Washed Up
A/N: logs have finally caught up to real time, as of now, we're still in the middle of writing new ones, so expect slower updates.
Authors: Celianna (Momo, Hazue) & Happiestwhen (Kaidoh)
Rating: K+
Events leading up to this log:
- Momo slept in Kaidoh's bed once more
- Hazue's birthday isn't known, so I set it to October 4.
Date: October 4, 2012
"Happy birthday!" Momoshiro throws fake confetti (shredded paper flakes) into the air, which lands on top of Hazue's head.
"Uhh," Hazue says. He's a bit perplexed, standing awkwardly at the entrance of Kaidoh's and Momoshiro's hut.
"Come on in, come on in!" Momoshiro slides an arm around Hazue's shoulders and pulls him inside of their hut, where he and Kaidoh had been waiting for the younger boy to show up. But today, he turns into a man, an eighteen year old one.
Hazue gives a tiny little wave at his brother Kaidoh, who is sitting down at the makeshift table at the center. On top of the table is a plate with a little cupcake. It has a candle stuck in the middle of it. Hazue guesses that's his birthday cake. Momoshiro forces him to sit down on the opposite side of Kaidoh, and he eagerly sits on the side. Hazue feels a bit shy with all the attention he's getting, and clenches his fingers around the hem of his shirt; it's a habit when he's feeling nervous.
Kaidoh gives his brother a small smile.
"Happy birthday," he says. He knows this island probably isn't the ideal place to spend his birthday, so Kaidoh wants to do his best to make it a good and memorable day for him. He's even skipped his training—reluctantly, but it's only one day out of the year, and he'll make up for it tomorrow. Besides, Hazue had said he wants to do things together today, and maybe that will include some running. That's how Kaidoh spent his birthday this year, after all.
"Thank you," mumbles Hazue bashfully. "I'd have liked to spend it with mom and dad too though," he says.
Momoshiro leans over to mess up Hazue's hair. "Cheer up—you're both alive at least. You'll see them soon again."
Hazue manages to feel a little relieved at that. "Yeah, I guess that's true." He certainly doesn't want to spend his entire life running on the beach and eating fish. "So uhm, is this cupcake for me?" He points at it.
"Cake," Momoshiro corrects him. He slips his hand into the pocket of his shorts and pulls out his zippo lighter (which he has gotten quite dependent on). He lights the small blue candle on the cupcake, then sits back and brims at Hazue, waiting for him to blow it out.
"Well, go on, blow it out!" Momoshiro urges him.
Hazue chuckles, before leaning over the crate, puckering out his lips and blowing at the candle. The flame wickers, before it sizzles out. He looks up at Kaidoh with a smile on his face. Perhaps he'll get some presents? Not that he could get any real good presents … but if Momoshiro can get rainbow roses, Hazue expects something better than simply cake.
Kaidoh's cheeks go a little pink and he reaches behind himself to pull something out and slide it across the floor to his brother. Momoshiro lets out a snort when he sees, and Kaidoh glares at him, before looking back at Hazue and saying, "I made you a set of dumbbells. They're just like the ones I have, but now you can have your own so you won't have to always borrow mine when you want to train."
Not that Hazue has ever really asked to borrow them. But maybe he just felt uncomfortable doing so since they were Kaidoh's … Well, he doesn't need to anymore. And his brother has been training on his own, he even posted to his journal about it! So Kaidoh's sure he'll appreciate the gift. At least he hopes he will. He looks at Hazue expectantly.
Hazue looks at the coconuts fastened on a stick with a look of horror in his face. He quickly turns away and covers his face with his hand, pretending to be happy.
"T-thank you," he manages to say. Great. More training. Hazue doesn't know if he'll survive as much as Kaidoh wants him to train, but he really doesn't have it in him to go against Kaidoh's wishes either. Not after the storm, and putting his brother into danger because he lied his way out of training. That won't happen anymore. That, and Kaidoh looks really happy, and he doesn't want to make him sad by not liking his present.
Hazue slides it over to his side, and puts it beside himself. It looks like one big joke, but he knows Kaidoh is humourless, so he tries to smile at him. "I hope it won't break." He hopes it does.
Momoshiro huffs out loud to get his attention. "I told him not to give it to you. Come on Kaidoh, can't you give your little brother something better? Those dumbnuts are stupid as hell."
"Shut up," Kaidoh growls, "no they aren't." He looks to Hazue for reassurance. They aren't stupid. Momoshiro is stupid.
Hazue thinks they're stupid. "No, they're fine. You're very crafty." He hopes by paying compliments to Kaidoh's tendency to make things, it'll divert attention to the fact he doesn't want to train at all.
"Well, I think they're still stupid. Stupid dumbnuts. Can't you make something else? Give him a bandana, hehe."
Kaidoh grimaces. What kind of suggestion is that? He's never seen Hazue wear a bandana. Does his brother even like them? Kaidoh realizes he's never actually asked. Just like he never asked his brother if he liked running as much as he did, just assumed he would.
"Do you, uh, want a bandana?" he asks hesitantly, then before his brother can answer, Kaidoh volunteers, "I'll make you one if you like."
This time Hazue's eyes light up, and he nods his head up and down. "Yeah! A cool blue one! Can I have my name sewed in it too, I know you can do things like that … hope it's not too much trouble." After all, Kaidoh already gave him a present—albeit one he doesn't like—he shouldn't be giving him more. He bashfully reaches for the cupcake and breaks a piece off, stuffing it into his mouth.
"Oh, so you can sew names," says Momoshiro, and he looks pointedly at Kaidoh. His eyes saying; so you could have sewn in Momo-chan in mine.
Kaidoh shrugs. "Of course I can sew names," he replies, narrowing his eyes at Momoshiro. "It's not like it's hard." He returns his gaze to his brother and his eyes soften, because Kaidoh's actually really happy that his brother seems so enthusiastic about the idea. He likes seeing Hazue excited about things, especially something Kaidoh likes, like bandanas.
"I'll make you a really nice one," he promises.
"No rush or anything," says Hazue, not wanting to burden his brother. "But thank you, I'll really treasure it! And uhm," he looks at the coconuts, "those too. I will use them … sometime. Maybe after I've run." Which would be never, hopefully. Though Hazue has been running, which was his way of making up to his brother that he lied to him about his ankle.
"Well if you're going to do that, I want my name on mine too," says Momoshiro, feeling left out. "Since it already says Momo, just add the chan part after it."
"It's not your birthday," Kaidoh grumbles at him.
"It was before! All I got was a fake cake."
"You've had a real one since then," Kaidoh points out. "And you got a hammock." He glances awkwardly at his brother, hoping Hazue doesn't want one of those too, since it kind of took a lot of work to put together—and Hazue already managed to build one of those himself.
Hazue simply stays quiet; he's gotten a bit used to their quarreling. Though the insults, he probably could never get used to hearing those come out of his brother's mouth. He simply continues to eat the pretty decent cupcake on his own, completely quiet.
"So what, that wasn't a birthday cake, besides, we made it together, so that doesn't count as a gift. And sure, I have the hammock, but I asked for my name! And burgers. But since I don't have burgers, I want my name. Shouldn't be too hard, it's only a few letters." Momoshiro's been wanting his name stitched into the bandana for months now. If Hazue is getting his, then, well, Momoshiro wants his too! It's just so unfair. Stupid Kaidoh.
Why is he acting so nice to his brother anyway, why can't he act this nice and accommodating to Momoshiro?
Kaidoh looks down at the floor of the hut and then huffs.
Maybe it's because Hazue is here and it's his birthday and it would be rude to fight, or maybe it's because Momoshiro's simply getting better at wearing Kaidoh down and making him bend to his every whim, because Kaidoh says, "Fine, whatever." Stupid Momoshiro can be so demanding … But it's not like Kaidoh's doing anything to discourage it.
