Hey guys! So here's chapter three. There is going to be an epilogue after this for those who are wondering... Hopefull this portrays both Sean amd Alex's emotions well. I'm a little dissapointed at how Alex"s turned out but hopefully it makes sense. I was trying something new... ENJOY!

Chapter 3

Sean's POV

Sean woke up no more then an hour later. Looking beside him he could see Alex was still fast asleep, tears tracks dried against her cheeks. He got out of bed and walked to the washroom, splashing cold water on his face he took a deep breathe. A failure. That's what he felt like. He knew there wasn't anything either of them could've done to prevent this but he felt like he should of done more.

Being a Navy SEAL he had been trained for every possible scenario. This wasn't one of them.

He felt especially guilty that Alex had almost died. He should've seen the signs, he should've been able to protect her. But now here they are. This morning he was the happiest person in the world and now he felt like a part of his life had just ended. When he thought about it, it had. The life that he and Alex could've had with this child is never going to happen and it drove him mad that there was anything he could do about it.

Sean slid down the wall and put his head in his hands. This shouldn't have happened. Alex didn't deserve this. She'd been through so much in her life she deserved to be happy. He felt a tear slip down his cheek and he quickly wiped it away. Alex needed him to be strong, he had to hold it together.

Standing back up he walked back to the bedroom and got back underneath the covers. As soon as he was in the bed Alex rested her head on his chest, desperate for some kind of comforting contact. He wrapped his arms around her and kissed her forehead. He was so physically and emotionally drained that he quickly found sleep again.

Alex's POV

Alex gently placed the young girl down in the crib. "Sean, are Michael and Nikita coming over tonight?"

Sean stuck his head out from behind the bathroom door. "Yeah. They're bringing the kids too." He said going back behind the door.

Alex turned around when she heard the baby crying again and walked back over to her crib. She was shocked to see the crib was empty.

Confused she called for Sean. When there was no response she walked into the bathroom only to find that it too was empty.

"You don't deserve this." Alex whipped around to see Amanda standing in front of her. Sean was standing next to her and she was holding Alex's daughter.

"You stay away from them!" Alex said walking towards them, anger and fear lining her tone.

"You never deserved this Alex. That's why the baby didn't make it, and that's why Sean will eventually leave you as well." Amanda said.

Suddenly all three of them disappeared. "Sean!? Sean!?" Alex called.

Alex sat up in bed with a start. Her heart was pounding in her chest and sweat dripped down her forehead. She looked beside her and breathed in relief when she saw the gentle rise and fall of Sean's chest. Pulling the covers off she left the bed and went into the living room.

Sean awoke to find the sun had set and outside was dark except for street lights. He looked at the clock and saw it was 3 in the morning. He turned over only to find Alex's side of the bed empty. He stood up and walked out of their bedroom and into their living room.

"Alex?" He asked when he saw her curled in a ball sitting on the couch. "Alex." He said again kneeling down in front of her.

"Sean can you just leave me alone?" She asked, her voice low and thick with tears.

"I'm not going to leave you." He said.

"Sean I just need time by myself."

Sean gazed at her intently. "Alex, none if this is your fault."

"I should've known." She said angrily.

"Known what? Alex even if you had there wasn't anything you could've done."

"Would you stop acting like this happened to you?" She spat out. "It didn't! It happened to me!" She yelled at him standing up from the couch.

"Alex everything is going to be okay." Sean said attempting to calm her down.

"How can you say that!? Nothing about this is okay! I don't know what I'm supposed to do! Or how I'm supposed to act!" Alex yelled at him.

"How can I be upset over something I never really had?" She asked tears flowing down her cheeks.

Sean's heart broke as he looked at her. "Alex, it's okay to be angry. Upset. It's okay, you did have it, we had it. It's okay."

"I don't know how to get over this." She said defeated.

Sean was taken aback by how utterly defeated and hopeless she sounded "I know." He waited a few moments until she finally calmed down. Closing the distance between them Sean tightly wrapped his arms around her dispute her protests. When he felt the skin on her arms he realized how ice cold she was, she was shivering.

He scooped her up into his arms and brought her into the bathroom. He gently sat her down on the counter as he turned the shower above the bath on. When it was heated he gently took Alex's pants and shirt off leaving her only in her underwear. He then took off his jeans. Lifting her back up he sat them down under the hot spray of the shower. Alex laid her head against his chest as she relished both the heat from the water and what was radiating off Sean's chest.

When Alex finally stopped shivering Sean got up out of the shower and quickly put Alex is a pair of flannel pjs. Without speaking the two of them lay down in bed and closed their eyes. They both fell asleep rather quickly but it would not be peaceful, and for months both of them would be tormented by nightmares of what they had lost.

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