Chapter 4
Candy remained stunned, without even blinking. Maybe she had died ipso facto and had just reached the heaven itself. Undoubtedly those eyes resembled the sky, but by the way they were looking at her, she knew a hurricane was coming.
She didn't want to move; she felt very comfortable and safe in those strong arms that held her firmly. Now she was only worried about the unleashing of that storm hovering in those blue eyes.
She suddenly felt Albert holding her against his chest, calming the shock both of them had experienced. He held her like that for a moment. That feeling of security made the butterflies in her stomach wake up again and flap uncontrollably. She stirred a little trying to appease them.
Albert loosened his embrace slowly and put her gently on the ground. He was not sure yet if she was all right.
When Candy felt upright, she realized that she had been practically like a baby in his arms. A very unconventional position, by the way. She wished Great Aunt Elroy was not spying on them; she would lock her up in a convent for sure.
Candy's legs trembled slightly when she felt the firm ground beneath her feet. Even her heart couldn't stabilize at all. Instinctively she looked for Albert's arms to hold on to.
"Are you all right?" asked Albert, still shocked, trying to keep her in balance.
"Yes...I think so." Her voice sounded strange. "Thank you..." she murmured, attempting to look calm.
Several seconds passed until she was able to stand on her own. When she finally managed it, she moved a little further away from him.
"What were you supposed to be doing, Candy?" Albert's blue eyes pierced her while his voice struggled to contain his indignation.
He had been hanging around the garden, when he heard the trees moving in an unusual way. It wasn't the wind. He looked more fixedly and verified that it wasn't an animal either, but the blonde girl because of whom he couldn't sleep.
He approached cautiously, hoping to surprise her when she reached the ground, but instead of surprising her, as he expected, he was surprised himself when he saw her falling. It was fortunate he had been so close; if he had been a step further back she would have been fully stamped on the ground.
Candy didn't know what to answer. She wasn't going to tell him that
she was trying to run away, so she said the first thing that came to her
mind.
"I...I couldn't sleep and I wanted to take a walk in the garden." She wasn't good at lying, and especially to Albert, but now she didn't have any other choice.
Albert looked at her from head to toe. He didn't believe a single word of what she had said.
"You couldn't sleep and decided to dress and put a coat on, and all that just to take a walk?" he asked ironically, raising his eyebrows.
Candy looked down at her clothes; actually she looked like she was going on a trip.
"Well...yes. Sometimes night is a little cold."
She noticed that Albert was wearing a white shirt and a pair of baggy pants. She had never seen him so informally dressed. She had to admit that this informality suited him very well. Several images from the time they had shared in the apartment came to her mind. She felt a twinge of homesickness in her heart. If she left, she would share nothing more with him.
Albert turned his eyes to the suitcase that lay a couple of meters away from the tree.
"You went out for a walk?" he asked again, waiting for her to retract her lie and tell him the truth.
"Yes," she replied firmly.
"With a suitcase?" He focused his eyes on the suitcase, raising his eyebrows.
Candy had completely forgotten the suitcase, and she swallowed with difficulty when she remembered it. She looked at both sides looking for some evidence. She didn't find anything that would give her away, so she followed Albert's gaze. There, a couple of meters behind her, lay her suitcase. She wished she could disappear.
"Well...I..." She didn't know how to justify herself. Her usually creative imagination had suddenly gone blank.
"You were thinking of running away?" Albert was looking straight into her eyes without hiding his irritation.
"I wasn't running away," she said lifting up her head and pretending to be indignant.
"Going out the window at midnight, jumping to a tree, almost getting killed and taking a suitcase...isn't that running away?" Albert clenched his fists trying to contain all the anger he felt.
"No," she said in the same tone of voice.
"What is it then?" Albert wanted to shake her.
"That's it: leaving without saying goodbye."
Albert smiled; only she was capable of making him smile when he was angry.
"And may I know where you were thinking of going?"
"To Pony's Home."
"Don't you think it's a little far away to walk there, and in the middle of the night for that matter?" he said ironically, trying to make her see how imprudent her decision was.
"I know that."
"Well, then?" Definitely a little spanking would do her good, Albert thought angrily.