"If I have time …" he adds dismissively, lips pulling into frown. It seems like a pointless thing to say, a futile effort to sound less agreeable. They both know Kaidoh has the time.
"Alright!" Momoshiro cheers. He throws a fist into the air, before he points it at Kaidoh; he deserves a fistbump.
Kaidoh rolls his eyes but his hand moves on instinct and bumps Momoshiro's fist. Even if it's for something stupid, he's not going to leave him hanging.
Then he looks back at his brother, who's just been sitting there quietly and patiently, with his cake, probably similarly annoyed that Momoshiro had to go and whine selfishly about presents for himself. It's Hazue's birthday after all.
"Okay, enough about Momoshiro," Kaidoh says, throwing a cursory glare at Momoshiro as he mentions him before returning his gaze to his brother. "What do you want to do today?"
"Uhm, uhh." Hazue feels put on the spot. He hadn't really thought about what he'd do, as long as he was doing it with Kaidoh he'd be fine with anything. Well no, that's a lie, as long as it doesn't include training, then Hazue will be fine with anything else.
"How about, uhm, going to see someplace nice? Or just walk around a bit, exploring areas we haven't been to yet." Though Hazue doubts Kaidoh hasn't run all around the island by now, he should know pretty much everything by now.
"Sounds good to me!" says Momoshiro.
"Yeah, okay," Kaidoh agrees. He wants to suggest that they jog around a bit instead, but it's Hazue's choice, and if he wants to walk then that's fine too. Kaidoh won't make him do anything he doesn't want to do on his birthday.
"Great, but let's not walk too far, I don't want to get us lost or anything," say Hazue. He bashfully continues to eat the rest of the small cupcake.
"Hey, hey, Kaidoh." Momoshiro nudges his knee which is right next to him in his reach. "Let's take him to Dumbnuts Cove instead. He hasn't been there yet. And it's cool!" Though the reason why he hasn't been there yet, is that it was basically Kaidoh's and Momoshiro's 'secret' spot. Or something like that. But it's Hazue's birthday, he should be getting to see something exciting.
"Dumbnuts ... cove?" Hazue repeats slowly.
"That's just what Momoshiro calls it," Kaidoh says flatly. "It's pretty nice though, yeah."
"What do you mean that's just what I call it," Momoshiro throws back at him. "It's what we both call it." Momoshiro named it, and Kaidoh didn't have any objections to it.
Kaidoh scowls, wanting to bat Momoshiro in the shoulder for insisting on giving everything a stupid name, but he stops himself, because it would be impolite to fight in front of his brother on his birthday.
Instead he just shrugs and says, "Whatever," then looks at Hazue and adds, "But anyway, it's not that far from here."
"Yes, come on, let's get out of this boring hut." Momoshiro gets up, being really enthusiastic about the entire proposal, and simply dashes out of the hut before anyone else can get a word in.
Hazue stares at the entrance as a small piece of cake falls out of his open mouth. He clears his throat and looks back to Kaidoh. "I guess, we should follow?" he suggests.
Kaidoh nods. "Yeah, let's go." He stands up and toes the table with his sneaker. "Do you want to run there?"
"Uh, uh." Quick, think of an excuse, Hazue—you can do it! "Why don't you go run alone with Momo-nii-chan? He seems eager to run, and it gives you two something to do again." There, play on Kaidoh's feelings for Momoshiro, totally legit and fair.
"Uhh…" Kaidoh stutters. He knows what happens when he's alone with Momoshiro and it isn't exactly something he can say out loud. Ever. Especially not to his brother.
"No, that's okay," he says. His face suddenly feels a little warm so he quickly adds, "Because it's your birthday after all. I'd rather spend time with you. Come on, we can just walk it. It's not that far."
Hearing his big brother say he wants to spend time with him makes Hazue break out into a smile. It looks rather uncharacteristic on a Kaidoh's face—they naturally look rather scary—but Hazue is not one to hide his smiles. He nods at his brother before he eats the rest of the cake and stands up.
"Alright, let's go follow Momo-nii-chan then," then with a laugh he adds, "if he isn't there already. He looks rather excited for it not being his own birthday."
Kaidoh snorts. "Yeah, he's an idiot," he says, but his tone is more fond than annoyed. He heads to the doorway and waits for his brother to follow. He can see Momoshiro in the distance, halfway down the beach already.
Hazue follows, going out and down the steps, walking into the sand alongside his brother. This is actually kind of nice. When he's not being forced to run for hours. He still looks up to his brother, after all. He certainly has a kind of determination that he hasn't seen in anyone else. And now he's here, spending time on Hazue's birthday. It makes him happy.
It also makes Hazue happy to see Kaidoh being more relaxed around other people. Other people referring to Momoshiro of course (he hasn't really seen Kaidoh with anyone else, he wonders why that is). But then again, it's because Kaidoh likes him, so obviously he's going to give him special treatment. Hazue wants to help his big brother out in this regard.
"Did you do any more runs with Momo-nii-chan after that one time?" Hazue asks with a big knowing smile on his face.
Kaidoh stuffs his hands into his pockets as he starts walking. "No … um, I haven't gone running with him." It's a true statement but for some reason Kaidoh feels like he's telling a gigantic lie. He kicks up a clump of sand as he walks. "The weather's pretty nice today, huh," he observes, straining to find something else to talk about.
"Doesn't that mean today's a good day to ask Momo-nii-chan for another run?" Meaning not him. He can help his brother and get out of running. Two birds with one stone!
"I don't know," Kaidoh says, feeling his face heat up again. He glances over at his brother who's walking beside him and looking up at him hopefully. Maybe if he agrees then Hazue won't ask any more questions about Momoshiro, because Kaidoh would really like to stop blushing.
Anytime now. That would be great.
"Yeah, maybe," he agrees.
"That's great! You should definitely ask him then. See, I told you he'd agree if you'd ask, wasn't I right?" says Hazue in an excited voice.
Kaidoh gives his brother a slight smile in return, like he's trying to appease him, and then turns to look ahead of him again. "I … I guess so," he says dismissively, because this isn't the kind of conversation that comes easy for him.
Momoshiro who had been running ahead, finally turns around to see if he's actually being followed. He sees the Kaidoh brothers walking towards him at their own leisure. He waves at them, trying to get them to hurry up. He sees Hazue wave back, to which he rolls his eyes; he isn't saying hello, he's saying walk faster. He turns back around and starts walking again.
"Have you … you know, tried anything else besides running with him?" Hazue asks innocently. He could be doing other things with Momoshiro as well. Like fishing or cooking or something.
Kaidoh's cheeks burn. "What?! No. No …" He unconsciously starts walking faster like he's trying to escape. "Nothing," he says firmly. Biggest lie in the world. Kaidoh glares at Momoshiro's back up ahead, because somehow this is his fault for leaving him alone with his brother and all these weird questions.
Hazue tries to keep up. "Oh that's okay, no need to be embarrassed about it. It'll take time, I guess. Have you tried something like cooking together? Or perhaps fishing together? Those kind of things means you can spend more time together."
"Oh ... yeah," Kaidoh replies, sounding distracted. "That kind of stuff. Sure, we do things like that sometimes." He huffs, then adds in what he hopes is a casual tone, "And well, we share a hut so I guess that's ... spending time together." He wonders if he sounds at all convincing.
Suddenly Hazue's ears burn with red. He looks down at the sand and clenches his t-shirt with his hands, feeling completely awkward all of the sudden. "Oh. You mean privately. Y-yeah, that's ... spending time together … uhm ... yeah." Maybe his brother wasn't as innocent as he thought?
