A slightly longer update here! Let me know what you think :). Thanks to everyone for reading!
Serena pulled into her driveway and switched off the engine, taking the moment before Hanssen's car appeared behind her to check her make up in the mirror. She told herself to get a grip, but it didn't help. For the umpteenth time since they had left the hospital she wondered what, precisely, had come over her, but that didn't help either. There was nothing she could do about it now. Taking a deep breath and grabbing the takeout bag, she got out of the car and headed towards her front door.
'Here'. Hanssen had parked his car and was standing beside her on the doorstep. She thrust the bag of food at him while she hunted in her handbag for her keys.
'Why don't you keep them with your car keys?'
Serena gave him a look that said she thought he had gone completely mad before her hand emerged, triumphantly clutching a Yale key.
'Because then if I lose my house key, I don't lose my car key as well. And vice versa'.
She pushed open the door and switched on the hall light as Hanssen followed her in. As she dropped her handbag on the floor and shrugged out of her jacket, she could feel his eyes following her. It was not an unpleasant feeling but, like so many today, it was one she was not expecting.
'Food first?' Serena didn't think she could cope with thinking about Jac's new procedure, or Hanssen, before she had something to eat.
'I think we'd better'. Hanssen hung his coat up on a hook by the door, smoothing out the creases carefully. 'I find the thoracic esophagus always looks better on a full stomach'.
Serena led the way back to the kitchen. That morning seemed like a very long time ago, and she still couldn't quite believe that Hanssen had been in here making breakfast. If there hadn't still been toast crumbs on the chopping board, she would have wondered if she had dreamt it. She turned around to take the bag from him, and as their fingers brushed felt a slight twist in her gut that had nothing to do with hunger.
'Can I do anything?'
She thought he looked slightly uncomfortable, and was almost relieved. Things hadn't gone completely topsy-turvy just yet, then.
'Plates are in there'. She indicated a cupboard and started pulling the foil cartons out of the bag.
'Shredded beef, chicken in black bean, stir fried broccoli, spring rolls with extra roll and extra spring, and – did you really order this one?' She held up a carton that had fried dumplings written on the top in black marker pen. Hanssen squinted at it before nodding.
Serena shook her head, smiling, and opened a drawer for some cutlery. She wondered if she could get used to Hanssen surprising her.
'Didn't put you down as a dumpling kind of person, but never mind'.
'Really?' Hanssen sat down at the table and began spooning the food onto the plates. 'What kind of person did you put me down as?'
Serena shrugged. She was beginning to enjoy herself. 'Oh, I don't know. Maybe more of the king-prawn-with-garlic-and-chilli kind'.
'A king prawn?' Hanssen raised his eyebrows before returning his gaze to his plate. 'Useful to know, I suppose. Would you like one?' Serena smirked as she sat down opposite him and took a dumpling from the carton.
'You did look more relaxed earlier, though', she remarked, taking the full plate he handed to her. 'I thought you would have realized by now that I don't bite'.
Hanssen's eyebrows almost reached his hairline.
'That could be open for debate'. The ghost of a smile crossed his face. 'And yes, I maybe was more relaxed, as you put it, this morning. That was before I'd had all day to think about it'.
'Think about what?'
Serene thought she knew what – that last night and this morning had probably taken him by surprise just as much as her – but she couldn't resist teasing him a little. He didn't answer, however, but merely nodded towards her plate.
'Your food's getting cold, Serena'.
'Back on first name terms, are we?'
'It would seem appropriate. Since we are back in your kitchen'.
They ate in silence for a while and Serena felt her slight wariness return, still thinking about what had precipitated this change in Hanssen's attitude. She had certainly given him no reason to soften towards her as far as she was aware, and even she would admit that her behaviour in the past had been….questionable. And when she had told him she didn't bite, that was of course assuming that the bait was not a promotion into his job. Her ambition had been an unfortunate fact of life of which he was very well aware. Finally she put down her fork and leaned back in her chair, looking over to see Hanssen's eyes already on her.
'Why have you done all of this today?'
Hanssen looked as if he was expecting the question, and was considering his words carefully.
'A colleague needed a favour'. His expression gave nothing away, and Serena wondered whether he knew how to play poker.
'So if it had been Michael Spence's car that had broken down you would have done the same thing?'
The corner of Hanssen's mouth twitched slightly.
