Well hey! I hope you all had an absolutely wonderful Christmas/Hanukah/Kwanzaa/anything else you celebrate! Also, I want to wish you all a very Happy New Year since that will be occurring before my next chapter. And, as you've probably noticed, I published this one early! That's because my mom, sister and I are off to see Les Mis at the movie theater and it was either publish early or publish late hahaha.

Today's a special/hard day for me. I want to ask that you all take a moment tonight to think of my small community. I don't usually go into stuff this personal, but 10 months ago today there was a shooting at my sister's high school (and my alma mater) that took the lives of 3 boys: Danny, Demetrius, and Russell. I can't believe it's already been 10 months, but since it's almost the new year, I ask that you each take a minute to think about all the kids and their families that were affected by this, and hope that this new year can bring about a new start for all of them. As is always our community's motto: one heartbeat.

Side note, this chapter is a BIG one that I know A LOT of you have been waiting for... I don't want to give too much away, but some stuff is revealed in this chapter... wink wink.

Chapter Twenty-Four

Meg hated packing. Some people found that weird, since her job required her to move around a lot, but every time she packed, Meg felt like she was packing her whole life away. She had hoped that being stationed permanently at Aldbourne for the last three months meant that perhaps she would be here for good. Or at least until the men returned again. But here she was, folding her blouses and dresses and stuffing them in her bag.

She hoped the General had a clothes iron.

Her life had been pretty boring since the men of the 101st left back in September. She had gone back to her task of receiving and sending coded letters for the IIA. Adam had been with her for a while, before he too had been shipped off somewhere. This time he wouldn't even give in and tell Meg where he was going. The only letters she had gotten from him since then had been formal, coded ones just like all the others she read day in and day out. Occasionally he would include a one-lined note to her, but most of the time his letters stayed as professional as the rest.

Now it was December 17 and she was finally being sent on the mission Adam had alluded to months earlier. The orders from Marco had arrived three days before, giving her plenty of time to finish up the letters she had been working on and pass all the work on to another agent stationed at another military base. Now she was leaving tomorrow and it was about time she got packing.

Not that she'd need much. The General always made sure to provide her with the best clothes and jewelry that money could buy. Other than a few undergarments and a few personal things, not much was needed on her end. Especially on this trip.

Marco's letter had informed her that the General was joining Hitler in Berlin and he had written requesting that she join him. Apparently he wanted her at his side to show off, because all men of power were required to have a beautiful woman at their side. It didn't matter that to him, she was just a whore. He could dress her up and pretend she was more than that.

Sometimes Meg wondered what would happen to all these men if they found out what she was; who she was. They treated her like common street trash, but someday soon they would know who she was and what she was capable of.

Stopping to shake her head, Meg sighed. Thoughts like that would do no good on this mission. Wanting any kind of revenge wasn't healthy and she knew that. Most likely, the General would never know her as more than Vivian, the French whore. That's how it was supposed to stay. She needed to stop thinking of all this and just pack. There would be plenty of time to dwell on these ideas when the war was over.

Just as she was reaching for Gone with the Wind, a knock sounded on her door.

"Come in," she called softly as she grabbed the book and placed it in her bag. She didn't know who would be knocking; most of the men still on base wouldn't normally talk to her, let alone come to visit her. The sound of boots on the floor caused he to look up...and freeze.

Lew was standing there, dressed in his dress uniform, a bag thrown casually over his shoulder and a large grin on his face.

"What are you doing here?" Meg asked, her voice a hushed whisper.

"You know, usually people say hello," he said with a wink. In response, Meg hurried forward and threw her arms around him, causing him to drop his bag as he wrapped his arms around her in return.

"Hello," she said with a kiss before pulling back. "So what are you doing here?"

"48-hour pass," he said, not removing his arms from around her.

"But aren't you over in Europe?"

"Mourmelon," Lew said and Meg frowned in confusion.

"But you were able to get away for 48 hours to visit me?"

"Well who else would I visit?" he asked. Immediately Meg made a noise, the name Katharine on her lips. Lew seemed to realize it too and they both stood awkwardly for a moment before he cleared his throat. "After I sent Dick off to Paris I figured I'd come check on you. Make sure you haven't killed yourself out of boredom yet."