Kaidoh looks equally horrified and sputters a little before he's able to speak, all his defensive instincts kicking in.
"Don't say it like that! That... We don't... No! I meant I have to see him all the time since he lives in my hut. I didn't mean ..." He turns his head and hisses. He can't say what it was he didn't mean, because it's not something he can say out loud. It's not really something he even wants to think about. But now he's sort of stuck on it. Which is mortifying. Hazue's interrogation is making it hard for Kaidoh to focus on other things.
"Didn't mean …?" Hazue echoes, a bit curious. But he quickly drops the issue. "Seeing someone is not the same as spending time together. You talk to him, right? I'm sure you two have loads to talk about!"
Kaidoh shrugs. "Of course I talk to him." Although it's often just Momoshiro rambling about something stupid and Kaidoh interjecting with an insult every now and then but that counts. Probably. At any rate, he still talks to Momoshiro more than other people.
Except for where their whole weird thing is concerned. They don't talk about that at all.
"Well," Kaidoh adds, looking hesitantly at his brother, "I don't talk to him about everything ... But I don't have to, right?" Maybe there's some kind of rule about spending time with people that Kaidoh doesn't know about.
"Well, no you don't have to, but …" Hazue looks at Momoshiro's retreating back. "Talking to someone you like about various kinds of things is fun and exciting …" He looks at Kaidoh this time.
"Don't you want to know more about Momo-nii-chan?" Not that Kaidoh didn't already have enough information about him (Hazue knows of his 'habit' concerning Momoshiro), but finding things out through general conversation is always a good thing.
"Yeah," Kaidoh admits. But Kaidoh isn't really the type to just come out and ask questions. If he's curious about something he usually expresses it with indifference, maybe even outright annoyance. Starting conversations is not Kaidoh's strong point. Neither is steering them toward specific topics.
He looks down at his shoes which are sinking into the sand as he walks along. "But I'm not really that great at ..." He trails off, grasping for words. "... talking about things." Great, he can't even seem to talk about talking.
Hazue shrugs with a chuckle. "I guess with Momo-nii-chan around, that doesn't seem to matter much. But you should definitely try! Ask him how his day went, or perhaps if he would like something for dinner, or if he's sleeping alright—wasn't he complaining he was cold a few days ago—or even ask him what he does for a hobby." Or perhaps ask him if he has a girlfriend. That's something Hazue doesn't know about either, and it's a pretty important fact. So he nudges Kaidoh softly in his side.
"Have you asked … if he has a girlfriend already?"
"G-girlfriend?" Kaidoh repeats. He hadn't thought about it until just now but his brother has a point ... What if Momoshiro is dating someone? What if there's some girl waiting for him back in Japan? What then?
"I don't ... I don't know if he does," Kaidoh says. Momoshiro's never mentioned a girlfriend, but there are a lot of things he doesn't mention so maybe it's just another weird secret.
He doesn't think Momoshiro has a girlfriend ... He'd better not ... Just the thought of it makes Kaidoh kind of want to punch Momoshiro in the face and he screws his mouth into a grimace.
"Oh …" Hazue hangs his head down. "That's kind of important to know if you want to … you know." He doesn't want to outright say it, but yeah, he means being together with Momoshiro. If Momoshiro has a girlfriend waiting for him back in Japan, that means all hope is lost. That, and Momoshiro kind of needs to be gay too. Well, Hazue is hoping for the best.
"You should ask him that first before you do anything else … it'd be a bit weird to try anything if he's already in a relationship with someone else."
Kind of late for that, Kaidoh wants to say. Why hadn't he thought about this before? Why hadn't it ever even occurred to him? It makes him feel kind of sour and annoyed and sick to his stomach.
But Momoshiro wouldn't just do those things with Kaidoh if he had a girlfriend waiting for him ... Right? He's an asshole but he's not that kind of asshole. At least, Kaidoh doesn't think so. But even his attempts to reassure himself leave him feeling on edge. He needs to find out.
But he can't just walk up to Momoshiro and demand an answer. "That's kind of a strange question to just ask ..." he thinks out loud, "after all this time ..." And all the things that have happened.
"All the more reason to ask him, Kaoru-nii-chan. Just, uhm, start up a conversation about what you'd do if you'd get back home. Ask him if he's got someone waiting for him. That sounds good, right? You don't have to outright ask him … I don't think so."
"But that sounds like ..." Like Kaidoh cares about what Momoshiro does once they get off this island. And he does. He doesn't want to just part ways again and go back to the radio silence he'd never gotten used to these past five years.
But saying that outright sounds embarrassing. Even suggesting it seems weird. And Kaidoh definitely doesn't want to sound like he's jealous of whatever hypothetical girlfriend Momoshiro might have.
Because Kaidoh doesn't want to be Momoshiro's girlfriend. Gross.
He looks at his brother, his face a mess of confused emotions. "I can't."
"Uhh … do you want me to ask then?" Hazue helpfully suggests. He knows his brother probably wouldn't have the guts to even ask Momoshiro in an indirect way.
Kaidoh frowns. "Y-yeah ..." he says, sounding quiet and defeated. It's just a dumb question. It shouldn't be this hard.
"Don't ... um ... tell him I want to know. Or anything." It's already embarrassing enough that he needs his little brother to talk to Momoshiro for him.
"Alright, I won't." Hazue gives him a confident nod. "Momo-nii-chan, wait up!" he calls out, and then starts sprinting towards the other man.
Momoshiro had been happily walking ahead so far, not paying much attention to the brothers talking (hey, he's giving them both brotherly time!) He slows down and turns his head around to see Hazue catching up to him. Hm. He was under the impression Hazue hated running, maybe he doesn't?
"Hey, what's up? Looking to score another present out of me for your birthday?" he asks teasingly when Hazue runs up next to him.
"Oh no, I could never ask for more, the muffin was already nice." Hazue gives him a slight smile.
"Cake. That was a cake," Momoshiro corrects him. Well, it would have been a bigger cake if they had more flour left.
"Alright, cake then. Tasted good too. Do you cook a lot at home?" Smooth Hazue, talk about home, then he can ask about Momoshiro's hypothetical girlfriend.
"No, not really. Don't have the money for it, you know. I mostly live off of instant ramen … and other things that are cheap at the conbi."
There, now's your chance Hazue! "Oh, so you don't have a girlfriend who cooks for you at home?" Wow, he's surprised how easy that sounded. Kaidoh should be taking notes from this.
Momoshiro frowns at Hazue, but then goes slightly pink, feeling a bit embarrassed that he'll have to say no to this question. "No … I don't have a girlfriend." Since about five years ago? Not to mention … that … thing … with Kaidoh. That would never happen if he had a girlfriend. Yeah. He's sure of it.
"Oh. That's good. I mean, uhh, cool. No, I mean, uhm, yay single life, right? I don't have one either." Hazue feels his tongue twisting up as he tries to make it sound like he's not glad. "Kaoru-nii-chan doesn't have a girlfriend either."
Again, Momoshiro frowns. He wonders if stuttering and flailing around runs in the family. Then he snorts at what Hazue said. "Well, that much is obvious. He could never get anyone to like him."
Hazue looks crestfallen, and is also insulted at the way Momoshiro is talking about his brother. "Don't say that, Kaoru-nii-chan has many good points. I'm sure he could get plenty of people to like him and date him." He feels like he needs to stand up for Kaidoh and put in a good word. He won't stand for someone slandering him.
Even if said slander might have a grain of truth.
Momoshiro laughs. "Well aren't you adorable. Please, do tell, what are your 'Kaoru-nii-chan's' good points, huh?" Kaidoh sure doesn't have any that Momoshiro knows of. And he knows Kaidoh pretty well.
