So today is Thanksgiving, and everyone is at Giles' house to get ready for the meal. It is a little awkward because Xander is here too. Anya really wanted to come but told me she couldn't leave Xander alone on the holiday, and Willow asked me also. Since I had already decided to give him another chance, I told them yes. Tara came to join us as well, and she's getting along great with the group. Willow and Tara already knew each other because of the Wiccan group at school, and I think the attraction is still there. They keep giving each other looks, but Tara isn't the type to hurt someone or cheat. It makes me think more about if I'm wrong to keep them apart. I'm not really sure how to fix it though, I mean Willow definitely loves Oz and they're happy together. Maybe I can bring up the fact that there was definite sparkage between the two and see how Willow reacts?

Things look so different this year than they did the first time I lived through this day. There are more people here, because Oz is still here, along with Tara, and Dawn. Mom still had to go on that buying trip. Spike isn't tied up and looking deathly ill. I can't believe he was starving and we thought it was okay to eat a feast in front of him. Sometimes I look back at my actions regarding Spike and I feel nothing but disgust at myself. Don't get me wrong, he was no saint either, but still, he was supposed to be evil, and I was supposed to be the good guy. I definitely didn't always act like a good guy.

We weren't able to stop the Vengeance spirit from getting out, so Xander is still sick, but at least we know how to stop it this time. Spike, Dawn, and I are all just waiting for it to happen. I still had a run in with him last night, but he got away before I could get his knife off of him; I'll get it today. On top of that, I know Angel is coming today, hell, he might already be here for all I know. In fact…

"Hey, has anyone seen Angel in the last two days?" Both Giles and Willow look sheepish, so I give them my stern face, cross my arms, and start tapping my foot, clearly waiting for them to explain.

"I'm sorry Buffy, he was there when we were walking around last night and he told me it would be too hard for you to see him. He was asking what you were doing with Spike, though. I know you love him, so I agreed that it would do nothing but hurt you if you knew he was here since he was still going to leave when the spirit was taken care of."

"Quite right, I had a similar conversation with him too, I didn't want him to cause you any more pain, so I agreed to keep it quiet."

"Okay, I need you guys to listen to me now, I am the Slayer, you don't get to hide things from me. I've told you before, I have to trust the people on my team, and if I don't, well, then they won't be able to stay on my team for long. I'm a big girl, I can handle an ex coming to town. I keep finding out you guys are lying to me, and it makes me wonder if I still want to have friends like that. I really need you to stop, if I find out one more thing you guys are hiding from me, that will be the last straw. So I need you to think long and hard about any secrets you might be keeping." I look into the eyes of everyone in the room, and stay looking at Xander a few seconds longer than everyone else, I think he gets the point.

"I'm sorry Buffy, you're quite right. I knew I was making a mistake when I was agreeing with Angel, I don't know why I let him talk me into it," Giles says, at least admitting he was wrong.

"Buffy, I get why you're mad, but really, can you blame us? I knew you wouldn't handle it well if Angel came to town, he's the man you love…" She trailed off when it became clear that Spike was growling. I gave Spike a look, hoping to let him know that he has nothing to be upset over, because he is who I want to be with. I think it worked because he stopped growling, so Willow continued. "And I'm your friend, I'm allowed to make decisions like that if I'm trying to save you from pain," Willow finished, sounding confident that she was right, and that I would agree with her.

"Willow, that isn't the type of friendship I want, no one is allowed to make decisions about me other than myself. You might have all the best intentions in the world, but that doesn't mean that you are doing things for now for example, you thought you were doing what would be good for me, but in reality, you were doing the opposite of what was right for me. Don't get me wrong Willow, I depend on you guys for your opinions and help, I would be lost without it, but there's a difference between telling me what you think I should do, and doing it for me. Please tell me you understand that. Like I just said, I don't know if I want to be friends with someone that can't accept that."

"Buffy, you are overreacting, you have to know that right? Talking about ending our friendship over a secret? That is crazy."

I was flabbergasted by her ability to take the blame off of herself, and I was about to respond but before I could, something crashed through the window. Shit, I guess the Chumash spirit is here. Okay, Spike knows we have to get the knife away from him and Dawn knows to get everyone to a safe distance. The first punch I throw misses, and so does the second. Wow, I forgot how fast he is. The third hit though, that one lands.

"Buffy! Don't hurt him! He just wants justice for the wrongs done against his people." Is now really the time to fight about this, when the man is trying to kill me?