"Well...it's because...because everybody makes decisions without taking my opinion into account. They arrange my life as if I were an object..."
"That's not true!" said Albert with indignation.
"It is and you know it! You decided to marry me and you didn't even ask me if that was what I wanted."
"Well...I..." He remained speechless.
Of course he wanted to ask her, but he hadn't done it because of everything that had come over him. However, he had to confess that he was afraid Candy would refuse, and from what he had just heard it was very likely that she would...He was overwhelmed with a fear very similar to desolation.
Candy went on, determined now to tell him everything.
"And what's more, Great Aunt Elroy decides to bring me here, without taking into account that I'm working, or rather that I was working, because I'm sure they won't hire me again, not there or in any other place," she added desperately.
She took a deep breath and continued, unable to stop.
"She simply ordered me to pack my suitcase and put me in the car." She crossed her arms dejectedly.
"And this is nothing."
She fixed her eyes on Albert who was looking at her without blinking. "...She forced me to change my hairstyle. She said that as your wife I couldn't go around in pigtails and that my dresses didn't suit an Ardlay woman."
She sighed in resignation.
"And every afternoon she forces me to walk with the Bible on my head and to learn the names of all your ancestors...and their friends," she finished in dismay.
"Really?" Albert was bewildered.
"Yes," she answered with anguish, making a pout.
She didn't tell him about the bodice; that was too personal.
"You can't imagine how it is every day under her tutelage."
"I assure you that I know what you mean..." he said looking at her rather sadly. He understood her perfectly. He had spent his whole childhood under the same rigid tutelage.
"And why all this? I'm not even an Ardlay anymore." Her voice almost broke.
Candy took a deep breath; she couldn't fall apart that moment. Actually she was not affected by not being an Ardlay but by the fact that there was not any paper that united her with Albert...That was what hurt her most but she couldn't let him realize it...
"...So I have nothing to do here now." She looked away, hoping that her eyes would stop being clouded by the tears.
Albert looked at her with remorse. Her life had turned upside down and he was mostly to blame for that.
"You have never stopped being an Ardlay." His voice was modulated to such an extent that it sounded like a caress.
Albert caught her by the shoulders and gave her an understanding look. Candy felt she was about to faint; that contact was something she should have been accustomed to but it was as if it were the first time he had ever touched her.
"Candy, in the library I wanted to explain to you clearly but you were upset and left without giving me the time to do anything," added Albert in a gentle voice.
"What did you have to explain to me?"
"In the papers you signed there is a clause that says you won't stop being an Ardlay."
"What?" Candy felt her feet slightly wobbling.
"I could never leave you unprotected. If anything happened to me until the wedding and I had left you completely out of my guardianship, you would be helpless, that's why I asked George to include that clause."
Candy felt her heart constricted; she didn't want anything at all to happen to Albert...She would die if anything happened to him...That thought filled her with utter sadness, so the best thing for her to do was to turn her attention to something else...for example, that clause.
"What does the clause say exactly?" she asked trying to hide how desolate she felt.
"That you'll stop being under my guardianship the day you sign the wedding documents."
Candy's heart began to beat so wildly that her chest hurt. Why was Albert so concerned about her? He had thought of unthinkable things so that he wouldn't leave her unprotected. She looked at him trying to find out why he was so interested in her, why he took so much care of her, and she felt about to faint when she saw so much tenderness in his eyes.
"Why, Albert? Why are you doing all this for me?" she asked in a whisper as if talking to herself, while her heart was beating furiously inside her chest.
Albert remained speechless. It was the same question George and Aunt Elroy had asked him and he had even asked himself during all
those days.
Why? Why? Why?
So many answers were passing through his mind but none of them was true enough. There was something deeper, hidden behind his reasons...but it was still too early to face it.
"Be...because I care about you...because I'm fond of you," he murmured slowly, as if he were talking to himself.
Yes, that was a good reason not to leave her unprotected. He was fond of her, although he was well aware that behind that "fondness" there was something more primordial that made him restless. It was too elementary to take it lightly.
"I'm very, very fond of you too, Albert," emphasized Candy firmly, admitting that this was a sufficient reason for her to accept his concern...although deep down she would have liked to hear other words...
