Once again, thank you, thank you, thank you, for reading, reviewing, following and clicking on the favorite button. You all have helped me see my way through my first multi-chapter story. While I had the plot mapped out and I knew where it would go, your interest kept me coming back to my computer and putting those thoughts to words. Thank you.
For those who worried that Caroline was being taken advantage of, I would never let that happen. I hope that you appreciate the resolution of that kiss and everything before it.
Caroline was lost to sensation. The days' events, gone. Every single bad thing that happened in the last 24 hours, hell, every bad thing that had ever happened, was shoved into a box and buried deep in a hole as she gave herself up to this feeling. She had no sense of placement, just senses and touches, first a breast, then her a hand at her hip, the fingers gripping hard, then back to her face, and then in her hair, tugging hard. The focal point of every sensation was her lips. Her lips and her tongue and her teeth, all actively involved in making her feel nothing but this awareness that excluded everything else.
She wasn't just an onlooker. With her back against the door, her hands begged for equal time, running down his back, the muscles there sleek and straining. Her hands swept across his face, encountering roughness which scraped along her hands, the friction feeling so good that she wanted to do it again and again. His hair was coarse when she expected silkiness. She decided this was okay because the coarseness sent new, unfamiliar feelings through her hands.
His scent was unique. He smelled of runs in the forest and oil paints. And something else, an unexpected scent, a muskiness that she wouldn't associate with him, but she wasn't completely unfamiliar…
Caroline broke away, panting. She searched his eyes, looking for an answer, attempting to make sense of what was happening. What was she doing? Meantime, Klaus was looking at her with a mixture of desire and confusion and a slow sense of rejection.
"Oh my God," she whispered, her voice cracking. She moved to push him away, but he stayed firm, grasping her arms, though not without gentleness.
"You need to let go of me," she said, her words laced with a growing panic, "why were you kissing me? You can't kiss me! Not now, not when you just-". The words broke off. Caroline couldn't say it out loud, not now after she'd let him kiss her and make her feel so good.
His hands dropped from her arms as he stood straight, taking a step back from her but not completely away. Vaguely Caroline noticed his hair was tousled again, much like it was in the picture she received. A sob caught on her throat as loathing, at both of them, inched its way across her face. She watched his face harden as he grasped her revulsion. She questioned her disappointment as his body language transitioned from softness and desire to the control and impersonal stance she was more familiar with. His arms crossed of their own volition, into the defensive posture he was most comfortable with.
"I have no intention of apologizing," he said, his words cold and clipped.
She looked at him, assessing this man who called up such a variety of feelings in her that it should be illegal. She'd raced to his house earlier out of anger, desperate to take everything she was feeling, the fear for her mother, her sadness laced with anger directed at Elena, the irrational abandonment she felt with Tyler leaving and the rage that had consumed her when she seen that picture sent by Hayley. She'd hurried here to lay all of it at his feet. She wanted to take it, ball it up and throw it at him and let it consume him instead of her.
She also knew that wasn't the truth of it all. Even before the text message had come, as she tossed and turned in her mother's bed, she had yearned for someone to make it all better. No one ever thought to try to make things better for her. No, she was the fixer. She cleaned the blood spots, made the casseroles, worked hard as the sober sponsor and talked insane friends out of causing Armageddon. She did all of that and more and it was expected. Even after being tortured by every creature known to mankind, her recovery was anticipated like the evening news. It would happen without anyone else having to lift a hand. Caroline was so tired. She was so tired and desperately wanted someone to be the casserole maker and sober sponsor for her. As she had twisted in the sheets, she realized there was no one. Then, like a whisper on the wind, his name started as a soft undertone in her head, getting louder and louder the more she ignored it. Klaus.
She should hate him. She should be disgusted with herself. Good grief, he'd probably not even brushed his teeth since kissing that slut Hayley and she wouldn't even consider where else his lips had been. Now that she actually took the time, Caroline picked up other smells; Hayley's scent wasn't the only one she had singled out in the room.
"Oh my God," she repeated, this time louder. "You had sex with her in here, didn't you?"
Klaus had the good grace to flush, though he stood his ground, his lips firm, his eyes giving nothing away.
"You did," Caroline shook her head in disgust, "don't you have any dignity at all? Have you been hiding your man-whore ways all this time?"
Klaus responded with that eye shrug-combination-eye roll that he thought was so charming and walked over to his sketch table, picking up the forgotten tumbler of scotch he had poured earlier. Taking a sip, he considered her words thoughtfully.
"Let me get this straight," he began, "I have sex, in the privacy of my home, mind you. Sex between two consenting, unattached adults, which, not that it's any of your business, was long overdue," he bit out, pointing a finger at her. "if you don't count that time you attacked me in the woods for some hot, hybrid/vampire sex. Your words not mine, sweetheart. And I'm a, what did you call it? Yes, a man-whore. Is that about right?"
Caroline had the grace to look contrite, but not enough to have it quench her growing anger.