"Willow, seriously, we already talked about this, I can't let him keep murdering people. These people haven't done anything wrong, the people that hurt him have been dead for over two centuries!"

That sentence took a while to say because it was interspersed with punches and kicks. Finally, I got his knife from him, when Spike distracted him by punching him in the face. Then he turned into a bear, which I totally forgot happened.

"Bear! You made a bear!" Spike yelled as he took a few steps back. Huh, that sounds familiar.

"I didn't mean to."

"Undo it, undo it!"

I'm going to have to find out why he's so scared of bears. Finally, I got close enough to the bear when it set its sights on Spike, I was able to come up behind it without it even knowing I was there, and reach around and stab it in the heart. That was enough to end it. Thank god that's over, now it's time I deal with Angel, so I can get back to my Thanksgiving and enjoy it with my loved ones. I look outside and see him in the bushes trying to see what is happening inside. Ugh, now that I know that most of what I felt during this time was a claim that I didn't even know was there, I have no affection left inside me for him. I don't want him dead, but I'd be just as happy never to see him again. He has to learn that he isn't allowed to do things like he did today anymore. I walk a few steps, so I am directly in his line of site, and make sure to make eye contact with him, he tries to hide but realizes that I have already seen him so he decides to do that brooding 'My life is so hard, all I do is make sacrifices, so I'm going to brood about it' face. I point to the front of the house so he knows that is where I want him to go and start walking towards the front door.

"I'll be right back guys, I just have to have a word with Angel. Set the table, and get ready to eat dinner!"

As I'm walking out, I see Spike is looking uncomfortable. I can tell he doesn't like the fact that I'm going to go talk to Angel alone. It seems he still doesn't understand that I don't want anything to do with Angel and that he, Spike, is the man I love. So I walk right over and give him a kiss and head to the front door. I don't realize anything is wrong until I realize that everyone has stopped talking and it is completely quiet in the house. Shit, I forgot, most of the Scoobies don't know I'm dating Spike, well I guess they do now. Oh well, I'll deal with that when I get back inside. Although I do feel bad for what Spike is going to have to deal with while I'm outside. He'll probably say something like 'it's none of your bleeding business, mind your own' and walk away, so he'll be okay. When I get outside, Angel is just standing there making the face that used to make me melt, he's trying to look sheepish, sorry, loving, but not regretful all at the same time.

"What are you doing here Angel?" I could tell he was surprised by my abrupt tone.

"My seer had a vision that you were in danger. Of course I came to help, I couldn't let you just get hurt or worse."

"Next time, call me, and if it's so important that you have to come, don't you dare ever ask my team to lie to me again. Imagine if I did that to you, went to where you work, and told your underlings to lie to you because you weren't strong enough to handle your ex being there. They would never look at you the same."

"What? Buffy, of course, I'll come when you are in danger, a phone call won't be able to help, and I was just trying to save you from the pain of seeing me because I am going to leave now that I know you are okay."

"I feel no pain because you are here, and I'm happy that you are leaving."

"Buffy, why are you acting this way, I love you so much just like you love me, I was just trying to do what was best for you, what would help you."

"No Angel, you were trying to come in on your white horse and save the day, you knew that I would find out you were here one way or another, and you wanted me to think that you helped save me. Well guess what Angel, you will never be that person to me again, I know what you did and I will never look at you the same. Just go home and don't come back, if there's a problem that I need to know about, call me to let me know. Don't just show up, and don't tell the people that I rely on to lie to me, how on earth did you think that was okay?"

"What I did? Buffy, what are you talking about? What is wrong with you? And why were you so comfortable with Spike last night?" Oh my god, is he really bringing Spike up now? He's just trying to push the blame off on anyone other than himself.

"Two words, claiming bite." Since he is a vampire, it really surprised me that he could pale, but that's exactly what he did. He knows that I know what he did to me, and he had no intention to tell me either. I know that for a fact, hell, I lived it already.

"Buffy, h-how do you even know what a claiming bite is? Who bit you? Was it Spike? I'll kill him!" Oh, so he's going with lying, I know I shouldn't be surprised, but I am.

"Don't lie to me Angel, you know as well as I do that you are the one that claimed me. It's also most of the reason why it was so hard for me to get over you."

"Buffy, don't act like that, we can't get over each other because we are in love. I wouldn't do anything to hurt you, you know that. It was an accident, I didn't mean to claim you."