"Nearly," Meg said with a dramatic roll of her eyes and Lew chuckled. Meg's eyes searched his face, looking for any signs that he had changed or been hurt. "What's that?" she asked, pointing to a mark on his forehead.

"That?" Lew asked, trying to sound nonchalant. "Stray bullet."

Meg's eyes widened.

"A stray bullet hit you in the head? How are you not dead?"

"Grazed," he clarified with a smirk. "It went through my helmet and grazed my head. No harm done, but a little burn."

"And are those Captain's Bars?" she asked, pointing to his collar. Lew nodded and Meg smiled. "Boy, you're coming back to me all sorts of different Captain Nixon."

"You know you're still allowed to call me Lew," he told her with a chuckle, his eyes peering around the room. His laugh died as his eyes landed on her bag.

"Are you going somewhere?" he asked and Meg's smile dropped.

"Germany, I think," she said and Lew's face snapped to hers.

"Orders?" he asked and she nodded.

"The General has requested I join him in Berlin-"

"Berlin!? Meg are you fucking with me?" Lew cried, grabbing Meg's arm and forcing her to look at him. She winced at the combination of his loud voice and tight grip. "After everything he's done, you'd still go all the way to Goddamn Berlin for him?"

"Lew don't make it sound like that," Meg said, keeping her voice calm. "This is my job, remember? I don't have a choice."

"But you do have a choice! Meg, I won't let you put yourself at risk like that. Berlin? Jesus, that's a death wish."

"Lewis Nixon I don't know when you were given authority over me," Meg's voice rose slightly. "This is my job, these are my orders, and I'm going."

Lew sighed, releasing her arm and putting his hands on his hips, looking at her sternly. Suddenly it was as if a wave rolled over him. His muscles relaxed, his face softened, and he reached out for her.

"C'mere," he said, his voice much softer. Meg cautiously stepped forward, allowing herself to be enveloped in his arms. "I'm sorry," he said as he placed a kiss on the top of her head. "It wasn't my place to say all that."

"You're right, it wasn't," Meg said before tilting her head up to look at him. "But I love you all the more for saying it all anyway."

"I just worry about you," he continued, squeezing her a little tighter. "Any other guy doesn't have to worry about his girl getting shot or killed but here I am, the unlucky idiot of the bunch who had to fall for a spy."

Meg refrained from rolling her eyes at his use of the word spy. She wanted to remind him that he could have stuck with Katharine and then he'd be in the same boat as all the other guys but she didn't want to get into another argument so soon after the first one.

"Well I worry about you too," she said instead, leaning up to give him a quick peck. "You're at as much risk as I am; probably even more. I know you Easy boys are as close to the front lines as you can get."

"But not for the next 24 hours I'm not," he said with a smirk, lifting her up to spin her around.

"Nope, tonight you're all mine," Meg said with a laugh before leaning down to kiss Lew for real.

She never wanted to let go.

"Christ," Lew said some time later. "I had forgotten how small these beds are. I think we took advantage of that double bed in London."

The two of them were currently shoved together on her small regulation bed, continually moving to find a comfortable position for both of them.

"You could always sleep on the floor," Meg shot back and Lew let out one laugh, leaning down to kiss her bare shoulder.

"But then I'd miss this great view," he commented and she grinned, rolling around so she was facing him. "Wow, it just got a million times better," he added and she rolled her eyes, reaching up to run her finger along his jaw.

"You need to shave," she told him and he sighed.

"So I've been told. I could shave three times a day and still have stubble when I went to bed."

"If my face is all red in the morning, everyone will know who to blame," she accused and he shrugged, pulling her tighter to him.

"Baby, no one's gonna see it but you and me, and I won't judge," he teased, leaning down to give her a lazy kiss.

"You know I'm supposed to leave tomorrow," she said suddenly, causing Lew to pull back and look at her. "I suppose I should phone Lynette and tell her I'll be late and won't have time to sleep when I get to Paris."

