For: Stan5

Rating: T

Characters: Kisame, Mei (Mizukage), Sanji the bartender (lmao)

Genre: Romance, Humour? I dunno, haha.

Pairings: KisaMei

Kisame tries to win over the Mizukage with some drastic consequences.

(Hope it's alright, it took me a while to come up with something half decent. Sorry if it didn't live up to your expectations of a lovey story, Stan5. I'll get better LOL.)

Mei chugged on her glass of sake, tilting her head a whole 90 degrees as if she was desperate to drain the whole glass. She then slammed the now empty cup onto the table before forcing a grin at the slightly aghast bartender.

"I-I suppose you'd like another, Mizukage-sama?"

Her grin twitched as she replied to the podgy man. "I've told you before, drop the honorifics around here," her face twisted in annoyance as the man bowed in apology. "And yes, I'd like another one, thank you."

She drilled her blue fingernails on the wooden surface, making a steady beat in attempt to distract herself from her own thoughts. She should be doing something amazing right now. Like a romantic date with a hot guy. Or walk on the beach with a hot guy. Or she could be marrying a hot guy. Mei choked on her own spit at the impulsive thought. She'd finally hit thirty. Her thirtieth birthday. She was so old! And lonely! Everyone her age had settled down already! And where was she? Nowhere. Her grip tightened on the empty glass, just shards from breaking it.

"That'll be 400 yen, Mizukage-sama."

The sudden voice broke her self-loathing thoughts before she stared at sake glass. She then reached into her pouch for the bill.

Which was empty.

Ah, shit.

"Sorry Sanji, I've ran out…" Mei pulled a sheepish grin, before twirling the long strand of hair that rested on her shoulder. She knew Sanji would let her have the glass anyway, but she still felt genuinely guilty. He'd been having financial problems that were beyond her control so she'd always pop up now and then for a drink.

A blue hand abruptly placed his hand on the bar table in front of Mei, dropping coins on the surface. She glanced sideways at the stranger with confusion.

"You can't let an attractive lady pay for her own drinks," the shark man began. "Especially if she's the Mizukage."

Words failed to form in her head as she processed what the man had said. He had spikey, blue hair with the same colour skin but paler. Three gills rested on both sides of his cheeks and wore a cheeky toothy grin which was directed at herself. She smirked in reply as she glanced down at the shark man. She could tell he was pretty muscular. Actually, that would have been an understatement. She wanted to suddenly wrap her hands around his upper arms, just to measure how large they were.

"Ahem…"

Mei looked back up to meet the shark man's eyes, a blush spread across her cheeks. She needed a drink. Now.

Kisame grinned at the reaction he had conjured from the Mizukage. Ha, with the way this was going, Itachi would have to owe him 10,000 yen. Well, Itachi didn't really agree to it, he just stood there and stared stoically at the shark as he rambled about winning over the Mizukage. He didn't want to admit it to his partner, but the bet was a façade. He did indeed genuinely want to win over the woman. Scratch that, Itachi probably already knew. The sly bastard!

Kisame watched as the Mizukage grinned and pursed her lips to sip the sake. She kept eye contact with him as she did so, and licked her lips seductively before placing the glass down gently on the table.

"Your name?" she smiled at him before subtly fluttering her eyelashes.

"Kisame."

She looked him over once more, before coming to a resounding conclusion. He was so fucking attractive. She didn't understand why she thought that, he looked like a goddamn shark for Christ sake! But a sexy shark… She shook her head, cursing the alcohol that coursed through her veins. She picked up her glass before gulping it down like it was her last drink on earth. She closed her eyes, her vision already swaying from the liquid.

Kisame attracted the attention of the bartender to refill the Mizukage's cup. After he'd done so, she automatically reached for the glass before draining it in five seconds flat.

"Another!" She hiccupped, her cheeks burned red.

"Can you really handle all of them that fast?" Kisame questioned as he watched the woman intoxicate herself. His eyes widened when he heard a disheartened sob escape from the woman's lips.

"O-Oi, are you ok-"

"Kisame!" She pounced onto the large man, burying herself into his chest. Sobs echoed throughout the bar, most people ignoring the scene. The bartender shared a look of sympathy with Kisame, his eyes reflecting that this probably happened a lot.

"Marry me!"

Kisame drained in colour as he stared at the desperate woman.

"EY!?"

"I don't want to die alone!" Grief welled up in her eyes before escaping down her cheeks.

Kisame just sat there, allowing himself to be mauled by the Mizukage. Well, he didn't expect this. It was too easy. Too bizarre. All he wanted to do was to win a date with the woman. Instead he ended up being her crying pillow. In any case, a win was a win. And what kind of man doesn't comfort a woman in her time of need? Right?

Kisame was pretty much covered in tears and snot by the time he passed her unconscious body on to someone else to take her home. He guessed he could use it as evidence that he dated the Mizukage. Kind of. Now where was his 10,000 yen…

Reviews cheer my day! ;_;
Hope it was okay.. lmao.
Requests being taken! I like seeing everyone's ideas. :P
Haven't proof read, sorry for mistakes.