Chapter 4
Catherine couldn't believe it, it had been nearly a year since she had seen or heard anything from Jackie and yet here she was standing on her doorstep. "Jacqueline what are you doing here?" Catherine's heart pounded in her chest causing her to fumble over the words. She looked Jackie up and down slowly, Jackie had changed a lot, her small almost childlike frame had been replaced with a sexy, strong athletic body with skin that glowed from the Californian sun, and Catherine gazed at Jackie lustfully biting down on her lower lip. "I had to see you" Jackie said "can I come in?" she added stepping towards the door. Catherine opened the door wider as Jackie walked in and greeted Ethan. Catherine closed the door behind them 'Why now? Why after all this time is she hear' Catherine thought to herself, shock had taken full control of her body, Catherine grabbed Jackie's shoulders and turned her to face her "What are you doing here Jackie?" Catherine was starting to get angry, after all this was the girl who changed her life, because of Jackie Catherine's world had come crumbling down around her, she had lost her job at the university under humiliating circumstances, her friends abandoned her like a social pray and her life still lay in tatters nearly a year later. Jackie was the kind of girl Catherine had avoided her entire life, it was never a secret about Catherine's lust for young impressionable students but she swore she would never allow herself to fall in love with one of them. Jackie stepped back showing the fear in her eyes and shifted nervously, as she repeated herself. "You already said that" Catherine answered back and walked into the kitchen. Catherine wasn't sure what to do; standing in front of her was the woman that she loved but looking at Jackie now just made her feel angry. Catherine reached for a glass and poured herself a large glass of scotch in an effort to calm herself down. "Catherine, I ..." Jackie hesitated, Catherine could sense some huge explosion was about to take place in her kitchen and desperately wanted to run from it but Jackie regained her composure and provided the explosion before Catherine could stop her. All the time Jackie was speaking, Catherine's head was void of any thoughts or feelings probably because of the shocking revelation Jackie was laying before her. Once finished Jackie looked down at her feet, whilst Catherine took a large gulp of scotch eventually looking up from the floor Jackie met Catherine's eyes which made Catherine feel even more uncomfortable "I left you once, please don't ask me to do it again, because I can't" Jackie spoke triumphantly like it was the hardest thing she ever had to do. Catherine's face flushed as she downed the last of her scotch, Catherine stared at Jackie standing there trying to be brave but still showing signs of that terrified undergrad from school. Catherine loved her, although she hated herself for doing so but even though she was angry with Jackie, seeing her standing there all vulnerable after baring her feelings all Catherine wanted to do was hold her. "Say something" Jackie said weakly, Catherine walked over to Jackie, took her face in her hands so she could look into those blue eye "You have no idea what you do to me" Catherine answered and kissed Jackie deeply leading her into a passionate embrace. All Jackie's fears and doubts started to fade away, both women now had given in to desire which was the driving force in the room. The hairs on the back of Jackie's neck stood on end as Catherine's touch sent waves of electricity through every cell in her body, Jackie began to tug at Catherine's clothes hungrily "Jackie" Catherine said between breaths "I'm not so sure this is a good idea" but Jackie paid no attention to her, she wanted Catherine, to satisfy her in every way possible. Once Jackie began kissing Catherine's neck, Catherine finally gave in and only broke up the moment to lead Jackie to that all too familiar room upstairs. Catherine pushed Jackie heard into the wardrobe, the handles dug into the soft flesh in the small of her back but she didn't care, she knew where this was leading and willed it to happen. Catherine started to unbutton Jackie's top revealing Jackie's tight vest which defined her athletic but small upper body, as Catherine slid the unbuttoned shirt off Jackie's shoulders Jackie tried to manoeuvre Catherine towards the bed but she didn't move, except to push Jackie back against the wardrobe "Ahh" Catherine said seductively running her hands over Jackie's breasts. Jackie's body responded her nipples becoming hard and erect "Catherine" undertones of pleasure made Jackie's voice wobble. But it was Catherine's turn not to pay attention as she was now on her knees kissing the smooth soft skin on Jackie's stomach, in that moment Catherine dropped her hands to unzip Jackie's jeans and guided then down to the floor. Jackie pulled Catherine back onto her feet, kissed her deeply and stepped out of her jeans. Holding Catherine tightly to her, she tried for the bed again and this time Catherine gave in, Jackie seizing the opportunity, forcefully shoved Catherine down onto the bed. As Jackie began to run her hands over Catherine's body she could feel the full extent of Catherine's weight loss, Jackie could feel Catherine's ribs and hip bones protruding from under her skin, her once elegant and luscious body was no just skin and bone, it felt like Jackie was touching an entirely different body than the one that used to belong to the woman she loved, Jackie absent –mindedly had stopped what she was doing and just stared at Catherine's body her eyes filled with sadness and concern. Catherine opened her eyes when Jackie stopped running her hands over her body, she could see what the problem was straight away Jackie's eyes told her. Catherine lay back on the pillow and started to cry "What's wrong Catherine" Jackie asked as she rolled of the top and laid next to her. Catherine couldn't find words, she had wanted Jackie so much since she had left for LA, now she was back telling Catherine all the things she didn't want to hear but knew she needed to, Catherine wiped her eyes, staring up at Jackie she could see the concern in her eyes "Jackie, I" Catherine sobbed "I'm so sorry" Catherine blurted out. Jackie wasn't quite sure what to say, Catherine had never apologised for anything while they were together despite all her casual cruelty "It's Ok" Jackie replied not knowing exactly what Catherine was apologising for and moved closer to take Catherine in her arms. The inside of Catherine's head started screaming 'How dare you cry and give in' for the last 10 months Catherine had been doing everything and anyone to try and banish Jackie from her thoughts and yet here she was in her bed, if left Catherine feeling broken and betrayed by her own soul. Catherine snuggled down into Jackie's arms avoiding eye contact, all she wanted was Jackie to hold her. Jackie looked down at Catherine lying in her arms, she seemed so weak and vulnerable not the strong confident predatory woman who had seduced Jackie to this very room little over a year ago. Jackie bent down and kissed the top of Catherine's head holding her tighter, Catherine let out a huge sigh and started to drift off to sleep, feeling safe and protected in Jackie's arms. The last words Catherine spoke were "I missed you porcupine" and with that both women fell asleep entwined in each other's arms.