Kendall's P.O.V.
The day started off bad…and then went good. And then bad to worse. The only good thing about this day has been finding out I'm going to live past 50. Everything else just…kind of…sucks. I guess I shouldn't say everything. I did have Logan. I had him on my lap, in my arms, tracing my heart tattoo on my right shoulder under my thin long sleeved shirt. It felt amazing knowing they were his fingertips. And it made me smile like a moron knowing he knew exactly how big the ink was so well he didn't need to look at it. He's always know everything about me, just like I've always known everything about him. Like when he was lying.
I know what James told me. He came onto my husband. Again. And with just hearing it form James, I knew that was highly possible. But when I told Logan, he gave himself away right quick. Whenever he doesn't talk, doesn't acknowledge you, he's probably about to lie to you, or has already lied to you. He only nodded his head once, agreeing with me that we'd deal with it later. I didn't want to deal with it now but I was starting to realize I had no choice.
He heard the fast footsteps first. He pushed up off my shoulder, and turned his head around. I followed his gaze and we both stood up quick. Carlos was walking, tall and strong looking with Chris behind him. I frowned and gently squeezed Logan's hip, getting in front of him. "I thought I told you to stay at his house?" Chris didn't move or say anything, just stood behind Carlos, looking at Logan behind me. "Where…"
"They are with Claire" Carlos looked up to me and a stupid big grin started to tug at his mouth. I frowned and felt a hand slip into my back pocket of my jeans. I felt a head lay on my shoulder and glanced to see Chris staring down Logan, not looking happy at all. "Okay so were not going to even talk about you begin cancer free?!" I was shoved by my other shoulder by Carlos and I smiled looking down at him. "Dude! That's amazing news!"
"Well I'm not clear yet. A couple months Los." He shook his head and moved forward wrapping his arms undermine around my torso. I laughed and hugged him back glaring at Chris. He looked away quick and turned sitting in a chair. I pulled away from Carlos and he was back to begin serious.
"How's Maggie?" I sighed and reached back taking Logan's hand out of my pocket and holding it tight. I had us all sit down, me right next to Chris, Logan on the other side. Carlos sat across form us, leaning on his knees looking at Logan. "You okay dude?" I turned to Logan and just pure sadness washed over his face. I squeezed his hand and rubbed my thumb over his skin, making him only nod. I sighed and turned back to Carlos.
"She's going to have to stay here for a while. She's on suicide watch." The words burned coming out of my mouth and looked to Chris. He was staring at the ground, both hands in his jacket pockets, bad attitude written all over his face. "Did you know about this?" He turned to me quick and I raised my eyebrows. "Did you know she's been doing this for a while?"
"No. I saw her last night, and told you this morning. How long has she been doing it?" I frowned but continued giving him a death stare.
"We don't know." He turned away quick scoffing and I clenched my hands, hearing a gasp from Logan. He looked down at our hands quick and I loosened his hand. "I love you." He pushed into me quick and laid his head in the crook of my neck. I saw Carlos sit back looking at a magazine and heard, right next to me, Chris's seat moving. I turned and saw him standing up and walking away, quickly. "Christopher." He ignore me completely. I groaned and stood up, leaving Logan in his seat. Just as I started walking after Chris James walked in. He spotted Chris and reached out to stop him from Walking but Chris shoved him off and walked out of the hospital. I picked up speed and locked eyes with James who looked confused. I ran past him and outside back into the cold searching for Chris. He was sitting on a bench just by the door and I walked to him huffing. "Are you kidding me? You're going to throw a 5 year old tantrum." He didn't look up at me just locked his jaw in place and watched an ambulance pull up. "Okay, if this is how you're going to act, you can stay out here." I started walking back to the door seeing Carlos, Logan and James starting at us and I turned back to Chris quick. "Oh and you're like so grounded. No car, no phone and no girls." He stood up quick and walked to me mouth wide open.
"What did I do?!" I got right in front of him and grabbed behind his neck, pulling him towards the other three. "I don't want to see him!" He shoved out of my grasps and I saw Logan turn away closing his eyes, hurt. "He's the reason Maggie's in here!" I stared down at him and he was breathing hard. "If he hadn't had left last night she wouldn't have tried to kill herself!" I saw Logan walk away quickly and Carlos run after him. "And if you two had been paying attention to anyone else besides yourselves you would have noticed how fucked up she is!"
