Luka-

Waking up the next day was pleasant- fluffy sheets, the light of the sun streaming in from the window and warming me, soothing, unbroken silence… of course, this only lasted a few seconds before I realized I was still lying on Miku's bed, the place I had promised myself I'd only rest my head for a few minutes of guilty pleasure. Every inch of calm escaped me in one, sharp gasp as I scrambled around clumsily, displacing pillows and wrinkling already messy sheets. Miku had probably come home, and there was no doubt she'd found me, sound asleep in her room instead of my own. And if she had, why did she not try waking me up!?

Nervously, I opened the door and peered outside, like I was expecting Miku to be standing there, waiting for me with a suspicious look on her face. The apartment was quiet enough to have been completely empty, but still I stiffly made my way out the door on my tiptoes, ready to shamefully slink back to my room where I wouldn't be able to get any more sleep. Maybe Miku was already gone, and I could spend the rest of my day trying to find some sort of excuse of how I ended up asleep in her bed.

Sorry about that, Miku, I guess I forgot which room was mine!

As I crept back to my room, I caught a glimpse of green from within the sea of white in Miku's living room. I paused, frozen in place as I examined it from afar, still posed to take my next step. It was a wavy lock of teal hair peeking out from around the couch, silently beckoning me to come closer. Curiously, I gave in and quietly padded into the next room and slowly peered over the couch. Of course it was Miku, I shouldn't have been all surprised, but now that I was there, I couldn't look away.

Her head was tilted lightly to the side, and her limbs were sprawled about limply with one arm draped over the side of the couch, making her seem like a rag doll someone had tossed there and left behind. Her hair messily entangled her body, wrapping around her arms and the rest of her and falling in her face. Her expression was calm and innocent, not a single detail adding a bit of harshness. Eyes closed, lips parted- she was like sleeping beauty awaiting the kiss of her prince. If only I could wake her up with a kiss… if only I could be her prince.

While I quietly lost myself in my own, rose-tinted thoughts, I didn't notice at all that Miku had started to wake up until I heard her softly moan- a soft mewling that sent a shiver up my spine as it reached my ears. I jumped, putting a little more space between me and the couch so she wouldn't come to realizing I was hovering over her like I'd been watching her sleep (which I had been). But still, I could see her slowly waking, freeing her arms from her tangled hair and stretching them high into the air. Her entire body tensed and her brow furrowed a bit as she stretched the sleep from her body, from feet to finger tips. It was a captivating sight, and as she sat up and rubbed sleep from her eyes, I took the opportunity to check to see if I had drooled over having watched her. I'd seen her calming sleeping features, and now I got to see her slowly unfurl as she woke, like a flower opening its petals- so captivating were those brief moments that I completely forgot about my own shame. She'd fallen asleep on the couch because of me, I was sure of it.

"Good… morning…" She yawned, looking to me sheepishly before turning her attention to the cushions of the couch. Now that she had acknowledged me, she suddenly appeared much more demure than usual with reddened cheeks and a nervous frown on her face.

"I-I'm sorry!" I burst out, accompanying my words with a deeply apologetic bow. "There's no real excuse, I just… you see…" I didn't have anything to say on the matter that would make me seem like some sort of creepy stalker. I simply wanted to lie down in Miku's bed.

"Sorry for what?" Miku asked, casting a quick side glance my way. I stopped with my frantic stammering and straightened up, trying to make sense of things. At least from what she said, she didn't have any knowledge that I'd fallen asleep in her room. But, before I could even explain, Miku was quick to gasp and clumsily shuffle off the couch.

"U-Um…"

"Sorry, I just realized I need to get to the Crypton building!" She called over her shoulder as she stumbled to the bathroom. "Jeeze, I guess I overslept!" A light slam of the bathroom door and I was left in silence, left to confusedly wonder what had just happened. Miku had seemed visibly uncomfortable, unable to look me in the eye and the way she spoke seemed oddly stiff. The Miku who had been so friendly and open with me was no longer there. If it wasn't over my having slept in her bed, then what…?

