Hey all my pretty ladies! (and handsome gentlemen, if I happen to have any of those reading...) It's that time of the week again! Woot woot!

So, first of all I must tell you all that my football team won! AND my crush's team won too! We all know what that means for tomorrow... *wink* *wink* AND my friends convinced me to text him and bet him a drink at the local bar that my team won. I did, figuring he wouldn't text back (either because he deleted my number of because he knew it was me and didn't want to answer haha) anyway he replied! And he said we're on for the bet! ...Now I just need to figure out what to wear. What does one wear to a high school football team when their crush coaches for the opponent? Hmmm...

Did everyone watch Band of Brothers on tv Sunday? (Or Monday or Tuesday?) I did! And it gave me a HUGE burst of inspiration. I watched about 5 1/2 hours of the show (I wanted to watch more but my parents kept asking me to randomly help them with stuff in the yard or the barn ugh), and during that 5 1/2 hours I wrote an additional 8,000 words for this story! I must be insane!

Anyway, here's the next chapter. No Lew :( and kinda just a filler, but at the same time some important stuff is mentioned etc, so I guess that kinda makes it not a filler? haha whatever...

Chapter eighteen

The journey back to London was not a pleasant one for Meg. Other than a few medics and the ship's crew, she was the only person on board who wasn't seriously injured. Every minute of her journey was filled with the sounds of wounded and dying men, the moans and cries echoing off the metal walls of the ship.

Her days were spent curled up in a corner of the ship, practically clenching her hands over her ears. She wished she could go outside, but the weather was too foul, so she was kept indoors.

Her nights were agony. She rarely found herself able to fall asleep and when she did, her mind was filled with nightmares.

She kept replaying her few minutes with Private Jones as he slowly died in her arms. Sometimes her dreams would distort the incident, replacing the young private with different members of Easy Company, with her brother, with Lew. She often woke herself with a sob, coming back to reality and realizing she was alone on the ship. There was no one to comfort her and tell her they were just bad dreams. In the small confines of her quarters on the ship, she felt like she was back in Level 3 and it was driving her insane.

With nothing else to occupy her thoughts, sometimes her mind drifted the Level 3. She knew she had been a mess; a shell of a person when she had returned to the IIA after that mission all those months ago. Still, she couldn't help but look over it all now and wonder if sending her to Level 3 had been Marco's best decision. When someone was a crumbling mess of a human being, you didn't send them to the solitary confinement ward of the Agency. You didn't refuse them human contact with the exception of their doctor. And you most certainly didn't keep that up on a daily basis for as long as Marco had.

Maybe it had seemed like the best idea at the time, but now Meg wasn't so sure. Perhaps if she had been out in the world, coping with her pain as it happened, she would know how to handle all of this now.

Instead, her time was spent in mental torture, replaying everything over and over in her head with no one to help her get over it.

Not soon enough for her, the ship docked on the shores of England. Meg was the first one off the ship, practically running as if her life depended on it. There were few situations she couldn't handle in her life, and being on that ship was one of them. If she had her way, she'd be as far away from it as possible, even if it meant running on her own two feet.

"Hello to you too," a voice said to her right as she hurried down the street. Sliding to a stop, she turned before catapulting herself into Adam's arms. At the impact, he let lose a laugh, holding her close. As he held her, she broke lose a sob, letting the tears flow into the shoulder of his shirt.

"Meg?" Adam asked, his voice filled with confusion, his whole demeanor changing when he realized something was wrong.

It took her a moment to respond. Taking a deep breath, she stepped back and wiped her eyes quickly, plastering on a fake smile.

"I'm just so happy to see you," she lied through her teeth, something Adam caught onto right away. He took a step back as well, crossing his arms over his chest and giving her a look; a look which said don't shit with me.

"You're so happy to see me that you ran off the ship with a look of terror on your face and then sobbed into my shoulder?" he asked, his voice filled with disbelief.

"It wasn't terror," she argued as she got into the jeep parked beside them. "It was disgust. You have no idea how awful that ship smelled."

She had to lie; it was in her best interests. If Adam knew how much she had been affected by everything, he would tell Marco. If Marco knew, he'd order an evaluation, an evaluation Meg knew she couldn't pass. And if she didn't pass it, it would be right back to Level 3 for her. When she stepped out of the level doors all those months ago, she swore to herself she would never go back. Even if she had to hide her true emotions and inner turmoil, she was never going to allow herself to be placed in Level 3 ever again.

"Well come on, don't we have to get back to base?" she asked and Adam gave her one last worried look before starting the engine and pulling off down the road.

It only took them a half hour to get to base from the dock. After that it only took Meg another hour until she was able to fill Marco in on everything that had happened since the invasion in Normandy.