"Hey at least this time Paris isn't occupied," Lew said, making light of the situation. "And if you went tomorrow you'd probably run into the boys. They're all there on leave."

"That's very tempting," Meg said, pretending to give it some serious thought. Lew smirked and wrapped his arms around her, bringing her closer to him and causing her to forget what they had been talking about.

"Pick them over me?" he asked as he began covering her neck and chest with kisses. "Never."

"Never," Meg repeated in a whispered sigh, closing her eyes and tilting her head back.

"Lew?" Meg whispered as the sun began to peek through the windows.

"Hm?" he grumbled as he twisted his head and got more comfortable. Meg reached her arm up and began to run her fingers slowly through his hair, smiling when she saw the goose bumps spread across his skin.

"I'm sorry I have to do this," she said and she felt him shift again, rolling on his side to look at her.

"If we're gonna have a serious conversation, can it wait until I'm completely awake?" he asked and Meg sighed, slipping down deeper into the covers. In all honesty, she hadn't gotten any sleep that whole night, she was so worried about discussing the situation with Lew. She was going to be with the General for God knew how long, doing whatever he wanted her to. She felt nauseous at the idea of sleeping with someone other than Lew, and she wanted to know if her being with the General bothered him too.

That train of thought suddenly had Katharine popping into her mind. She didn't know what Lew's wife looked like but she could assume she was beautiful and perfect; there was no other reason Lew would have rushed into the marriage so quickly. Was she prettier than Meg? Did she love Lew as much as Meg did? Did Lew love her as much as he loved Meg?

As these ideas spun through her head, she reached up and clutched her dartboard necklace tightly, relaxing in the feel of it. If Lew loved Katharine more, he wouldn't be here with her, visiting her on his short amount of free time. At least, she didn't think he would be.

"You're too tense," Lew's voice suddenly spoke out, causing her to jump.

"I didn't realize you were awake," she said and he nodded, his chin bumping against her shoulder.

"It's hard to sleep when your bedfellow is a rock," he said and she sighed, causing him to tilt his head up and open one eye. "What's wrong?" he asked and she shook her head.

"Nothing," she said, realizing she needed to say more because of the look he was giving her. "I'm worried it will make you upset," she explained and he sat up slowly, giving her his full attention. "I was just thinking about Katharine."

In that moment Meg realized that if one wanted to ruin any type of romantic mood, all they had to do was mention the other person's spouse.

"Why were you thinking about Katharine?" Lew asked, trying and failing to sound like he didn't care.

"Nothing, it's silly," Meg said, brushing it off and rolling on her side. The ideas and questions kept filling her mind however and her mouth spoke before her head could stop it. "Lew? Will you tell me about her? About Katharine?"

Lew sighed, sitting up so he was level with her.

"On one condition," he finally said and Meg leaned forward, wondering what it would be. "Tell me who hurt you. You mention being close to someone before and I want to know what he did to you."

Meg smiled a sad smile, looking down at her hands.

"Alright, but you've got the story idea just a little wrong."

She nestled in closer to him, turning so they were spooning slightly. Reaching for his arm, she pulled it across her waist, resting her head back against his chest. She stayed quiet for a minute, enjoying the sound of his heart against her ear.

"I was six when Adam and I first met Christian," she started, hoping she would be able to tell the story properly. She had never told it to anyone before; everyone had always just known it. "He was in the IIAA with us,"

"The IIAA?" Lew interrupted and Meg sighed, realizing she'd have to explain things more clearly to him.

"The International Intelligence Agency Academy. It was new, and the three of us were the first pupils. We were chosen because we were the only children whose parents were both agents. It was like a normal school with reading, writing, etcetera, but we also learned things like decoding, map reading, and languages. By the time I turned ten I was fluent in English, French and German. After that I also learned Italian but I'm still a little rusty."

"I could barely learn English in school, let alone three other languages," Lew commented and Meg chuckled, feeling some of her tension release a little.

"And you call yourself an intelligence officer...Captain," she said, and now it was his turn to chuckle. "Anyway, Adam and Christian were the same age, so they were always attached at the hip. I think back then they found it annoying that I always tagged along, but I didn't really have anyone else. When we got older, we began working together, and soon our teachers realized that not only could they mold and create three amazing agents, but they could mold and create an extremely powerful team.

