A/N Thank you for your reviews and I hope this settles some of your blood pressure! lol.
Disclaimer...Really! You think I own this!...(Backs away slowly looking for the number of a good institution) Okaaaaaay! :)
Chapter 5
Jimmy had dozed off again and Gibbs had laid him down on the couch and draped a blanket over him as his phone buzzed.
"Gibbs." He said and listened to the voice on the other end. "Right I'm on my way." He said and closed the phone.
"Case?" Jimmy asked half asleep.
"Nope you sleep, just gotta pick something up." Gibbs said Jimmy groaned and turned over and Gibbs let a small smile escape as he walked out the door. Even though he had only known Jimmy was his brother for two days he was already fiercely protective of him and proud of the man he was.
He pulled up outside the hospital and stood leaning on the hood of the car as Jackson walked out of the hospital.
"And where do you think you're going?" He asked his father.
Jackson looked at his son and shook his head, "Home, got a store to run Leroy." He snapped.
"Your doctor didn't discharge you, you signed out and they want you back for tests later this week you're staying with me." Gibbs told him.
"Fine." Jackson said and begrudgingly got into the car.
Half an hour later they pulled up outside Gibbs' house, as they entered Gibbs was worried for a second as Jimmy wasn't on the sofa any more until he heard movement in his kitchen.
"Sit down dad." Gibbs said
"Jethro? I made coffee you want some?" Jimmy's voice came from the kitchen
Jackson got up but Gibbs stared him down, "Sit there," He said quietly. "Yeah Thanks Jimmy." He called back.
"His name is James." Jackson growled. "And I ain't staying here if he is, I'll get a motel room."
"Coffee." Jimmy said entering the room smiling until he saw Jackson. "I…Oh," He said his face falling. "I'll get my stuff." He said and turned to go.
"ENOUGH!" Gibbs shouted. "This is my house you will both stay and we will get through this." He ordered.
Jimmy sat at the kitchen table and looked through to where Jackson was sitting on the couch. He grasped the coffee mug he was holding and stared intently at the contents.
"Dad, I want to know why you didn't tell me I had a brother." Gibbs asked.
"Weren't none of your business." Jackson said under his breath.
"Having a little brother is my business dad." Gibbs snapped back
"It's my mistake, not your problem." Jackson said stubborn as ever and refusing to capitulate to anything Jethro was offering.
"Jimmy is not a mistake, He is your son. God, Dad! You were honest but fair with me as a parent, what did Jimmy do that he didn't get any of your love.!" Gibbs was beside himself, having lost a child he knew how precious every child was, the fact that his own father could treat his brother as a non-entity infuriated him.
"How dare you call me a bad parent?" Jackson said,
"Very easily," Gibbs snapped. "He's so sacred of you he won't even look in your direction, I lost my child but while she was alive I told her every day that I loved her. Have you ever told Jimmy?"
"No," Jackson admitted, "I was too caught up in the fact I had made a mistake and slept with his mother on the night you buried your girls. You would not talk to me and Eunice was kind enough to go to the funeral and support me. You looked at me as if I had betrayed you, but I needed that support. I needed you to let me in, I was grieving too!" he sighed as he remembered that night.
"I went home from the funeral with Eunice; she sat as I cried for your girls alone. I may be your father, but I am also a man, I needed comfort and she was there. I had not intended on sleeping with the woman and it certainly did not mean to taint the girls' memories. Then to find out she was pregnant…" Jackson trailed off.
"You know he was a tiny thing when he was born," Jackson smiled to himself. "He was early 5lb 10oz, really scrawny like a little runt."
Jimmy flinched remembering the nickname his father used to call him, in fact when he had started school he told everyone his name was little runt, even though his mother had told him it was Jimmy countless times, it had been one of his first attempts to please his father.
"I did tell you about him I sent you a letter, you never answered and stopped returning my calls. I figured you blamed me for having him." Jackson said.
"I was grieving; I never got your letter." Gibbs admitted. "But even that was no excuse for the way you brought him up, you never held him or spent time with him or just told him you loved him. That's just wrong; no kid needs to be brought up knowing his father doesn't love him." He snapped at his dad.
"But I do love him….I just was too ashamed to tell him."
"You do?" Jimmy said so quietly that Gibbs almost missed it.
"Do ya here that dad, he didn't know." He admonished his father, "You always encouraged me growing up and I became the man I was because of you. How does it feel to know that Jimmy became the man he is in spite of you."
"I was pushing him to do better." Jackson replied.
"Come on, I read the reports on Jimmy's childhood, you gave him a place to sleep. That is about it. He kept trying in school and got straight A's, and yet he learned to hate me because of you. He worked through medical school himself, he has been sleeping in shelters and with friends since he was 17. You would have been horrified if that had been me…He's your son too!"
Jackson sat there listening to all that Gibbs said. He realized that his eldest son was right and for the first time really looked at his youngest son. He remembered all the times Jimmy had come to him with hope in his eyes only to see him dash any hopes he had.
"Oh my God, What have I done." Jackson said looking at Jimmy who still refused to look at him. "I've been a stubborn fool, I didn't realize, I was hurting so bad that I had completely closed myself off."
He got up and walked across the room.
"James." He said and put his hand on his youngest son's shoulder.
Jimmy instinctively yelped and tried to move away. Jackson sat down and looked him in the eye.
"Jimmy." He said quietly.
To hear his father talk softly without malice to him made Jimmy look up surprised and then just as quickly dropped his eyes again.
"I'm sorry son, I should have seen what a remarkable young man you are, yes having you was a mistake, but it was mine and I don't regret having you. I just hope one day you can find it in your heart to forgive me."
Jimmy looked up his eyes full of tears….."NO." He said and ran out of the room.
Gibbs got up and followed Jimmy, "Stay there." He growled to his father as he walked past.
Jimmy was sitting on the back porch staring out at the back yard.
Gibbs sat next to him and waited.
"I'm sorry Jethro," Jimmy said.
"Not planning on leaving again are ya?" Gibbs asked with a slight smile. "You can't keep running away from this."
"Worked so far." Jimmy replied with a sad smile.
"Please, he's admitted he's done wrong, listen to him." Gibbs asked.
"But…what if …" Jimmy didn't want to voice his concerns, the fact that more than anything he'd wanted his dad to say he loved him, but he couldn't allow himself to get hurt by the man again. He had promised himself he would not.
"What?" Gibbs asked.
"I can't do it, not again. I have tried all my life to make him proud of me, to hear him just once say I love you son. To get him to look at me like I was as worthy to be his son as you are." Jimmy looked away from him as the tears he had held back for years started to fall. "What if he changes his mind, I can't finally get that and then go back to how it was before."
"I am proud of you and I do love you, I kept every piece of schoolwork, every picture and achievement award you ever did. I was just too stubborn to tell you." Jackson said from behind him. "I can't promise I'll never get it wrong again, but I want to try to be the father you deserve, if you'll let me."
Jimmy glanced up at his father and saw the truth of his words. He nodded his throat to constricted for anything else to escape.
"Come on little brother, come inside." Gibbs said and gently led them both inside.