Hazue gulps. "Uhm. Well. I uhh … he … uhm." He nervously shoots a glance back at Kaidoh; he hadn't expected the conversation to steer in this way. "He can run really well," he says, after grasping as nothing.
"Yeah, I'd call that a bad point. He runs way too fucking much. He's a freak." Momoshiro laughs again. Hazue sure is adorable for thinking anyone could ever like his brother and want to date him. Hah! Preposterous! He doesn't even know what that word means!
"He's not a freak!" Hazue immediately replies. "He just … really likes it. He has good focus. That's a good thing."
"That just means he's obsessed with it, squirt. Being obsessed with something isn't a good point."
Hazue pouts. Momoshiro is messing everything up. He's supposed to like Kaidoh, and be impressed by him. Not … this, where he seems to not think much of Kaidoh at all. "He's very kind!" he squeaks out.
"Not to me," Momoshiro grumbles. Kaidoh's never 'kind' to him. "Kaidoh's just a stupid grump all the time. I don't think anyone could ever tolerate him enough to like him. He'll just be forever alone, picking up dumbnuts day in and day out—and running every other chance he gets. He never does anything different anyway, and he certainly isn't kind to people! He just seems to hate everyone instead, or tolerate them enough to not want to punch them. He was like that in middle school as well. Obsessed with training, never made friends, never knew how to have fun—hah! While I was trying to get him to do things for fun, he would just reject any offer and go training instead. Fucking freak." Momoshiro suddenly turns around to face Kaidoh who is walking behind them.
"You hear that Kaidoh? You're a fucking freak!"
Kaidoh stops in his tracks and all the color drains from his face. "What the hell?!" he spits, and glares accusingly at his brother—What did he say to him anyway?—before quickly stomping towards both of them.
"You're the freak!" he shoots back, immaturely poking his finger into Momoshiro's chest. He's annoyed that he doesn't even have enough context to properly defend himself.
Momoshiro huffs and slaps Kaidoh's finger away, shoving at his chest. "I'm not the one with the obsession. Freak."
Hazue looks at the both of them with worried eyes. He looks at Kaidoh. "Momo-nii-chan doesn't mean that …"
"What obsession?!" Kaidoh demands. He glances frantically between Momoshiro and his brother. "There is no obsession!" His voice cracks a little with panic and nerves.
He eyes his brother with a look of betrayal. "Hazue…?" He said he wasn't going to say anything!
"Momo-nii-chan means—"
"You do have an obsession! Obsession with training!" Momoshiro yells at him. "Always training all the damn time. It's all you do. And you force Hazue-chan to do it too. That makes you a fucking freak."
Hazue tugs on Momoshiro's shirt. "I don't think that's wise to—"
Kaidoh cuts in with a growl, completely ignoring Hazue's attempt to mediate. He's too busy trying to shove his fist into Momoshiro's shirt so he can pull him close and yell in his face. "If I have an obsession with training then you have an obsession with complaining about it, dumbass!"
He hisses and lets go of Momoshiro's shirt, shoving him back again. "You're probably just jealous I have more strength and endurance than you!"
"Kaoru-nii-chan, I don't think that's what he—"
"What the hell—who would be jealous of the results from your stupid training!? It's the dumbest thing in the world!" This time Momoshiro grabs Kaidoh's shirt and shakes him around. "I am not jealous, you freak!"
"It's not dumb, asshole!" Kaidoh seizes Momoshiro by the collar and glares at him, his face all angry and contorted. "And you'd know that if you actually tried it sometimes, you lazy idiot."
There's a small voice in his brain telling him that he should stop before he pummels Momoshiro in the face with his fist—because Hazue is right there, and that's a terrible example for an older brother to set—but that voice is currently being drowned out entirely by irritation.
"If you're not jealous then what the hell is your problem?! It's not like it's bothering you! You don't even have to see me do it!"
Momoshiro feels like he's going to punch Kaidoh in the face soon—Hazue entirely forgotten. "Yeah, that's right, I don't see you! Asshole!" he snarls at him. They're so close to each other now, they're breathing in each other's faces, as if he's trying to punch Kaidoh with his face.
Hazue stands there next to them, hands going back and forth, wanting to pull either of them apart. This was not how it was supposed to go … He was supposed to find out Momoshiro had no girlfriend, and then happily share the news with Kaidoh. Not end up causing a weird fight between them. And if he doesn't stop them soon, it'll turn into a brawl!
"What's that supposed to mean?" Kaidoh demands, his fingers twisted up in Momoshiro's shirt like he's going to rip it. "I'm not going to do my training in the middle of the hut just so you can call it stupid to my face!"
"I don't want you to in the first place—because it would be stupid!" Momoshiro tries to get a good grip on Kaidoh's shirt at all, but they're so close it's kind of useless either way.
"Can you two just please—"
Kaidoh snarls back. "You're the one who's stupid!"
"You should really—"
"You're stupid!"
"You're stupider!"
Momoshiro shoves at Kaidoh's chest. "Fuck you!"
"Oh yeah?" Kaidoh shoves him right back. "Well, fuck you too, asshole!"
"Why you …" Momoshiro growls at Kaidoh, before he pulls back one of his arms, hand tightened in a fist. He's ready to punch the lights out of this moron. He's sick of it.
"ENOUGH!"
Momoshiro and Kaidoh both stop and blink at tiny little Hazue who's standing next to them, fuming.
"You two are just—ugh! Can't you behave like normal friends!? Or at least pretend you're friends for my birthday!?" Hazue's face by now is completely red, he's just so angry and annoyed at the moment. Annoyed at these two knuckleheads. He never knew his brother could act this … this .. juvenile! He glares at Momoshiro. "You—be honest and just say that you want to spend more time with Kaoru-nii-chan, instead of insulting his training and hope he'll get the hint." Then he glares at his own brother. "And you should realize Momo-nii-chan is only begging for attention, and to not fight with him straight away!"
"But I don't want his—"
"Oh shut up." Hazue turns on his heel, and he angrily stomps away.
Momoshiro simply stares as Kaidoh's little brother disappears from sight. Suddenly the fingers around Kaidoh's collar feel awkward. Well actually, the entire situation feels awkward.
Kaidoh scowls and drops his hand, his fingers tingly from clenching Momoshiro's shirt. "Now look what you did," he grumbles.
"What do you mean, I did it." Momoshiro lets go of Kaidoh's shirt as well, then flicks his forehead with his finger. "If you weren't such an ass, Hazue-chan wouldn't have stomped off. It's his birthday, you know. You could stand to be a bit nicer."
Kaidoh huffs and his mouth curves into a grimace. "Well, it's kind of hard when you're acting like my training is the worst thing in the world …" His brow furrows. Why does Momoshiro always do that anyway? Is there any truth to what Hazue said … Or does Momoshiro really just think running is that dumb?
Momoshiro huffs too. "Well, you just do it too much." He folds his arms over his chest and looks away from Kaidoh. "There's other things you can do."
"I know that," Kaidoh replies, scuffing his shoe in the sand. "I don't do it because it's the only thing to do. I do it because I want to."
"Aren't there more things you want to do, huh?" Momoshiro asks in a sarcastic tone.
"I do other things too!" Kaidoh protests, still feeling vaguely annoyed.
"Like?" Momoshiro rolls his eyes.
Kaidoh glares. "Why does it even matter? I don't tell you what to do!"
This time, Momoshiro simply stares at Kaidoh, eyes slightly narrowed, and his lips pulled in a thin line. No, Kaidoh doesn't tell Momoshiro what to do. He doesn't ask him to do anything, and he never does anything besides training. Hazue was right on the mark; Momoshiro was simply fighting for the attention that Kaidoh gives to his running. But it's not like he's going to say this to Kaidoh. Or even admit it. That's stupid. It's not that he wants to spend time with Kaidoh, not at all. He just wants him around more so he can bother him whenever Momoshiro feels like it. When Kaidoh is out running most of the time, this is hard to do.