"Christian was always good at deciphering and decoding. He was the best when it came to looking at a set of blueprints or a map and figuring out the quickest, safest route anywhere. Adam was the self-proclaimed leader, but neither Christian nor I argued it. He called all the shots and always took charge. I was the technical one. When I was last at Base, I still held the record for fastest dismantle of a 2-47 type A bomb."

She tilted her head and was glad to see Lew looked impressed.

"My girl, the bomb genius," he said and Meg smiled, snuggling up closer against him.

"We started doing small missions when I turned 13. Mostly little things like running messages to the other agents, listening to diplomats at restaurants, things like that. When I turned 16 we got our first big mission. There were rumors of a drug lord hiding in Africa. His wife ran an orphanage, and since both Adam and Christian were 19, I was the only one who could go in under cover.

"I was there for a month and the only man I'd ever seen was the wife's lover. One night when he came, he was drunk and started beating her. I thought he was going to kill her, so I ran to the cupboard at the back of the house where I'd stored my stuff, grabbed my gun, and shot him. It was the first time I'd ever killed anybody."

Feeling her body tense slightly, Lew wrapped both his arms tighter around her, leaning down to place a kiss on her temple.

"Adam was furious. It was the first time we'd ever gotten a black mark on a mission and he thought it was all my fault. We had to escape in the dark of the night and travel undercover back to England. I remember the whole time we traveled, Adam gave me the silent treatment and Christian hugged me. That was when I realized that I was closer to him than my own brother. We weren't fighting forever. It only took a few days for Adam to start talking to me, but that argument brought a lot of things about our relationship to light.

"After that we quickly turned into the most impressive team the IIA had. Marco quickly realized that the IIAA was a success and children of other agents started attending in the hopes that Adam, Christian and I wouldn't be the only successes.

"While that was all going on, the three of us were continuing with our missions. But things were different. Christian and I were closer and Adam knew it. Christian filled in the supportive older brother role that Adam seemed unable to fulfill. I don't know if it was because we were that age where siblings inevitably seemed to hate each other, or if it was because of what happened in Africa, but Adam turned into the third wheel and Christian and I turned into the inseparable duo. I think even Marco noticed the switch, but because it was always best to keep your teams as safe and happy as possible, he let us stay that way."

"How old were you when you got shot?" Lew asked suddenly and Meg sighed, rolling her eyes.

"Let me tell the story," she nagged teasingly. "I was 17. It was 1937 and the three of us were sent over to Spain by a confidential party to support the Republicans during the Spanish Civil War. It was July of that year and the Republican forces decided to take Villanueva del Pardillo. Honestly I came out rather lucky in the whole affair. Both sides suffered major casualties so my bullet wound was minor. We were lucky neither Adam nor Christian got so much as a scratch."

Lew scoffed at her use of the word minor, but otherwise remained silent. She expected a remark from him so it took her a moment to continue with the story.

"In February of '42 we were given our biggest mission; so big it required four extra team members. We got to pick them, and the three of us spent weeks going over agent records, sitting in on IIAA classes and interviewing candidates."

"What was the mission?" Lew asked and Meg was quiet for a moment before responding.

"We were to sneak into Hitler's base camp in Berlin and blow it up."

Neither said anything, both taking in the seriousness of their orders. Lew hadn't realized just how involved she had been with the war in the past. Meg hadn't realized the significance of her returning to Hitler's base camp in Berlin tomorrow. It was almost as if fate was letting her pick up where she had left off.

"A big deal, I know," Meg said, continuing. "I honestly have no reason why Marco chose us for this mission, when he had so many more skilled agents to pick."

"I guess he thought you were capable," Lew said, trying to be supportive. Meg scoffed.

"Or maybe he knew the mission was impossible so he sent us because we were dispensable."

Lew didn't know what to say to her cynical comment so he stayed quiet again, letting her calm down before continuing. He knew it was best to give her time so she didn't stay riled up. She just needed a few deep breaths and she'd be back to normal.

