FACADE STAGEPLAY Fri Mar 01 16 06 54 2013
TRIP Where are the new wine glasses?
GRACE What for?
TRIP That should be obvious!
GRACE Oh God, Trip, don't turn this into a big production, please!
WALTER TO THE PLACE!
(WALTER knocks on the front door.)
(WALTER knocks on the front door.)
TRIP Jesus Grace, come on, I'm not - (interrupted)
TRIP Oh, he's here!
GRACE What?! You said he's coming an hour from now!
(WALTER knocks on the front door.)
(WALTER knocks on the front door.)
(WALTER knocks on the front door.)
(WALTER knocks on the front door.)
(WALTER knocks on the front door.)
(WALTER knocks on the front door.)
(WALTER knocks on the front door.)
(WALTER knocks on the front door.)
(WALTER knocks on the front door.)
(WALTER knocks on the front door.)
(WALTER knocks on the front door.)
TRIP No, he's right on time!
(WALTER knocks on the front door.)
(WALTER knocks on the front door.)
(WALTER knocks on the front door.)
(WALTER knocks on the front door.)
GRACE Trip...!
(WALTER knocks on the front door.)
(WALTER knocks on the front door.)
(WALTER knocks on the front door.)
(WALTER knocks on the front door.)
(WALTER knocks on the front door.)
(Trip opens the front door.)
TRIP Walter!
TRIP Hi! It's so great to see you! It's been a while how's it going?
WALTER Hey, how's it going?
TRIP Oh! We're... great. Just great.
TRIP Come on in!
WALTER Okay.
TRIP Y - yeah, come in! - (interrupted)
GRACE No, no, here we are!
GRACE Walter,
GRACE Hi! How are you? God it's been a while!
TRIP Yeah, how - how are you doing?
WALTER I'm doing good. :D
GRACE I just - (interrupted)
GRACE Aw, ha ha ha!
(WALTER hugs grace.)
GRACE H-mmm (happy smile sound)
(WALTER comforts trip.)
GRACE By the way, you look fabulous!
GRACE Make yourself at home, come on in!
(WALTER hugs trip.)
TRIP Huh, I'll close the door.
GRACE So, Walter, I'm hoping you can help me understand where I went - (interrupted)
(Trip closes the front door.)
WALTER You look nice.
GRACE Funny, Walter, for a second there I thought you were flirting with me.
TRIP (clears throat) Well, we're all friends here.
WALTER I'm just being polite. D:
GRACE So, about my decorating...
GRACE (little sigh) This new painting above the couch is, uh, well, a - an experiment...
TRIP Grace tells me she was the highest bidder - (interrupted)
WALTER It looks so amazing. I love it.
TRIP See, I told you he would like it! There's nothing wrong with it.
GRACE (little sigh)
GRACE (little sigh) So yeah, I just bought this painting... - (interrupted)
WALTER You're awesome.
GRACE Uh, no, it looks amateurish, doesn't it?
TRIP (little sigh)
WALTER Maybe a new frame...?
GRACE Yeah...
GRACE (little sigh) You know, when I look at this wedding picture, hanging here in this room...
TRIP There's nothing wrong with it...
GRACE it obviously just does not go anymore... I mean, with my new decorating and all.
TRIP (little impatient sigh) Grace...! - (interrupted)
WALTER Why is the rose blue?
TRIP Oh, yeah, let me fix us all some drinks in a sec!
TRIP Good news, I just fully loaded the bar, with the real quality stuff... only the best for my guests.
WALTER Drinks and rose...?
GRACE I'm sure I - (interrupted)
TRIP Yeah, hang on, ooh, I'm going to make you one of my fabulous drinks in just a minute!
GRACE Uhh, Walter, try not to encourage him.
WALTER I want to try it! :D
GRACE Yeah, yeah...
TRIP See, Grace, no one has a problem with your decorating, it's fine!
(WALTER kisses trip.)
GRACE uh...
TRIP (nervous coughing)
WALTER NOOOOOO!
TRIP you, um...
GRACE (nervous coughing)
TRIP well...
TRIP ha ha...
GRACE ha ha ha ha ha, heh...
TRIP heh, ha ha ha!
GRACE ha ha ha ha!
TRIP Ha ha ha, heh, Walter,
WALTER I'm sorry. I'm ashamed.
GRACE heh heh...
TRIP you're out of control, man...!
TRIP put us on the spot...
TRIP heh heh, you're crazy, heh, you know that?
TRIP ha ha...
(WALTER picks up a trinket 7.)
TRIP (big sigh)
TRIP Anyway... what were we talking about, heh?
WALTER Sad person corner.
TRIP So! Drinks!
(WALTER puts down a trinket 7.)
TRIP So, what's your poison?
TRIP Let's have something fun,
TRIP like a cosmopolitan?
TRIP I just got a hold of this rare imported Icelandic vermouth I want you to try! - (interrupted)
WALTER Poison is poison to me.
TRIP Oh, but everybody loves that!
GRACE Trip don't pressure our friend, okay?
GRACE Walter, how about something simple, like a nice glass of chardonnay?
TRIP but... uhh... - (interrupted)
WALTER AHHHH!
TRIP Okay look I'm just going to open a bottle of merlot and make everybody happy.
TRIP Walter, trust me, it's good stuff. - (interrupted)
TRIP Walter, are you - are you leaving the room?
WALTER SOMEONE HELP ME!
TRIP There's nothing to see in there, only the kitchen...
WALTER IM GONNA DIIIIEEEEE!
TRIP Okay, anyway... I forget what we were talking about...
WALTER My safe room.
TRIP Okay, Walter, I think this evening is over, you've got to leave.
TRIP Walter, come on, you've got to go.
WALTER WHAAAT?!
WALTER AHH!
WALTER NOOOO!
TRIP I'm sorry, but, uhh, I don't know what the deal is with you tonight.
(Trip opens the front door.)
TRIP We'll be fine - you should just go.
(Trip closes the front door.)
WALTER WHAT IS HAPPENING!
WALTER MAGIC!