The meeting was confidential, open only to Marco, Adam, and Marco's secretary. As the other woman took notes, Meg relayed everything, telling them which towns had been taken by the time of her departure and which would have likely fallen since then. They all listened closely, the two men occasionally jotting down notes of their own as Meg continued to rattle off cities, companies, and locations.

The time was mostly spent looking over maps as Meg relayed which towns had been taken and which would most likely be taken in the coming days. Because of her quick departure from Normandy, she wasn't able to give them as much information as they all would have liked, instead focusing on the what-ifs and most likely scenarios.

She tried not to speak too highly of Easy Company, worried Marco and Adam would raise their eyebrows at her, but it was hard when they were already mentioned so much. She knew Easy Company was considered the best company in the 101st, but after seeing the stats and information from D-Day written down, she knew this was absolutely true.

"If that's all, I need to be heading off to London," Meg said when the meeting was finished, helping to roll up some of the maps they had scoured over. Seeing her cue, the secretary ducked out, leaving the other three alone.

As she tied the maps, Meg became painfully aware of the two men watching her intently. Glancing up, she caught Adam's eye and he quickly looked away.

"Actually Meg, I want you to head down to Dr. Richards'," Marco said casually, almost as if it was a simple, everyday request. Meg knew better though. She paused, a map half-rolled, as she glanced at him with suspicion in her eyes.

"Why? As you can tell I'm perfectly fine."

"It's just a routine check Meg. If Dr. Richards thinks you're fine, then you're fine. We'll discuss your next mission when you're done."

Glancing quickly at Adam, she knew his look meant she was on her own. Realizing she had been dismissed, Meg stood with a sigh, storming out of the room and down to Dr. Richards' office.

What a bother.

Dr. Richards was a pleasant man, something which bothered Meg immensely. He was responsible for initially sending her to Level 3 and she felt someone with that job should be a little more formal. She would have liked the man who held her fate in his hands to not be so damn polite about it all.

"It's just a routine check," she repeated to herself as she made her way to his office. She had done enough missions and faced Marco and Adam enough to know how to cover her true emotions. There was no reason the doctor would suspect she'd been having nightmares, or know how traumatized she still was whenever she accidentally pictured Christian in Private Jones' place. Her nightmares had changed, focusing on this incident now, instead of the other one. Still, the characters were the same, and it was somewhat more terrifying for her.

"Ah, Meg," Dr. Richards said when she walked into his office and she stopped, startled. She had been so deep in thought she hadn't realized she was already at his office. She had hoped to spend an extra few minutes outside, preparing her mask of emotion. Now she was here and it was too late to turn around. She'd have to mask quickly.

Mask quickly and hope this check only lasted the routine hour.

"I'm sorry, what?" Meg asked the doctor, leaning forward against his desk. Unlike her first visit after her meeting with Marco, this time the doctor was avoiding eye contact. "Dr. Richards," she said with a chuckle. "Can we perhaps do a hearing check? I thought I just heard you say I was unfit for combat," she told him, secretly hoping she was correct and he was wrong.

"That's because I did Meg," the young doctor said, sitting down in his seat as he looked through a rather thick file.

She had been back at the IIA for exactly one week, and was under the assumption that she had passed the doctor's check when they met the day she got back. Now here she was being told otherwise, something she found absolutely preposterous.

"But that's ridiculous. How could you assess that? I'm perfectly fine," she argued, hoping the doctor hadn't heard the small quiver in her voice. Suddenly she wished she'd thought to put some makeup on. She knew her lack of sleep was causing circles under her eyes and it probably wasn't helping her case much.

"You're not fine Meg," Dr. Richards said, shuffling through her file. "We've been monitoring you for the past week, per Marco's request. You don't sleep soundly, you have regular nightmares, and honestly we're just worried about you."

"I'm fine," Meg repeated more firmly. "I want to be a part of this. I need to be a part of this. What are you going to have me do otherwise, filing?"

"Yes. We're sending you out of the field for the time being. You'll be doing the paperwork side of the job."

"Yeah because that'll make me go less crazy," Meg said sarcastically. "This is all Marco's doing isn't it? Damn him."

At her frustrated statement, Dr. Richards closed the file and set it on his desk, leaning forward and finally looking at her, his eyes a mixture of compassion and regret. She hated it.

"Meg he's just worried, and he has every right to be. These stats don't lie. And it's not so much solitary confinement as a getaway. Besides it won't be all play."

Meg simply raised her eyebrows, indicating she was listening.

"We have agents in the field who need to have correspondence with us. However, as you know, if we were to start getting handfuls of letters to our mail address things would get suspicious."

"So I'll be decoding," she finished, realizing what he was saying.