Sure enough, he was right. It wasn't too long before Meg spoke again.

" Carter Smith, Maxwell Reed, Sarah Franklin, and Yvonne Maurice. That's who we chose. Adam had been injured on a previous mission so he was stuck at Base, using new technology to track everything. We all had radio communication to him but since he was out, we needed a new leader.

"I was chosen by a five to two vote. Adam and I both voted Christian, but majority ruled and I was put in charge. This was my first mission as a leader and I was scared as hell.

"When we got over there the first thing we had to do was set up the bombs. Yvonne and I did that. She was a bomb girl straight out of IIAA and together we set six bombs around the building, planning on setting them off one at a time to lessen the overall blow.

"We knew there were British prisoners being held inside somewhere so that's what the other four were doing; locating the prisoners and getting them out. When Christian called over the radio that he needed help, I chose to send Yvonne so I could get back to the detonator."

Meg paused, feeling her body begin to give away her feelings.

"Shhh," Lew whispered into her ear, brushing her hair back and kissing her cheek. "You don't have to finish," he said but she shook her head.

"I do," she said, choking back tears. "I've never told this story out loud before, I need to get it out."

"Take your time," Lew said, leaning his head back to rest against the wall.

Meg waited a few minutes, until she had everything under control, before continuing.

"I was halfway to the detonator when the first bomb went off. Then I heard Christian's voice screaming for me to get out. His voice was immediately followed by the gun shots, then the moans of pain heard through the ear pieces as each of my team members were killed. The last thing I heard was Christian telling me I could run and make it out."

She paused again, catching her breath as she tried to prevent the scene from replaying in her mind; tried to keep the sound of his voice from echoing through her head, but she knew it was useless.

Meg!

Meg you have to get out of here!

Meg, listen to me, you have to get out. It's too late for me; it's too late for all of us, but you can get out. If you run you can make it.

Go!

"They were all killed. Adam and I were the only team members to survive and I was the only one to return from the scene of the mission. We never even got back the bodies of the others."

"Meg," Lew said softly in a pitying tone. Meg ignored it as she continued, trying to finish before her tears took over.

"I started having nightmares, so Marco put me on 24-hour watch in the IIA hospital ward. Survivor's guilt, that's what they called it. Everyone at the IIA told me it wasn't anyone's fault, but I knew it really was my fault they all died.

"It was decided I was unfit for duty and I was sent on leave to clear my head. Marco was afraid I was going to go crazy and do something drastic if I wasn't sent somewhere relaxing. Coming to Aldbourne last year was the first time I had been given orders since that mission."

They grew silent, both of them just lying there together. Lew continued to press soft kisses to the top of her head and Meg just lay there, staring ahead as she digested everything she had just said. She hadn't thought of her whole time with Adam, Christian and the IIA in years.

"I'm sorry," Lew whispered after nearly a half hour had gone by.

"I still miss him," Meg replied. "He was more of a brother to me than Adam, and I'm the reason he's dead."

"Meg listen to me," Lew said, sitting up and pulling her around to face him. "It was not your fault. These kinds of things happen, but you are not to be blamed for their deaths alright?"

"Adam told me that hundreds of times," Meg said, looking down at the bed. "But I know it was me. I was the only one to put together those bombs; and when we set them up I told Yvonne to just watch and learn, I did the whole thing. If that first bomb hadn't gone off, they wouldn't have been alerted to our presence. We would have killed Hitler and my team would still be alive."

"Yeah but then you would have never come to Aldbourne. You would have never met Easy Company and we would have never met you."

Meg looked up then, locking eyes with him.

"I would have never met you," he finished in clarification.

Not knowing what else to say or do, Meg leaned forward and wrapped her arms around Lew's neck, kissing him softly before lying back down and tugging him down with her.

"Just hold me," Meg said as she turned over to glance off into space. "Please just hold me."

He knew she was crying, but instead of commenting, he simply did as she asked.

Wowza! I got a bunch of reviews last chapter! I was so excited when I kept getting notifications! It was like Christmas had come early (or in some cases, right on time hahahaha)

caught-offsides - Thanks! I love her friendship with George too. If her love interest hadn't been Lew, it totally would have been George, so I wanted to make their friendship extra special haha. Thanks for reviewing!