'I don't think Mr Spence would have needed me to tell him he had a broken suspension spring, for a start'. He stood up, unfolding his long legs, and carried their empty plates over to the sink to soak. 'And the look of shock on his face when I offered a lift wouldn't have been nearly as gratifying so no, I probably wouldn't have'.
He filled the kettle and turned away from Serena to rinse out the coffee pot from that morning. She almost missed his next sentence because of the running water.
'And I very much doubt whether Mr Spence would have made a hangover look quite so good'.
Serena stared at his back, wondering if she had heard correctly or if the water was playing tricks with her ears. Was he flirting with her?
'I wasn't hungover'.
He didn't answer, but turned off the tap and dried the coffee pot. He seemed to be avoiding her gaze and for the sake of something to do, Serena got up and fetched the coffee from the fridge. As she looked inside, she realized that he had been right that morning. She really did need to go shopping.
'Have you read any of Miss Naylor's report?'
'You mean her version of 'War and Peace?'' She knew that he was changing the subject deliberately and decided to let him get away with it for now, if only because she wasn't sure herself what to say. 'Not much. Enough to know that it's probably going to give me nightmares about bits of my bowel appearing in my gullet'.
'It's an amazing procedure. Truly groundbreaking'. Hanssen took the coffee from her and carefully measured some out into the pot.
'I'm sure it is'. Serena paused to watch, standing next to him with her back against the kitchen counter. 'I usually just tip it in'.
The look he gave her would have made a lesser mortal cringe, but Serena just shrugged and reached across him for a piece of beef that had been left in the carton.
'Usually comes out ok'.
Hanssen just shook his head.
'Remind me never to let you make me coffee', he muttered.
Serena licked her fingers, now sticky from the beef, and picked up the folder that was sat on the counter.
'Ready for this, then?'
Hanssen glanced at it.
'I've already read the first part'.
Serena stared at him, wondering when on earth he had found time to read fifty pages of technical surgical text, but decided not to bother asking. She carried the folder over to the table, and sat back down with a sigh.
Despite herself, it was not long before Serena was engrossed. Hanssen – and Jac – had been right. The procedure was fascinating in both its brilliance and simplicity, and she had to admit that the information Jac had put together would not only be useful but was also very well explained. She gave a vague nod of thanks as Hanssen placed a cup of coffee by her elbow, and only realized that he was standing behind her and looking over her shoulder when his finger came down to point at something on the page. It was a section she had been reading over for a few minutes, not quite understanding where it fitted in.
'The fifth and last incision goes here, which allows access to the muscle via a laproscopic tube'.
'Ah, ok. Got it. So only five incisions?'
'Only five', Hanssen confirmed. He leaned over a little bit further to turn back a page, and rested his hand lightly on Serena's shoulder as he did so, sending a little tingle down her spine.
'The fourth one enables the surgeon to see the rest of the esophagus, which greatly reduces the risk of further tearing or bleeding. Here'. He pointed again, and Serena nodded, still conscious of his hand brushing the skin on her neck. Not for the first time, she thought what a good teacher Hanssen was. He had a way of explaining things that made them seem so obvious, you wondered why you hadn't understood in the first place. Of course, she thought wryly, in this case the fact that they were in such close proximity was maybe helping as well. She was almost disappointed when he pulled round the other chair and sat down next to her to read the rest from his own folder, but from the way her heart was beating, she reasoned it was probably for the best.
They read for almost two hours, only breaking the silence occasionally to ask the other a question or to get more water or coffee. Finally Serena closed the folder with a soft slap, and looked at it thoughtfully.
'You're right. That is amazing'. She drained the last of her coffee. 'No wonder Jac wanted to get her hands on this'.
Hanssen nodded, and Serena stood up, stretching her back and arms. She felt her shoulders groan as she did so, and thought again that she really should make time to get back to the pool and do some swimming. If she was not careful she would end up molded into the shape of a chair.
'So if this procedure goes well tomorrow Jac gets the funding, is that right?'
Hanssen gave her a sharp look.
'If the procedure goes well and if the board deems it a prudent investment – then yes. Funding will be allocated to set Holby up as a center in the UK'.
'At the expense of what?'
'That has not been decided yet'.
'Oh come on, Henrik'. She leaned against the table, deliberately sounding casual whilst reminding him of the fact that she had an MBA for a reason. 'This is me you're talking to. Funding doesn't just come out of nowhere. I haven't heard about any new sources, so that must mean it's coming from somewhere else'.