"Your sister has been fighting her own demons Chris! This is no one's fault except the people who are making her feel ugly and making her feel worthless!" His shoulder's fell and I walked towards him, calming down. "Your father walked in on her in the bathtub unresponsive. She was bleeding from her wrists, Chris, to take her own life. She has a page in a journal with ugly written all over it." His face turned sad very quick and I stepped even closer to him. "You were way out of line for saying what you did, especially to your dad." He put his head down and I shook my head. "Go make it right Chris." He didn't look up to me, just turned and walked quickly into the hospital. I saw James look after him and slowly follow in. He wasn't getting away that easy. I followed after James and made sure Chris actually went to Logan I stopped, clearing my throat. "James." I could have sworn I saw James cringed before stopping and turning to me. I slowly walked up to him and checked on the other two over his shoulder before looking up at his face. I must have looked "terrifying" because he pulled his beanie off his head quick and shook his head.
"I don't want to fight Kendall okay…I'm sorry…"
"It was him wasn't it?" He paused and I put my hands in my pockets. "He kissed you didn't he?"
"No…Kendall it was all me."
"I understand if you're doing this because you want to protect him because you think I'll…lose my mind or something but, if you were really my friend and really were Logan's friend…you'd tell me the truth right now." I watched his Adams apple bob up and down quick before he licked his lips and closed his eyes and groaned out.
"Yeah…it was him." I didn't feel any anger, but it didn't make me feel better about the situation. "It was for a second, before I pushed him back. When I did push him away, he broke down. Just…shaking and sobbing, saying over and over how bad he messed up." I pulled my eyes away from James to look over his shoulder at Logan and Chris. Logan was sitting up straight, hands folded in his lap, looking hopefully at Chris who wouldn't look at him. "I told him I'd lie, not to be malicious but…" I glanced back at James and he shrugged. "Logan loves you Kendall. And you're kids. He was scared he was going to lose you. He was scared he'd have to face this world alone."
"I…I know James." He loosened up a bit and I ran a hand over my bald head. "I appreciate you letting him…I appreciate you begin a good friend." He nodded and smiled small looking down at the ground. "Not just to him James. You've been great to me these past few months. Helping with the kids when we need it. You're a great friend, and a good guy." He looked up quick and I moved in to hug him. Over his shoulder I saw Logan standing and staring at us, worried, and then confused when we hugged. I smiled at him and patted James back. "Now I have to go deal with my moody teenager." He laughed huskily in my ear and pulled away patting my shoulder. We both started walking towards the three in the waiting room, none talking, just as a doctor walked out. Logan quickly walked to him and I got right behind him, putting hand on the back of his neck squeezing it gently.
"Mr. Knight…Maggie is doing great." Logan sighed out, in relief and turned into me hugging me. "The cuts were deep, the left wrist worse than the right. We were able to close them up,38 stiches all together. I have a morphine drip in her arm for the pain. It's not going to be an easy recovery and she won't be able to use her wrists that much. We do have her on a suicide watch. 72 hours and after that, we'll see where her pain is and go from there." I nodded and held Logan close feeling a wet spot forming on my shirt right under his eye.
"Can we see her?" The doctor smiled big and nodded. I sighed and turned back to see Carlos a few feet behind us, looking at us hopeful. Chris was standing behind James and when the doctor started to walk away he walked forward. I gently nudged Logan along and turned to Chris stopping him. "Sit your ass down." He stopped quick and looked up at me. "Did you talk to him?" He shook his head and I nodded. I turned to James and pointed to Chris. "Watch him." I left quick, following behind Logan and the doctor who were quietly talking and walking slow. I caught up not looking back at my son and sighed following quietly. Logan was asking medical questions that I could care less about. I just wanted to see her, and make sure she was okay. And when the doctor turned down a hall and stopped in front of a half open door, my stomach flipped. He led us in and waited by the door holding it open. He said he's give us some time and left quietly shutting the door softly. Logan walked over to her bed quick and got on the right side. She was looking up at the TV showing some ridiculous reality show about famous and wealthy people. I stayed where I was standing and watched Maggie close her eyes and turn her head completely away from Logan. He sighed and glanced to me. He looked back down at her and wiped under his eye.
