Cas's Logical Sequel, Chapter 04
By CastielLovesDean
A/N: There's a reference to Public Displays of Affection. You don't technically need to read it to read this, though.
WARNINGS: Joke about rape; may be triggery for some people.
January 24th, 2012
Dean's birthday was a good day. He could finally stomach the smell of fried food for the first time in weeks, Sam's pants fit him perfectly, and his bump was still inconspicuous under a hoodie, so they took a little vacation to the Grand Canyon. They stayed overnight, then spent the following day doing tourist stuff. They teleported back shortly after lunch.
Dean took a nap in the panic room, then had a dinner-sized 'snack' around three or four. Sammy had left one of his pregnancy books on the table, and Dean skimmed through it out of boredom, stopping to read the section on week ten of pregnancy (Sam pointed out that these books start counting two weeks before the zygote attaches to the uterine wall, so Dean had to add two weeks to find out where he was at). Partway down the page, the book said that some women start to show in this week. He looked at his protruding belly and frowned. He'd been showing for a while. In fact, he hadn't fit into his own pants in nearly a month. He set the book down and walked upstairs in search of Sam so they could discuss this. As he neared Sam's door, he heard Sam and Gabriel arguing from inside the room.
"That was not cool, man!"
"Oh, lighten up, Sammy."
"'Lighten up?' You practically raped me!"
"Nuh-uh! Everybody knows it's not rape if you yell, 'Surprise!'"
Dean so did not need to walk into that, so he turned around to go back to the kitchen. Sam stormed out of the room, slamming the door shut, and caught up to Dean as he was descending the stairs. "Man, he can be a jackass sometimes!"
"Really?" Dean asked, feigning surprise. "Gabriel? He always seemed like such a sweetheart."
"Shut up, Jerk."
"Bitch," Dean chuckled. As they entered the kitchen, Dean said, "Look, I was looking for you for a reason. I mean, maybe Cas would know better-"
"Know what better?" Castiel interrupted.
Dean and Sam nearly jumped out of their skin. Dean gingerly sat in the chair, melodramatically clutching his chest. "Jesus, Cas! How long you been there?"
"You said my name. I thought you might need my assistance."
"Oh. Good thinkin'." Dean picked the book up to indicate it. "I was perusing this book for a minute when-"
"You were not 'perusing' it."
Dean blinked at his Angel. "What?"
"Peruse means inspect or study in great detail. You were not perusing it."
Dean rolled his eyes and half-joked to Sam, "See, Sammy? Dicks, the lot of 'em." He turned back to Castiel and gestured to his protruding belly. "Should I be this big this early?"
"Yes, you're about as large as I'd expected."
"I dunno, man," Sam argued, "I was wondering that myself. I mean, the books say he shouldn't be showing for a couple more weeks."
"That's right, Sam," Cas snarked unexpectedly, "believe the books over an Angel of the Lord. Those books are solely for human pregnancies."
"Wait... what? Human pregnancies? I'm human."
"But I am not. Dean, you did not think that the offspring of a human and an Angel would be human, did you?"
"Oh, my God! It's the Nephilim!" Sam screamed before melodramatically running from the room.
Dean worriedly watched Sam flee, his hand subconsciously moving to protectively cover his rotund tummy. "Nephilim? What the Hell's a Nephilim?"
Sam burst back into the room, flipping through a Bible. "It's here! It's all here!" he squawked excitedly. "Here! Here! Genesis 6:3-4! The Nephilim were on the earth in those days, and also afterward, when the sons of God came in to the daughters of man and they bore children to them. These were the mighty men who were of old, the men of renown," he recited nearly too fast to make out. Before anyone could interject, he had flipped more pages and added, "Here, too! There's more! Numbers 13:32-33! So they brought to the people of Israel a bad report of the land that they had spied out, saying, 'The land, through which we have gone to spy it out, is a land that devours its inhabitants, and all the people that we saw in it are of great height. And there we saw the Nephilim, and we seemed to ourselves like grasshoppers, and so we seemed to them.'"
Dean went cross-eyed from dizziness. He shook his head to clear it and pouted. "Okay. So... what are you saying, our baby's some kinda supernatural freak?"
"She's not a freak," Cas declared vehemently.
"Well, you just said she's not human!" Dean yelled, slamming a fist on the table and getting in Castiel's face. "All our closest friends are Hunters whose life pursuits are to kill supernatural freaks, so maybe I just want some reassurance that we won't have to protect our kids from our own people!"
Dean and Cas glared at each other.
"Alright, ya idjits, what's all the yellin' about?" Bobby demanded as he entered the kitchen.
"Apparently, I'm carrying some kinda mutant hybrid freak-baby," Dean whined.
"I said she's not a freak!" Cas repeated, shaking the house and bursting a couple of light bulbs.