Both of them smiled, trying to accept each other's reasons; that was the best.
"Albert, I wanted to talk to you," said Candy while they were walking towards a bench near the greenhouse.
"About what?"
"About the wedding." She lowered her head. "You don't have to marry me...like this...because you're obligated." She didn't know why she felt so sad telling him that.
She had had plenty of time to prepare what she would tell him but now she wasn't sure of what she was going to say. Moreover, for a moment she regretted having tackled that subject and she felt desolate.
"Candy," Albert called her, turning towards her.
He caught her by the shoulders, turned her to him and with his index finger lifted her chin.
"I don't feel obligated to marry you," he said so softly that Candy felt she was melting with the tone of his voice.
"Yes, you are," she answered sadly. "If Great Aunt Elroy hadn't found us everything would be as before."
"Sometimes things happen for a reason."
"But it's not fair that you should want to ruin your life because of my
reputation," she said, reminding him that that was why they had to get married.
"Don't say that."
Albert took her face with both hands and looked at her. He didn't know why, but that decision was stronger now. If he was sure of something, it was that he wanted to look into those eyes as soon as they opened in the morning and that they were the last thing he wanted to look at before he would fall asleep...
"Candy, I am well aware that the way things happened was not the most appropriate nor the most romantic..." He smiled slightly while Candy was blushing "...But I think that the best thing that can happen to me in this world is to share my life with you." Saying that out loud sounded rather strange.
"You don't mean that."
"Of course I do. Why do you think I would say it? Do you believe it would be so bad to share your life with me?"
"No, certainly not," Candy hastened to reply. "It's only that...I don't know if I will be the wife you need." She tilted her face towards his hand so she could feel his warmth. "Don't you think we lack the most important thing to make such a serious decision?"
Albert avoided her eyes. He knew very well what she meant: love. But they had something equally strong, something that is found very rarely...That need to be close to each other...That trust that sometimes isn't found even in a couple...And he was unable to define that with words.
"But we have something that will unite us forever, Candy."
"What?"
"Friendship and affection."
"And do you think that is enough?"
Albert focused his blue eyes, shadowed by the darkness of the night, on the emerald green eyes that were looking expectantly at him, evaporating a feeling he had begun to perceive little by little in her. He was not a schoolboy; he was a man and he knew very well that she looked at him differently since some time ago...
"...You know, Candy, when you are not close to me I feel restless," he confessed. "I don't know if this serves as an argument but if we marry, we'll spend a lot of time together." The very idea made both of them shudder. "We won't have to worry anymore about what Aunt Elroy will say..."
Both smiled with complicity.
"I miss you too when you're not around. I miss you a lot...I need you..." answered Candy, unable to believe what she had just said.
Of course she needed him, more than she had thought; she had just ascertained that. All those days without him had been endless...
"This is a reason, isn't it?" asked Albert, caressing gently her cheek.
"Yes...Yes, it is..."
But Candy had already realized it was not just need what she felt whenever Albert was not around. A weakness overwhelmed her when she didn't see him. That should also be taken into account, right?
"Candy..." said Albert, feeling a little cramp in his stomach because of what he was about to tell her. "I believe that until now I haven't been able to propose to you as I should..."
Candy bit her lip while the butterflies began to flutter in her stomach and went up like bubbles, as she sensed what he was going to say.
"So I think that if it's not too late yet...that is to say, I think I'm still in time to ask you..." Albert was visibly nervous. "Candy, will you marry me?"
Candy's heart stopped for a moment and then began to beat loudly, so loudly that she thought it would come out of her chest. Albert was there, holding her hand gently with his fingers, with the moonlight sparkling on his hair, and with a look that left her breathless. He was proposing to her!
For a moment her mind went completely blank, with just Albert's question fluttering inside her brain. That moment she realized that this was the only thing she had ever wanted to hear all her life...her "prince" proposing to her...and the only sensible answer she could give him was "yes". It didn't matter why, the only thing that mattered was that she wanted to say yes.
"Yes...yes, I will," she answered, startled at how certain her reply was.
That reply was as if adrenaline had been injected through his veins. Albert drew her to him and hugged her tight, feeling relieved...She had said yes.
