Rating: M

Disclaimer: Stephanie Meyers owns all things Twilight - I just like to get weird with her characters.

A/N…Much love and thanks to my beta LovinRob for all of her encouragement and hard work on this story! Without her OCD and her cock/pussy thesaurus, this fic would be a hot mess of past and present tense and the word erection used repeatedly…

Many thanks to AmandaC3 for creating the marvelous banner for this story and the Togaward bonus banner. I wouldn't believe it was possible – but she made Rob hotter by wrapping him in pink bed sheets…

This update comes early as I have to pack for our three day trip to Chicago. Utterly amazed by the amount of stuff I have out to take for a family of six including a set of newborn twins. You would think we're going on a trip around the world - pure ridiculousness I tell you. So, let's see how our girl is doing the morning after...

Chapter 7 – Confessions

I woke up at 8:00 AM with what would have been the worst hangover known to man if my body wasn't still physically vibrating with the memories from last night. I tried to shower and dress quickly in hopes that I could grab a beverage to help me keep my eyes open before my lab this morning. No such luck, but with the spare 5 minutes I had before I trudged to class I decided to reacquaint myself with the outside world via Facebook. Pathetic, only one notification letting me know Rosalie posted on my wall.

Wall post from Rosalie Hale to Bella Swan

Bells, Tan and I will meet you at the Starbucks in the union at 11:30 ish. NO EXCUSES!

Ugh, this has all the signs of an ambush, in my experience with Tanya/Rosalie information seeking tactics, nonchalance is always the best way to go so I hit that comment button.

Bella Swan: Sure thing dolls, I get out of my lab at 11, so I will be there with bells on.

I quickly scroll down to see what else is going on with my peeps when I notice Edward had posted a status early this morning.

Wall post – Edward Cullen

Loads of fun – laundry might be my new obsession.

4 people like this

I giggle and click on the comments, almost positive that Tyler would add some humourous commentary.

Comments:

Tyler Crowley: Yeah, I'll bet it is.

Heidi Hunter: OMG Eddie... Exactly how drunk were you when you wrote this?

Esme Platt-Cullen: So glad to hear of your new obsession, I take it you won't be bringing it home for me to do this weekend, then?

I can't help but roll my eyes at Heidi's comment. Apparently in my drunken haze I forgot about their situation. I feel slightly guilty, but I can't help but feel a little more confident given the thinly veiled reference to our laundry room tryst being put on blast. With that thought, I shut my laptop and make my way to class.

Sitting through the lab is painful. I try my hardest to follow along, but my current condition and four day self-imposed exile proved harmful to academic excellence. Note to self, hit the books this weekend, Swan!

I make my way to the Starbucks, checking my cell phone to see if the interrogation is still on. So far, no word from Rose or Tanya, so I guess I'm not off the hook. I jump in line, inhaling the deliciousness and debating on whether my stomach is strong enough for hot chocolate and a pastry. After deciding it is, I make my way to the counter and place my order. The barista swipes my card and hands it back to me grumbling a thank you. Apparently smiles aren't free today.

"Mike, over here!" I hear a girlish squeal across the coffee shop.

I glance over and see a petite girl with curly, brown hair waving her arms enthusiastically. Perhaps I am still heavily intoxicated, but suddenly everything morphed into slow motion as I see Mike saunter over to her and her steaming cups of coffee with a great big smile on his face. She stands up and pulls him into a hug. From my vantage point, it looks as though she is trying to get him into her kung-fu grip, while Mike is giving her the "church hug". You know, the ass out, two pats on the back, "God be with you and also with you" hug.

I need to look away, eat the $7.00 cost of a delicious beverage and tasty treat and make tracks. Unfortunately, Brian the Bitch Barista makes escaping a virtual impossibility. While he is unable to utter an intelligible "thank you", he makes up for it in spades by yelling my name across the shop at full volume, making sure to annunciate each syllable of my name.

Mike's shoulders tense and he slowly looks over his shoulder at me. I'm almost positive that the shocked expression on my face matches his. Unable to hide my unease, I nodded my head at the barista.

"That's me." I say.