And the hut becomes really silent and lonely.
So he ends up pissing Kaidoh off, one way or another, just to get him to come back to the hut (seems to work). To cut his training short. It's stupid, but it works. He just wishes Kaidoh would cut it short on his own. Or hang around more. Do less stupid running. Can he not bear to hang around Momoshiro for longer than an hour or something? Is that why he's gone most of the time? Well. Fuck him.
"No, no you don't." Momoshiro sighs. "Let's go find Hazue-chan, you stupid dumbass." He pushes past Kaidoh, knocking into his shoulder, and walks into the direction Hazue stomped off in.
"Yeah," Kaidoh agrees. He's deflated, like the fight has fizzled right out of him and been replaced by some weird, indiscernible feeling. He still doesn't understand why Momoshiro is so annoyed. It's just running. And it gives Momoshiro some space, which Kaidoh thinks Momoshiro would appreciate. Kaidoh would, anyway.
Whatever, if Momoshiro has such a problem with it, then that's his problem. There's nothing wrong with Kaidoh's training schedule. He's done it for years. Momoshiro is just an idiot.
But he might also be an idiot who wants Kaidoh's attention, if his brother's words have any grain of truth to them, and that makes Kaidoh feel even stranger, like his insides are tying together. He's used to Momoshiro just saying whatever he wants and thinks. So if he says Kaidoh's running is stupid then it's probably just because he thinks it's stupid, and not because of some weird hidden reason like he wants to spend time with Kaidoh. Probably. It feels too much like wishful thinking to see it any other way.
Kaidoh shrugs it off, trying to uncoil the knot of tension in his chest, and follows after Momoshiro, catching up to him and just walking alongside him silently. He steals a glance over at him, but Momoshiro's expression doesn't seem to reveal much. Kaidoh still doesn't know why the hell they were even fighting just now.
Hazue was on his way back to his own hut, still annoyed that his birthday had to end that way. Though somewhere along the line, he forgot which way to go, so instead he just sits underneath a palm tree for protection from the sun. Well this is stupid. He should have paid attention to where they were going (but it's kind of hard to when there's two adult men arguing with each other). He sighs, he feels as if watching that unravel took off ten years from his lifespan.
Now Hazue can clearly see though, why Kaidoh seems to be struggling to make progress with Momoshiro. They're both idiots. Hazue had always known his brother didn't have many social skills, but to the point of outright arguing with someone? No, he didn't expect that. Certainly not. And Momoshiro isn't helping. Despite being able to get along great with everyone, he has a quick temper and is childishly stubborn. How is Hazue going to help out his brother when both of them are doing whatever they can to ruin everything?
Maybe Hazue should just stop helping out his brother. Leave them to their own devices. Which probably means nothing will ever happen. But. That's not his fault. At least he's trying. He doesn't see Kaidoh trying.
And all this just had to happen on his birthday. Hazue sighs again.
Momoshiro has been silently walking next to Kaidoh all this time. He feels on edge. Like there wasn't a definite conclusion to their stupid fight, and it's still lingering in the air, unsolved, and annoying as hell. He wants to pull on Kaidoh's shirt again and punch him in the face, but that's probably not a good idea. It's all Kaidoh's fault. He had to go and pick a fight with him in front of Hazue (it doesn't matter Momoshiro started it by calling him a freak, those are just silly nicknames). If only the snake had more control.
And ran less. Momoshiro huffs and kicks some sand with his shoe, secretly aiming it towards Kaidoh's legs.
Kaidoh really has no good points at all. Hazue was lying, Momoshiro knows it. Whatever good point Kaidoh might have, it's ruined by his excessive need to pump out testosterone, all the damn time. Momoshiro would be a lot happier if Kaidoh simply spent that time sewing something girly. At least that's more productive. And could be done inside. And then maybe he could sew something cool for Momoshiro. If Kaidoh can stand him enough to want to spend that much time together.
Not that Momoshiro would ask this time. He's already been disheartened by the fact Kaidoh still hasn't given him a medal or anything, and it seems getting chan stitched onto his bandana is a lost cause now. It's like he suddenly lost his superpower. Kaidoh won't do it anymore, not after that stupid fight, which is still leaving Momoshiro restless.
More annoyed this time, Momoshiro kicks up some sand, and this time it definitely hits Kaidoh's shoes.
"What the hell," Kaidoh grumbles, knocking his elbow into Momoshiro's side. "Stop being such a jerk." Is Momoshiro trying to get Kaidoh to fight with him again? Is he still pissed off about … whatever it is—actually, Momoshiro is stupid enough to probably not even need a reason.
Momoshiro slaps Kaidoh's arm. "And you stop being, uhh—you," he says, not coming up with a good insult at the moment.
"Who am I supposed to be then, idiot?"
"Someone less annoying!"
Kaidoh scowls. "I'm not doing anything annoying. You're the one kicking sand everywhere!"
Momoshiro huffs, then he starts walking faster to get away from Kaidoh.
Kaidoh is right on his heels and then shoves past him, his shoulder knocking against Momoshiro's, even though the beach is wide enough they don't even need to be touching. Okay, now that is him being deliberately annoying.
And in turn, Momoshiro runs faster, speeding ahead of Kaidoh, and jabs his elbow into his side as he passes him by. But Kaidoh is not one to turn down a challenge, and he simply chases after Momoshiro, elbows jabbing everywhere, and Momoshiro ends up in this bizarre competition to see who can run faster, while trying to shove the other one into the ocean. Not that they're close to the ocean, there's enough sand on the beach for hundreds of people—but they have to mess around with each other.
It might not show, but Momoshiro is starting to feel less annoyed. This is how their fights are supposed to be. Stupid and moronic, with no thought behind it. It should never be about something … important. Or something stupid like that. Not that Momoshiro cares enough to fight for real with Kaidoh. He snorts, then places both of his palms against Kaidoh's side and gives him one forceful shove, enough to break the two apart.
"Hah, I win," says Momoshiro with an out of breath voice.
"Dumbass," Kaidoh says, heart pounding. He socks Momoshiro lightly in the shoulder. "You can't beat me."
"I just did," says Momoshiro. He points at their feet. Momoshiro is running a bit further ahead than Kaidoh. Only slightly.
Kaidoh hisses in challenge, not about to be outdone—especially not where running is concerned. He speeds up until he's ahead of Momoshiro, then swerves across the narrow stretch of beach between them to cut him off, his shoes kicking sand everywhere. Just as abruptly, he stops in the middle of Momoshiro's path, like a roadblock, and spins around so that Momoshiro doesn't have anywhere to run but right into Kaidoh.
"Loser," he breathes, feeling satisfied with himself.
And Momoshiro crashes right into Kaidoh with such force it knocks him off his feet. They land together in the sand, and Momoshiro whines when Kaidoh's elbow hits him in his ribs, and his knee manages to hit a sharp seashell hidden beneath the sand. He props himself up, knees and hands in sand, with Kaidoh trapped beneath. He glares at Kaidoh, since this is all his fault.
"Asshole. This just means I'm still on top, and I win. Idiot."
"Yeah well, don't get comfortable like that, you won't be on top for long," Kaidoh warns, and then lets out a growl as his hands fly to Momoshiro's shoulders to try and push him off, his leg hooking behind Momoshiro's knee so he can roll them both over. It works, like some kind of weird wrestling move he's perfected, and Momoshiro ends up on his back in the sand.
Kaidoh looks down at Momoshiro from his new position and presses his knuckles into the front of Momoshiro's shirt. He narrows his eyes and says, "I'm not going to let you win that easily."