Bobby had grown accustomed to playing mediator to Sam and Dean over the last few years and put his experience to good use. He prioritized how to deal with their argument. "First of all, Dean, don't call 'er a freak."
"Then what should I call her?"
"How 'bout yer daughter, ya idjit! Second of all, are you bitchin' about 'er bein' a Nephal, or is there somethin' else wrong?"
Sam and Dean were shocked. "You knew?" they asked in unison.
"Knew what? The child of a human and an Angel is a Nephal? O' course; it's Biblical creature lore 101. Didn't you?"
"No!"
"Well then, it looks like a couple a jackasses I know need ta spend more time doin' research and less time doin' Angels."
Sam and Dean had just enough decency to look humbled. "So, what can you tell us about them?" Sam asked. "I didn't find much in the Bible."
Bobby glared at him. "You mean since I saw you fly through my livin' room like a banshee thirty seconds ago? Not much, to be honest; there's not a whole lotta lore on 'em. All I've found is that they're huge, strong, and wicked."
"Is Sam a Nehpal?"
"Dean!"
"What?"
"Sam is not a Nephal." Leave it to Cas to take it so literally.
Dean rolled his eyes. "Thanks for clearing that up, Cas. Bobby, can you be a little less vague? How big are we talking?"
"Well, the lore's never completely accurate, anyways..."
"Bobby! Tell me."
"People claimed they were the size of mountains."
"Mountains. Seriously? How the Hell am I supposed to carry a mountain to term?"
Cas pointed out, "When the people described the Nephilim as mountains, they were being facetious."
"Huh?"
"Sarcastic," Sam whispered.
Dean frowned. "Okay, so how big were they really?"
"They were merely very tall. Since girls are usually shorter than boys, I would expect our daughter to be short for a Nephal – probably not much taller than your brother."
"Than Sammy?" Dean repeated. "How 'not much taller' than Jolly Green here is she gonna be?"
Cas cocked his head in thought. "I'd be surprised if Samantha grew to be taller than seven feet."
"Seven feet. Oh. Is that all?" Dean let out a mock sigh and leaned back into his chair casually. "And here I thought she was gonna stand out in a crowd."
"Do you feel better, then?" Cas asked.
Dean smacked his own forehead. "No, I don't feel better! Do you have any idea what school's gonna be like for her? Kids are miniature sociopaths! They're mean to everyone, and if someone's a little different, forget it! I can't even begin to tell you how many scrawny nerds I personally shoved into lockers."
Sam chuckled. "Dean, she's gonna be the size of an adult by the time she's ten. Nobody's gonna be shoving her into a locker. Besides, didn't you say she'd be strong?"
"Yeah," Bobby agreed. "But I think you're focusin' on the wrong part here, guys. The lore also says they're wicked. They were created when Angels went against God's will and mated with humans, apparently infusin' them with some kinda evil. They were so bad, God had to smite 'em all."
Dean looked hopefully to Cas. "Cas? Tell me that's not true."
"That's only partly true, Dean."
"What part?"
"The parts where they were evil and God smote them."
"Come on, Cas, this isn't a joke."
"I'm not joking. They were evil, they wreaked havoc, and the Lord smote them. The key difference here is why. You see, they weren't evil because they were part Angel; they were evil because they were different. You said it yourself, Dean: people are mean to people who are different. People were cruel to the Nephilim because they were different, and thus the Nephilim saw no point in not using their great strength to gain power and make the humans pay. As long as you and I instill our children with compassion, empathy, and a strong sense of right and wrong, wickedness won't be a problem."
"Are you sure?"
"Yes."
Dean was actually relieved this time. "Okay." As long as Cas was sure, he'd be fine. "At least we know one thing."
"What's that?" Sam wondered.
"She has a promising future as a model. Yeah, it'll be great: she'll have an easy job, meet people, go to parties, become famous..." Dean's brain stopped him. Why did people like fame? For the groupies. That's right: sex. "Scratch that. She's not gonna be a model. Nuh-uh. No way. Never gonna happen." Dean spaced out and wandered off to no where in particular, plagued with visions of his nine-foot-tall eighteen-year-old daughter, who never wore panties because they didn't make them in her size, collecting strange men's phone numbers a dozen at a time. It occurred to him then that he should probably learn to sew... or make Sammy do it.
Please review! Okay, just this once, because my birthday's tomorrow (June 10th), and I love reviews. They make my day. And I have to work on my birthday T_T Seriously, it'll only take a minute of your time to tell me what you think.
AN1: For those of you who aren't familiar with the name, "Jolly Green" refers to the Jolly Green Giant. Google it if you're still confused. Really, it's just a reference to Sam being very tall.
AN2: Okay, the info I got about the Nephilim is just from googling it, so I don't know how accurate it is. I did my best under the circumstances. Also, it's not like I could skim an actual Bible because holy items make my skin sizzle :(