All of a sudden Bitchy Brian is all smiles, even adding a "Have a great day" as he hands me my drink and pastry.

I push down the urge to give him the finger, suck in a breath and turn to face Mike and his new, friend. He is still looking at me, waiting to see if I will approach. I can't help but notice that the church hug embrace is a bit tighter, a bit more possessive. I also can't help but notice Curly Sue's smug grin.

"Uh, hey… Bella." Mike stutters nervously, eyeing me like a cheating spouse on the Jerry Springer Show.

"Hey Mike." I reply feigning nonchalance and failing miserably.

An uncomfortable silence washes over us, so my curly doppelganger decides to intervene.

"Hi! I'm Jessica by the way." She blurts, extending her hand.

I go in for the awkward handshake and am not too terribly surprised that the brunette sprite goes for the power play, gripping my hand a little more firmly than necessary with a few too many shakes to punctuate her point. Mike must have noticed her teeth barring grin morphed into that of Bruce the Shark from Finding Nemo and decides to intervene.

"Uh, yeah, this is Jess. Jess, this is Bella." He says waving his hand between us.

"Oh," recognition coloring her face and her smug grin returning as she releases my hand, "so nice to meet you… Bella."

I clear my throat and mumble, "Likewise."

I then turn my gaze back to Mike whose expression is a healthy mix between mortification and vindication when he suddenly realizes that he has the upper hand here. He smiles a shit eating grin as Jess intertwines her hand in his.

"Jess and I were just having a coffee date." He explains looking down at her to smile as if to say thanks for playing along.

More than happy to oblige, Jessica shrugs her shoulders and adds, "Again" in a sing-song voice that loosely translates to nana nana boo boo, stick your head in doo doo.

I nod my head and may have thrown a thumbs up backing away. "Well, I'll let you two get back to it then." I stammer through my hasty retreat, when suddenly I feel a hand on my lower back.

"There you are, sorry I am late. Did you already order?" The velvety smooth voice of my savior inquires, placing a soft kiss on the top of my head.

I look up to confirm that Edward is in fact beside me and attempting to even the score so to speak. He has an easy smile on his face, but his green irises are communicating for me to play along. I nod slowly before getting my wits together. I smile widely at my friend

"Hey, yeah, I already ordered. Sorry, I couldn't remember your drink entirely and I didn't want to screw it up."

His lips pull into his crooked smirk, seemingly impressed by my improvisation skills. He looks over at Mike and Jess and gives them a dazzling smile. He nods his head at Mike and Jess, apparently this is my cue to introduce him.

"Edward, this is Mike and… Jessica, was it?" I play dumb, nothing like making someone feel insignificant to boost your self-esteem right? I could have called her by the wrong name, but I thought that wouldn't be as subtle.

Edward extends his hand to Jessica first, her wrist noticeably daintier than the five finger smack down she inflicted on my hand minutes before. Now, I can't be sure, but I think I audibly hear Jessica's panties soak. Her jaw is slack and she is a lip lick away from her expression being regarded as a seductive stare.

Edward deftly slides his hand from her grip and focuses his attention on Mike. His confidence never falters as he extends his hand once again, regarding Mike kindly with a gentle smile that could have been construed two ways. One, just a genuine pleasure to meet you or two, I dry humped your ex-girlfriend on a dryer last night and I am pretty sure if I had two more minutes, she would have come. Mike clearly took it to mean option two as he forcefully grips Edward's hand, giving him a tight lipped smile. Growing increasingly uncomfortable, I tug on Edward's coat.

"Hey, let's go place your order and let these two get back to their coffee date." I suggest noting Jessica's pleasure that I acknowledged Mike was here, with her, on a date. "I'll see you around Mike," I add sweetly, "so nice to meet you Jessica."

They give us faint waves as I continue tugging a smirking Edward back to the line. We stand side-by-side in line in silence for a few moments; the desire to take his hand in mine is overwhelming. I keep my expression passive, wanting to give nothing away, only a small Mona Lisa smile to keep him guessing.

"So… Are you stalking me, Cullen?" I inquire casually.

He laughs lightly looking down at his feet, replying coyly, "You wish, Swan. Your whereabouts were all over Facebook this morning."