Momoshiro narrows his eyes at Kaidoh—partly because the sun is right behind him and it's blinding him—and tries to yank his fist away from his chest, but Kaidoh is being stubborn. He huffs as he stops struggling and simply looks back at Kaidoh.
"You know I'm going to throw you off in a second, right?" Momoshiro asks. His voice sounds annoyed, but it's more pent up irritation than anything else.
There's something that's going through Momoshiro's mind as he looks at Kaidoh like that. How many times have they done this already? Their eternal power struggle, the push and pull, always throwing each other on the ground and trying to get on top. It seems like there will never be an end to it; neither is going to accept the loser position, nor do they want the other to be the winner.
Not that there ever was a winner before. Momoshiro would like to say of course he's better than Kaidoh, but truth is, he's not. Not because he's worse than Kaidoh, in whatever situation he can come up with, it's because Kaidoh's always matching up with him. Always in for a challenge, never backing down, and in the end, both of them are too tired to continue and break it off. There's never a clear winner with them. Never. Because Kaidoh is not just his rival, but also his equal. More and more, Momoshiro realizes this. Especially as of late, when they're doing things like kissing each other, or acting on their horny hormones (a subject that he still tries his best to avoid), Momoshiro can't help but think the only reason why he can do something like that with Kaidoh, is because they're on the same level.
It's not a matter of being on top, or being the winner.
Momoshiro stays true to his word, and after a few long seconds of staring at Kaidoh, he throws him off, but doesn't roll back on him, instead he stays still. Lying next to Kaidoh who's also down in the sand. He looks at him, a slight smirk gracing his face.
No, it's a matter of being by each other's sides.
That's always been the thing that Momoshiro liked most about his rivalry with Kaidoh. Not on top, not in the bottom—but side by side. Doing all sorts of things together. Yeah. He likes that.
He likes it a lot. Which is why Momoshiro doesn't like it when Kaidoh uses most of his free time to go running instead. He doesn't mind hanging out more with Kaidoh. Or perhaps he should say, he'd like it if they did, but his stupid training always seems to come first. He wakes up alone in the morning, and goes to bed alone—simply because Kaidoh is busy running. And yeah, Momoshiro is kind of growing resentful at it. A stupid and childish thing to do. But it's not like Momoshiro can come out and say 'hey, I want to spend time with you', because that's not how they talk, and it sounds gross, and it's not true. And okay, well, maybe it is. But still. He's not going to tell Kaidoh that. That would seem so needy and girly, as if he cares what Kaidoh does. And he certainly doesn't! He thinks. Maybe.
He still ends up throwing some sand on Kaidoh's shirt though. Just because he's an asshole for stopping in the middle while running.
Kaidoh lies there, just breathing, still scowling a bit despite the fact that he doesn't really feel annoyed, or defeated, but just like things have been evened out again and the air has been cleared. And he feels kind of relieved that the urge to punch Momoshiro's lights out has faded.
He brushes the sand off his shirt, muttering, "Moron," as he does, and then flicks some sand back at Momoshiro's arm, which is an easy target since it's just lying there. He glances over at Momoshiro, who doesn't look as pissed off anymore either, and somehow that also helps to settle Kaidoh's restless pulse.
He still feels kind of twisted up though, from the weird argument before, and he doesn't know why, but it's not really something he can mention or ask about. If they were to both just honestly lay out all their issues and frustrations then they wouldn't have a reason to fight anymore, and the fighting is a constant Kaidoh's come to rely on. It isn't that he wants to fight with Momoshiro, at least not all the time, but it's just what they do. It's like a weird comfort zone for them to both fall into, a language they both know.
So whatever, he'll just chock this fight up to Momoshiro being an idiot, and maybe Kaidoh being an idiot too. And they can both forget about it. That's always the way their fights seem to go. Neither one of them holds a grudge and by the next time it happens they've both forgotten what they were fighting about the time before.
Even if it is something especially stupid.
Kaidoh looks up at the sky. It really is a nice day. And Hazue ...
"We should … probably apologize to my brother when we find him," Kaidoh thinks aloud, feeling guilty—for fighting in front of Hazue, not for fighting in the first place. Because yeah, the whole thing might be partly his fault after all.
"Probably," Momoshiro repeats. He doesn't really think there's anything to apologize about. They always fight, it's just their thing. He turns his head over, cheek rubbing against the sand, and he looks at Kaidoh's face.
He sort of wants to tell him, that he's not sorry. He's only sorry for Hazue having to witness it on his birthday. This is how Momoshiro works with Kaidoh. They just argue, over silly stuff. They usually don't mean it, and it's always forgotten again by the next time they fight. It's never about anything important, or anything serious. When they get serious … well, Momoshiro can barely remember a time when they were in a real argument. It might have been the last time when he and Kaidoh were training the tennis club members to gain a regular spot on the team. Yeah, back then both of them had been frustrated—but not with each other. They just, took it out on each other. That's the only time Momoshiro can remember them being serious though.
Then again, what Hazue said during his burst of anger did have a grain of truth in it, and Momoshiro wonders if Kaidoh realizes this. The thing about wanting to spend more time together (he totally doesn't!). Well. It's a stupid thing to argue about anyway, and Kaidoh's too stupid to realize it.
"I'm not sorry," says Momoshiro. He isn't. Not for fighting. He continues to stare at Kaidoh, and sees him turning his head to look back at him. There's this weird bloated feeling filling him up as he looks Kaidoh in the eye. That wasn't there before.
Momoshiro moves his hand closer to Kaidoh's, which had been resting next to his. His pinky brushes up against Kaidoh's, and he almost feels like pulling away, but doesn't. Does nothing but hold Kaidoh's gaze and feels his heart starting to speed up at the thought about what he's going to do next. He curls his pinky ever so slightly, lifting it up, so that it's hooked around Kaidoh's, and he keeps it there, resting it on top.
"... I think," Momoshiro adds a bit unsure. Suddenly he feels kind of embarrassed, so he turns his head away.
Kaidoh tenses up a little, his heart thudding in his chest, and his eyes flick down to their hands. His fingers itch to push closer to Momoshiro's, and at the same time he wants to jerk them away. He settles for just letting his hand rest there, palm awkwardly frozen in place against the sand.
He keeps looking at their hands as he slowly says, "Yeah, me neither," and realizes that it's true. And that he's agreeing with Momoshiro on something, which is weird. Sure, he's embarrassed that his brother saw him get into a stupid fight, but as for the stupid fight itself? Well, Kaidoh's not going to be sorry for the things he does with Momoshiro. Stupid or otherwise.
And as long as Momoshiro isn't either, then they're good.
So Kaidoh doesn't say anything else, just sucks in a long breath like he's working up all his courage, and then moves his hand, sliding it away at first and then returning it, this time covering the back of Momoshiro's hand with his palm.
"Yeah …" says Momoshiro in a low breath. He can feel his face becoming uncomfortably warm, and it's a good thing he decided to turn away from Kaidoh before, since he's sure he's making some kind of embarrassing expression.
Kaidoh's hand feels like a solid weight on top of his own. It's not like they haven't done a whole lot more already—things his imagination wouldn't even have let him think of—but this simple gesture is stirring up a whole lot of things inside of Momoshiro. It's kind of crazy, the way it's making him feel like his body temperature shot through the roof, and it's uncomfortable, but at the same time it's an addicting kind of feeling. Like he wants more of it, like he doesn't want it to go away.
He's felt it before. It started on his birthday—or maybe that's just when he started paying attention to it—and it's popped up every once in a while since then, growing more intense each time. Like it's digging a spot inside of his chest and making itself comfortable over there. Even now it's a constant current flowing through him. Safe and secure, it feels right like this, as if they won't be separated and they'll face anything together, however cheesy that may sound. But it's also scary, because Momoshiro has never felt like this before, and it's Kaidoh who's eliciting these feelings out of him. It's all new and confusing, but Momoshiro isn't going to run away from it. Not like the first time this happened.
