really isn't." I laughed with him. "I don't know if I can, Emmett."

"Why?"

"Because I wasn't much of a dater or a kind of girl guys wanted to date in high school and the only reason Edward and I met was because one of my students was his cousin."

"You may have met because of that cousin, but you turned that into a relationship."

"After a lot of talking into." I sighed. "It wasn't this instant thing people see in the movies. I was really afraid of getting hurt and he told me for days he wasn't going to hurt me, but he wanted to be with me...and only me."

"As I said, I'll take you anyway I can have you." He whispered, grabbing my hand and pulling me down beside him. "Let's take this slow. Real slow."

"I think we've got the hang of that." I giggled as we laid back down together.

"Let me take you on a date." He said. "Please. Just the two of us."

"Yeah." I finally whispered. "I'd like that."

The five of us stayed in Chicago for a few more days, but it was to the point where the kids had overstayed their welcome at the Cullen's and we had to get home to them. Jasper had perked up a bit in the days following their burial and was actually able to eat dinner last night and keep it down.

"Home sweet home." I heard Alice whisper as we drove past the Welcome to Forks sign. We pulled into Carlisle and Esme's driveway and I saw Aiden waiting anxiously by the window, standing up on the couch. I saw him mouth 'Mama' and grew giddy with excitement. This past week and a half was the longest I'd ever been away from him.

We got out of the car and both Alice and I raced up to the door, which Esme already had open. Both of them were waiting in the small foyer and jumped into our arms after we bent down to their level. I didn't let Aiden go until I was putting him in his car seat to go back to our house.

"I missed you, kiddo." I whispered as I gave him a bath that night. "Very much."

"I missed you," He began to say, and then threw his arms open as wide as he could. "This much!"

"That's a lot!"

"I know!" He laughed as I pulled him out of the tub and wrapped him in a towel. I got him dressed, read him a story, and sang him his favorite song.

'So darling, darling
Stand by me, oh stand by me
Oh stand, stand by me
Stand by me'

"I love you, mommy." He whispered as he fell asleep.

"I love you, Aiden." I whispered, kissing him on the forehead, and leaving his room after turning on the night light. I took a deep breath and absorbed the comfort of being in my own home, and took in the sweet silence as my two year old slept in the other room. I grabbed a book from my room and plopped down on the couch just as my phone rang.

"Hey." I said softly, not wanting to wake Aiden. "I just put Aiden down."

"Well, then I'll make it quick." He laughed, knowing it was the only peaceful time of day I got. "I was thinking Saturday night. You and me. Port Angeles. Anywhere you'd like."

"Anywhere I'd like?"

"Yes."

"Well, I'm not picky." I laughed. "You pick and I'll go. I just want some alone time with you."

"Then alone time you shall receive." He whispered, and I began to actually miss him, even though we'd only been apart for a few hours.

I knew that I'd always love Edward. He was the first real love I had and he was Aiden's father. No one could take that love away. But, I knew that Emmett was going to be the one to help me love again.