For: CheeseCrazy

Rating: T

Characters: Kisame, Tonton (the pig) and Shizune

Genre: Humour

Pairings: One-sided KisaTon. Oh dear god, hahaha.

Kisame finds a pig in a bush. Love ensues.

Kisame strolled down the streets of Konoha, minding his own business. To prevent detection, he had transformed into a woman. Although 'she' was very muscular, blue, and basically exactly the same as him but with a vagina, he was sure he wouldn't get caught. He hoped.

Oink.

Kisame paused, and turned his head towards the noise.

Silence.

The blue-nin continued on until he heard it again. Louder.

What the hell?

Kisame made his way through the street, heading towards a large bush. The noise had definitely gotten louder. He parted the many branches and stared into the hidden part of the large plant.

"Oink.."

Kisame's face went slack as his mouth parted open slightly. He couldn't stare directly at the beauty, it hurt too much. He could feel his mind cloud over any thoughts that didn't relate to this glorious pig in any way.

"…You're beautiful!" Kisame exclaimed, an innocent blush flushed over his gilled cheeks. The pig snorted in agreement and retreated further into the bush, almost as if she was harpooning the shark-man in.

Although it was an extremely tight fit, Kisame managed to merge into the bush with his new lover.

"What's your name?" Kisame mumbled nervously, his hand's fidgeted with stray leaves.

"…Oink," the pig grumbled before crawling into Kisame's lap to snooze.

The shark-nin's eye's widened profusely as he stared at the pig in awe. Did she not wait until after the first date!? He couldn't believe how bold the pig was being, sitting on his lap! Kisame felt his face burn before seeing stars in his eyes.

"….Tonton!"

Kisame felt himself tense up with anxiety as the pig snuggled into his lap.

"Tonton!"

Kisame's head shot up when light intruded into their secluded bush area. As his eyes adjusted to the light, a woman's face popped up into his vision. A very distraught woman's face. Her short black bangs framed her perplexed face, her nose was scrunched up in confusion. Time ticked slowly as they continued to stare at each other, waiting for the other to make the first move. Suddenly the woman backed away before swiftly placing poisonous needles between each of her fingers.

"Who are you?" She began, raising her arm to prepare for an attack. "What are you doing with Tonton!?"

Kisame just continued to stare at her before realising that she wanted the pig. His pig. The shark-nin's face contorted from shock to a full blown anger. There was no way he'd allow his beauty to be snatched away from such a witch!

"She's mine!" Kisame cried, cradling the pink pig protectively. "She's called Oink!"

Shizune directed a look of bewilderment towards the shark-man's direction before watching him tuck-and-roll out of the bush with a gaping mouth. He securely placed the pig under his arm and then ran towards the sunset. Which wasn't cliché at all, it just happened to be a sunny evening by coincidence.

I've written alot of weird shit in my time, but this just felt wrong. LMAO.
Haven't proof read so sorry for mistakes.
Reviews pwease? *u* ...