There was nothing much more I could do other than amble around in a perplexed stupor as Miku awkwardly and quickly fumbled around with getting ready and going to great lengths to avoid crossing my path. She'd veer in one direction when we'd almost meet, suddenly have to get something when we met eyes, and even refused breakfast, excusing herself by saying she didn't have the time, and would eat at work. It hurt- probably more than she knew- but I refused to let it show. I pretended not to notice the obvious, glaring attempts to keep from going near me, and put on an understanding smile when she refused to even sit down and have a meal with me. Only when she had gone, tripping out the door and shouting a goodbye over her shoulder without turning to look me in the eye, did I show signs I was bothered.

Defeat overtaking me, I slumped down at the kitchen table, feebly trying to process what had just happened. My dream to meet my goddess had been made into reality, but now things weren't falling into place like I had always hoped. I wasn't an idol like her, someone who she could see eye to eye with… I wasn't even worthy of her gentle, overwhelming kindness that I had fallen in love with, and I hadn't the slightest idea why.

But I knew for certain my heart ached, no matter how lost I was about Miku's behavior. Every averted gaze and avoided contact dragged me down, and now I was sitting at her table, pathetically beginning to shed tears over something that had happened over the course of less than 20 minutes. Miku, my goddess- my role model- was rejecting me. It didn't matter why, all that mattered was that she was, and even the small dose of it hurt me more than I could bear.

I couldn't take not being able to touch her, or to share my feelings with her. Those things alone had begun to eat me up inside. But now, she was distancing herself from me and, I dare say, it threatened to drive me insane. Her rejection stung more than the one I had received the other day- much more so than any sort of rejection I received from anyone else. Having the one thing- the one person you love the most pull away…

Feeling tears drip down and splash onto my lap, I wondered to myself if I'd be able to take it anymore.

Miku-

Truth be told, I didn't have work that day. It was a rare kind of day I normally treasured where I could live like a regular person- no interviews, no recording sessions, no concerts… but I had to make an excuse to flee from my apartment, even if I felt horrible for it. Waking up to find Luka staring back at me made my heart unnaturally skip a beat as my brain forced me to remember the softness of her lips. I'm not blind, I realized how hurt she was, but I selfishly feared my own feelings more than hers as I ran out of the apartment.

As luck would have it, I knew of one other person who specifically requested Sundays off, and she was the only person I could confide in- at least, about my feelings. Luka was probably back at the apartment, worried, saddened and very willing to listen, but I dared not tell her about the feelings that were building in my heart- that were starting to suffocate me. Chances are, even if I tried to tell her, I wouldn't have the air for the words.

I waited impatiently for my ride, sitting in my usual spot, just out of sight of the main entrance near the elevators. Craning my neck, constantly catching glimpses of cars, thinking they were for me, I fidgeted in my seat. It wasn't that I needed to take anything in, but more like I needed to let something out, and the longer I waited and let those words gestate inside of me, the more nervous I became. I can honestly say I've never even felt that nervous about a concert or an appearance on any kind of show. I wasn't going to go out and sing the usual thing to a crowd of adoring fans, after all. What I was about to let slip from my lips in front of my designated audience today was something I never would have dreamed I would do- and, for once, I began to feel the old, long-dead feeling of stage fright.

The distant sound of a honking horn brought me out of my terrified trance, and I tore my attention away from the floor tiles not to see the usual Crypton car that took me to and from work, but a flashy, red convertible, belonging to a person who had long since stopped worrying about attracting attention to herself. My driver waved, as if she saw me through the glass and her shades before hailing me again with another honk of her horn. I sighed, finding solace that, at least, Meiko was enthusiastic to meet me on her day off. She was the only person I could turn to, and I was more than grateful she was willing to listen to my problems off the clock.

"Could you put the roof up?" I immediately asked her as I ungracefully let myself into her car and motioned urgently to the roof of her car that was currently folded up behind us. I could already feel the wayward glances of people and could hear my name even in the smallest, surprised whispers. Of course, my usual fear of a mob forming was usurped by the fact I legitimately wanted privacy. What I was about to confess to Meiko was not for any other person's ears.

"How come? It's a beautiful day." Meiko smiled before she pushed her glasses up onto her forehead and realized I probably looked like I was about to hurl all over the nice, leather interior of her car.

"Goodness, you don't look so good, Miku."