Hanssen sighed, and leaned back in his chair. For once, he was looking up at her and not the other way around.
'When it's decided, you will be the first to know'.
'Technically the second – since I'm assuming you'll be making that decision – but I suppose I'll take what I can get'. She wasn't really in the mood to press him on finance matters tonight. She would save that for another time.
They sat in silence again for a few minutes before Hanssen checked his watch and sighed quietly.
'I should go'. He stood up, but Serena noticed his hesitation.
'You don't have to'. She didn't say what she really meant, which was that suddenly she didn't want him to go. And from his lack of progress towards the door, she guessed that he didn't really want to go either.
'I'm not sure that staying is a good idea, Serena'. He was standing very close to her now, his voice quiet. He didn't meet her gaze, and impulsively she reached for his hand. She was very surprised when he didn't pull it away, but wound his fingers around hers.
'Terrible idea', she agreed, nodding. 'But surprisingly attractive'.
He brought his other hand up to gently touch her cheek, smiling as she took a sharp breath.
'This is not my strong point', he admitted, his fingers now running along her jaw, tracing the slight pink flush that she knew was spreading down her cheeks. He had to know the effect he was having on her.
'Oh, you're doing just fine'.
'Coming from you, I'll take that as a compliment'.
Serena smiled, knowing her reputation as an accomplished charmer. She had thought the flirting had been lost on him, but evidently she had been wrong.
'All for show, I'm afraid', she murmured. And unfortunately it was true, although she had no intention of admitting how long it had actually been since she followed through on any of it.
'Hmm'. Hanssen's hand dropped to the neckline of her blouse, running along her collarbone. 'And is there anything else about Serena Campbell that's just for show?'
Serena didn't reply. She had a horrible feeling he already knew the answer anyway, and instead shifted her position so that she was standing upright. It didn't help much. She had kicked her heels off a long time ago, and Hanssen was much taller than she was. She reached up and wrapped her free hand around his neck.
'Are you going to kiss me anytime soon?'
When his lips touched hers, she felt a warmth rush through her, felt the passion and intensity that she would never have dreamt could come from him. A small moan escaped her, and she pressed herself against him as his hands wrapped around her back, pulling her closer and upwards to meet him. When they finally broke apart, both breathless, she was grateful that he did not let her go. She wasn't sure she could have stayed upright.
'Wow', she purred quietly.
He smiled, a real smile again that seemed to change his face completely.
'Wow?'
'Umm-hmm'. Serena nodded. 'Although you could do it again, just to be sure. I might have got that wrong'.
As he obliged, she quickly decided that she hadn't made a mistake. And, unwise as it probably was, she really didn't want him to leave.
'We have to be at work in a few hours'.
He raised his eyebrows, and looked over at the clock. It was just gone midnight.
'Indeed', he murmured.
'Do you want to go?' Serena's question was typically direct, and he shook his head.
'Not really. But…this is maybe….'
'Reckless? Foolish? Rushing things?'
'All of the above'.
Serena nodded.
'You have, er…surprised me today', she admitted. 'Why? I thought you hated me'.
Hanssen looked surprised.
'It would be very hard to hate you'.
'Even when I tried to swipe your desk chair out from under you?'
Hanssen paused, thinking about his answer, and for once Serena waited patiently. She was genuinely curious.
'That was difficult. But I expected it at some point. Your intelligence and ambition might be a dangerous combination, but it's the reason I hired you'.
Serena nodded, trying to take it in.
'I wouldn't blame you, you know'. It was the closest she had ever come to admitting that she had, at times, overstepped the mark.
Hanssen shook his head. He looked slightly uncomfortable again, but Serena suspected that he would have been uncomfortable having personal conversations with anyone.
'You arouse a lot of strong feelings, Serena, but hate is not one of them'.
She looked up at him, not daring to ask what he meant, but he didn't elaborate. Taking a deep breath, she realised that there was no point in offering him the spare room. If he stayed, it would be in her bed, and he was right about not rushing. They were stepping into unchartered territory here, for both of them.
She walked with him into the hallway, watching as he pulled on his coat and found his car keys.
'So I'll see you in the morning?'
He nodded, and she reached up to kiss him again. When his car had finally disappeared out of the driveway, she found herself sinking to the floor against the front door. She felt shell-shocked, exhilarated, excited and terrified all at the same time, and she couldn't help wondering where on earth they would take it from here. Wherever it was, she only hoped he wouldn't regret it.