"Save it, Angel. I don't want to hear it, I am not yours and I never will be again. Next time your guy has a vision, there's this new cool invention called the telephone. Use it."

I don't give him a chance to dig his hole any deeper, I just turn around and walk back inside. I do see the look in his eyes before I turn though, he was baffled, surprised, and hurt. Right before I get inside, I stop at the front door and take a few deep breaths. Now I have to deal with the firing squad, they are going to make a huge deal over the fact that I kissed Spike. It won't matter to them that I'm happy, or that I finally have a partner in the slaying, someone to watch my back, it won't matter that he treats me great. None of that will matter because they will try to break us apart, if they can't do it with words, they'll do it with magic. We need to find some type of magic user that will give us some type of protection charm, actually, Tara might be the perfect person for that. Yeah, I'll ask Tara. So now that I have a plan of action, I take one more deep breath and open the front door and walk in like I own the place.

"Okay, who's ready to eat," I ask as I walk over to the oven, and grab the turkey. It's been done for a while, I was just keeping it warm in there. I walk back over to the table and put the turkey down, then go grab the things I need to carve it. I look up and realize people are just staring at me open-mouthed. I take a quick look over at Xander, he might not be my favorite person right now, but I still want to make sure he's feeling better since the spirit is gone. He still looks a little pale, but definitely better than he did earlier, so I think we're good. I look at Spike and ask "Have they been like this since I left?"

"That's right luv, well like this with random bits of dirty looks sprinkled in," Spike answers as he walks over and starts grabbing the sides of the dinner, at least someone is helping.

"Ugh come on guys, just say what you want to say."

No one really says anything, even though Xander looks like he wants to scream with anger, he just knows he can't, because I haven't even forgiven him yet for lying to me. They all slowly walk and take their seats, and all are making different faces, ranging from shock, disgust, jealousy, and everything in between.

"Okay, if no one wants to talk about it, then I'm going to enjoy my meal," I say as I start dishing out my meal and then passing the different serving plates to Spike. It stayed quiet while one by one the plates made their way around the table. Just as I was about to take my first bite, Giles decides he can't stay quiet any longer.

"Buffy, whatever game you are playing, it is time to stop now. There is absolutely no reason for you to be kissing William the Bloody, Slayer of Slayers. This joke has gone on quite long enough," Giles says as he cleans his glasses, and Xander nods his head enthusiastically, agreeing with him.

"I like them together, their auras look beautiful, they mix and swirl together perfectly," sweet shy Tara chimes in our defense. Willow doesn't look upset and neither does Oz. Dawn looks positively giddy, and Anya looks like she's imagining what orgasms between a vampire and a slayer would be like, hell, that's probably exactly what she's doing. The only people who are upset are Giles and Xander, smartly, Xander still hasn't said anything.

"Spike and I are together, there's no joke or game, just accept that and move on. I want to enjoy this meal before it gets cold, I've been cooking all day," I say and pick up my fork while Xander sputters but otherwise stays quiet, I have a feeling that won't last long though. After about five minutes of everyone eating in silence, I decide I'm sick of it, this is Thanksgiving damnit! I worked hard on this meal and it wasn't ruined by a vengeful spirit. I'll be damned if I let the guys in my life ruin it because I like making smoochies with Spike. "Willow, what did you think about that pop quiz in psychology? I think I did pretty good, honestly. I was surprised there weren't many questions I didn't know the answer to," I say, leading the dead conversation.

It was perfect because Willow looked excited and babbled on about how she loves the class and she thinks she aced the quiz. The conversation flows pretty smoothly for the rest of dinner, maybe a little strained, or at least, Giles and Xander are staying quiet, but everyone else is enjoying themselves. Just as Willow, Tara, and I sit back down, after getting the different pies for dessert, someone starts banging constantly on the door. Who could that be? I get up and walk over to the door and open it surprised to see Graham on the other side. He is one of the commandos and was one of Riley's best friends. Graham is the nicer of Riley's friends, but I don't even think we've said one word to each other in this timeline, since I haven't started dating Riley.

"Graham?" I ask, even though I didn't really mean to say it out loud.