"Please, just put the hood up!" I pleaded, refusing to say anything else until, with a concerned sigh, Meiko gave into my request, and put a barrier between us and any other people within earshot. And once it was up, my walls that had already begun to crumble came tumbling down. There were so many things I wanted- needed to tell Meiko, but the instant I had the opportunity to finally get everything off my chest, a warm lump grew in my throat, choked my words, and replaced them with depressed moans and gasps of air.

"I'm sorry!" I managed to apologize as I slowly leaned forward, hiding my face with my hands and resting my forehead against my knees as I sobbed. "I-I…"

Everyone says love is supposed to make you unbelievably happy, but now that it had made a home inside my heart, all I could do was cry. Maybe it was because I knew I'd never be able to have those feelings returned, or the liberty to even express them. Love was forever doomed to remain inside me, starve, die and rot. Love for my fans was different, it was a compassion I could express in songs, and they all seemed to love me unconditionally. With Luka, it seemed, there was no way to express how I felt now that I was sure of my feelings, and it more than simply frustrated me- it was breaking me.

Of course, Luka's sad expression she wore as I left the apartment before was burned inside my memory, so much that I could see it even through the blur of tears or with my eyes tightly shut.

"Miku…" Meiko sighed, but not sounding at all bothered as she reached out and gently rubbed my back with one of her warm hands. "This wouldn't happen to be about what you talked to me about the other day, would it?" A small shudder ran through me before I turned my head slightly- just enough so I could meet the concerned gaze of my older coworker. The way she looked back at me- like a mother horribly worried for her child- forced me to tell the truth, and I responded with a wavering gaze and a guilty nod. I wasn't sure what to expect from her in response, but I felt a twinge of relief when Meiko lightly smiled down at me as she moved her hand from my shivering back to my hair that she lovingly ruffled.

"Well, let's not talk about it here." She said soothingly, resting both hands on her steering wheel after putting her car in drive. "We can discuss it over tea at my place." She looked to me for my approval, and though I still didn't have the voice to respond I nodded again, choking back a sob before burring my face back into my knees. I could only hope at that point that Meiko and all her wisdom had something to share with me that would help me overcome my heartache.

Luka-

I had the newspaper spread out before me, but even though I was focused on it, I couldn't even find the will to read the words. I'd gotten as far as actually going and picking one up, but that somehow had spent me for the day. Each time I tried to find a possible lead- an opening in a talent agency of some sort- my mind would immediately remind me of Miku, no matter how hard I tried to distract myself. Maybe it was because there was a full-color ad for her upcoming concert that took up an entire page in the paper, maybe it was because my heart was still overflowing with hurt and longing, but whatever it was, it was hindering my progress more than I'd like to admit.

Also open was my phone, the glowing screen displaying Miku's number. There'd been several times where I'd almost done it- I'd draw in a sharp, preparatory breath and hover my shaking thumb over the call button. However, each time, I'd only heavily sigh and set it back down on the table to aimlessly stare at the newspaper.

I wanted to be an idol so bad when I'd arrived. Every inch of me wanted to reach that pinnacle of achievement so that, one day, I'd be able to meet my goddess (who was currently looking back at me with a wide, enthusiastic grin from the concert ad, her beauty unfazed even by the graininess of the image). But maybe I'd met her too soon. My end goal had shown itself the day I'd arrived, and now, she was drawing away from me. What was the point of being an idol now? Had it really all been for her?

The hot sting of tears consumed me as I grasped angrily at the thin paper, crumpling up both the help wanted ads, as well as the ad for Miku's concert. A furious grunt escaping me, I threw the now wadded up newspaper to the floor, partially unsatisfied by how it only lightly drifted to the ground and weakly bounced away.

Why, even then, did my heart still yearn for the one thing that was drifting further and further from my reach? My heart still fluttered as much as it ached over the very thought of her. Maybe, it seemed, I'd made her such a large part of my life that she had left a permanent mark on me- a hideous, throbbing scar on my heart that I more than willingly allowed her to carve into me. I wished I could tell her- blame her for the ache in my chest. I went through so many scenarios in my head, but they all ended with her backing away from me.