"Now I believe things are as they should be, aren't they?" he said without releasing her.
"Yes..." she replied with a nervous giggle, unable to believe what was happening.
Albert lowered his head a little. Those lips were calling to him to come close. And he wanted to do it, with a desire he had never felt before. But not yet...So he placed a soft kiss on her cheek.
Candy felt her face blushing. She would have wanted that kiss to go straight to her lips...What would Albert's kiss be like?
"What were you doing in the garden at this time?" asked Candy suddenly, trying to forget her longing for his lips.
"I couldn't sleep."
How could he possibly sleep after he had seen Candy leaving the library like that, completely ignoring him, something he wouldn't have allowed anybody else to do?
He had wanted to go and find her in her room, but he knew his aunt
was well aware of where he was going when she went to sleep.
Candy's attitude was very far from what he was used to. And a little voice was telling him that if he went to sleep, he wouldn't see her the next day. Thank God he had listened to that voice and he had practically stood guard under Candy's window, although he had also to admit that he was tempted to climb that same tree from which she had come down.
"I was biding my time..."
"Biding your time? What for?" asked Candy, who didn't understand.
"To come up...I wanted to talk to you...about us, about our marriage..." he confessed a little embarrassed.
That confession made Candy's heart break...He had wanted to talk to her, just as she had wanted to talk to him...
"Will you ever forgive me, Candy?"
"Forgive you? For what?" asked Candy, completely confused.
"For everything you've had to go through these days. For letting my aunt bring you here, not caring about your job. For your pigtails." He caressed her hair. "For your dresses. Your life is upside down because of me."
Hearing those words from his lips, these things didn't seem so important to Candy anymore. She would gladly go through them all over again.
"It doesn't matter now," she said smiling.
"But just a while ago...you said..."
"I was angry, but I'm not anymore," she answered quickly.
Albert looked at her; that slight change in her hairstyle was worthwhile.
"I like your hair as it is..." He touched one of her curls, while he felt an almost uncontrollable desire to sink his fingers into that silky hair.
"You do?" Candy asked anxiously. If she had known he liked it that way, she would have abandoned her pigtails a long time ago.
Albert nodded slightly.
Their eyes met. Albert began to tilt his face slowly. Those lips were screaming to him to come closer.
Candy felt Albert's breath brushing her cheeks and she instinctively opened her lips, waiting for him...Her eyes began to close, but the fluttering of an owl very close to them made them separate, visibly agitated.
"We'd better go inside; it's very late," said Albert with a more serious voice than usual.
"Yes, I think so," she replied with her voice trembling, clearly disappointed.
Albert extended his hand to Candy, asking for hers. She hesitated a little before she gave her hand to him. As soon as she felt his contact, a shudder ran through her. She had never walked hand in hand with anyone...It was the first time.
"Albert..."
"Tell me..." His voice sounded gentle.
"Do you think I can go to Pony's Home tomorrow?"
Albert would have wanted to tell her that if he had come to Lakewood, it was only to see her, but he couldn't keep her locked up.
"Of course you can. But a chauffeur will take you there and bring you
back."
"That's fine. Thank you."
"You have nothing to thank me for."
That was freedom, and Albert was giving it to her. That kind of freedom made her feel free and imprisoned at the same time...For a moment she wished he wouldn't let her go. Sometimes even she didn't understand herself.
Both sneaked in through the garden entrance. Albert gave her a kiss on the cheek when he accompanied her to her room and then he walked away.
Candy rubbed gently the place where he had kissed her. She wondered again what kissing him would feel like. Unable to avoid it, she brought her fingers to her lips and touched them. A strong heartbeat was the response of her body. What was the matter with her? Why couldn't she stop thinking about Albert's lips? She shook her head. Every time it was getting worse and worse. It was a good thing that only she knew about it.
In the shadows, a pair of brown eyes had witnessed that parting. Aunt Elroy closed her door stealthily so that they wouldn't know she had seen them. She approached the window from where she had been watching everything. If she had discovered it months ago, she would have kept them apart as she should. But now it was a little late to interfere with a feeling that was palpable in the air.