Instead, Momoshiro spreads his fingers apart across the sand, so that Kaidoh's fall in between his, and he slowly squeezes them shut. All five fingers curl around those of Kaidoh's, and this time he can't pretend it's an accidental bump. Or an extension of fighting by grabbing his hand and holding him down. No, this time Momoshiro can't pretend it's anything but holding Kaidoh's hand. A scary and foreign thought, but he's not pulling away, even if his heart is speeding up dangerously fast as if he's treading forbidden territory.
"Guess we should … find him," says Momoshiro. He sounds like that's the last thing he wants to do; get up and find Hazue.
Kaidoh grunts in agreement, momentarily at a loss for words. He doesn't really make any effort to move right away though, because he's enjoying the feeling of his hand against Momoshiro's, and the light and buoyant sensation it's causing in his chest. He doesn't know when he'll get the chance to feel that again, so he's trying to stretch each second out for as long as he can. He squeezes his fingers against Momoshiro's and they feel so warm and reassuring that Kaidoh doesn't want to let go. It feels like where his hand is supposed to be. His heart pounds out a steady, rising rhythm, like it thinks so too.
Eventually, though, Kaidoh does slip his fingers out from Momoshiro's and sits up, then rises to his feet, brushing the sand off his shorts and shirt. He doesn't look at Momoshiro, in part because his own face feels hot and is probably red, and also because he's nervous to; he's not really sure what kind of expression he'd find if he did. Instead he just looks at the sand, hisses, and offers out his hand—the same one—to Momoshiro to pull him up.
Momoshiro's hand reaches out for Kaidoh's, as if there's a magnetic force pulling him along. He doesn't really want to lose the sensation of Kaidoh's warm hand, strong and sturdy, holding his own. His fingers wrap around the palm of Kaidoh's hand; it gets easier each time he does it, but it still makes something hopeful thump in his chest. He lets himself get pulled up by Kaidoh, fast and steady, until he's on his feet, standing in front of him, but neither are looking at each other. The sand suddenly looks very fascinating to the both of them.
Momoshiro looks at their hands instead, still loosely hanging together by a thin thread. The slightest movement of either of them could make his fingers slip out of Kaidoh's hold. But they're standing very still. He should pull away, separate from each other, and go find Hazue. But he's finding it harder and harder to do, because at the moment, yeah, he sort of wants to continue holding it. To continue feeling that fluttering breeze pulsing through his body. He wonders if Kaidoh's thinking the same. Perhaps even feeling the same. Both their fingers are hanging onto each other so hopefully, that Momoshiro thinks that maybe, Kaidoh doesn't want to let go either.
But it still has to happen. Momoshiro looks back down to the ground, he doesn't want to be the first one to pull away. That task is laid upon Kaidoh; he can be the first. Momoshiro isn't going to. Doesn't want to. His chest feels kind of tight.
Kaidoh doesn't want to let go either, but he feels like he should because it's starting to tip over from being something incidental to becoming something deliberate. Some kind of thing. Something with meaning and consequences and Kaidoh's not sure what those might be, just feels both frightened and excited thinking about them. And his palm is getting all sweaty like Momoshiro's hand is conducting heat through him, zapping him with electrical currents and leaving his fingers feeling fried and warm all over.
He's thought about this before, sure, maybe even fantasized about it, although calling it that makes him feel embarrassed. It's just something he's imagined in his head—recently more and more, like continued proximity to Momoshiro is making his mind kick into overdrive. It's a stupid thing to want, one he's not willing to admit to wanting, but that doesn't change the fact that he likes it all the same. He likes being close to Momoshiro, wishes it could always be simple like this, like their two hands against each other, wishes he didn't have to find excuses to do it. And maybe he doesn't. After all, Momoshiro didn't jerk away from him, didn't glare or yell at him, didn't stop holding his hand. Maybe Momoshiro doesn't need an excuse either. Maybe Momoshiro likes it just as much.
But Kaidoh knows they have to let go, because they can't exactly walk around holding hands all the time. That would be … Kaidoh's mind wants to supply a lot of adjectives for what it would be, ones that make his insides feel fluffy and tingly, but he settles on "dumb". Yes, it would be dumb. And he can't really wrap his head around how it would work, if it would work, if it's how they're supposed to be.
But it feels like it is.
He squeezes Momoshiro's hand once, like this is some kind of weird secret handshake, and then lets his hand loosen and drop to his side, hating the way his fingers feel as they slide away. Immediately, he wants to pull Momoshiro back again but feels like that's suddenly, abruptly, off-limits.
"Come on," he says gruffly, tilting his head in the direction he knows his hut is in, further up the beach, and to Echizen and Hazue's further beyond that.
Momoshiro feels himself snapping out of the warm daze he was in. As if the balance of will they or won't they was tipped over, and Kaidoh made the decision. They won't.
"Right," says Momoshiro. He feels his voice cracking up, as if he hasn't used it in a while. He covers his face with the hand that was grasped in Kaidoh's hold moments before; it's kind of sweaty and feels so warm it's embarrassing. The entire thing is.
They start walking into the direction Hazue dashed off in, sticking close to one another. Momoshiro drops the hand away from his face, and is acutely aware of where it is in proximity to Kaidoh's. Not that he needs to imagine this, since Kaidoh is right there and it's like the back of his hand is radiating heat that's wrapping around Momoshiro's sweaty one. Suddenly, Momoshiro forgot why this had looked like a good thing to do. Maybe he was just caught in the moment—which is how he explains all the other times he's done things with Kaidoh—but there's still this itching feeling to link their hands again.
Which should be a disgusting feeling.
Nevertheless, as they walk back across the sand, silent and strained, still refusing to look at each other, Momoshiro's hand bumps into the back of Kaidoh's several times. It's like they're glued together, neither one willing to separate very far from the other.
It's a scary thought and desire to Momoshiro, that he wants to slip his fingers between Kaidoh's again, because it did feel nice. But now it feels like the hardest thing to do on earth. Not to mention it's a desire he shouldn't be having. This doesn't stop him from brushing his hand up against Kaidoh's once again, in a way that's deliberate and not on accident at all. That's one way to do it, he guesses. Better than skipping around in the sand with their hands linked together. That's just gross. What would Hazue think?
Kaidoh tries to re-focus his thoughts, force himself to think about anything that isn't Momoshiro's hand swinging next to his. Which is difficult because he's acutely aware of how close they are, and how easy it would be to just take Momoshiro's fingers between his own again. But at the same time it no longer feels easy at all. And as much as Kaidoh would like to do it, he doesn't. He just walks next to Momoshiro, side by side, along the beach. His skin seems to tingle each time it brushes against Momoshiro's but it's not unpleasant, and he doesn't make any effort to walk further away from him. It's like he's being drawn to him by gravity, like it's simply inevitable.
As they walk around the beach's curving peninsula, Kaidoh spots a small Hazue-shaped shadow seated under a palm tree and nudges Momoshiro in the side until he sees him too. Suddenly that embarrassment he'd felt earlier comes back, but he's not fighting with Momoshiro anymore—sort of the opposite, in fact—and hopefully Hazue isn't too annoyed, and the day is still salvageable.
"Hazue!" Kaidoh calls out, and for some reason he takes a step away from Momoshiro as he does, like he's got something to feel guilty for and is trying to cover it up or hide it. Like he doesn't trust his hand not to try and reach for Momoshiro's again.