"Luka… we're both girls… it could never…"

The door suddenly swinging open tore me from my thoughts, and I had to turn around to hide my teary eyes and quivering lips.

"W-welcome back!" I hoarsely announced, expecting Miku to be behind me. Though, she hadn't left too long ago- was she already done with work? Imagine my surprise when a whole different voice answered my greeting. It was much younger and high-pitched, maybe even a little grating in comparison to the melodic voice I'd expected to hear.

"Eeh? Who are you?" With a jump, I whirled back around, coming to find a whole other idol standing in Miku's doorway: the tween pop singer, Kagamine Rin, curiously without her twin who I'd never seen her without, whether it be in magazines or on television. She gave me a questioning look, hands on her hips as she scanned me up and down like I was some kind of intruder. Her pouty lips formed a suspicious half-frown and I found myself trying to come up for a reason why I was there and why it was obvious I'd been crying. It all really added up to me just stumbling over my words and trying to wipe my tears away clumsily.

"I'm… I'm not an intruder, I promise!" I finally burst out, hoping that adding volume would add to how sincere I sounded. "I'm only staying here for a little while! Miku, she-" A sharp, mocking snort cut me off, followed by a rather mischievous laugh from the younger blond girl.

"Wow, Miku never mentioned her friend who was staying with her was such a spazz." Rin chuckled, hand over her mouth. "Don't worry, I know you're not intruding- Miku told me all about you, after all."

"She… did?"

"Sure she did, Miku tells me everything- I mean, we are like best friends." Rin shrugged as she lazily kicked off her white, sequined canvas shoes and welcomed herself into the apartment. "Where is she, anyway? She promised we'd go out for cake today!" She curiously craned her neck around, as if Miku was hiding somewhere in the apartment. Before I even had a chance to speak, Rin had already began peering around corners and barging into rooms.

"She's probably at the Crypton building- it sounded like she had some work she had to get done." I explained, kicking the crumpled up newspaper out of view while Rin was looking away. Poking her head from around a corner, she gave me a confused look, like I'd said something horribly cryptic.

"Work?" She questioned. "Today's her day off- it always is. If there was something urgent she had to do, she could have called me to tell me so."

"O-Oh?" I stammered, feeling as if the floor had vanished from beneath my feet. If she wasn't at work, where was she then? And for that matter, why had she felt the need to lie to me? Her seemingly important appointment at work being a fabrication made that morning seem that much worse, and made her discomfort being around me that much more profound. Not only was she pulling away, but she had lied just so she could get out of the apartment. "How odd…" I was close to breaking down right then and there, even if Rin was right there in front of me.

"Well, Miku's always been known for her lying." Rin sighed, flipping her hair and looking a touch exhausted as she began to make her way back towards the door. "Sorry to have bothered you, I guess. And I don't sign autographs off work, if you were going to ask."

Without thinking, as she passed me by, I'd reached out and grabbed her tightly by the wrist. Rin was a tiny little thing, and a famous idol at that, so I immediately saw I was probably in the wrong, as a stranger in her best friend's (as it were) house. She even gave me a rather offended glare, confirming my worries, and tried to pull her hand away from me.

"Hey!" She snapped. "What's the big idea, huh!?"

"I-I'm sorry… I just… Please, could you tell me more about Miku!?" I asked her, having to bellow over her own, loud, protests. "I just… I feel I hardly know her, even though we're under the same roof. She's my role model- my inspiration… I… I…" Despite myself, my vision began to blur from tears, no doubt confusing and frustrating Rin even further.

As open as she seemed, Miku was secretive. There was so much I wanted to know about her, but never would know. And here, standing before me, was someone who could shed some light on my goddess who chose to shroud herself in mystery. I was desperate, like a drug addict looking helplessly for even the tiniest little fix. I wanted to know Miku before she pulled away from me completely, while my feelings for her still ran like a welcomed poison in my veins.

Miku… you never tell me anything!

"Why in the world should I tell you anything, huh? Miku's had enough with the paparazzi as it is, why should I suddenly just tell you about her?" She snarled quizzically. "She's been through enough crap, you know?"

"Because…" I began, holding back a words only a second before they came bursting out of me, as if they now possessed a will of their own. "…I love her!"