I nod, quickly countering, "Ah, yes. I did put that out there, much like your newfound passion for laundry, right?"

He smiles broadly and nods as if to say "Touché, Swan, touché." He places his order with bi-polar Brian the Barista who appears to have a man-crush on my coffee date. We quickly find a seat as far away from Mike and Jess as humanly possible as Edward seems to sense my discomfort when he first begins inching towards their side of the room.

We sit in a comfortable silence for a few moments, prepping our food for consumption. I can't help but be nervous sitting across from this unbelievably gorgeous man. Much like they say on Sesame Street, one of these things is not like the other. Clearly sensing my discomfort, he scoots his seat up, places his forearms on the table and folds his hands together. He clears his throat, but his voice still comes out husky and unsure.

"So, you guys are done, right?"

His eyes are fixated on his hands, not daring to look up at me. I am puzzled; he gave no indication ever that he was aware of my situation. I am sure he heard things here and there from Emmett and Tyler, but something about the way he asked the question makes me think he knows more than he is letting on.

"Uh, yeah, we're done" I admit to him and myself with finality. "It's just still kind of fresh and awkward and just, you know…" I trail off.

Still starring at his hands, he softly mumbles, "He didn't deserve you."

For some reason I feel the need to come to Mike's defense giving the table a small rap to get his attention.

"Hey," I warn as he finally looks up at me, "you have no idea what you are talking about. This was on me."

His jaw tightens and his eyes narrow, his voice drops an octave lower and he leans forward.

"I was there, Bella," he replies slowly, "and I heard every fucking word."

He sits back as if to let it sink in. My expression must show my confusion.

"Who do you think called Tanya, Bella? Didn't you ask yourself how she knew where to find you?"

I close my eyes, piecing together the puzzle as he answers the questions I never thought to ask. Mortified that he saw what I was capable of and how pathetic I must have sounded begging for him to come back after he had cut me down to size. I put my face in my hands, willing the earth to swallow me whole. I can feel the table shift and suddenly his hands are on mine, pulling them away from my face. Thankfully I haven't burst into tears, though I am sure my face is flushed with embarrassment.

He furrows his brow and speaks soothingly, "This wasn't on you, Bella. You aren't wrong for wanting more than what he was willing to give. He wasn't listening to a word you said, you know that things would have never changed, right?"

I nod slightly. "Doesn't matter though, I lied. I lied for years. But I swear I didn't want to hurt his feelings, I promise, I never ever wanted him to hurt."

My confession is desperate and pleading, gripping his hands hoping my sincerity would ring true. We are silent for a few moments, hands still intertwined, mine only trembling slightly. I take a few calming breaths. A piece of hair falls in my eye and I try to blow it out of my face, not wanting to relinquish the death grip I have on his hands. He let's go and gently brushes it behind my ear, quickly taking my hand back in his.

Unable to meet my eyes again, he quietly asks, "Do you still love him?"

I release his hands and wrap my arms around myself. I have been asking myself this for days. I blow out a deep breath and look out at the bustling quad through the window.

"Yes and no." I answer softly. "Yes because he has literally been my best friend for years. I care for him so much. He is such a huge part of my life." With all of these thoughts and admissions bubbling to the surface, I continue, but somehow it feels as though I am telling myself, more so than him. "Being with him was easy, you know, we were kind of each other's biggest fan. Somewhere along the way I lost sight of that I guess, grew resentful or something, I don't know." I clear my throat and swallow thickly.

I chose my words carefully as I begin my next explanation. "And no because while I feel an immense sense of remorse for hurting him, lying to him for so long, I don't necessarily feel like I need him back to go on, you know? I feel at ease with my choice in a way. This whole week, I've been struggling, but I am not sure if I was just overwhelmed with guilt, or if I was doing what everyone else expected of me. I think the writing has been on the wall for a while now, I guess I just finally came to terms with it."

Again, we sit in silence. I pick apart my pastry, not wanting to be the first to speak after my damning confession. The longer the silence draws out, the more uneasy I become blurting the only thought going through my head at the moment.

"So now you know, right?"