"More or less. We're sending you back to Aldbourne. Military correspondence to a military base won't raise as much suspicion. Besides, with the men gone it will be relatively empty. I'm sure there will be new recruits training there but not nearly as many as before. It'll be almost like a holiday," he added with a chuckle.

"Are we done?" Meg asked harshly, causing the doctor to stop smiling and look at her. "If I'm heading back to Aldbourne I need to go pack."

"Yes you're dismissed," the doctor said, motioning for her to get up. Without a backward glance, Meg headed out the door, hoping her unsteady breathing wouldn't be detected.

If so, the doctor would probably add it to her overly-large file.

Meg learned quickly that she had taken advantage of her previous time in Aldbourne. She had spent a lot of time in her quarters, reading or spending time with Adam when she should have been spending time with the boys. It's not as if she never spent time with them; her weekends at the pub could attest to that; but suddenly she wished she'd spent more time with them.

Now she was here and they weren't and she knew the next few weeks were going to be completely unbearable.

Each morning she was given a rather large handful of letters. Because each agent used a different code, she had an entire codebook she had to riffle through, looking for the correct one they used and then decoding it. Then she made three piles: high importance, some importance, and little importance.

The information of high importance was compiled into a letter she then recoded and sent off to Base daily. The information of some importance was amassed over a week and then sent, and little importance was kept to the side, only if she needed to use them again, or if something became relevant.

Over the course of the month she was able to pick up some more information of Easy Company. She was quick to notice they were mentioned most out of the other companies, and that they seemed to be involved in the most front line combat. This made her proud, especially because she knew so many members. They had become somewhat of a family to her and hearing that they were becoming just as respected by everyone else, she swelled with sisterly pride.

She silently applauded their success at Carentan on the 13 of June. She wished she had been there to congratulate them in person, but she knew her silent wishes would have to do. Besides, with her stationed at Aldbourne, hopefully the men would return here if they had time off the lines. Hopefully she would see them again soon.

Thoughts of seeing them also made her stomach drop. Would she see all of them? The odds did not seem to be in favor of that idea, especially with their constant successes. Battles did not come without casualties on both sides and Meg knew at least one member of Easy Company had most likely already met their untimely end. Would it be George? Joe? She hadn't heard from Lew in weeks so she silently prayed it wasn't him. She didn't know what she would do if Lew was killed in battle and their last moment together had been that brief greeting in France.

On July 1 Meg received a letter in the mail addressed specifically to her. Smiling when she recognized the handwriting, she rushed back to her quarters, eager to open it.

Meg,

I hope Aldbourne's treating you well. I heard Marco sent you there and I know you're probably frustrated but consider it relaxation time. This war won't be ending anytime soon and if I know you, you'll be fit for duty in no time. When I was up at Base before my last orders Marco told me he was planning something big for you. He wouldn't go into details (and even if he could I couldn't write them to you anyway, even with our code) but expect to be getting orders soon. Also don't let him know I told you, he'll tear me a new one if he found out.

The main purpose for this letter is actually two other reasons. First, I've been stationed with the 101st. I'm working directly with the intelligence side of things and before you ask, yes I'm working with Lieutenant Nixon. And speaking of Nixon, little birdies have been telling me things about you and the Lieutenant. We'll discuss that when I come back.

Speaking of coming back, I met up with the 101st as they were being pulled off the frontlines. The men haven't been told yet, but they're shipping us back to Aldbourne for a while until they decide what to do with us again. I thought I'd give you fair warning so we didn't surprise you with our arrival. I know how you women can get, so this gives you plenty of time to pick out a nice dress and make sure your hair looks good.

I'm constantly getting asked about you Meg. Mostly from the Easy men. It amazes me how you were able to get all these men wrapped around your finger when you were barely with them for weeks at a time! I'm also happy because I know how hard it has been for you to become attached to people. Seeing all these men ask about you, I know you've gotten over that problem somewhat, and I know I'm not the only man who looks out for you. Of course, if it turns out all of these men are sweet on you, I may have to get over my happy feelings and let a few punches fly. I am still your only brother; it's my duty to act this way.

Nixon sends his regards. Apparently he's been writing letters to you but he didn't know how to send them to you since you're no longer stationed in London so they've built up. I told him you've been getting enough mail the last few weeks and that it would look suspicious if an enemy got a hold of 10 letters addressed to Meg Myeroff at Aldbourne. Don't shoot me when you get back. I'm doing it for your own good. There's something you should know about the Lieutenant, something I don't want to tell you through post.

For now I'll just say I'm excited to see you in a couple weeks' time. Make sure to have a nice cup of tea waiting, these Yanks don't appreciate it as much as we do.

Lots of love,

Adam

Meg groaned in annoyance, throwing the letter aside.

