Saturday, August 13, 2005
I remember you saying that growing up happens when you start having things you look back on and wish you could change. -Cassandra Clare, City of Ashes
"Edward, I need to breathe."
I let go, backing up until just my hands were on her shoulders.
"Are you serious? A car?"
"Yes, honey. It's all yours," she beamed at me. "Now your father helped pay for it, of course, and we both expect you to be smart about it. You'll need to pay for your own gas, and I'll give you a couple of months so you can save some money, but you'll need to take over the insurance-"
I cut her off with another hug.
I got my driver's license three days ago, and she'd already gotten me a car. Em and Gar were gonna shit bricks.
"Can I take it out now?"
She laughed as Carlisle came over and handed me the keys.
"Be responsible, Edward," she pleaded as I grabbed them from his hand.
"Thank you!" I replied giddily as I flew through the house, down the steps and out the door where a beautiful, little, silver car sat in the driveway next to my mom's jeep. She came out after me, still laughing with Carlisle and Vicky trailing close behind.
"Mom, can I go out with Edward and his friends?"
I turned and pointed.
"Vick, I'll take you out later. I need to go to the store to grab some, uh... Chips."
Victoria was ten and going through a phase where she wanted to follow me everywhere I went. It was borderline impossible to get her to leave me alone.
"Chips, Edward?" Mom knew I was lying. I gave her a pleading look and she rolled her eyes.
"All right. Go and get your chips. But you'll be keeping that promise to take your sister out."
"I will, I swear. Bye, guys."
I unlocked the car and hopped inside. I stuck the key in the ignition and took a few seconds to enjoy the quiet purr of the engine. My engine. A knock on the window startled me. When I saw Carlisle's face staring at me through the glass I rolled the window down.
"What's up?"
He looked behind him. My mom and sister had already gone back inside so he leaned in and spoke quietly.
"I know you don't like talking to him more than you have to, but your mother confided in me that she hopes you would call your father and thank him."
I sighed and leaned back on the headrest.
"She just wants you to have a relationship with the man, Edward."
I scowled while keeping my eyes on the steering wheel.
"Yeah, well, maybe if he didn't ditch his family for a new one, we'd be best friends."
Carlisle nodded and reached in to put a hand on my shoulder.
"You know I agree with you, but your mom's heart is in the right place. It's just too big sometimes." He looked back at the house with a soft smile. "Just do it for her then, yeah?" He looked back down at me and cocked an eyebrow with that I-mean-business look he's perfected after almost two years of putting up with my bullshit.
"Yeah, okay."
He squeezed my shoulder.
"Tonight or tomorrow. Get it done."
I watched him stroll back toward the house. He looked a little ridiculous in his loafers and flowery swim trunks but I had to hand it to the guy. He really loved my mom.
I faced forward and focused back on the task at hand.
I drove to Garrett's first, walking quickly to the front door and knocking. It took a few seconds for his mom to come carry out her usual non-greeting, but when she did I braced myself for the discomfort I felt every time I was there.
She looked at me without saying a word before yelling back into the house.
"GARRETT."
I wasn't spared a second glance as she left the door open and walked away. Used to this kind of treatment from her, I stepped inside and waited for Garrett at the bottom of the stairs. The sounds from the trashy soap opera she was watching blasted in from the other room. The entire house smelt like a mixture of cigarettes and macaroni and cheese.
"Edward? What are you doing here?"
I looked up to see him coming down the steps. He didn't really like ever having anyone over but this was news that I couldn't wait to tell him over the phone. I pulled the keys out of my pocket and dangled them in front of his face.
"Just giving you the chance to claim shotgun on the rides to school this year."
His eyes lit up.
"No shit?"
I grinned and turned around to walk outside with him following behind me. He laughed as soon as he stepped outside.
"Dude. Your mom bought you a Volvo?"
"Yeah, she did. And now you're riding in the back to Emmett's."
"Aw, man. Come on. You gotta admit, it's a pretty pansy ass car."
"Backseat. Now."
He sighed and got in the back. Then he grumbled for the whole two minutes it took to get the Swan's.
"Not cool, Ed," he muttered as he pushed the passenger seat forward to get out.
"Yeah, well, that'll teach you not to make fun of her, won't it?"
He snickered as he passed me and walked into the house where we found Emmett leaned forward on the couch watching The Sixth Sense. Garrett sat down next to him.
"Man, I thought this movie was so stupid. If that dude was supposed to be a ghost the whole time, don't you think he would have noticed that nobody but that kid ever talked to him? Come on."
