Lauren's P.O.V
25 whole days have passed by now and it feels like my mum died only yesterday. Closure isn't the easiest to find at the best of times, however it's times like these, when I'm on my own that it is the biggest struggle. My mind is working overtime as it has been the past weeks since her death and being alone really doesn't help. I feel like a burden talking to Abi about my fears and hopes, she wants to move on as much as the rest of us do. That has only lead to bottling up my feelings and crying myself to sleep. No one else would understand, how could they, most haven't felt the way I feel right now. I feel alone.
I haven't actually gone out of the house since the funeral. I can't even bring myself to look at the bench which we had put just over the road in memory of my mum. I wanted to know the whole kaleidoscope with my mother and I cannot stress how disappointed I am with myself for not being there sooner. Being an unsuccessful, unemployed, unmotivated waste of space that no one could be proud of, is my occupation.
I was taken out of my thoughts by soft calls from my dad, who had unsurprisingly, took a rather large fall throughout the process of the last few months.
"Lauren, Alice and Joey are here, babe. You going to come say hello?" He called through the door, knocking gently not to startle me.
Ah, yes. Alice and Joey, Uncle Derek's saints. I know they're my cousins but I can't help but envy the life they both portray. It is as if they are carefree. They both moved here a few weeks back just after the funeral. Uncle Derek insisted on a family meal, which was the very first time I saw them both, however how could it be family when the most important part of mine was gone? Alice did seem angelic and polite but a friendship, I think, would be too difficult. We are of such different natures. Joey, on the other hand, is quite like myself even if I hate to admit it. He is a player though, that definitely isn't me, I've had my fair share but I wouldn't class myself as a player. He's good with the banter and there is something about him, that calms me at the worst of times, he always knows the right thing to say. My trail of thoughts was again broken by my dad. I realized I hadn't replied.
"Lauren, come on, babe." He sighed sympathetically towards me.
"Yeah. I'll be down in a second." I mentally slapped myself for agreeing. Although I enjoyed Joey's company small talk with the rest of the family would be, as proved before hand, challenging.
Joey's P.O.V
I usually couldn't stand visiting Derek's family. Calling him dad and being a doting son is all in order to protect Alice. However, today was a different tale. The few times I have spent with Lauren, my cousin, I have actually felt like I belong somewhere. My uncle Max, and other cousins, are in fact some of the most welcoming people I have ever came across. It seems not every Branning is like the infamous Derek.
I feel as if I connect with Lauren in a way I find impossible with the best of people. Is this what having a cousin feels like? As she came down the stairs a few moments ago I could tell by the look in her eyes her grief has once more overtook her thoughts. I can't imagine not being able to turn to my mum, although she had a breakdown and Alice and I don't see her half as much as we'd like to, knowing she isn't here would without a doubt be mortifying to us.
"Hello, beautiful." I smirked to Lauren, as she allowed the corners of her mouth to react slightly in an upward direction, supplying a small smile. I understand that this godsend before me is my cousin but she is rather attractive to be bluntly honest.
"Hey, Joe" She replied, falling into my now open arms, as I embraced her in a hug which I longed for. I could tell by the way Lauren relaxed when in my embrace that she didn't feel all that different.
"How is my beautiful little cousin doing then, eh?" I asked mentally wincing at the word 'cousin'. She doesn't feel like a cousin.
Lauren's P.O.V
Joey is the best. The way he says his words can be so relaxing. Much like when he wraps his long, muscular, arms around my waist as he pulls me flush against his rock hard chest. Just because he's my cousin doesn't mean I can't think he's hot. In theory, I probably shouldn't think that, but what's stopping me?
"All good, I suppose. Just the same you know." I admitted, slightly regretting it, he knew I wasn't coping deep down. Even though I feel like I can talk to him, I haven't knew him for that long, I don't want to be a burden to him. The last thing I want is to lose more family members, it's unbelievable how much things have changed without my mum, I couldn't bare to lose anyone else. Even losing Uncle Derek, who I do hate with a passion, would be devastating to me right now.
"Good, now come on, Al wants to see you" Joey confessed whilst his outstretched arm became a cage around my shoulders.
After some light banter and small talk exchanged between the group consisting of Dad, Abi, Oscar, Nan, Derek, Carol, Alice, Joey and myself, everyone, apart from our now family of once again five, left us alone. Nan moved in about a week ago. She complained about not having enough money and everyone so far has found it beneficial having an extra pair of hands helping around the house. Nan has also taken on the Salon for my mum, along with Poppy. Together the pair seem to manage just fine.
Joey's P.O.V
Whilst round Uncle Max's house earlier, much to my delight, he offered me a job. So from tomorrow morning I am going to be helping out, he says he's being trying to get rid of a KA which has been on the forecourt since before Christmas, so presumably that will be where I begin.
A/N
Thank you for the reviews so far. I appreciate them so much. I will post one more chapter tomorrow morning and may squeeze one in at the weekend, who knows, I'm not promising anything.
I hope I didn't disappoint anyone I feel as if I have expectations to meet now, haha.
The scene tonight in the bedroom was so good, it's been so long, I couldn't stop smiling. They need to have more moments with those two together like that. I was kind of hoping Joey might drop that dressing gown ;)
Please review :) X