"How do you know me?" He stops and shakes his head, like the answer isn't as important as what he's come here to talk to me about. "Doesn't matter, a few weeks ago, Riley told me about this girl he really thought he liked, then he had lunch with her and thought she was completely crazy. Apparently, she already knew about The Initiative, and what we work for, but according to her, the higher ups are doing more than learning about the HSTs, they're experimenting, and torturing them to build weapons and hopefully a super soldier. Riley thought she was insane but what she said made a lot of sense to me, so I decided to look into it myself and found out that she… You… were right. Our boss, your professor, has a secret project in a locked room not many can get into. They took a regular soldier and have been doing surgeries on him, making him into some human/hostile/robot thing. He also said that you are super strong and seem like you want to shut that down, is that true?"

Oh wow, It's okay Buffy, act surprised, like you don't already know everything he is telling you. I put on my best surprised face, and try to look properly horrified. What I remember about Graham, which admittedly isn't much, is that he isn't a bad guy, and he wasn't happy when he learned the truth about what is going on down there. He was totally loyal to the Initiative until he learned what was really happening, and he found out earlier in this timeline, so I don't think he's lying to me or trying to set me up. I take a step back and pull my arm back in invitation to enter the house. I learned the hard way to never actually use words to invite someone into a house. I look back at the group at the dinner table and can tell that they have heard everything that has been said so far, so at least I don't have to repeat myself.

"Did Riley tell you who I am, I mean what I am? What my calling is?" I say not answering his question yet, I might not think he is a bad guy, but that doesn't make him trustworthy either. Plus, I'd like to hear what other people think about this situation too. I told the scoobies what to expect when it comes to The Initiative when I told them about my slayer dream, so they might not know the details of what will happen if I don't stop it in time, but they know the basics of what is going on.

"He said that you are the Slayer but he doesn't really believe it, the Slayer is like the boogeyman for HSTs so he doesn't believe it exists. But I do, and I asked around about you and heard a lot, that you are one of the best and one of the strongest fighters on the good guy side. Originally, I wanted to get you to work with us, because I thought we were all on the same side, but with what I know now, I'm not so sure anymore. What Walsh is doing down there… well it's horrifying. I don't care if they're monsters, they're sentient beings, they have feelings and needs, but she doesn't care, she will operate on them while they're awake and do much worse..." He trailed off because there was a growling coming from somewhere in the room. I thought it was Spike because he was having flashes of the other Spike's life, so I was about to calm him down. Until I turned around and realized everyone was looking at me, and then I realized that I was the one growling, okay I definitely have to go talk to these Oracles tomorrow, this is not normal for me. So I force myself to stop, clear my throat, and then talk.

"Sorry, torture of any kind gets me angry. Anyway, why don't you have a seat? We are about to eat dessert and then we'll talk about the next steps," I say as I lead him to the empty chair. Once we're all sitting down, Spike puts his hand on my knee and rubs it. I guess he can tell I'm a little unsettled about the whole growly thing. I give him a small smile and then take a bite of my yummy pie.

"Right, so Graham was it?" Giles asks and at Graham's nod, he continues "What is your goal here? Are you trying to shut it down? Or are you trying to fix the problem from the inside? We need to know if we have the same goals before we can even consider working together." Graham looks distinctly uncomfortable with the question.

"I don't even know sir, all I know is I thought I was doing the right thing, helping the citizens, doing my duty, but then to find out I'm actually capturing and torturing creatures to build some type of Frankenstein monster, well I'm just not okay with that."

"Hey I know this might seem personal," I cut in before Giles can reply. "But do they give you pills every morning, and if so, are you sure of what you're taking? Are you stronger than you used to be?" Graham looks even more uncomfortable now.

"Y-yes, they do give us vitamins and those really help with speed, strength, and endurance."

"I would be careful about what you ingest, they've already proven that they are not afraid to experiment on their own people, you said it yourself, I'd be willing to bet that they aren't just regular vitamins."

"I can't work for a place that does things like that. I joined the army because every man in my family did, it was what was expected of me, and I wanted to make my family proud. They were when I told them I was chosen for a special mission. I thought I was doing good, I just don't know what to do now."

"Would you be willing to keep working there and be our inside man? Can you pretend that everything is okay for now? We are in the process of taking care of the problem, but it might take some time, and someone in there to tell us what is going on will go a long way. We won't ask you to do anything dangerous, just watch and report," Giles asks. Graham stayed quiet for a long while, I could tell this is a really hard decision for him. It's either be disloyal, when loyalty means so much to him, or continue helping do terrible things.

"Yes, I think I can do that," he finally replies.