"No, you don't talk your way out of this. Just a few days ago, you held me in your arms all night after healing me from a fatal bite, one, oh by the way, you gave me. You let Tyler go, for me, all for me. Your words not mine, sweetheart," she said, repeating his words back to him, "and then, then you have meaningless sex with a slut who ruined your life? I don't think so!"
"I don't recall saying it was meaningless," he said casually, though he looked pointedly at her, judging the impact of his words.
Caroline flinched and took a step back. He said it to hurt her and he was successful. Deep down she knew that what had happened with Hayley hadn't meant anything. Caroline knew Klaus to be someone who felt deeply, whether it be vengeance or love. It was obvious in the dysfunctional way he cared for his family and it was evident in his artwork. Every time he bellowed with anger, he gave himself away. He demanded loyalty and Caroline couldn't think of a time when he'd gone back on his word. Strangely, she knew she could trust him, so when he all but told her that he loved her, she believed him. She also believed that she singularly held his affection. If she had been wrong about this, if Hayley meant something to him, then Caroline had been a fool, one who had welcomed a kiss just feet away from where he'd made love to another woman.
Panic ripped through Caroline and she knew she had to get out of this house, away from Klaus and out of his life. She knew she shouldn't even be here to begin with, she shouldn't be angry at him, shouldn't be expecting him to be her friend and certainly not to be someone she could turn to for comfort.
Closing her eyes, Caroline recalled the deep breaths Stefan had taught her a lifetime ago, in the bathroom of the Grille, breaths to use when controlling her vampirism. She used them now to control the anxiety threatening to overtake her. One breath, two, and then she looked up at Klaus with her best fake smile while she ran her fingers through her hair, giving her hands something to do.
"You're right, Klaus, you're absolutely right. What you do in your own home, or anywhere, that's your business, not mine. I was the wrong, I had no right to come to your home and start throwing around accusations," she said, eyes bright with unshed tears, "as for the kiss, I don't expect you to apologize, it was mutual. I'm just going to go home now and try and get some sleep before school tomorrow."
She turned to leave, but once again, he moved quickly to stop her, grabbing her arms.
This time, though, he didn't keep his hold, his arms falling to his side, but his eyes pleaded for her to stay. The fight drained from her, she made no move to leave, standing there silently while waiting for him to say what he needed to.
With his arms by his side, it gave him an air of openness that she was unaccustomed to. His eyes, too, were bright with unshed tears, as they stared into hers. They stood there for what could have been a moment or a day, Caroline didn't know. Finally, he spoke.
"It didn't mean anything; she means nothing; Hayley," he choked on her name, "means nothing; of course you're right about that. I won't apologize for it, for all the reasons I've stated here tonight, but I am sorry that it hurt you, that I hurt you, that was never my intent." He ran a hand through his hair, clearly uncomfortable with apologizing and exposing his feelings to her yet again, but he continued none the less, "I have been clearer with you in regards to my feelings than I've been with anyone in a thousand years, including my family," he paused, searching her eyes for a reason to continue. She nodded slightly, giving him permission to continue.
"As for that kiss, it was the most exquisite moment of my existence. If that is the only kiss we ever share, it will be enough; you need to know that, sweetheart." He raised his arm, his hand cupping her face, a thumb stroking her cheek. For a moment she leaned into the caress, caught up in him once again. Despite her anger, she knew that, for whatever reason, this man had the ability to make her feel as if she didn't have to carry the weight of the whole world on her shoulders. If she were honest with herself, she'd admit it was the reason she didn't leave with Tyler. She wasn't in love with Klaus, honestly, she didn't even know if she really liked him most of the time. But he had a hold on her she wasn't willing to let go of. She didn't know if it was because she recognized something of herself in him or if she was drawn in by his strength. Whatever it was, Caroline recognized that for now, he remained part of her life.
"I really need to get home," Caroline said, not moving, letting him be the one to break contact this time. He understood the power she was giving him at that moment; she could see it in his eyes. As a quiet understanding passed between them, he stepped back, his hand dropping.
"May I escort you home?"
Caroline didn't even consider it. Reaching deep for what strength she had left, she replied "I'm fine getting home on my own, you should know that. I'm strong, ageless, fearless." A smile touched his lips as she repeated his description of the two of them, standing in the Gilbert kitchen.
"Indeed, love, you are," his arm swept towards the door, showing her the way out. She walked through the house alone, the rooms' dark around her, shadows hiding in the corners.
"Goodnight Klaus," she whispered at the front door, knowing he could hear her.
Caroline drew in a deep breath as the door closed behind her. Turning, she marveled at the redness of the sky and a quiet laugh escaped her as she realized that a new day was dawning.
Fin.
Please do let me know how you liked the ending. I imagine that some will be upset that Klaus didn't beg forgiveness. I don't believe he'd ever do that, because, well, everything he said to Caroline was true. While I wasn't happy that we finally got a Klaus love scene and it didn't include Caroline (and don't even get me started on how completely contrived the whole episode with Hayley was, grrr.), he didn't owe her any explanations for his actions. I tried very hard to draw the thin line between him knowing he hurt her and it not being any of her business. Hope that makes sense to you! Thanks again for reading and reviewing!