Momoshiro side-eyes him a bit, seeing how fast Kaidoh springs away from him as if suddenly it's toxic to be around him. Well, fine, understandable. He doesn't really want anyone seeing him so close to Kaidoh either. He especially doesn't want anyone seeing them holding hands. Not that they were. Definitely not. That was just a long extended brofist, except it was sort of not. But whatever, it's a small detail that Momoshiro can overlook. He's not sure if anyone else can.
Hazue looks up and sees Kaidoh and Momoshiro heading towards him. He sighs and nods his head at them; he hopes they're not fighting anymore, and came to apologize.
Momoshiro is definitely not apologizing. For brofisting Kaidoh. He stops as he squints his eyes in thought; that doesn't sound right.
"Kaoru-nii-chan, Momo-nii-chan—are you both cooled down now?"
"Actually—" Momoshiro starts, but stops himself. He wanted to say that he in fact, feels pretty hot. It's over a hundred degrees outside, and well, he just had a nice brofist thing with Kaidoh going on which left him rather sunburned. He should really take care of that sunburn. He sighs and looks down at the sand, standing next to Kaidoh, and hopes his hand won't suddenly reach out for his. That's enough for today.
"Yeah uhm, Kaidoh admits to being a loser, and he apologizes. And stuff. Wanna go to Dumbnuts Cove?"
"Momoshiro is the lo—" Kaidoh starts to say, but stops himself, because they're not supposed to be fighting anymore. At least not while Hazue is around. He hisses and hangs his head. "I mean, uh. Sorry," he says instead, and looks away from his brother to give Momoshiro a pointed scowl. "Momoshiro admits it's his own fault though."
Then he looks back at Hazue and tries to smile, although the expression doesn't quite sit right on his face. "But forget about that … It's still your birthday, let's go celebrate it."
Hazue doesn't think either of them are sorry at all, nor do they look like they've made up. Is this how they act all the time? Always fighting? Then why is he trying to get his brother to confess to this man who does nothing but rile him up? Is that actually a good idea? Perhaps it's not. Hazue certainly has never seen his brother act this vulgar. He'd prefer it if he didn't act like that. He stands up and rises to his feet, facing the both of them.
"No more fighting with each other, okay?" he says with a stern voice, as if he's a mother scolding her children.
Momoshiro happily slings an arm around Kaidoh's shoulder, acting as if they're best buds. "Deal! We're best friends already, see?" He gives Hazue a big smile.
But Hazue looks at them with serious eyes. "Never again," he says this time.
Kaidoh's eyes widen. Never again? Is his brother insane? Does he have any idea how impossible that would be? Fighting with Momoshiro feels like a fundamental part of Kaidoh's existence. As essential as running. It isn't something he can just switch off. Kaidoh is pretty sure Momoshiro wouldn't be able to either.
He's too busy feeling horrified at Hazue's request to even acknowledge Momoshiro's arm around him, and just looks nervously back at his brother.
"Uh," he says hesitantly. "That's really …" He trails off and hisses again, this time looking at Momoshiro for some kind of help. He's never had to explain or justify their fights to anyone before. No one else would get it.
"Not possible," Momoshiro finishes in a deadpan voice.
He looks back at Kaidoh. Well, it isn't! Fighting with Kaidoh is like a natural course of action. No matter what they end up doing, it's always going to end up with one of them arguing. Or well, mostly it's just both of them doing stupid things and saying stupid things. Momoshiro can't help it. Kaidoh's just stupid most of the time, so of course Momoshiro's going to call him out for being stupid. Or being a freak. Besides, he likes the fights.
It's probably the easiest thing to understand about them. A lot easier to explain than the sudden desire to keep his arm hanging around Kaidoh for no reason.
Hazue looks at Momoshiro, wondering if he really means that. "You can't stop fighting each other, really?"
Momoshiro wants to say that's simple because Kaidoh is made up out of 70 percent idiocy, but that's probably not a good thing to say in front of Hazue, who is his brother. Instead he just pats Kaidoh's shoulder.
"We don't fight all the time, right Kaidoh?" No, they pretty much do.
"Obviously not, moron," Kaidoh retorts with a growl, then his cheeks go a little pink as he realizes he's not really doing much to defend their point if he's already arguing with Momoshiro again over something.
He looks guiltily at his brother. "We don't," he stresses, and hopes it sounds at least somewhat convincing, and then says, "It's really not something you should worry about …" which sounds a little bit too much like 'mind your own business', so he adds, "because it's not that big of a deal." And it isn't. To them, anyway. It's just what they do. It's just how they are together. It's always felt normal. It's everyone else who's strange for not understanding it.
"Yeah, we get along just fine, don't we, Kaidoh?" Momoshiro tightens his grip on Kaidoh some more, almost choking him, and pushes Kaidoh into his side. "This is just how we act. But we're sorry for confusing you, or something, okay? We promise to behave a little more around you."
Hazue sighs. "I guess I'll have to concede to that, don't I?" He looks at his brother, who's half being choked by Momoshiro, and shakes his head. "But can you both try to act a bit nicer to each other?" Especially his brother, he can tone it down on his language.
Then Hazue looks at Momoshiro, with a slight playful smile on his face. "I mean, Momo-nii-chan, you like Kaoru-nii-chan, right?"
Momoshiro feels his entire face heat up, and he immediately pushes Kaidoh away from him with a, "No I don't." When he sees Hazue looking at him with a raised eyebrow, and Kaidoh's already hissing at him for shoving him away, he pulls Kaidoh back. "No, I mean, yes. I like him." And with that, he pushes Kaidoh away again. "As a punching buddy," he stresses. Definitely not in any other way than that.
It's hard for Kaidoh to hide the sour expression that pulls across his face, but lucky for him he usually looks like that anyway so maybe it doesn't show much. He should be happy that Momoshiro says he likes him at all, but what the hell is a punching buddy supposed to be? He narrows his eyes, feeling confused.
"Well yeah, same goes for you," he grumbles. Stupid idiot.
Momoshiro leans closer to Kaidoh again, raising his hand and pinching Kaidoh's cheek, hard. "See, we get along." He pinches harder, just because he feels like messing with Kaidoh.
Hazue simply rolls his eyes. "No more fighting, okay?"
"Fine," Kaidoh agrees reluctantly, but not before he's smacked away Momoshiro's hand and given him an annoyed glare.
Momoshiro steps on Kaidoh's foot when Hazue isn't looking. There. Asshole. He deserves it. For being grumpy.
Kaidoh bites back an insult, which turns out to be kind of a challenge—he has to physically screw up his mouth to keep words from coming out. Instead, he knocks his shoulder into Momoshiro's in a way he hopes will pass as accidental. Because he has to do something.
"Well then, let's finally go to Dumbnuts Cove!" Momoshiro cries out. He steps forward, pressing his entire hand into Kaidoh's face, pushing him back. Revenge.
"Yes, alright," says Hazue with a slight smile. He notices the way Momoshiro and Kaidoh seem to be having a power struggle, but as long as no punches or swear words are being thrown around, then it should be fine. "Lead the way."
Kaidoh pushes past Momoshiro, elbowing him sharply in the side as he does, and starts taking long strides in the sand, blazing a trail of footprints along the beach. Even though he isn't running, he's still moving fast; he doesn't see the point in wasting time with walking.
He looks back over his shoulder and calls out, "We've still got a bit of a ways to go," and then gives Momoshiro a narrowed glance like he's taunting him to hurry the hell up, like he's taken the lead in their weird race from before.
Momoshiro chases after him, an evil grin displaying on his face. He elbows Kaidoh as well when he passes him—payback. It's simply something he cannot control, and something he won't stop, no matter who's asking.
Hazue stays back a bit and slaps his own forehead; these two are not going to stop acting like children. Maybe he should just learn to deal with it.