Emmett's eyes bulged out of his head as he looked at Garrett.
"Bruce is a ghost?"
He looked over to me like I would tell him something different.
"Em, this movie came out like six years ago. I have no sympathy for you."
"Man, whatever." He grabbed the remote and turned the TV off. "What do you guys wanna do. People aren't coming over for like," he paused looking at the clock, "three more hours."
I mimicked the motion with my keys I'd done at Garrett's.
"I thought maybe we could go for a little joy ride."
Emmett looked confused before a big ass grin covered his face.
Two hours and a half a tank of gas later, we were driving back down Emmett's street and there were a bunch of cars already parked out front.
"I thought you said the party wasn't until seven, Emmett?" I asked, getting out of the car.
"Our friends aren't coming until seven. Bells is home though. She must have invited people over. Shit."
The chief was away with one of his fishing buddies for the weekend and it seemed that both of the Swan offspring had no problem taking advantage of his absence. They each had told me one time or another that when you're the child of a police officer, you tend to rebel a little more than the normal adolescent. I found it amusing that either of them thought he never found out about any of their parties.
We walked inside to find several Forks High School graduates, as well as some of the older kids from La Push. Not surprising since Bella had been seeing one of them for the past couple of months on and off. The guy was a total jerk off. Unfortunately Emmett and I were the only ones who thought so.
I walked into the kitchen to grab a soda and found her there. The giant douche had is arm around her until she saw me and walked over.
"Edward! What are you doing here?"
Emmett stepped in front of me before I could speak.
"Bell, I invited some people over, too."
She looked over him at me and I put my hands up in surrender. I wasn't having anything to do with this conversation. She shrugged and looked back at Emmett.
"Whatever. If any of your friends get too rowdy I'm going to have Jake throw them out. And you two better not be drinking," she said while pointing with two fingers at her own eyes and back at us. "I'm always watching."
She turned back around and walked over to Jake. He smiled down at her and kissed the top of her head at which point I spun around and resisted the urge to throw my soda can at his face. I knew realistically that she was never going to see me that way, but I couldn't help feeling jealous that there were others she actually was interested in.
"Like any of our friends would be afraid of a dude with a ponytail," Emmett grumbled next to me.
I walked out to the back porch and sat alone on the stairs. Their backyard wasn't very big, unless you counted the giant forest behind it. I sulked there by myself for who knows how long before Bella found me again.
"Edward, what are you doing outside by yourself?"
She sat down next to me.
"Just waiting for some people I actually know to get here."
She laughed and looked back towards the house.
"Yeah, I didn't mean for so many people to come over, but Jake invited some guys who invited some guys and well, here we are."
Hearing her say his name pissed me off even more.
"Yeah, what great guy."
Her eyebrows scrunched together and she opened her mouth to say something but then the backdoor flew open and her giant Native American boyfriend casted a huge shadow over the entire porch.
"Bells, what are you doing out here? The guys wanna play pong and I can't find the cups."
She looked at me strangely for a few seconds before she left me sitting there alone to go help him.
A few minutes later, Garrett came over to tell me people our age had started showing. Reluctantly, I got up and walked with him to see who else had been invited.
In true Emmett fashion, it was mostly girls, and it wasn't long before Garrett was stuck sitting in the living room with Ashley Dowling. She was best friends with Lauren and the two of them had been trying to get me and Garrett to ask them out since we won the last baseball game of the season back in April. The only problem was, that while Emmett will hook up with anything that moves, Garrett and I were pretty inexperienced. Neither of us had ever even had a girlfriend.
I felt a hand on my arm and turned around to see the exact girl I'd been thinking of.
"Hey, Lauren."
"Hi, Edward... Do you wanna maybe go out back and hang out for a while?"
Her blonde hair was down and wavy and she didn't use that lip gloss crap on her mouth anymore. She was wearing a tight grey t-shirt and jean shorts. I couldn't deny that she looked pretty. At that moment, Bella walked by with Jake. They sat on the couch and were whispering to each other, so close their foreheads were almost touching.
"Sure. Let's go."
Lauren smiled and wrapped her hand around mine, pulling me behind her until we'd reached the door to the backyard. I looked back once through the house. I couldn't see her anymore and I didn't need to. I decided right then that I had to quit stopping myself from liking other girls, because I had to face it. Bella was never going to be mine.
AN: I just wanted to thank everyone who has been giving my story a chance. Also, an even bigger thanks to those reviewing and the few lovely ladies who have rec'd my story on facebook. You guys are awesome. :)