She knew Adam was just going to tell her Lew was married. The man wore his wedding ring for Christ's sake; it wasn't that hard to figure out. She understood that Adam wanted to continue to play the big brother role, but she was a grown woman and if she wanted to have an affair with a married man, then God damnit she was going to have an affair with a married man! There was nothing Adam, or anyone else for that matter, could say to sway her otherwise.

It had taken her so long to become comfortable with all of this, she wasn't going to turn around and let Adam force her out of it with a few words. Besides, hadn't he said he was pleased to see her becoming attached to people again? If she had attached to anyone in the last few months, it was Lewis Nixon and there was no way Adam would tear her apart like that.

Setting all those thoughts aside, Meg willed herself to be excited by the rest of the letter.

The men were coming back to Aldbourne! She wouldn't be alone anymore, and she would be with her favorite people after being away from them for so long.

It's been a while since I've asked, so tell me what you think! I'd like to know what's going on in your pretty/handsome little heads as you're reading what I've written. Also, root for my team to win this big football game tomorrow! GO TOPPERS!

Rose2621 - Thanks for the review! I'm glad you thought the reunion was well written. I redid parts of this chapter so much, but that was the one part I refused to change under any circumstance, so I'm glad I'm not the only one who enjoyed it haha. Hope you liked this chapter as well.

LovingBOBThePacific - I'm glad the problem with your friend is gone! One of my closest friends lives in a different time zone too haha. It always confuses me when she's all "I can't believe I have to stay at work until 6 tonight." and I'm all "Gretchen...it's almost 7...oh yeah time difference" hahahahaha. Yeah, Meg can totally vouch for the "love sucks" thing lol, but I think her reasons for love sucking are much different than ours, although I don't think I'd fancy being in her situation either. I'm glad you liked the letters! My first draft didn't have any letters (that I remember) and I've added them all in this time around. Thanks so much for your review!

SparkELee - I'm sure everyone thanks you haha, especially judging by how high my readership was the first day, just by publishing 40 minutes early! I agree, I think her suffering is a little more evident in this chapter. It's slowly been creeping forward, but in this chapter it kinda hits. I'm glad you think they're realistic. I was worried I hadn't put them in enough so phew! As for the whole Normandy invasion, you have NO idea how long I sat there trying to think of what she was supposed to be doing. I wrote everything with her over there, then at the top of the section I had something in all caps that was like WTF IS SHE DOING HERE!? FIGURE OUT A REASON WHY SHE WOULD BE HERE or something like that hahaha. And yeah, the dying soldier scene got me too haha. I originally had it shorter and insignificant but I was like, hold up, would this be insignificant to you? Would it be insignificant to Meg? Hell no! And did you like that catapult? I thought it was too perfect an opportunity to pass up haha. I totally kept replaying that in my mind, so that's kinda what the whole Normandy scene was revolved around: that brief moment of her running to him haha. Also, I LOVE that you love Meg! She's become a big part of me these last few weeks, and I'm a large part of her as well, so that makes me happy haha. As for the one or two chapters without Lew, I think you'll be happy to know he's back next chapter. Shhh, don't tell anyone haha. I don't like giving secrets away lol. Thanks for your, as always, amazing review! Enjoy your pants!

paintmyworlddarkblue - Yay reunions! I'm glad you thought the helmet scene was adorable haha. I think, when watching the series, adorable isn't really a word many would use to describe Nix, so I tried to play up that side a bit in my story. And I know what you mean about not knowing the right word to describe that scene. I still can't even describe that scene haha. Ahh I'm so glad you're curious about the Christian thing! I've done my job well! Don't worry, it WILL be explained...it just might be a bit. And I wish I lived in a different era too. I'd probably fit best in the 40s, although I wouldn't mind the 20s or 30s either. My friend calls me his 1950s housewife because I always clean the bar he owns and bake him food etc. My other friend calls me a step back for feminism hahahaha. As for the counselor, I'd wait until college. Most schools offer it free with tuition and they're nice just to talk to. Plus, it's good to go see one when you're feeling fine because then you build that relationship so if/when you do get bummed, they know you and know what to say/do to help. Thanks for your review!

onebyone - so funny story. I was reading your story yesterday and I was thinking "This story is so good, I need to get this author to read MY story...maybe I'll mention it when I review..." and then I happened to look at the top of the chapter and was like "Oh! I recognize that name! They've totally reviewed my story!" hahahahahaha. And believe me, I totally understand the not reviewing as much as one should thing. I probably review 20% of the time. It's awful, I know haha. I'm trying to make myself better at it. And stop making me blush! I'm flattered you admire my writing; it means a lot to me to hear that. You're a great writer too! I can't wait to read your next chapter! I hope you enjoyed mine! Thanks for your review.