"How you feeling Maggie?" She reopened her eyes and I caught them, not letting her look away. She let a few tears fall down, seeing me and I slowly walked forward. "Sweetheart…why-why would you do this?" Logan cautiously sat down on the edge of the bed and I stopped right by the other side looking down at her still. "Mags…"
"I can't tell you guys." I frowned and blindly pulled a chair up, next to her sighing.
"You can tell us anything Maggie." Logan brushed hair off her forehead and she shook her head. "Maggie you need to tell us. I saw…" He stopped looking up at me and I nodded. "I saw your journal." She turned to him quick and he got closer to her, running a hand through her hair. "Relax…we just need to know what's going on Maggie Jane. You know you can tell us anything." She closed her eyes and bit her bottom lip, shaking her head. Logan sighed and shrugged. "Okay, if you don't tell us, you're going to tell a psychiatrist." She opened her eyes looking at him and I smiled sitting back. Logan was back to normal, being the good dad i knew he was.
"Okay…I'll…this is really hard for me to talk about." I reached up quick and rubbed her forearm, avoiding the white bandage around her wrist.
"Take your time sweetheart." She looked between Logan and I and sighed out, putting her head back and closing her eyes.
"Sophomore year I started getting bullied." I tensed up and watched her flutter her eyes open. "I guess…I've been bullied for a while, just not to my face. When your parents are rich pop stars who happen to be gay people look at you different." I sat back a little and continued rubbing her arm. "The first time someone said anything to me was my first day of sophomore year. I was walking to my locker after Chris and I got to school. I was by myself, like I usually I am." I cringed and looked down, not knowing if I wanted to hear this. "When I opened my locker I was reaching up to put my backpack inside and I was shoved." I looked back up quick and saw her staring at my hand on her arm. "It was three girls, all in Chris's class. The one who pushed me actually…is dating Chris right now."
"Lily Quinn?" Both Maggie and Logan turned to me an di cleared my throat, sitting up. "I met her at Chris's last game."
"She's a peach aint she?" I frowned and moved forward putting my hand on her cheek. "No I don't blame you or Chris for that matter. She's a pretty blond bag of bitch." I saw Logan sigh and put his head in his hand still looking down at Maggie. "She is. That first day, wasn't the last that she pushed me. Or anything for that matter. If she wasn't calling me a mean name, or knocking books out of my hands, she was tripping me, making other people push me around." I saw Logan turn away closing his eyes and biting his bottom lip.
"Maggie why wouldn't you tell anyone? Why didn't you come to us?"
"Because daddy…I thought I could handle it myself, and I was. For a while I just ignored her and she stopped. But she never really did stop. She would talk bad about me to random kids at school and suddenly, no one was talking to me. No one sat with me at lunch and I was alienated real quick." She moved a hand up quick to wipe away a tear and she hissed in pain form her wrist and the IV in her left arm, so put it down quick. Logan moved in and wiped the tears for her. "All of that I was fine with. I just didn't care. I was too busy with my schoolwork to even worry about having friends or a boyfriend. Until Lily started dating Chris." She turned to me and smiled small. "When we came back from the summer and he started senior year, his friends convinced him to ask her out. They've been dating since then and because she's dating my brother, suddenly she's more important in his life, and I'm not sure how, but she even got him to stop talking to me. I would be by myself at lunch and he'd walk by with her and wouldn't even say hi to me like he usually did." My anger was growing quick and I had to stand so I wouldn't explode sitting down, so I started pacing. I probably could have wrung Chris's neck, but I knew Logan wouldn't let me. "She convinced my brother not to even say we were related. I know…I know he saw me that day." I turned to her quick and Logan perked up.
"What day Maggie?" She looked over at him and I saw her bottom lip quiver. "Maggie you're doing so good. Your begin very brave but you need to tell us everything." He held her face gently and she sobbed out closing her eyes.