He looks up at me, swallowing down his coffee puzzled. "Now I know what?"

I grab my hot chocolate, rubbing my finger tip over the lid. "What I am capable of. How cold I can be. Now you know this one was on me, right?"

I don't know why I am baiting him to tear me to shreds or why I feel the need to tell him every crazy reasoning for the break-up in my head or why I feel so comfortable saying these things to him in the first place.

He lightly chuckles again, shaking his head. "Not at all, Swan." He reassures me. He reaches across the table taking my hands in his once again and pulling me closer before whispering, "You can't scare me off that easy."

Relieved to be off the hot seat and having the air between us cleared so to speak, I visibly relax. We talk casually for the next few minutes. Apparently next week is his birthday, so naturally Emmett decided the theme for Thursday night should be a good old' fashioned toga party. I mentally make a note to call Alice to thank her for the outfit, and subtly hint that I need a bed sheet to make me look like a goddess.

Speaking of goddesses, out of the corner of my eye, I catch sight of Rose and Tanya. They loiter near the entrance, watching Edward and I intently. As I wave them over, Edward looks over his shoulder and gives them his signature smirk and a short wave. Tanya gives an O.G. style head nod, while Rose opts for the finger wave, followed by a thumb and pinky phone next to her ear mouthing an exaggerated call me. They turn and exit back out to the union. Rose's hot pink sorority hoody reminds me of a certain situation I have to clarify with Edward.

As he turns back to me, I lean forward to go all Barbara Walters on him. "So… What's the deal with you and Heidi?"

His expression gives nothing away, but I notice his body tenses slightly. He tries to play it off with a snort.

"Heidi. Absolutely nothing." He replies looking directly into my eyes. "We're old friends."

"That's an interesting choice of words there, Cullen. Are you friends with Heidi like you are friends with me?" I ask, secretly praying that he doesn't make a habit of fondling that supermodel on his major appliances.

He shakes his head in the negative and I feel instantly relieved. "No. As far as I am concerned, Heidi and I haven't been friends like that for a while. Our families are tight. People around here assume or expect us to be… more still."

My relief quickly dissipates. He had in fact been her friend, probably in the biblical sense. He also indicates that at this point it is one sided, but encouraged by family and friends. I gnaw at my lip, feeling foolish for thinking I stood a chance with him against her.

"I see." I softly reply.

I feel his fingers against my chin, pulling my face up to look at him. "Hey. Don't read into it. It's not like that." He tries to reassure me.

"Then what's it like?" I counter, my tone a little harsher than necessary.

His jaw tightens, he either clearly doesn't like my line of questioning, or the fact that there doesn't seem to be a clear cut answer. "It's like I said. As far as I am concerned," he stipulates once again, "we are just friends."

"Yeah, I got that. But talk to me like I am four, Edward. I know what it is as far as you are concerned, but how about Heidi. How is it as far as she is concerned?" I bite back, failing miserably to hide the venom in my voice.

His eyes widen in surprise. Oh my God, what the hell is wrong with me? Before he can respond, I put my hands up into a submissive gesture.

"Oh my gosh, please forgive me. I am just… tired and hung-over and clearly minutes away from starting my period or something because I sound like a lunatic. You don't have to answer. I had no right to demand a relationship status from you. I'm just so sorry." I stammer incoherently.

The cocky crooked smirk is back as he reaches for my hands again. He seems to enjoy my vulnerability.

"Bella, stop. You are getting worked up over nothing. There is no me and Heidi in any other capacity than pals. Our dads play golf together; our moms are in a book club together. We literally run in the same circles." He reassures me rubbing his thumb over my hand soothingly. "And besides," he adds seductively, "you know you are the only one I like to do laundry with."

I can't stop the stupid ass grin that forms on my face at his last statement or the way my body begins to flush at the memory. We loiter for about twenty minutes more when he has to leave for his next class. We exchange numbers and each make promises to chat soon since he will be going home to celebrate his birthday over the weekend and I am going on house arrest, trying to catch up on my school work, as well as starting my new part-time gig at the library this weekend.