ActiveIngredient - Oh my God, I'm SO glad you love Meg! Creating a character is always a super scary thing for me, especially when lots of people seem to have a strong dislike for Mary Sues, making it even more terrifying to think "shit, what if my character IS one!?" So I'm SOOO glad you like her! And I agree, sometimes it's fun to read stories with Mary Sues; I don't hate ALL of them. But I definitely tried to make Meg more realistic. She does have flaws, and that's what makes her human :) And we have exactly the same beliefs! It was so hard writing some of this stuff because in my mind I'm all "But WHY? Katharine isn't mistreating Lew... doesn't there need to be a huge reason for this to be ok?" and then I realize that no, there doesn't. Sometimes people fall out of love. It happens. It's kinda like the movie Win a Date With Tad Hamilton. Neither man has flaws big enough to make him a definite no, so sometimes that movie's obnoxious to watch because both guys are worthy and both guys deserve her. That's sometimes how real relationships are, so that's what I'm trying to portray. It's not like Katharine's been beating Lew so he has a legit reason to cheat; he's just fallen out of love with her. Thanks for your review!

IceColdInAlex - haha it's all good. I'd wondered where you had gone! So I'm glad you're back :) As far as Market Garden goes, I had to spend so much time writing this that it was ridiculous and eventually I kinda gave up with the mindset of "Well this is my own damn story, I can do what I want" haha. I tried to research a lot of how it was planned, when it was planned, etc etc and since I'm not the biggest history buff I couldn't understand half of what I was reading (and this is on Wikipedia mind you) so I finally decided that honestly, because it was all planned so quickly, they wouldn't have had time to send for Meg and wait for her to arrive. So this is how I played it out and I'm glad you liked it haha. Yay for my story getting better and better! What did you think of this chapter? I'm glad you're still liking this story! Thanks for taking the time to review! And believe me, I totally understand about forgetting to review sometimes hahaha.

LovingBOBThePacific - Thanks for your review, as always hahaha. And I agree, I like to put a face to my characters too, but sometimes it's just too damn hard. If you're able to look at the cover pic I chose for this story, that's kind of how I picture Meg (thus why I chose that pic lol). I'm curious to see what you think of this chapter, since I think you've mentioned wondering what's gone on with Christian. I could be wrong, so don't hate me haha, but I feel like you've mentioned being curious about him in one or two of your reviews. I really want to know what you think of Meg's past now that it's all laid out on the table. Sorry there are no Joe scenes in this chapter haha.

G. - Well since you've skipped down here to read this, I'll first tell you that's cheating ;) And now I'll ask what you've thought of all this in this chapter. I've changed things a teeny bit (not very noticeable) but I addressed some of the things we had discussed so hopefully it all works better now haha. And I know how you feel about Katharine, so there's a bit of her mentioned in this chapter, and I think you'll remember that she comes up again very soon (Meg DID ask him about her after all haha). And aww Snow White. I haven't seen that movie in forever since I think Jenni's still terrified of it. I wonder if the VHS tape is still hidden somewhere... Anyway, Happy New Year Homeskillet! (Don't tell Courtney I took her nickname for you) and thanks for your review!

SparkELee - Welcome back dear! Thanks for BOTH your reviews yesterday! I was so excited to get them both! I'm extremely interested to hear what you think of this chapter now that Meg's entire past is all out in the open. I know you've probably been waiting for this chapter, so voila haha. And I'm glad you think I'm good at blending two tones together. That's probably because of the multiple drafts I write. I'm pretty sure that if you had seen the first copy I sent to my roomie/editor, you would probably be taking back that comment hahahaha. I think there were multiple times when she was like "Uh...shouldn't the mood of this section be more this and not that?" lol. As for last chapter being my best so far, yay! With each chapter I keep feeling like it's getting worse and worse hahaha so it's nice to hear that you and everyone else disagree with me. It's what keeps me writing! Thanks for taking the time to catch up on your reviews! You didn't have to, so the fact that you did makes me value them that much more :D