"Lily and some of her friends, girls and boys, cornered me. They knocked my books out of my hands, my bag off my shoulder and she…she had one of the guys…" She stopped and tried covering her face but Logan took her hand and held it. "She had one of the guys hit me." My knees suddenly couldn't hold my weight up and I walked to the other side of her bed and put a hand on her head. "They all laughed when I fell to the floor and my lip started bleeding. Lily had a bottle of water and dumped it on my head. Thy all stood above me laughing and taunting me…" She glanced to me and shrugged, calming down her crying. "I pushed myself up, grabbed all of my things and ran to my car. I swear I saw Chris leaving the boys locker room, and I know he saw me. We stared at each other, but Lily walked up to him and he shrugged me off, walking her to her car." Both Logan and I wiped away her tears and she laid back sighed out hard and breathing in through her nose, slowly. "This was about a month ago. I never said anything because you guys have been going through so much, and I'm sorry for everything I said to you this morning daddy." I moved down quick and pulled her up for a tight big hug.
"I'm sorry I yelled at you. I was scared for you Mags." She nodded into my neck and held her hand sup around my back weakly. I turned my head slightly, sitting on her bed and looked at Logan. He looked on the verge of breaking down, but ran a hand through her hair and forced a smile. "I'm going to go have a little talk with Chris…" I started pulling away but she grabbed my shirt and held me as tight as she could.
"Daddy you can't say anything to him!" I pulled her away and pushed her back down on her bed gently.
"Oh I'm sorry…are you the parent now?"
"Kendall?" I looked over at Logan who sighed, bent down kissing her head and standing up. "Can I speak to you outside for a minute? We'll be right back Mags." Maggie looked worried when I was pulled out but I ignored her. I was pulled out quick, and stopped in the middle of the hallway letting him close the door and stand in front of me crossing his arms over my chest. I put my hands on my hips and he sighed out, rubbing his forehead with one hand. "I'm the worst parent in the world." I frowned and moved toward shim kissing the top of his head that was still down. "You cannot talk to Chris is she doesn't want you too. It will only make her keep more things hidden and never trust us. We need to move around this slowly and carefully. This is a very delicate situation." I sighed and he looked up at me. "How did no one at school see this happening? How did everyone ignore her like that? She's the most amazing person on the planet." I smiled and nodded in agreement. "How could I have not seen the signs Kendall?"
"She didn't want us to know Loges. She is a pro hider. She gets it form you." He frowned and I slowly moved my hands out to him and held his sides pulling him into me. "You're going to be here with her alone tomorrow." He pushed away quick and gave me a weird look. "They want to do my second round of treatment tomorrow. I have to do it." He opened his mouth to protest but I stopped him, covering his mouth quick and softly. "I also have to stay a few days, so they can watch my progress and check over it, I guess. I know it sucks, and I know there is a lot we need to talk about but…" He pulled my hand down roughly, moved closer and got on his tippy toes. I felt his small warm little lips brush against mine. One of his arms hooked around the back of my neck pulling me even more towards him, making me lose my footing. I stumbled forward and we fell back into the wall by Maggie's door. It didn't even bother me however, because his lips parted and he let my tongue dance on the inside of his mouth. It had been quite a while since we've kissed like this, hell even touched like this. His free hand moved down over my chest on to my flat stomach before going to my black leather belt buckle and gripping onto it, pulling my hips forward, crashing them against his own. If I had my way, I would have taken him right then and there. But he pulled away from me, turning his head, letting me rest my head on the side of his. I squeezed my eyes shut, gasping for air feeling my lungs on fire. "What…what was that for?" His hand around the back of my neck moved up and rubbed over my bald head. He breathe din hard, and exhaled calmly and slowly.
"You…you are going to be cancer free Kendall. It hasn't really hit me since, like right now, hearing you talk about it. I'm so happy I could…burst."
"Please don't burst." I kissed his cheek quick before he turned and faced me smiling. I put my palms on his hips and put my forehead on his. "We need to talk to Chris. I know Maggie will be upset but we need…"
"I know…we should…right now." I locked eyes with him and slowly nodded.
SO…I APOLOGIZE FOR THIS BEING SO LONG. IT LITERALLY TOOK ALL DAY FOR ME TO WRITE. IT WAS HARD. IT WAS HARD TO WRITE UP MAGGIE'S STORY BUT I GOT THROUGH IT AND I HOPE…IT'S OKAY.