As I walk back to my dorm, I can't help but think about all of the craziness that the week has brought. Every heightened emotion, every instance, every high and low, every pit and peak, I become more confident that I made the right choice for myself. For the first time in a long time, I feel really alive and excited for the possibilities. I hear footsteps behind me coming up quick and someone calling my name. I would know the voice anywhere and I'm not sure I am ready for this particular awkward encounter.

"Bella, hold up." He shouts, winded as he jogs to catch up to me.

I stand awkwardly and paint on the sad smile that I had worn in our previous uncomfortable meeting this morning.

"Hey Mike." I quietly reply.

He stops about three feet away from me, trying to catch his breath, studying and playing with the strap of his back-pack nervously.

"Uh, Bells. I just wanted to say that I am," he lets out a deep breath as though he has rehearsed this conversation a thousand times, "really sorry for how everything went down the other night." He clears his throat and begins again, "I said some really shitty stuff to you, most of which I didn't mean, but it's no excuse." He looks up at me; the sincerity of his next words ring true in his voice and in his eyes. "I am so sorry."

I let out the deep breath that I've been holding, shaking my head furiously. "Do not apologize to me, Mike," I state firmly, "I honestly don't deserve your kindness. I handled the whole thing horribly; I can't even explain how awful I am for hurting you and you had every right to be angry with me."

He gestures for me to have a seat at a nearby bench. We go back and forth as to who was the worse one, sliding down the shame spiral together. This is the Mike I know, the one who got me and I got him. We each owned up to our portion of the blame.

I admitted that I was sure I could have spent the rest of my life with him, relatively happy because he was that great of a guy, but I had to be true to myself. He agreed saying the same, but also admitting that the physical intimacy in our relationship wasn't that important to him. For him it was the companionship, we were a good team, like his mom and dad. He also opened up about how his dad, who has been pretty sick for the past few weeks, had been diagnosed with cancer the day before. They were going to find out the results of the PET scan on Monday and were hoping for the best. He told me how desperately he wanted to call me, share his fears, just to hear my voice telling him that I was there. I told him he could always call me and that just because we weren't Mike and Bella anymore, didn't mean that we couldn't still be there for each other. We began to part ways with a tight hug and promises to chat often.

As I turn to walk away, Mike stops me, "Hey, wait. So, you and Cullen, huh?" He asks placing his hands in his pockets uneasily.

I smile and shake my head, "Nah, we're just friends."

"Yeah, right, friends," busting out the air quotes as he says friends. "He looks at you like you are something to eat." He finishes as he quirks his brow and shakes his head.

I shake my head, smiling widely. "This comes from the guy who had two coffee dates with Glenn Close from Fatal Attraction?" I ask incredulously making Mike laugh. "I am so serious Mike. She has your kids names picked out and Mrs. Jessica Newton written all over her notebook."

"She does have the crazy vibe doesn't she?" Mike agrees.

"Uh, yeah, if you get chopped into a million little pieces, I know she will be behind it. Seriously, be careful with that one." I warn.

"Will do. And you don't rush into anything either." He advises shaking his finger. "Guys like Cullen can spot an eager beaver from a mile away."

My jaw drops. "Michael Samuel Newton, Jr. Did you just make a joke with sexual innuendo?"

Walking backwards now, he shrugs with a guilty smile, wagging his eyebrows. "See you around, pal." He teases.

And just like that, I had one of my best friends back, a clear conscience, and a text from my newest friend, requesting a follow-up coffee date of my own.

A/N… Oh yeah, did I mention that Mike is involved somewhat significantly throughout the entire story? Oh, I forgot that detail, did I? *chuckles awkwardly* No worries though - there will be no love triangle per say, feel free to put your pitchforks away...

So this chapter begins the countdown to Togaward. No joke, when we get to the Toga party in honor of Edward's birthday - shit gets real. Who's with me? First, how about we let the friends go on a first date of sorts, yes?

Happy Thanksgiving to all those who celebrate the holiday here and abroad! Be safe if you are traveling today, pals!

And speaking of gratitude, thank you so much to everyone who has read, reviewed, followed, favorited and pimped this fic on Facebook! I am humbled by your kindness *bows grandly*